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Everything posted by mandyjw
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mandyjw replied to Aldo's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Shin I know, right? -
mandyjw replied to Aldo's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Shin Life in plastic, it's fantastic. -
mandyjw replied to Aldo's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Kanye quotes... “Keep your nose out the sky, keep your heart to god, and keep your face to the raising sun.” “The prettiest people do the ugliest things.” “I really appreciate the moments that I was able to win rap album of the year or whatever.” Sounds like he's pretty woke. -
mandyjw replied to George Fil's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@DrewNows Yep. It's nothing and it's also ALL OF THE THINGS and daily I get wrapped up in what it is or is not. I got up this morning knowing that I'm supposed to go pick up trash on the side of the road and love everyone who threw it out while I do it. It sounds like a wonderful opportunity to build a massive spiritual ego. Then I saw on Facebook that there is a scheduled trash pick up event today. So I just have to show up at the library and join in... that was weird. -
mandyjw replied to mandyjw's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@whoareyou I'm trying not to get too settled on any practice or no practice. -
So I'm a bit shy to post this, but I was just working through Leo's most recent video and I he mentioned this very topic so i thought that maybe the time was right to talk about it. I had an awakening a few weeks ago. Couldn't eat, couldn't sleep was guided through it by someone on the forum here. When I was a kid I knew that I was insane. Later I talked to my friend who had read a book about a kid with OCD and I knew then that that was what was wrong with me. The impulses were sometimes to go do things or say things that I had no logical reason for doing. The impulses latched on to my strong religious beliefs and told me to accept the devil into my soul and I was incredibly tormented by those most of all. The told me to confess things to people. I made myself very ill confessing to my mother something about getting naked with other kids a child. I realize now that I could have given into it, and awakened as a kid and saved myself a lot of pain. But I probably would have landed in the mental institution. I didn't have the support then that I needed of the background of understand that Leo's videos have provided as well as many others. The impulses I had, they weren't intrusive thoughts but rather they were intuition on how I could awaken and see the world as it was. When I started this work I really loved the idea of having a clear mind or peace of mind. I didn't realize that my resistance to turmoil and painful thoughts was my ego. I had a spiritual opening with the death of my Grandmother. I realized that she was unconditional love. Holding her hand when she died and then touching her dead hand in the funeral home later changed something in me, although at the time I felt nothing. I thought I would be stricken by how different she felt dead than alive. I wasn't. Now I find myself in a place of not being able to meditate or still my mind. This isn't what I thought it was. I got here the exact ass backwards way that I expected to. I can't do the "work" anymore. It's all play to me. Nature speaks to me in ways that it always has but now I'm free to hear it. Still, I feel a lot of guilt and "shoulds" over abandoning the practices. The nature of my job is a highly focused meditative/creative one. I don't know if I should just go straight into that, or really focus on spiritual "work". There's no difference anymore! It's all a state of mind/no mind I guess.
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mandyjw replied to George Fil's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Hmmm... It seems to me that this is an unfigureoutable problem. Or not a problem. One of those things. -
mandyjw replied to dharm4's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
2 The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, 3 but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’” 4 “You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. 5 “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” The first awakening. Eve beat Adam to the punch. -
mandyjw replied to dharm4's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
That is the very moment that I was always told that "free choice" was born. But the Devil also embodies free choice because he/she got sick of God and wanted to go it on his own. So God plants the tree in the garden, and tells them it's forbidden and the Devil comes to Eve and says it's a good idea to eat the fruit off of it. Then Adam gets to pretend that he was just a victim of that whole situation. But really, he created duality to BEGIN with because he complained to God that he was lonely and so God created Eve for him. SO ADAM out of his desire split himself into two and duality, male and female. Haha. I got your number Adam. -
@Beeman So you are entertained by the reactions, you don't act that way in order to provoke reactions for your entertainment? Is there a difference? I don't know.
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mandyjw replied to dharm4's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@cetus56 So when God told them not to eat from the tree in the first place, wouldn't that have been the moment they were truly kicked out of Eden? -
It's expressed differently, most of the time anyway. Men sometimes perceive women as having less ego because they aren't as familiar with how it is expressing itself, and they are less threatened by it.
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mandyjw replied to George Fil's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
This subject fascinates me. How does one maintain a serious practice without getting a spiritual ego of "doing" about it? -
@Serotoninluv
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As you admit in the title, you like doing it, it amuses you. Why is that?
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This is really interesting. We start out life unconscious but are blissful in it. Some people stay that way. Something throws us out of the Garden of Eden, maybe it's a realization, awakening, life changing event, realizing the emptiness of success or just maturity. It steals out innocence. Then we suffer until we learn to go back to the garden of eden by choice. After that we have access to both worlds, the world of thought and intelligence and the world of peace. We started out with no choice, then we were given choice but lost our happiness and in the end we learn to keep them both.
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mandyjw replied to Swagala's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Swagala Yes, that's why acceptance of the present moment is so important to this work, because everything is always changing and therefore what we are asked to accept is always changing too. -
@crog_wallz All his videos are his instructions. If you had discovered him a few years ago you were along for the ride. It's been a fun one.
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mandyjw replied to Swagala's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
Wanting to be content and not be seeking is a desire. Wanting to not have desires is a desire. It's ok to want to awaken as long as you know it's ok to want. -
mandyjw replied to dharm4's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@Leo Gura The devil is literally the angel of light. The Biblical Lucifer successfully embodies the duality of angel and devil him or herself. The snake in the garden of Eden convinced Eve to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and at that time humans set themselves apart from animals. But God planted the tree and he created the snake and he kicked them out of Paradise. Tell me, who is the villain in this story? -
People who usually value the type of intelligence that they have more than other kinds. People who have high IQs often look down on the more social butterfly type people and vice versa. It's just another function of the ego.
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@jbram2002 I've done that before with an intense feeling of rejection, it was a very memorable experience. It felt like fire.
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There is a point where bravely suffering pain becomes self flagellation and the ego tell itself that it is purifying itself because deep down it believes itself unworthy of experiencing pleasure. Wisdom is knowing is where that point is, and we usually don't find it until we self flagellate a little bit. It's all in good fun.
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I experienced death/love intensely when my Grandmother died. Love/fear is a dear friend too. Intense love and intense hate are only unbearable if you carry great resistance.
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You wouldn't have ever wanted me if you didn't secretly like pain. You just haven't figured out that the counterintuitive truth that embracing pain is far better than running from it.