caspex

I see Vishnu in everything and everything in Vishnu. The contradiction I felt initially between non-duality and bhakti has been resolved. I can verify that Bhakti leads to non-dual states regardless of what you might think. It does so primarily through the heart with no logic involved, just faith. The way it is done by Leo is through Gyana, primarily through the mind. Both work. Both lead to the same place. Bhakti probably has an edge over Gyana too in the sense that Gyana is at a greater risk of feeling dry. However, no way is superior in the sense that one is faster or if one is more dangerous, all depends on who you are. I am going to take time out and go to a few 7 day retreats this year. I must deepen this state. I don't think posting highly organized posts detailing each experience in this thread is a good idea for Bhakti. I find every prior post on this thread to be something I wouldn't have posted as I am today. I love the me who posted them still. I'll post in this thread any new things I do like what happened on a retreat or something. I am going to take a more heart centric approach. Rama

Pretty much. This is why I say 'self-mastery' specifically. I think the one thing I want to master in life is myself. Yeah you're right. But neither positive nor negative motivation worked for me. I had strong positive motivation of going on a trip with friends once a subject was complete. Didn't make it. I also let many people down by procrastinating too. That negative motivation didn't work either. I am so confused man.

For me it's been the opposite. Ever since I was a kid my instinct has been to go to the root of the issue. Looking at the big picture never really occurred to me. If I see a tree, I wanna find out where its roots are, not where it stands in reference to all the other trees, i.e. the forest. Various people have said to me, and I have received this in multiple aptitude tests, that I would be a good researcher because I seem to get hung up on one thing until I can find its root cause. But instead of setting me back in terms of metaphysical thinking and open minded discussions, it really aided me. This tendency of mine to go to the very root is what enabled me to ultimately see I am not real, that my perspectives are relative and that we are all one. I don't explicitly look for big picture connections, but because I have gone to the root of many problems, they seem to automatically connect eventually, because at its root reality itself is connected. I think Scientists' problem isn't that they don't try to see the big picture, rather it is dogma and strictness. That would hinder anybody, even those who do think big picture.

I feel I contemplate too much and act too little. If I just do it, it feels like pain. The boredom is so painful. I thought it was my dopamine receptors being fried or something, so I refrained from social media, etc. and life felt really nice, but the discipline did not arrive. I always seem to be waiting for some 'state' of mind that'll allow me to study my target. That state is all too infrequent. I doubt people who are masters of themselves need to wait for a 'state' to do what they need. I think facing that emotional labor and pain is the only way forward. That is what I am seem to be running away from. That is why I procrastinate. I will never be ready to face that pain, and never not feel that pain unless I actually go do it and get the hang of it. Maybe what it means to achieve self-mastery is to develop one's capacity to tolerate and operate under this pain.

This is precisely where I have seen growth. I don't guilt myself nor stress over the fact of not achieving my daily targets. I realized sometime ago that stressing does not help. I have been relaxed the past few days, but that doesn't seem to help me at all in my consistency. I don't expect myself to work like a machine anymore, but I must at least achieve those targets to achieve my goal. I don't want to give up on my goal. All the people I admire had this one thing in common; They could control themselves. I believe it's my duty and also my right to achieve self-mastery. Yeah, I don't really identify myself as either a lazy person or an active one. I am who I am. But my issue seems very simple. For one, I know I am mentally and physically capable of studying my target. The problem for me seems to be the inner drive. I need certainty really badly. If things don't go according to plan I give up easily. That's too much emotional tension for me. I have seen some recent improvement in this aspect, but without a plan I can't have enough faith in myself that I am working at a good pace, after all I could be doing it really slowly and not realize it until it's too late. I have been doing this for the past two months. I have had many insights regarding my own inner workings. But I am afraid it'll be too late before I achieve enough understanding to attain that discipline I need.

Yeah it's true. Spirituality is not about shunning survival. It's about seeing through it's games, and still taking part in it anyways. The advantage over typical looksmaxxers for some awakened person would be that they don't feel insecure. Looksmaxxing is great for survival. The problem really starts when no matter how much you try, you cannot find yourself beautiful enough to love yourself. Your happiness is more important than your looks, and if you're happiness depends on your looks you need a lot of growing to do. Most looksmaxxers confuse looks with happiness. Looksmaxxing in the most healthy sense can only be achieved when you don't mind being ugly. Paradoxical, this is why nobody does it that way.

I mean it's not fixed that you visit those realms as a human. You could also visit it as a being that enjoys hell. In which case, hell would be heaven while heaven would seem like hell. Wait, so if what's hell is determined by how you absorb any experience, you'd have already experienced hell if you ever suffered deeply, right here on earth.

The Yellow Pipe-Dream

What do you guys think on Authenticity? Why does someone who is authentic attract so many people, good or bad? Are there any costs to authenticity? I know that being inauthentic comes with inner conflict and suffering. Your average person does not see that the benefits of authenticity outweigh the benefits of inauthenticity, why is that? What can cause that shift in clarity?

Just an update here that I am still going strong. Haven't missed a single day. Some stuff has happened but I'll detail everything here when something really significant happens.

@mmKay I live in Delhi, often a contender for the most polluted city on earth. Gotta save up to leave this place first .

Yeah it's quite tricky to explain. People believe it's not even possible, but the mind is capable of imagining it. When you actually get it, it's a big recontextualization into how you perceive space. While thinking of the 4th axis as time is useful to get started, the real goal is to imagine 4 spatial dimensions and how an object- for example a sphere- might move through it. To test myself, I like to imagine a 4D plane and a 3D slice of it being perceived by a being much like humans. Then, I move a sphere- or other shapes- through the 4th dimension, and perceive how it might look within that 3D slice to that being. Then, I go to an actual 4D visualizer software to see whether I got it right, and 8/10 I do. I feel this is more than a simple exercise of the mind. The stark difference between 3D and 4D space actually mirrors quite well how in many aspects of life, we perceive things in a flat manner, when to see a truer picture, we need to add an extra axis. To me, that sudden recontexualization from 3D to 4D actually quite closely resembles that recontexualization you get moving from ego-self to no-self.

You wouldn't try to change your parents. The reason you get along with people when you're awakened is not because you have some otherworldly aura emanating from you that purifies people, rather, it's because your heart is open and you're able to receive everybody where they are at. If you're gonna get frustrated just because your parents don't share the same values as you then you have a long way to go. You're attached to them. Love is different from attachment. In Sanskrit, the words for unconditional love and conditional love are different, प्रेम (Prema) & मोह (Moha). When I look at my parents all I feel is love. I become like them, enjoy life in the way they live it. That's what it is about. It is not about locking yourself in a state that makes you feel like a saint or a monk. I don't rationalize their behaviors, their dysfunctions. There is no such thing as dysfunctions. If you can experience that cosmic love even with those who you were once very emotionally bonded to, you know what's up.

Common Leo W

Has a great series on visualizing 4D. It helped me do it. It's a game changer in the way you think about stuff.

I usually feel like I got forcefully pulled out of another dimension. I don't feel tired though. I think it's just really imaginative and immersive dreams most of the time.

This is just like having heavy metals in your brain except you can't do anything about it.

Hey so this is sort of a continuation of this post I made a year ago: I have now successfully internalized that state somewhat. I do not feel empty and lonely by being the only one, my heart feels full and complete. I am happy, I feel joy, but strangely I am still curious. A feeling that I can go further. The very fact I feel this way, that I need to make this post, means I am missing something, but I don't get it. I need help. Here's how my state is for context: I don't exist and my chest feels full. Existence including my body is filled with joy. We are all one, so there's no we. Existence is perfect and unfolding as it should. It's unfolding and absolutely still at the same time. I feel like a video game playing itself. I am God. Aham Brahmasmi. There's no doubt about it. This joy of being eternal and immortal brings immense joy, but since nobody experiences it, it only multiplies and increases. Here's the problem: This joy brings with itself satisfaction, but I push it away. That's because I once heard somebody talk about how satisfaction on the spiritual path will stagnate you from going further. Is the next step to just let that principle go and be satisfied? How can I then ensure I progress? I don't even know what's next. Do I just deepen this feeling as God?

I appreciate the replies. I have decided to integrate and go deeper with these current states instead of suspecting any further leaps of consciousness. I might make a similar post next year. @Someone hereThat's a good point. I forgot that model was a thing. I'll rewatch that video as well. Thank you.

@Karla That's why I asked you all

I appreciate the replies. But I feel like there is something more. @Leo Gura I'd appreciate it if you have anything to say. I don't know who else to tag... Should I start taking psychedelics? I still think it's too early for me. I am sure they would open a new dimension of depth for me but I'd have to invest time and money to get some which is relatively high for me right now. Plus after watching the dangers of psychedelics video I want to work on my shadow more. Or maybe I should stop being such a pussy about it and get some, I am confused.

It's in the phrase, you're making it up.

You're description seems the most accurate to me. This would explain why achieving enlightenment before physical death completely circumvents heaven and hell straight to moksha. But yeah you know, you're still gonna come back. This is why I like Bhakti yoga because if your version is right, that means those who do Bhakti might go to a made up world of their deity instead of heaven and hell, and before they eventually reincarnate, they might get to enjoy eternity with their favorite idol. I don't know.

From what I can gather, once you truly die you become pure potential, which is what nothingness is. But pure potential cannot help but become something eventually. This is why I think reincarnation is the most likely. But we must also consider whether there exists other layers of this living being that might continue after physical death. Either way, whatever happens after death would not be permanent, like everything else. I think you should rather be relieved to know your existence is eternal. What's terrifying is that you'd be eternal as well, which I don't see to be the case.

If the physical layer was out of sync with the energetic layer they wouldn't stick together for so long and the body would die. You might be misidentifying a fabricated aspect of your being with the energetic layer. From what I can gather, when you don't feel like you're in sync, that's mostly activity on the mental/emotional plane largely concerned with survival. I think there's great insight in it when you say we're not humans and actually metaphysical beings however the feeling of 'you' such as a unicorn, baby or a velociraptor is not part of that metaphysical being in any objective sense. It's rather a survival oriented fabrication by the emotional/mental layer of your being. That changes overtime and therefore what feels like 'being you'. It's not great practice to put so much emphasis on 'feeling'. Energy is mostly becomed not felt; then it becomes really hard to see through that it's still not you. The energetic layer, when experienced is overwhelmingly intense, at least for me. It's not a mere feeling or emotion.