Karmadhi

What do you want out of this pick up stuff? What is your goal? If it is sex with a lot of girls or even to casually date a lot of girls then avoid attaching to this one. If you want 1 great girl then keep her but i would also talk to others just to avoid screwing up with this one until it is clear u guys can be exclusive.

Yes but sex is not what i really want. I could use it as a tool to get to what i want, but i am not needy for sex. The mechanics are the same as if i was needy for sex? By results here it would mean a lot of girls wanting me to be their bf, if i gotta fuck them first then so be it.

How do you deal with love neediness rather than sex neediness. I do not care about sex much but i care a lot about a girl geniounly wanted to be with me, feeling desired, wanted etc.

Hello guys I have noticed a trend in myself that i would like to correct. Some background information: I tend to have the anxious attachment style (with a bit of secure but still the anxious has more weight), i would be around stage orange 2/3 and 1/3 green and on the achiever stage of the ego development with some pluralist elements on them. My personality is ISTJ/INFJ (not sure). I am naturally introverted but i have done A LOT of socializing on the last 8 years or so and improvement my social skills massively. I am very social but bit low energy, i still smile, make jokes, laugh etc so i am not serious per say. I am 23 years old and male. So the trend i notice is that whenever i get interested in a girl, especially a girl that i find potential in, i tend to get attached a bit fast. This becomes even more prevelant if the girl is also somewhat interested and i see that it could lead to something. I have little interests in casual hookups and even if i try to fuck a girl i do it with the end goal in mind of keeping her around. Sex is just the next step towards that. The isse of course with this attachement is not only that is basically unhealthy but it also hurts your chances with the girls a lot. I have being treated quite badly by these girls, treated like i did not exist and gotten barely any respect. It felt horrible every time. I do not want to feel like that anymore. How do i become more detached? Especially with girls i percieve to be great girls, rare girls that i do not meet often. By a great girl i mostly talk about personality. I find it much easier to find physically attractive girls (my physical standards are quite low naturally) compared to a girl with a personality that i really vibe with and like. I have noticed that the girls i did the best with were girls i barely cared about, those were the girls that were most attracted to me. I would like this to happen with girls i also like and am into a lot (both physically and emotionally). The weird thing is that even if i percieve a girl around my "level" ( i hate using that word, it is so orange but i have to in order to express myself clearly here), then i still get attached. It is not just with girls i percieve about myself like Leo often says "stealing sexual value" which is very true. I also feel it with girls that are around my percieved "level". This i find a bit weird. Maybe i am a bit arrogant and automatically percieve a girl to be great if i see her at my level since i subconsciously percieve myself to be great? Some of the things that make a girl great in my eyes are her feminine energy, sense of humour, swetness, knowledge, natural curiousity, interest in self development, spirituality, ambition, wisdom, positivity, integrity etc. I know some of you guys will tell me to date multiple girls at once. However there are 2 issues with that. First it is quite hard to find the time to date AND get those dates in the first place. Even if i magically got 3 dates a week, i just dont have the time for it. I am very busy with other things at the moment, i just want a nice girl in my life and nothing more than that. I barely care about sleeping with hot girls or having harems. Second, even if i had a rotation of girls i dated, i would just focus on that one girl of the rotation that i vibed with the most and barely care about the others. In the end i would not get what i really wanted anyway. So what practices, mindsets, exercises etc would you guys suggest me in order to basically be detached in this whole process. Detached in a healthy way ofc, not just closing your heart and becoming a robot. Thank you

I wanna be like my detached friends. They got basically not that much experience but they just dont care. I want to be like that. Makes life much easier. Any sources to learn that except Leo's video on it? I usually get attached with girls i percieve to be great, those are really really hard to find. I do not mind being alone at all. However i want to experience all of life and this domain is a big part of it. I do have those, no worries. Friends too!

This is exactly what i wanted to know. How to work on it internally. Any advice for it?

Most guys inherintely dont give a fuck, they dont do this. However lets assume im different and i need to do it. Issue is that i tend to get attached to great girls, not to girls in general. Most girls i dont care much tbh. So the solution is to try with girls i really like and get better in time? Where can i find such an abudance of high quality girls? What advice would you give me? I dont show it externally, it is internal especially after we meet. During the meeting i am not really attached, it is after that you start getting attached.

@Gili Trawangan Are you a girl? Look i did that and it did not work. All i got is a bunch of friendszones. Being flirty and shit came so not naturally to me i had to basically change a lot to make it more natural. Actually i was not interested in girls for 21 years and yes nothing happened to me suprise suprise!!!! All players see it this way, only girls dont. Which is why i asked u if u re a girl. Also where am i supposed to find a shit lot of girls? I dont get harassed on social media by girls like girs do with guys. Im nothing special looking either so my female attention is quite low.

Ok a few more things i should have added: I kinda ignored dating for the first 21 years of my life and made most of my progress in the last 2 years or so. I have plenty of friends (both guys and girls), i workout regularly (i am in pretty good shape), i have things i enjoy doing like hobbies etc. I tend to do self development (meditating every day, reading books, watching Leo's and other youtubers videos, introspecting) and overall i would say my life is pretty well put together if i ignore the female aspects. I also am striving on starting working so i do have a clear purpose and goal in my mind right now and motivated towards it. However in order to fully actualize myself i need to fill this gap on my maslow hierarchy of needs otherwise it will be a problem.

So for a girl to get an expensive dangerous surgery is ok if it makes her boobs better but for a guy it is "bad" if he wears some basic heels that makes him 2 inches taller. I doubt 2 inches will change his dating life but if you can improve slightly something you are insecure about then might as well do it. And i can assure you height for a guy is as important as boobs are for a girl. I know you will mention your pick up friends that get laid a lot even though they might be very short but also there are girls with very small or meh looking boobs that still get a shit lot of male attention and are considered super hot (most models). Also just like many girls dont care about a guy's height much, also i know guys that barely care about boobs (they care mostly ass and face). Lastly, maybe those 3 inches he will get from the shoes might push him to initially start approaching girls and develop some basic confidence. In time he might realize they are not that useful and stop using them. Just like a lot of guys start using canned routines at first because their social skills are horrible and once they get better they start using them. Same logic here.

Found this funny prank video on Youtube. Whoever says girls are stuck with the guys that approach them will probably change their minds after this video. Just look at how many numbers she got with just speaking chinese, some of the guys were good looking too. Insanly impressive. Wish i had that success ratio from a daygame approach session

Why dont you suggest surgery also for guys when they have physical insecurities but instead just tell them to love themselves as they are and to improve themselves. Bit double standardish or is it because you are a guy yourself?

May i ask, if you get attention from guys anyway why does it matter to you this boob thing? Looks only purpose is to get attraction of guys, if that is handled why care?

Not really. Most guys do not care. Some guys have a boob fetish but i can assure u most will not care. But if you are really insecure i know exercises can help you elevate it a bit.

Most guys would not care about your boobs at all. Plenty of girls have really small boobs and are still considered extremly attractive. You look quite nice from the picture so yeah do not worry about it Your boobs are such a small part of your overall physical appearance anyway.

Sometimes we simply dont have other options. I am 172 cm in a country where most girls, especially if include shoes (they love to wear elevator stuff) are like 175 cm. What am i supposed to do? Not talk to any of them? Maximum 15-20 percent of girls are legit shorter than me, most are either my height or slightly taller. The ones that are legit taller than me 5cm+ i do not try anything with. Stop looking at it from the pov of a tall guy, not all guys are tall.

May i ask then why you almost never see couples where the girl is 2 inches taller or more than the guy on the streets? It demotivates me a lot if like 99.9 percent of couples the women is not 2 inches or more taller than the man. Celebreties dont count ofc.

As long as there is not sexual attraction from either part then yes. I have really really good female friends that i love just as much as my guy friends. However guys make the mistake of being stuck in a friendship with a girl they like, that is a huge mistake which i have personally made in the past and it is not a good choice in my opinion. But if you started as just friends from the start, then super doable.

Either INTJ or ISTJ(not sure yet)

How to find wings???????????????????????????? RSD forums are shut down and there is basically barely any online forumn to find wings, let alone good wings.

Ok guys so i will give you a short report and a situation i have which i find really confusing. So i met this girl from a friend, we all went to do an activity together. We vibed a bit and talked and stuff but nothing crazy. We also touched hands a bit because of the nature of the activity but again, all relatively innocent stuff. Afterwards, i added her on instagram and we texted a bit back and forth, mostly replying to each other stories. After exams ended (we are university students), i told her to meet up and she happily agreed. We met up (just me and her) and we went on this bar in the center and sat on these chairs where u can touch the person but it is not really a couch. We spent there like 3 hours, talking about different things, making jokes, having fun etc. I paid the first round of drinks (a 0.33 litter beer (around 5% alcohol)) and she paid for the second round. Towards the last hour or so i started touching her hand and stuff and we got comfortable with touching each other hands. I would say i hit state during the last 45 minutes or so, i sexualized a bit and at one moment we were both holding hands and she did not remove it. At that moment i kissed her, a small make out. After that, she leaned on and she kissed me. She told me my lips were a bit rough because it is quite cold these days and said "next time you go out with a girl apply some product to make your lips softer". Afterwards we left, she said "that was fun" when we were leaving. Then i walked her to the train station (she lives in a nearby city) and went home. Considering this girl was quite pretty and cool i am very happy with myself that i had the balls to make the first move because usually i chickened out and this costed me like 4 girls so far. Now things get weird and bad. I reply to her story like 3 days after we meet and we text a bit, then i suggest to meet later on the week (sunday and this texting is on tuesday). She says she is busy that weekend but suggests to meet me next wendsday (so 1 week exactly from the moment this texting is happening). I agree and we pick a time and place. I do not really text her after because i was busy with my stuff and partially because i did not want to mess up anything with bad texts (i am not that good in texting atm). So today (wendsday) i go the place we arranged to meet but she is nowhere to be found. I text her "where are you" and 20 minutes later she tells me that she forgot and was sorry and shit. I got super pissed but refraimed myself for saying anything nasty, i just told her not to do it again and lets find a time again to meet and stick to it. She suggests friday after class and says she is also meeting some other friends. I get bit confused and tell her if we can meet on the weekend because on friday i am busy. She tells me okay but i am not sure yet and then says something weird to me. She asks me "if this is a friendly meeting because things got a bit weird towards the end of our previous meeting". I am like WTF to myslef, you legit kissed me, said it was fun and we even made jokes after when i walked you to your destination and now "it was weird"????????? I text her like "Is it really friendly tho" and "What was weird about last time" She says something like "yes very friendly" and "haha nevermind, beer in empty stomach i guess". I am really really confused with this shit. Most of my friends are not thatttt experienced with girls so i feel like asking here for advice because i really want some good advice. We talked for like 4 hours almost before i kissed her and it was mutual, she accepted it and even kissed me back. We did not even drink much, she never said she was tipsy or drunk and seemed perfectly mine to me. I am really confused. Any advice would help. Sorry for the super long thread but i wanted to give you guys a clear assesment of the situation.

I would say like half the guys are totally clueless about this stuff, they have not bothered learning it or improving it. Sure some are naturals but i doubt every single guy is.

I was being sarcastic because they are first to tell guys how to act but when someone does what they say and makes a thread needing help they cannot help him so they just ignore it . Just FYI because i forgot to mention, if i text a girl and she constantly takes multiple hour if not a full day to reply then personally i find it bit degrating to keep doing it when she is not putting any effort. If i did that to her you would prolly tell me its bad behaviour.

@K Ghoul @Etherial Cat Since you girls are so fond of giving opinions and advices how about giving me your 2 cents on the thread i made which should be in the first 5 that appear in this forumn sub-section. Would like to hear it.

If this is typical girl behaviour then i genuenlly do not understand how basically every guy has been in many relationships during his life. Have they all went through this shit?