xxxx

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Everything posted by xxxx

  1. Can happen if both the parties have an avoidant kind of attachment style. You can love someone a lot, and still not want to be with them. There is mutual understanding involved here, arising from similar ways of thinking about things. @Lyubov
  2. I was watching one of Leo's videos, where he told that everything is imaginary. I was close to understanding that, then I hit a road-block. 1) I was watching the video in my room, while my brother was doing the same in his room. I was beginning to realize that I am God, and that he is my imagination; he realized the same and came to a similar conclusion. How can I be the imagination and the one imagining? Who is imagining whom? For him, he is very real, and it's the same for me. 2) How can imaginary also be so tangible? Example: The ferocious dog is imaginary, and then I touch the imaginary dog, and it bites me. I have a deep wound on my leg. My leg is also imaginary. I feel the pain, though. There are tears - imaginary, as well. They feel like distinct episodes. How can I put it all into one coherent idea of imagination? Is it even possible to be that aware in everyday life? I am not going to sit there laughing, right? - "Look, hahaha, an imaginary dog bit me and there's this random liquid oozing out of my body, but this liquid, color and the body is imaginary, and this sensation, which feels so real is also imaginary - fantastic." Well right now, my mind is, uh, to put it in the most eloquent sense - majestically fucked. I appreciate your insights.
  3. @Striving for more, You do not have to listen to people. I am a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) myself, and I know what you are talking about - the slightest things can be harsh on people like us. This world is already too full of judgmental, hurtful people, and it is not your fault that they behave in such a manner. It is their own issue, and nothing to do with you. I have developed a mechanism myself - I never give myself emotionally to any person until I have assessed their nature completely. When you realize that the world out their has their own issues to deal with, you turn inward. This is the best place to be - for you are your own knight in shining armor. As cheesy as it sounds, it is true. You can achieve what ever you wish to, and people who tell you otherwise have already limited themselves. To have true belief in someone needs having that sense of belief in yourself, first - and you should not seek encouragement from people who themselves do not know what constitutes them intrinsically as an individual. They are perhaps too scared to taste this idealism and sense of trust, because the world has told them time and again that it is wrong to dream. See, it works like this - the Ivan Pavlov/ classical conditioning effect, maybe? When you are young, and you dream high, and the society brings you down, and hits you emotionally, mentally and sometimes physically - and keeps doing this again, and again - and ties you around in those traps - financial, familial, etc. - people start to believe that this ruthlessness is the reality, and they start associating idealism with something dangerous. Society does that to them. Soon, they become a part of the same society that shuns others, and the domino effect continues. You have a choice. Believe me when I tell you that I have met different kinds of individuals - people who hurt you, competitive people, genuine haters, and while it was very difficult to come to terms with their attitude, I learnt certain imperative lessons. I could not, and still do not know how and why people behave in such a manner - discouragement, hate, spiteful behavior. I choose to overlook now. It is a conscious choice. Do not give them any space in your mind. It's a waste of your time and energy. I have learnt this after a lot of tears, haha, believe me. Still, do not let this hurt turn you into them. That is what this society wants, and prove them wrong. Most of the people who have given great value to the world have not been the ones grounded in pure realism; they have been idealists, shunning the norm, and showing people that the impossible exists. The people that I know who have great capacity to help others are firstly secure in themselves. Of course, you can have all of those things that you mentioned. You can become an entrepreneur - but beware of the voices around you. The moment you realize that someone doesn't give good energy, scoot. You do not have to prove anything to anyone - even your parents. There are and always will be people who achieve a lot in this world - they just do not associate themselves with people who put them down. Put your energy in finding that one person, maybe, and you will never need any one else. Before that, become that individual yourself. Also, if you are doing it already, stop with the victim mentality, People WILL NOT understand you, and you SHOULD NOT expect this from them. You have to become your own cheerleader. It is very difficult, and there will be many, many heartbreaks along the way, but you will then truly learn what courage actually is. It takes courage to love. If you aren't getting it from the world, become the source yourself. Never behave with others in the same way they behave with you. LOVE THEM. Love so hard that they are forced to seek that love in themselves. Be so good that they can't ignore you. YOU CAN DO IT, AND WHILE I MAY NOT KNOW YOU, I GENUINELY BELIEVE IN YOU. COME ON, @Striving for more, SHOW IT TO THE DAMN FUCKING WORLD WHAT YOU ARE CAPABLE OF. YOU ARE FUCKING GOD.
  4. The Music of the Night - The Phantom of the Opera - Andrew Lloyd Webber
  5. If someone can't love me enough to heat the water like this, I don't want them in my life. P.S. Sweet story!
  6. I'd suggest you go to the root of this feeling. Do not try to escape it. Do you think there was some catalyst? I do not know your situation fully to recommend a particular book, but whenever I want to feel light, I read some P.G. Wodehouse. I highly recommend it - it puts a smile on my face every single time. Start with the Jeeves collection, maybe? Watch a good movie. Some of my favorite ones to watch during such times are The Lion King, The Bucket List, Into the Wild -the right mix of emotions. Exercise. . You just need the DOSE - Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin and Endorphins - your happy brain state would get activated, then. "How to Increase Dopamine Levels Naturally meditate regularly (increases dopamine by 65%) make a daily to-do list & long term goals (each time you tick off a task or goal you increase dopamine levels) eat foods that are rich in L-Tyrosine (avocados, fish, eggs, cheese, banana, and pumpkin seeds) exercise regularly (whichever form of exercise you enjoy the most will give you the most increase in dopamine levels) create something such as writing, music, art & crafts (“if I create something, I am also creating dopamine”) How to Increase Oxytocin Levels Naturally physical touch, cuddling, hugging, making eye contact, and even shaking hands socializing (connecting or talking with friends and family reduces cortisol and stimulates your vagus nerve) touching your pet (research shows it lowers blood pressure) getting a massage (reduces stress hormones) acupuncture (elevates oxytocin concentrations) listening to music (has a calming effect on the brain, slow-tempo music has also been shown to increase oxytocin) exercise (stimulates the vagus nerve) cold showers (stimulates the vagus nerve) meditate How to Increase Serotonin Levels Naturally exercise (increases serotonin and dopamine, but also helps balance them) cold showers (2-3 mins of cold showers can be unpleasant but offers great benefits that have longer-lasting effects than compared to caffeine) sunshine (10-15 minutes of sunlight a day can increase serotonin and vitamin D) eating foods such as banana, eggs, omega-3 fish, nuts and seeds, leafy greens, and probiotics getting a massage (increases serotonin and decreases cortisol) How to Increase Endorphin Levels Naturally laughter and crying creating music or art eating dark chocolate and spicy foods exercise or stretching high-intensity interval training getting a massage meditate " . An article on this - https://www.healthline.com/health/happy-hormone#massage . Best wishes!
  7. I really hope and pray that this is figurative language, with some deep philosophical meaning, that I am currently unable to understand.
  8. @Tim R Attend and participate actively in good conferences, seminars, summits, etc. I also suggest you attend webinars and make acquaintance with people you find interesting - then you can establish a rapport through emails, casual meet-ups and dinners.
  9. Say - John Mayer
  10. @Preety_India, Hey there, honey! I am sorry that you are feeling this way, and while I know that I can't imagine how painful this is for you, I shall try my best to understand this situation. First Preety, you have to remember that this is NOT your fault. This has NOTHING to do with you. The person in question over here is his own individual, with his own set of conditioning and traumas. Whatever he is doing is a reflection of HIS personality. I have a friend who went through a similar situation - this boy cheated on her, and it was the first time she was cheated on, too - she was in immense emotional and physical pain. It was very difficult, I remember - especially because she had to see him every single day, since they were classmates. They had many projects to work on together, and it was just impossible for her to escape his physical presence. She did overcome it, though - without a therapist. What she did was she stripped away the power she had given to the individual. Slowly, she realized that what he did was a reflection of his existence as a SEPERATE individual. Her other boyfriends had not treated her this bad, and she came to the conclusion that this one individual is not going to determine her worth. Think of it like this, Preety - Say, we both meet. I hate chocolates, because early in my childhood I had a bad physical reaction after eating them. You, however, love chocolates. Would it be your fault if I berate you for liking chocolates? Would you take it upon yourself that you had a good experience with chocolates during your childhood, while I didn't? See, there's always an environment around us - and we see that our relationship with each one is different. Your current boyfriend treats you so well - you actually did mention that he is your soulmate - why don't you look at yourself through his eyes? He sees no fault in you. He loves you for who you are as an individual. This is a reflection of HIS personality. How you treat others is a reflection of YOUR personality. Have no regrets, Preety, because in your capacity, you never did anyone any harm - instead your bestowed them with your true love. Not everyone we meet is going to complete our puzzle, and that IS OKAY - because there's way too many pieces. Each individual we meet is just a single piece - that's it - nothing more. ALSO REMEMBER, YOU ARE NOT A REHABILITATION CENTRE FOR OTHERS. Why should you feel that your sense of self has more to do with them than with you? We limit ourselves like this; we believe ourselves to whoever they say we are, overthrowing our minds , and we end up settling for a position in this false reality as if we have nothing to offer to ourselves. What I'm trying to tell you is that what who you are isn't owned by anyone, nor controlled or even slightly understood, so don't give your mind to others for their profit, while you sit drugged by the belief that this all that there is to your life. No one can hurt you as much as YOU, and no one can save you from yourself but YOU. Tell this to yourself - The 'I' that is feeling so miserable because it hates what the world is doing to them, never truly existed to begin with - it's liberating, believe me. I wish you the best of health, love. Take care.
  11. @Leo Gura, I get what you are saying - and I have one more question: What about human expression through the means of procreation? Where would we fit that? Isn't procreation somewhere linked to the human desire for symbolic immortality, based on a myriad of emotions? How would an enlightened person look at this? Why do most traversing the path towards enlightenment abstain from this - monks, etc.?
  12. No New Friends - LSD . Thunderclouds - LSD . Mountains - LSD . Genius - LSD . Audio - LSD
  13. Someone please show this to Leonardo DiCaprio.
  14. For that, she needs to be aware first. How would he react if she were to interact with young guys? What if she acts in a child-like manner - would he get annoyed? Does he act in an authoritative manner around her, just because he is older to her? You can look at a lot of things - and believe me, it’s easier, too - given this age difference. There’s some well-defined territories here, that can be used as a means for assessment. Also, to truly get to know any individual- no matter what the age- takes time. There’s going to be an investment of time and energy, and we cannot deny that. The only thing I would advice is - stay close to her, talk to her about it, and do the impersonal assessment yourself. Your sister is going to be invested, and people in relationships overlook these things and give too many chances. To be very honest, you got to be her rock. @BornToBoil
  15. I’m 24, and I wouldn’t mind dating a 44 year old guy, in case he is genuinely my ‘dream’ guy. Not saying I have, but I wouldn’t miss a good opportunity just because of an age difference. If the man is an overall - is confident in his skin, shares similar values, is trustworthy, treats you in a very respectable manner, is committed in every aspect of his life, an intellectual, emotionally stable person who doesn’t derive his sense of worth from another - especially dating a ‘young’ girl, I wouldn’t, personally, look too much into the age factor. Nonetheless, in this situation of yours - it’s him lying about his age that needs to be looked into more seriously, in my opinion. Doesn’t that show an insecure individual? No one truly confident in their own skin and aware of their self-worth would lie about such a thing. That’s definitely a red flag. @BornToBoil
  16. Home is such a lonely place - blink-182
  17. As someone who LOVED Perry the Platypus as a kid, I can assuredly tell you that my childhood has been effectively ruined. Thank you.
  18. I Will be Found (Lost at Sea) - John Mayer
  19. I found this question interesting. I do not claim to know the answer to these questions, but this what I seem to think of it, with my limited understanding of things - do correct me if I am not on the right track. I am sorry if this seems way too cluttered. I am still trying to figure things out - and have not developed the art of putting these 'abstract' thoughts out into pellucid, terse sentences. . To think about the 'purpose' of anything is where the entire confusion lies, right? Can we know the 'true' purpose of anything, at all? For example - The star-nosed mole doesn't let virtual blindness stop it from getting fast food. The animal uses the tendrils of its snout to probe the surrounding area and navigate through the dark. The tendrils can target 13 different spots a second, allowing the mole to quickly scoop up any snack it happens upon. So here, I would like to ask - why do we not have these tendrils? Why hasn't the infinite bestowed us with these tendrils? Is it because we have 'eyes'? Is there any meaning to sight, at all? Is it necessary for existence? What 'reality' does 'it' want us to 'see'? Is it 'feeling' through seeing, hearing, touching - does reality just want to be 'felt'? Can we 'feel' reality without these 'senses'? The mountains, oceans are a part of the same infinite reality - but do they 'feel' anything? Do they 'exist', because we can 'see' them, or would they exist anyway, irrespective of anything? Do mountains 'sense' you when you walk on them, or do the oceans 'sense' you when you swim in it? . Another example, among the billions of unique ones - the naked mole rat that comes equipped with eyes, but they're more of a decorative organ. Does it 'look at' the 'material world' the same way we do? . Then, there is the ‘biologically immortal’: the jellyfish Turritopsis dohrnii. These small, transparent animals hang out in oceans around the world and can turn back time by reverting to an earlier stage of their life cycle. Is the infinite 'favoring' these organisms over us? Why does this jellyfish get to experience biological immortality, where as, we 'mere mortal beings' cannot? Does it have any greater 'purpose' than us? We die, yet they exist - are we 'sensing' things, or are they 'sensing' things throughout? Do they 'perceive' the 'material world', or do they just dwell in the immaterial emptiness? . Also, not so much the 5 senses, but - We used to have a tail, but because we didn't use it, we evolved into what we are right now - humans with no tails - what was the 'purpose' of that tail? Other mammals find their tails useful for balance, but when humans learned to walk, the tail became useless and evolution converted it to just some fused vertebrae we call a coccyx - human vestigiality. . Just a thought - -if humans were to be in conditions where their eyes would be of no use - would they lose the ability to see? We would perhaps exist, yes - but would we be truly 'alive' without these senses, if we are unable to properly 'look out there'? Would it turn into - what does reality want us to "hear" out there? -if humans were all deaf - would we lose the ability to speak? Then maybe, our perception would be limited to what we should 'look out there'? -if we were deaf and blind, would our reality be based on 'what we could touch out there?' . So, if 'everything is just consciousness' - does it solely depend on anyone or anything's ability to make 'sense' of it, by giving it the desired meaning, or is it just as good without. . Is it a 'song' or just some sound we have given meaning to because that is all we know? The human range is commonly given as 20 to 20,000 Hz -but why do we not call every sound music? Is it just 'taste' or that we have learnt the best ways to adapt to life, with it being rooted deep in individual survival? Where sweet food was used to discern safe food, and bitter as poisonous food? So many organisms have died due to these 'experiments' of the infinite - did 'it' not want them to look at, hear or touch the material world the same way that those who were lucky to live got to do? Why did the things 'it' wanted them to go through be their end to it their limited existence? There's still so many frequencies we cannot understand, and our limited senses cannot easily perceive - so does 'it' want to be looked at only through those limited senses - is our brain capable of only this much 'magic'? So, is the immaterial emptiness trying hard to be understood - or is just being, unconcerned with anything? @Twega
  20. At 0:34, they felt it.
  21. Carl Jung on dreams: “Dreams are impartial, spontaneous products of the unconscious psyche, outside the control of the will. They are pure nature; they show us the unvarnished, natural truth, and are therefore fitted, as nothing else is, to give us back an attitude that accords with our basic human nature when our consciousness has strayed too far from its foundations and run into an impasse.” “I have noticed that dreams are as simple or as complicated as the dreamer is himself, only they are always a little bit ahead of the dreamer’s consciousness. I do not understand my own dreams any better than any of you, for they are always somewhat beyond my grasp and I have the same trouble with them as anyone who knows nothing about dream interpretation. Knowledge is no advantage when it is a matter of one’s own dreams.” “They do not deceive, they do not lie, they do not distort or disguise. They are invariably seeking to express something that the ego does not know and does not understand.” Link: https://www.thesap.org.uk/resources/articles-on-jungian-psychology-2/carl-gustav-jung/dreams/#:~:text=Jung saw dreams as the,process that he called individuation.
  22. A quote by Bob Marley that defines it all. This, to me, is an attractive person. “Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colors seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.” P.S Also, Physique-wise - Josh Duhamel
  23. Hahaha! . Also, yeah Connor - I wouldn't mind a hot, young, spiritual guy, with cute teeth, defined cheekbones and a sharp jawline on this forum.
  24. I Lost Something in the Hills - Sibylle Baier . Apocalypse - Cigarettes after Sex . Back to Black - Amy Winehouse . The Greatest (Sad Version) - Sia . Summertime Sadness - Lana Del Rey