caspex

1 August ' 23 I have just come back from doing today's pooja. I started it as soon as I finished writing the last post, and man... every time I do pooja of Hanumana my ego gets a serious beating. I see how I bullshit myself, it's like nothing can be hidden from Hanumana. Even though I try not to hide anything from Hanumana, I do self-deceive, and it becomes apparent during the pooja. As an ego, I am pathetic. I mean that I am such a pathetic being that I keep inflating myself. Everyday Hanumana beats up my ego and I build it right back the next day. What the fuck am I doing... I AM NOTHING COMPARED TO MY POTENTIAL. That's the main point I need to get through my head. My mind, in actuality, is that of a child compared to what I believe it to be. I love myself dearly, and I can't bear looking at myself like this. It's for this love that I must look at myself as who I really am. It's for this love that I must stop being so petty, so stupid. Note to self: If you are feeling good, and become attached to it(not wanting it to end), you have built back ego. Update By the way, I took a Sankalpa around a week ago that I'll do 21 chalisas each day for 11 days. (Takes an hour twenty minutes each day) It was my first proper Sankalpa so I was nervous that I might fail it if I make it too ambitious. You cannot fail a Sankalpa at any point otherwise everything you have done in the Sankalpa so far goes to waste and that's a big setback in your Bhakti. This one will end on the 3rd of August and I plan to begin a new one the day after. This time it'd be 51 chalisas for 21 days(2 - 2.5 hours each day). I plan to eventually build up my capacity for Bhakti. My goal is to do a 41 day Sankalpa where I do 100 Chalisas a day. (3.5 - 4 Hours per day). This one is supposed to grant some wish of yours, but it's also supposed to get harder as the days go on and you'll be faced with many dilemmas and tests. At least that'd what I have heard from others talking about it when they did it. I plan to begin that one with the intent to gain some sort of Siddhi. Obviously it won't be one of the main 8, that's out of bounds for even a 41 day Sankalpa. However, you do have a chance to gain Hanumana Siddhi from it. Which is that Hanumana or one of his envoy beings(which are practically Hanumana himself) will stay with you at all times, protecting you and helping you out. In this fashion, you are also able to ask them to help someone else, or do exorcisms. You'd also be able to ask Hanumana to take you on Astral Trips. I mean it largely varies depending on what Hanumana allows for you. Regardless, there is a possibility that if you ask Hanumana for some minor Siddhis like being able to see the future, read minds or other such powers, and Hanumana deems you fit, he'd actually give that to you. And if I am able to gain such a Siddhi, I'll be able to prove once and for all that deities really do exist, and all the other good stuff that it implies! This is something I have been curious about since childhood. Even if I don't get anything, I'll likely continue on Bhakti because it's not really about the Siddhis to begin with.

Connecting Spiral Dynamics and Bhakti(Of Hanumana) I'll do this multiple times as this thread marches forward with time. Reason being that I'll draw more connections as I keep doing Bhakti and it'd be a disservice to any reader to try cramp it all up into one post. This post would not be systematic in drawing connections but rather would just consist of my thoughts and observations so far. It'll focus on Bhakti of Hanumana as I don't have a lot of experience in the overall practice of Bhakti to draw meaningful connections. It seems at first that all Bhakti of Hanumana (I'll refer to as simply 'Bhakti' from now on) does is give someone like a Stage Red Savage meaning and purpose in life to evolve to Stage Blue, like most other religious practices. However, while it does do that, it's so much more than that. Hanumana not only wants you to integrate fully stage Blue by following his rules, he will also help you get your shit together and integrate Stage Orange quite smoothly. More than that, so far, I have gained amazing, and I mean AMAZING integration in Stage Green. Through devotion and love towards Hanumana and Rama, my capacity to love anything has increased a lot. I am a lot more gentle with people and a lot more understanding. I have gained great understanding into selflessness and love. It's to be expected after all! When you consistently, consciously and unconditionally love anything for hours everyday, you'd expect your understanding of unconditional love to skyrocket. From what I have understood so far through my research into Bhakti, it seems what Hanumana really wants for you before he teaches you anything spiritual, is to atleast reach Stage Yellow in a complete fashion. Meaning everything prior is already integrated. It's quite evident because every advanced devotee seems to say that Hanumana loves it when you follow your Dharma(A combination of following your dreams/desires/life purpose and doing your duties/taking responsibility for your role in whichever holon you are a part of) Being able to properly follow your Dharma easily indicates a well integrated Stage Blue, Orange AND Green person. If you ever have a hard time understanding Dharma, know that it is what a Stage Yellow Person completely integrated in the prior stages would act like. To know what that looks like, read Ramayana and Mahabharata. Let's be honest however, it's more the practice of Bhakti itself doing its magic than Hanumana himself. Hanumana likely comes in much later(in matters of self-development) as you get better at his Bhakti. I think this is because the reason you'd see your flaws and the solution to them, is because Hanumana is just that perfect of an idol. Once you completely focus on him, it's easy to see your own shortcomings in comparison to him. He shows you what you could be, and through shame you better yourself bit by bit. Even if you are not ashamed, you cannot resist the pull of that goodness of being so filled with integrity. Simple Bhakti of Hanumana gives you a little taste of what it means to be with integrity, and you can't resist going towards that. This, all on top of the unconditional love you are generating and receiving. This love quite literally PURIFIES your mind and your ego. You beat down your ego each day like hitting the gym but instead of lifting weights you are pulling bars made of love. This makes it even easier to make changes in yourself according to those adjustments you so see. Hanumana and Rama give you a finish line and loving them is running towards it. If you do Bhakti properly each day, it's inevitable you'll almost completely integrate Tier 1 someday. It's INEVITABLE. But that doesn't guarantee an integration of Stage Yellow. That'll only happen if your intent is so. Because here is where the supernatural aspect comes in. Hanumana is a deity. He is supposed to be a being outside of your head(let's not get solipsistic for now). He will help you materially if you are genuine about it. He will also bestow upon you Siddhis if you so work for them through Sadhanas. (From what I have heard) And you can leave it all at that. You don't have to go further than that. But if you ask Hanumana, he's supposed to take you beyond, into Stage Yellow, Turquoise and beyond. I don't have any experience in this, but this is what I have heard. Spiral Dynamics is not a perfect model and neither is my understanding of it or that of Bhakti for that matter. This is what I have gathered so far and it is rather half-baked, as are most things jotted down in a journal. So as is usual, employ your own logic and take what seems to work for you. I can tell that these observations are full of holes but I am sure I'll realize and correct them as I go forward.

it's because of that suffering that one really grows as fast they do in the 70-90 years you get. Realistically if you prioritized your growth you'd choose this type of life anytime. You choose an easy life because you prioritize your ego. While that leads to growth(like literally everything else) it's hella slow compared to what suffering gets you. Besides, life isn't fair. There's no guarantee that boundaries and forms in reality completely dissolve after your physical death. It's obvious that if you truly die in every sense of the word you'd become God, but you don't know if that is what will happen when you die physically. It could be that there is an entire astral world with its own rules and regulations, own laws, that you have to deal with after you die, that too without a physical body and a mental mind. Maybe you have an astral body and stuff. I'd say it's wise to listen to various traditions you trust and figure something out that way, and to not assume physical death is true death.

Jerking off seems mechanical even in comparison to the sober states of pleasurable awakening I have personally reached, I can't imagine it comparing to what 5-Meo has to offer.

What I needed as a 13 year old was the ability to be independent. My parents actually gave me a ton of freedom but I needed that push to make independent decisions apart from the help of my elders. I never got that at the time and I had to learn it the hard way in the last few years. (I am 19 in 2 months). Not only inspire but get him to join fields and communities that you know he'll excel at or get some sort of achievement in, and then praise him for it. He should be praised for being a man. He should feel responsible and reliable. The thing lacking at the age is a sense of direction for most teenage boys and you trying to figure out how to be responsible and reliable as you approach 15-16 years of age. There is a lack of certainty due to inexperience. This is what his male idols should provide him, before he can develop his own sense of independence and direction. As a mother you should definitely provide him with a lot more love, genuine love. Softness, tenderness and gentleness. You should be the one teaching him humbleness and empathy. Selflessness for the sake of love and nothing else. The reason you should be the one doing these things is because it's way more effective from a mom than a dad. A simple act of motherly embrace can teach him a lot more empathy than any logical explanation of why. If you show him what true authentic femininity looks like it will steer him away from porn or sex addiction. It will also help in finding a good partner. The reason for that is because you would be that one female(if he doesn't have sisters, in which case them too) he doesn't view sexually but with respect, love and admiration in his life. This teaches a man to transmute that creative energy towards a female from becoming sexual to that of admiration and love. Because of this ability, he'll have control over his sexual urges if he wishes to develop that capacity later in life. Which is one of the most important abilities for a man with integrity. All I am saying is that while it's important to mainly focus on all the masculine aspects that you and other male role models can give to him, you should not forget to give a secondary focus on feminine qualities such as gentleness and empathy, which need not be taught but just shown to him. The reason I emphasize this because others here have already given advice focuses on masculinity, and that is also what would be the most prevalent advice on this forum.

The imperfect being is stuck in a cycle, the perfect being has transcended it

Leo's way of awakening is very destructive but also fast. Of course relationships will crumble. But that isn't to say you can't build them back once you are at a sufficiently stable growth rate.

When you strip away everything and see the oneness between you and another, and then bring in your ego and see that it too, is one with the other, you'll feel love as is natural. Feeling love is the natural state, everything else is on top of it for survival reasons. You don't need a reason to love. You don't need to see any inherent value or redeeming qualities within someone to love them, that's bullshit.

The "control" is an illusion. It seems concrete because you have firmly established you awareness within your ego which is the one doing any controlling. But when you transcend that, you transcend your experience in a way that you paradoxically become your experience. There you realize that this control is an illusion like everything else. It will be apparent to you that there is no difference between the 'not controlling of your neighbor's hands' and 'controlling of your own hands'. Yourself will become akin to a lying a rock, and a lying rock will become akin to you. The duality of alive and dead collapses and so does of the controlled and non-controlled. It's a very literal experience, you don't have to imagine anything.

God is Infinite so it should be possible for a truly immortal existence to exist. Even if it is contradictory and paradoxical. Since Time is only a part of God, for something to exist infinitely would be no big deal. Thing is, in our current state of consciousness, with our limited knowledge and human logic, we cannot determine these things. It'd be stupid to be certain of any conclusion here.

Usually I catch it in my hands and let it out the window. But there are situations where killing is unavoidable.

Insight: Purification I was doing my daily pooja when I could suddenly see the various folds / patterns in my mind that were blockages to a naturally self-realized mind. They looked disgusting and it made me realize something. I need to purify all of this from my mind, not only that, but I need to purify my body, my speech and also my actions. I thanked Hanumana for the insight and realized something else. I had asked Hanumana to become my Guru when I started. And I have been receiving relevant insights for my life every time I do the pooja, even on the days I feel the Bhakti didn't go that well. That's a connection I am willing to make. These insights seem to be giving me directions as to what to do to become pure / capable enough to even become a disciple of Hanumana. It seems one needs to be at least stage Yellow with all of the previous stages FULLY integrated. Which also means you have an excellently well integrated shadow. In addition one would need to follow a particular way of living too. Let me expand on this insight I got. This is not objective, it is subjective to my life and who I am. Purification of the Body: Drink a lot of water. 8 glasses of water is nearly not enough as is recommended. It really depends on what you eat. The more junk, oil and processed shit you eat the more water you need. Water is a purification liquid. It will purify your body of a lot if you just drink enough of it. I don't know how much this is backed by science, but I this is what I have received. Don't have excess body fat. Around 20% should be ideal with some muscle and such. Diet should contain very less oil, should be completely vegetarian and avoid onion and garlic. (Reason being non-veg, onion and garlic increase sexual urges and can make you feel heavier). No alcohol as well. Goes without saying but no cigarettes or harmful drugs / substances. Cardio everyday. Should be more than you think you need. It's more important than any sort of strength training. Always wear clean clothes(avoid dark colors), smell good and have a clean body. Live in a clean and good-smelling environment. Purification of the Mind: The blockages I saw that should completely be eliminated from ones mind were arrogance, fear, greed, lust, envy, gluttony and anger. Yes, I just realized I have listed down the seven deadly sins. Yes, I am shocked as well. These blockages in comparison to how pure your mind can be are absolutely disgusting. Having these plague your mind is like being covered in wounds festering and infected, with flies buzzing all around. It's like you are a dead rat with maggots eating you from the inside out. I am serious, this is how disgusting these blockages really are. Of course one should do the usual shadow work and other spiritual or psychological practices to integrate themselves out of these blockages, but here's a way to speed up the process, like adding grease to gears. Chant the name of Rama. It would only work though if you have a good idea of the character of Rama in the Ramayana and from other sources. The man is literally the ideal man. He is the perfect idol. Chanting his name would impart you with his qualities as you constantly think of his qualities and devote yourself to him. Some men would be insecure about submitting to another man, but the humbleness required to do so is exactly what will aid you to gain mastery over your mind and emotions. Besides, he is not just any man, he is literally the ideal male archetype. From what I have heard, chanting his name also works for females. Should also mix up with chanting 'Sita-Ram'. Sita is the name of his wife and you should see her as your mother. Appreciate her character as well and you'll see how pure the love between the two was. It'll melt your ego seeing their love. Which is what is supposed to happen every time you chant that. Make sure your love for Ram and Sita makes the chanting physically pleasurable otherwise you can't really continue chanting that. Treat it as a fun activity. It's better than using your phone on the toilet. When you take their names you should be aware you are taking the names of literal spiritual giants. If you don't already know then research into the four yugas according to Hinduism. They were towards the end of the second Yuga when almost everyone was naturally self-realized. Just imagine such a world, and then know that even among people of this yuga they were hailed as Gods. Purification of Action and Speech: Don't lie and deceive. Don't speak ill of others. Don't steal and all the other bad shit. Do good deeds. Follow your Dharma. Dharma is a complex topic to explain and it doesn't always just mean following your duties. It also means following your purpose as a being incarnated onto this earth. Whether you are aware of this purpose or not is a different matter. I believe that's a problem exclusive to the last yuga which we are supposedly in right now. Obviously people can't follow these perfectly or their lives would fall apart or their environment doesn't allow them to follow these, therefore just follow to the extent you can. Why this matters: If you follow these rules from the position of love of the other (and not ego), such actions and speech will build up over time and you'll be imparted with this sense of power and good-will towards others that you cannot generate on your own. Your character and integrity becomes so strong that you become unbreakable and are able to achieve feats you could not before. If it isn't already obvious I am having a Stage Blue Awakening, and that's important for the awakenings later on. Reminding you once again that this is a subjective list specifically tailored to me. Some of this might not work for you.

Same goes with sexual activities like masturbation and sex, with or without porn in the mix. I have only realized what you said recently when I left masturbation and other forms of food that causes drastic changes in state. Without all of these things that change your state you actually feel much lighter at your baseline and contemplation is much easier. States of sober awakening are also much more stable. Personally, it's much easier to generate pleasant feelings in the body and the mind.

I would argue for spiritual people they should not even masturbate and figure out a way to transcend it. What affects more a person is their diet and lifestyle habits than their natural inclination to being sexual. I believe almost every human being has the capability to transcend even sexual thoughts if they just live the right way. I had stopped masturbating for a week, two weeks, even a month, but I felt so frustrated and stressed that I started once again. This cycle of relapsing kept going for over a year. If I had taken your advice here I would still be masturbating every other day because that was natural for me. Later on I changed my diet and lifestyle according to yogic and vedic teachings and I have easily held off even sexual thoughts since day one, and it'll be a month soon for me. Infact, I have not even had any wet dreams. I have stopped consuming all content with even a little sexuality in it. With my other spiritual practices, I feel much better in my day to day life and lighter, so I don't even think I am missing out by not masturbating because my baseline occasionally becomes better than the state of orgasm (serious). What I am trying to say is, if you are truly serious about spirituality you should seriously consider leaving sexuality behind, because it frees up a lot of time and space in your life and in your head. For example, sleep is natural and feels good and is even healthy, but if you could permanently leave it behind (with a naturally peaceful waking state) then you would take that offer. It is similar with sex and I believe most here are not that serious about spirituality to even try such a radical change for a year or two to truly see how much better it feels. Obviously with psychedelics it doesn't matter but if you give any fucks about your baseline, properly leaving sex behind has amazing benefits. I have never truly indulged in the nofap community so I don't know what they say about this matter. I think your average person doesn't need to leave masturbation behind and what you said should apply to your average person, but not to a person who is seriously spiritual.

Once the energy manifests itself as sexual within you it's already too late. The transmutation happens before it becomes sexual in nature, before you feel horny. It's the state where you can easily become horny but you are not horny at all. In this state of potentiality when you invest emotionally in something the energy transmutes automatically.

You can't get over it because you are insecure comparing yourself to the other men. Realize sex is a small part of the world and your relationship. All that matters is how the past body count affects the personality and attitude of the girl towards you. If she is intelligent and conscious, it shouldn't matter what her body count is.

I think most people who do pickup have unresolved emotional problems

I have tried playing with advanced metaphysical concepts and explaining them to it, which takes a lot from you to do by the way so it's good practice, and I have learned that ChatGPT simply forgets some founding concept of your main concept that you explained to it a while ago. This makes teaching it complex concepts through chatting impossible.

It's definitely fun and it's practically useful to know how to shittalk well. However, it's just a form of entertainment. For spiritual purposes it'd be a distraction. There's nothing wrong with doing it on a regular basis with your friends just like there is nothing wrong with frequently watching movies, but be aware how it affects your thinking and life, just like with any form of entertainment.

In general it satisfies the curiosity of people regarding violence and the emotions involved in a physically safe manner. While it leaves a massive impression on your mind, it may or may not be a bad thing depending on the person. In context of spirituality, violence and morbidity in general can be of use to observe for someone in their path. For some people it's absolutely detrimental to watch such things in their spiritual path but for some others it might aid in understanding. You cannot dismiss the existence of such movies for this reason. I believe most violent and emotional movies are made to showcase some reality of situation in our world, which is socially important and it's supposed to leave a impression. You should know what you are getting yourself into before you watch a movie and it takes a few mistakes before you develop that sense.

Truth is not separate from imagination that it had to develop it. Truth IS imagination and always has been. You don't have to contemplate it, just stop imagining that imagination is different from truth. When it comes to Truth you don't contemplate you just systematically stop imagining one by one. This Truth is imagining itself. This is where you collapse that duality.

The dream changes itself all the time, What's predestined is also part of the dream so if the dream so wills it can change. It changes based on whatever makes the most sense. What makes the most sense is the path of least resistance.

In Hinduism if you look at the stories of Ramayana and Mahabharata you will see that Rama and Krishna both advocate a spirituality that is integrated with the material life. I think this is the essence of Hinduism, to give you a spirituality that is well integrated and helps you in the material, until you are liberated. Today's Hinduism is far from that but I think if you read these stories as it is, you will get a good idea of what that kind of spirituality looks like.

Cycles of Optimism and Pessimism As I have said earlier I do pooja/Bhakti at 9 PM. I feel so optimistic of my coming future and self after pooja however as I go to sleep and the next day comes, the effects of the pooja are slightly gone. By the time it's around 1-2 PM the next day, the effects are all gone, and I feel anxiety and negative towards what's happening. I do not believe it's due to a negative being attached to me, as I have checked using the Camphor Method. I'll explain that in a bit. These negative feelings are logical and valid, so when I am in that state I am baffled at my previous self being so optimistic. By the time it's time to do pooja, I almost don't want to. But when I start doing pooja, I love it. I am optimistic again and couldn't remember why I was feeling so negative. I have a few ideas as to why this is and I am sure it has to do with my lifestyle. I need more energy and therefore I will be incorporating yoga and pranayama earlier in the day. My chakras do not feel active anymore, and I think that's because I am not doing 100 chalisas a day like I was doing before. That's fine, because I had not taken a Sankalpa beforehand anyways. What's a Sankalpa? Sankalpa means "Determination" and it's something you do before you undertake a period of pooja. Let's say you want to commit to a period of 21 days doing 11 Hanumana Chalisas a day. So, you take some water in your right hand, say your intention "I, [name], will do 11 Hanumana Chalisas each day for 21 days starting today on [date]." and then drop the water on the ground and let it evaporate. The reason you would do this is because the fruits of your pooja are actually transferred to you and not taken by any other entity. It's also said that Indra, the king of Gods, will get the fruits of your pooja if you don't take sankalpa beforehand. Anyways, it's like a promise to the deity that you will do something. You can then ask the deity for something, by stating the reason you are doing this period of pooja. Once you take a sankalpa, you can't get up from the spot before you fulfill it, so in the previous example, you can't get up until you do 11 chalisas that day. It need not be said during the Sankalpa because these rules are implicit, but deities have their rules attached to them if you want to successfully impress them. During a Hanumana Upasana Sankalpa period, you should not eat non-veg items, eggs, onions, garlic and drink alcohol. Those things are strictly off-limits and to the extent you decide to follow these rules decides the extent to which Hanumana is impressed by you. Like you can choose to eat onions and garlic and avoid everything else. There's another rule that you can do which is sleeping on the floor only. Where you lay down a mattress or something on the floor. If you fail your sankalpa then you have to start over. The deity might even be angry at you depending on how you failed your sankalpa. Kapoor Vidhi (The Camphor Method) This method is used to check if you have any sort of negativity messing you up, giving you bad luck and all that. You just take a camphor square and hold it in your hand while you read 21 or moreso Hanumana Chalisas. You would just add this in your normal practice of bhakti, you don't have to change much. If while reading the chalisas you start feeling a lot of discomfort or pain in your hand or forearms, or your hand starts getting super heavy, or it feels like the camphor is burning your hand, that means you have a negative entity attached to you. How bad it gets shows how bad the influence is. For me it was simply a heavy hand and some pain in the forearm yesterday during the last few chalisas yesterday, and today it felt like it burned a little bit. So I do have negative influence but it wasn't very uncomfortable so I know it's not that bad. It's possible every person has atleast this amount of negative influence. If you hold it too tight or are too paranoid you'll obviously feel uncomfortable so be relaxed about it. These feelings should happen on there own. Once you are done with the chalisas, take that camphor bit and set it ablaze and let it melt away, then end your pooja normally. You do this once in the day and once in the night for however long the problem persists. I am doing this only at night because that's when I do pooja. That burning of the camphor is symbolized as Hanumana beating up that negativity. Some More Things This post is too long right now so I'll talk about this next time but I had a very shocking dream. I will not reveal a lot of the details as it is very personal but it really disturbed me. I put on those clothes I bought on the statue of Hanumana I have at home and he honestly looks so cute but also intense. It has really helped me increase my bhakti and focus more though. I also put him over a red cloth. These are the standard practices to keep Hanumana Murti(Statue) at home. You also have to use a mixture of orange vermilion powder and jasmine oil to put/color the statue periodically. It has a nice scent. This is why when you search "Hanumana Murti in Mandir" you'll see some orange statues of him. I'll try to connect concepts I have learnt here on Actualized.org with Bhakti as I slowly get more experienced in it. As it stands now I am a lot more well-versed here than in Bhakti lol.

Quality over Quantity I find it important to update that I have dropped the number of chalisas that I do each day from 100 to 51. Meaning the whole pooja(the process of Japa and Bhakti) takes 2 - 2.5 hours instead of 3.5 hours now. I start at 9 PM and end it at around 11:30 PM. The reason is that even though I am perfectly capable of doing 100 each day, I can only do proper Bhakti till half way through. This is because of my limited capability of being able to do Bhakti. This can be increased gradually which I didn't do. It's better do 51 Chalisas with amazing Bhakti than 100 chalisas with mediocore Bhakti. It is said that performing Japa of even one chaupai (a set of two lines from the chalisa) with heart is better than performing Japa of the whole chalisa in a robotic way. And that makes sense, Hanumana is not a robotic machine that you can get your work done with, he is an entity, an entity much more intelligent and powerful than yourself. He is said to roam the earth in a physical body as an immortal at the current moment. So you really have to be genuine and honest with yourself about how you view him. It all comes down to your love and faith in him. But that's not to say Quantity plays no role at all. The amount you decide to do, and successfully do, also shows your dedication. Visiting a Hanumana Temple for the First Time I could see his statue from the doorway, 5 feet tall, garlanded and fully orange. It didn't feel like a normal lifeless statue to me, it felt as if it was actually looking at me. My senses had been alerted. I went inside and bowed to him, placing my forehead on the ground. I could feel an intense energy radiating from the statue showering my head and my back. I am sure someone who is not a bhakt will not feel this as intensely if at all. That's all I did this time, I just wanted to witness the temple. I realized something. It's important to visit temples and witness the real energy of these deities and not to stay holed up in your home. This is because what you do bhakti towards at home starts connecting with the energy from the temple. The energy you worship becomes more authentic. And this temple wasn't even some big deal. It was just your usual Hanumana temple you'd find multiple of in every district. I can only imagine what the designated famous temples for Hanumana like Balaji Mehndipur would feel like. It is said to visit Hanumana Temple every Tuesdays and Saturdays and this is what I have decided to do. For if I don't do this my Bhakti will not progress as fast. What's Up with Statues? A statue more than 6 inches tall has a ritual done to it known as "Prana Prathista" in which you infuse life force / prana within it. Every temple is expected to do this but not all of them do, and as a sensitive person you can clearly feel which statue has had Prana Prathista done to it. The idea is that it will be infused with some energy connected to the deity, so when you do your pooja or connect your pooja to it, you have better connectivity to the real deity. At home one is supposed to keep statues less than 6 inches tall because if you do keep a statue with Prana Prathista done do it then you have to treat your home like a temple because you have to think of the statue as the deity itself in your home. The statues you worship at home are supposed to only represent or symbolize the deity and help you in bhakti towards it, but that doesn't mean the deity, once it has it's eyes on you, does not care what happens to the statue. Out of bhakti I bough some clothes and other garments, a red cloth to sit on and some other necessary things for the statue I have at home. The cleaner and well-kept it is, the easier it is for you to do Bhakti towards the deity. You could also have a picture of the deity instead of a statue, which serves the same purpose. Obviously whether an entity like the deity is all in your head or not has nothing to do with decorating your symbol of it at home. As for the temples, you can literally feel the intensity of energy if you have been doing Bhakti of the deity. It's very interesting and I will treat it all of it as real, because that's what's intended and expected in the practice of Bhakti.