There's nothing wrong with making a living for yourself, although at some point you must make a major decision, multiple actually, as your dream won't fly until you give it wings to soar with. Your thoughts are your reality, and your reality is a result of your actions; you must remember that your karma is a result of what you really wanted in life, even if you do not actively make the choice.
So to deny your feelings of what you think you need in life is the same as to not be alive at all, as it's you not being able to use your ability as a living experience. It's contradictory, living a peaceful life while in a constant state of fear of disrupting it.