Thorsten Fuzzi

@Vercingetorix Hello my friend (and everyone else )! I'd love to hear your perspective on the following: Today I recieved a download from consciousness: The primary and universal purpose of my life is enlightenment, by which I mean literally becoming a light in this world and achieving the quantum leap of Self-realization somewhere on the way, the secondary and indivudual purpose of my life is to give a voice to consciousness. This is my mission. The two best instruments available to me are my podcast and work as an anthropologist. The latter necessarily, but ideally both of them involve a lot of travelling and extensive periods of solitud. If I am true to my life purpose, I will never ever except a partner that does not want or is not able to do that with me. So if Emily was not pregnant, I knew exactly where to direct my energy and what to do with my life. I would leave her immediatly and follow my bliss. But as a matter of fact she is. And I love my daughter in a way I have not loved before. I'd love to be able to leave her but I think it's impossible. Yes, it was Emily's choice, but it is not my daughter's fault to be born under such circumstances. I don't want her to have to grow up without a dad, little money, and in a developing country. To live my life purpose in such a way would be heaven on earth, but it seems almost incompatible with raising a child. Nonetheless, there maybe are ways to compromise in a way that is benificial to everyone, I just can't find one yet. What is really no option for me, is to half-ass fathering. It's hard to imagine how to be a dependable and strong father figure for this little person, but then only being there e.g. half of the year. Due to the mother bringing nothing material on the table it would be financially extremly challenging too. Maybe you can share some thoughts on the situation. I'd appreciate it a lot! Much love!

@Byun Sean What incredible syncronicity! I did ask myself that the first time yesterday. Thank you!

@Vercingetorix Second, it sounds like you did a really good job helping and evolving your girlfriend. Although all of her stage red behaviours are hard to stomach, it seems she is a unique person, and has the desire to evolve and can be in the long term a good partner and parent - is this the way you feel about it or not? It's hard to say. If I wouldn't be connected to her in that way, I would not keep up with it anymore. Why should I? Her center of gravity is rather green, but she has strong red cultural conditioning that has been very destructive from time to time. Nonetheless, the growth she went trough in just two years is remarkable and something I've never seen in people that had a overly safe, european upbringing. So that gives me a lot of hope, but in the end I really don't know. And if you realize that your LP can't be achieved while raising your daughter - well - parenthood only last for so long, after maybe 14-18 years you will become relatively free again. So you might have to wait for a little while and start your Life Purpose at age 35-40, Which is still pretty young and you will have a Daughter which is amazing. You are one bautiful soul my friend. Thank you so much for leading my awareness on the possibilty of embodying my life purpose while having a the joy of a grown up daughter! I literally cried a tear of relief reading this.

@Potato People King So, undergo a paternity test. She might want to talk you out of it, but persist and go for it. Of course I will. She also agreed to do so. Also to impregnate a woman is not usually so easy, many couples try hard for a long time to get pregnant! Well, it doesn't seem to be for me haha. But seriously, thanks a lot for your down-to-earth and compassionate advice. I will take it to heart!

@Preety_India Thank you for your advice and wishes!

@Preety_India But you need to realize the irresponsibility in a situation where you weren't sure if you wanted the woman in your life and now a child is on the way.. As I wrote, she literally got raped. Who cares about relationship stuff in such a moment. I just wanted to be there for someone I love, no matter if we're togehter or she's just a friend. I could not leave her in such a moment.

@Akemrelax Your focus is so split I don't see how you can properly do even one of these things. That's very true. I think your daughter is a sign from the universe to anchor your life. Prioritize doing important things. That's wonderful. I was feeling that too. Thanks a lot for your beautiful advice!