MusicalMillipede

Was just rewatching Leo’a journaling vid

@Leo Gura How can someone tell if the understanding of reality is accurate? Can it be completely accurate?

@trenton Yeah, I get what you mean. I'm embarrassed of just about everything about myself. I'd say I'm embarrassed that I exist

@trenton I think I understand better. Hopefully one day I can get on that level and let go of the stuff I can’t seem to forgive people for. I’m very far away mentally from accomplishing something like that though

What is morality? What is the purpose of morality? What is the purpose of its purpose? Nobody gives me an answer I really understand

That is a very interesting way to put it. I kinda just saw it as a bad thing. Although, I know I want a relationship for selfish reasons. This is a nice contrast between outlooks on it.

I have never thought of trying that. Thank you

How do I stop wanting a relationship? I have serious issues with loving myself. I go as far as hating myself. I keep trying to rely on someone else to love me. Someone else to think I’m beautiful to satisfy my self-image. That is why I want a relationship. I believe loving myself would be the first step to solve this but I am trying so hard to open my mind to it. Idk what to do. I’ve been trying for a long time. I’ve meditated and realized I need to stop identifying myself with what I do. Anything bad or even good that I do should not be labeled as myself. Putting that into the way I think is different. Accepting myself is so difficult. Is there anything else I should be doing?

@Raptorsin7 I find majority of men attractive. I’m into “average looking“ guys. I’m a sucker for long hair though. It depends on the person. My tastes changed throughout my short life. Your taste can be changed I would guess based on my experience

@Nomad13 I didn’t feel tired at all. Odd. Very strange experience though

@SamueLSD I like that it lasts long. Time slowed down A LOT on the peak. I feel like I could possibly get more done if it lasts long though? If that makes sense? Thinking about it logically. I had a real easy time meditating because of the after effects. I felt nothing. But I did get angry the next day but I was still able to meditate. Is there anything that lasts as long? I’m researching ayahuasca currently. I’ve read that 5MeO is a bit more potentially dangerous. Idk if I’m willing to try that. Sounds pretty scary Thank you for your input! I appreciate you sharing your experience

Not for me yet. I’ve only used 1p LSD once and did not feel more loving at all. I’m hoping it will next time. I personally struggle with lack of enough empathy

@SamueLSD Should I continue doing LSD for meditation? Or are there some other psychedelics that might be way better for this? I get good insights from meditation every now and then. Sometimes I just feel weird. The only thing is actually changing something. I wanna change my current mentality. I’ve researched and done the 1p LSD because it was legal mostly. Any suggestions would be great

It was my first time doing psychedelics a few months ago. I did 1p LSD and it was a weird experience. I did 100 micrograms. It felt surreal and dreamy of course and at one point I felt like I kept falling through the earth and it felt good for whatever reason. That kept replaying over and over. Also felt like I kept dying over and over at one point. I do think I’ve made progress with meditating though! I still can meditate from time to time. Not as great as when I was on the acid but I feel like I’ve learned more about how to actually do it. Another weird thing is, I felt nothingness after the peak for a good while. No emotion at all. I was trying to keep myself in that state. I kept yearning to feel excitement or other feelings the whole time. I wasn’t satisfied with the feeling of nothing. Not sure what that means or what to think about that? But the next day, after sleeping, I was feeling a bit angry and couldn’t pin point why. I still cannot see why I was angry that day. It was a very strange but interesting experience.