longusername12345

I have taken the life purpose course, and have a clearer idea of what my life purpose is. The first step to achieving this purpose is research and embody all of the topics covered in actualized.org plus some. As you probably know, THERE ARE A SHITTON OF TOPICS. I do not know where to start. I keep finding one topic to focus and study and work with then another one sparks "my bliss" or whatever and I keep jumping from topic to topic. How do you know where the best place to start is? Or is it just a leap of faith?

What do you mean? I don't quite understand?

Yo my intuition has been telling me the EXACT same thing

My intuition is saying take a week detox from all success shit, no affirmations, no visualizations, none of that. Just pure spirituality research. But I'm afraid I'll lose alot of my progress. Is this fear valid? What's the best course of action?

What's the best way to quiet the mind? To be in the moment and not caught up in all the petty thoughts that fly by. What is required to achieve this state of mind?

While focusing on research, is it best to abandon all other practices until the year of research is done or can I for example combine daily practice of mindfulness meditation, affirmations, and visualizations with my study? I've done mindfulness meditation as a thirty day challenge (tho I will admit I didn't do it a couple days). What do you mean by rigorously? What would a rigorous mindfulness meditation practice look like?

FUCK. YES. So basically what you're saying is kriya yoga + work on success=yes do that? And is is possible to do something like kriya yoga consistently everyday while doing affirmations and visualizations everyday? Also there is a WHOLE LOT that can be done in this self actualization work. Concentration practice, developing humor techniques, vanilla meditation, visualizations, yoga, self inquiry, lots and lots of different meditation techniques, contemplation, the list goes on and on and on and on. So where the fuck to start? I'm drowning in all of this and I don't know what to focus on right now. Or how to balance multiple focuses at once.

This is something I've been struggling with too. You're definitely not alone. I've downloaded Cold Turkey Blocker on my desktop and that blocks all the distracting websites you want it to block. Pretty damn effective. I like it. Yet it still doesn't solve the low-attention span, I need dopemine more moree MOREEEEE problem. Leo has a YouTube video on focus that goes over a well-known technique that works pretty damn well for solving this: The technique is basically to set a timer for 1 hour to 1 1/2 hours and to pick ONE thing to do during that time. No fucking distractions. Find a way to eliminate all distractions during this set time. You're just focused on this one fucking thing. That's really important. Find what you want to do with your time. Have a direction. Have a directive. And I like to have fun with it. Like if I want to just goof off on social media, alright bitch, 1 hour of focused social media here I come. If I wanna watch a stupid show on netflix, 1 hour of focused netflix. If I have schoolwork that I want to do 1-2 hours of focused study. Then you do a 5-10 minute break (which I like to use centering myself, concentration practice, refill my water bottle, take a shit, take a step outside and breathe in that good ass prana or whatever, etc etc). Then repeat. You get the point. Get creative with this, it's really enjoyable if you let it be. The most productive people I know use this and get a whole lot of shit done. I have a friend who works multiple jobs, has a steady stream of passive income, does what he loves, gets to choose his schedule, and has plenty of free time who uses this technique in a slightly more hardcore way. He says set a timer for 2 1/2 hours and then take a 10-15 minute break. If you want to take a longer break, work 3 hours. EARN YOUR BREAK. These techniques are really effective but it all comes down to JUST DOING IT. Which is a lot harder than it sounds. And I have not figured that out yet. I struggle with finding the will to set that 2 1/2 hour timer but when I do, holy fuck, a whole new world of productivity opens up. But yeah, if you're in a dopemine rut, just find something else to do with your day and stick with it. Have a directive. Also find a way to eliminate all your distractions (social media, the forum, youtube, etc etc). There are plenty of useful resources and techniques for this sorta thing. Its simply a matter of doing the research and/or doing the techniques. Really fucking simple if you want it to be. And for your constant needing of dopemine, this is somerthing I know a lot less about. My guess is a 14 day meditation retreat would help. Take a week break from social media. Just take a long ass break from your dopemine supplier and focus on what you want to focus on. You could even spend a few hours just sitting. Not moving a muscle. I hate to throw another one of Leo's videos at you but this one is crazy helpful too: When I was on quarantine and had rona, I read like 20 books, did at least 100 hours of meditation, and watched and absorbed a shitton of content and got a shitton of perspective, developed a consistent workout habit, and found a kind of joy I never found before. All from doing these techniques.

I've been feeling... weird lately. And apparantly so have others. Maybe it's a global shift in consciousness? Maybe it's a personal shift? Maybe just fucking hormones? I've attached a few screenshots of a conversation I had with a friend about these feelings. And then someone else when shown these screenshots said: "Thats exactly how I feel I can never express it because its hard idk why but yeah. Its just a lot of exhaustion and no motivation to do anything and a lot of people try and push down what I'm going through as something not important because they feel what their going through is worse so I just try and say simple words so it doesn't seem like I'm trying to ask for pity. All im really trying to do right now is distract myself and ignore it but its hard because when I do all of what I'm feeling seems to come out in anger or even more sadness because I don't wanna acknowledge it." What is this phenomenon we're describing? Is there any explanation?

Dammmmn that's empowering. But for example, starting with Enlightenment and consciousness work versus starting with success and prdocutivity versus just switching between topics depending on the day and how I feel; like wouldnt these choices make drastic differences in the results of my work and studies?

https://youtu.be/9WEpb5t_CLw

I'm 15. Every weekend my cousin and I sneak out and do whatever the fuck. It's a good outlet and gives us a little mental freedom to know that our lives aren't entirely confined to what our parents let us do and dont do. Anyways, for the last three nights we went out, a really nice girl went with us. For the sake of anonymity, we'll name her Anne. She's a sweet, expressive, tender-hearted individual who has a shitty family life and poor mental health according to her (depression i think). But she is super sweet and loving to everybody so I always called her The Female Jesus. So for the last 3 nights, we hungout, danced, drank, drove around, had a good time with her. Then last night I made out with her then on the ride taking her home, I she crawled into the back seat with me, we made out, foreplay (kissing, touching, caressing, body, fingering, I ate her out, and then we took off our pants and when I went to stick it in, I couldn't fucking find it. It was a shitty position (me on top of her on the backseat like a sandwich), I had no condoms on me, no lube, and we were both drunk. It's like her pussy completely disapeared. I found it with my fingers and my mouth but I just could not find it with my dick. Then by the time I did (I think), I was soft as a pillow. I looked up horrified but she had her eyes closed like she was in a blisssful or at least calm state so I went back to work. Still failed. So I was fumbling around trying to figure out what the fuck I do now and then she said "we're at my house" and we were so she left and hugged us goodbye and looked rlly sad. I texted her the next morning ("Morningg how are you feeling?") and she left me on opened. Haven't heard from her since. Maybe I'll see her next weekend and there'll be closure? Maybe we'll try again with a condom haha and on a bed instead of the back seat of a car? Hopefully but the way she's been ignoring me, I'm starting to doubt it. So what happened? What did I do wrong? What did I do right? And what is the right thing to do next? And what can I learn from this? This was a new experience for me and it fucking confused me. I've never had these problems I had before. I asked a few friends about it (that I sortof trust) and one said "sex before marriage is a sin, just don't do it. this will fuck her up mentally" and ignored my questions completely. Another one said "well no shit she was sad, you tried to fuck her condomless in the back of a car". And my cousin was just proud I got pussy. Although they all had semi-good points, I don't feel completely satisfied with either of those answers. What should my next course of action be?

Shittttt, is there any way to get her sexually attracted again? I mean in a sense, yes, she lost her virginity at age 12 to an 18 year old and fucked a few more dudes in that age range, all without condoms. Slut is often a derogatory term. She's not less of a person for sure but she is one experienced motherfucker and I do not know what diseases I got haha. She's a sweet person though. Always loving to everybody. But often acts from a sense of obligation.

I don't know your situation but this website has a lot of useful shit: https://www.goodlookingloser.com/laid/online-dating/lose-your-virginity Research emotional mastery FOR SURE. Do a shitton of research on that. Meditate consistently Watch Leo's Sex videos Read books on relationships, sex, social situations, etc etc (if you can, buy the booklist) Also take responsibility for your life (be willing to do your very best to change your shitty situations), and half a fucking blast doing it. And take action. Fuck up. Laugh. Cry. Fuck up some more. And keep learning. Never stop learning. Obviously I'm not the absolute best source of advice but I'm almost 100% positive if you do these things a lot of your problems can be solved.

So in this case, half fucking her in the back of a car made her feel slutty? The best course of action would've been to choose a better location, have two condoms, and stay the night with her?

What do I do with this information??

So..... never bring it up with her again?

This morning I sent her "hey, are you ok?" then a friend came over and sent her what he thought I should send but I deleted that. So she has 2 unopened messages from me, a "hey are you ok?" and a deleted message. Nonchalant is kindof out of the window. Is ignoring her for a couple days the move then? How do I recover from the previous texts I sent?

Is there anything I can text her to make her likely to come with my cousin and I next time we sneak out? goddammit hahaha that night couldve been so much worse tho

ahhhhh how do I cope with the error though? Lots of meditation? Is there anyway to see her again or should I forget about it?

ahahaha love how you worded that. how do I maintain this strong arousal? What do you mean 'poke intuitively'?

How do I master logistics? ahahahahahaha yes never again How do I develop proper education and experience? And do I text her or talk to her in person? And what happened with you?

Ima fucking remeber these next time a) what's the proper location? c) why was she sad?

Finished the 9th pass on the value assessment and he said to release all negatively motivated values 50% or over. I do not have any of those. Do I still watch the trauma release excercise for releasing negative values or do I skip it?