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Treat Google like a guide. Every place the human mind has ever gone to, every minutiae of existence and the lack of it can be found on Google. An exemplar of this: Reading a book is like conversing with another human; the human who has written a book has spent a considerable time of their life putting their thoughts into it, through research, practice, contemplation, or any other means. So, it is like living the life of another human in a couple of hours/days. Now imagine, every thought that has come into our life has been spoken about by another person, or at least on those lines. Now imagine how many people have been on Earth, and how they have expressed themselves. Still, there are many things that we, in our limited capacities, have not stumbled across. Still though, we have at least some speculative data. So, now let us put this together: Everything known, everything vague, everything speculated is on Google. Google is an extension of you, and you are yet to realize that. Moreover, every new thing is added by the second. So, basically Google is the human-meta that there is for the most expansive knowledge there is, or perhaps ever will be. . So, how do you go about it? The answer is simple ---how do you go about life? That is the manner. Lead the kind of life you have imagined for yourself, and make Google your guide in that process. Google is there to help you, and you are there to help Google. Google will contribute to you, and you in turn, through your life will contribute to Google. @LeoX8

I discovered this about a year ago, but this has been one of the best things I have come across. It has been immensely helpful, and so much fun. It gives you an idea regarding a subject in a concise and clear manner, and thereafter, you can delve much deeper according to your interest. It is called Very Short Introductions, a book series published by the Oxford University Press. This is definitely a worthwhile investment. "Oxford's Very Short Introductions series offers concise and original introductions to a wide range of subjects — from Islam to Sociology, Politics to Classics, and Literary Theory to History. Not simply a textbook of definitions, each volume provides trenchant and provocative - yet always balanced - discussions of the central issues in a given topic. Our expert authors combine facts, analysis, new ideas, and enthusiasm to make often challenging topics highly readable. Whatever the area of study, whatever the topic that fascinates the reader, the series has a handy and affordable guide that will likely prove indispensable." I have also attached the topics and the authors for your reference. It is on Microsoft Excel. (Saved as AVSI Titles) The link of the website if you want to check it out: https://www.veryshortintroductions.com/ AVSI Titles.xlsx

Being moody is a nice thing, unless it is interfering negatively with your life, or any one else's. The range of emotions that you have described is pretty normal. Every emotion that we go through has some significance, and if we are really conscious about it --- we can discover different aspects of who we are. A few imperative things, though: First, only let in thoughtful people into your life, that do not put you down for feeling this way, or berate you for behaving in such a manner. Second, while there is no 'solution' per se, create a routine around these distinct emotions --- playlists, movies, strenuous physical training, meditation, calm walks, good food. Third, get to know the root of it sometimes, as well. For example, we may get triggered by words and actions of other people; at this time, sit with this thought, and analyze how much your environment is affecting your mood. I know, the slightest of things affect one's moods --- say, dark, gloomy days make me the happiest, sunny days make me feel sad (haha). Our environment is a very big contributing factor, but sometimes, there is a need for an assessment : are we livid because someone has hurt our ego, or are we sad that somebody did not treat us very well, etc. -- at this point, we need to step aside and see where we are in that spectrum. Moreover, we have to work towards not being a fragile dependent variable that easily sways with every little change in our environment -- especially the one that concerns other human beings. A bit of of detachment and awareness needs to be cultivated, hence. Other than that, eat that ice cream, binge on that show, go on those walks, and embrace yourself, because, why not? @intotheblack

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Sue Johnson. It's a very good book on relationships, albeit it has a rather cheesy title. It deals with the application of attachment theory to adult romantic relationships. You will definitely find answers to the questions you have posed. . https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/2153780.Hold_Me_Tight Check this link out to read reviews written by other people, too. Best wishes,

Questions: 1) What does unconditional love look like towards the people we love? 2) What does unconditional love look like towards strangers/ those who have hurt us / others in that similar bracket? 3) Boundaries and unconditional love — the much-needed balance. Your thoughts? 4) What is your experience with such a beautiful phenomenon, and how does it get incorporated and manifested in your daily life? Edit: P.S. I know, some of y’all would tell that unconditional knows no boundaries, etc. However, I want to know how you practice this kind of all-encompassing love, in this materialistic world.

Thank you for your answer, @Tim Ho Your reply did get me thinking about the idea of the categorization of anything. We all usually end up over-emphasizing the categories that we think are similar, and under-emphasizing the categories we think to be different. I, inadvertently, put my first two questions in entirely two different categories, forgetting how thin that line can be. We can love some one a lot, and still, they may be the ones that are hurting us the most. So, perhaps, at that particular moment, my love, too, cannot be put into certain boxes through which I could pick and choose, accordingly. Similarly, the concept of a stranger is also dubious; I may have known someone all my life, and love them, and they would have never heard of me; or they would have known me, and I would have no idea about them --- and then where would I place them in my set of questions? I am still exploring this idea of categorization. I have some questions for you that I shall be happy if you, or anyone else could answer - (Here, I am not talking about the kind of all-encompassing infinite love that unconditionally loves hate, accepts disgust with pure joy, lives through every bit of pain inflicted in an effervescent manner, and dances to the tunes of egoic love that is just one of its infinite components. I am talking about, as I mentioned in my question, the aspects of this all-encompassing unconditional love that we can practice in this material world that does not have the same kind of big picture outlook towards hate, disgust and pain like most of us on this forum do, perhaps.) 1) When you add variables such as culture, education, age, family status and the like --- do you mean to tell that ascending the ladder in terms of these variables has a positive relationship with something like unconditional love, or vice-versa? You told that they act different. I would like to know how different, and are we sure that these are good indicators for a reasonable assessment? If we take an example of an economically poor mother that loves her child -- the mother would, keeping other factors like culture, family status, and the like aside, anyway provide unconditional support to her child --- in the same manner that a mother from a billion dollar household may also do if she really does love her child. People from extremely poor households that are anti-social elements in the society, may give their only piece of bread to a beggar down the road. There are people from rich households that do a lot of charitable work, and may be cruel to their house-help. There may be poor people who work for gangsters that give away their kidneys to their loved ones because they want them to survive. There may be rich people who work for the biggest of charities, but may be waiting for their family members to die so that they might get a part of their will. So, how do I do a reasonable assessment? I am torn. 2) Inside the periphery of this dual, limited existence, where does the concept of justice play a part? Now, people on the forum talk about devilry and devilish activities, and how it has consequences, etc. While they may be aware of this infinite love, they are still talking about this from a worldly perspective, where there are certain rights and wrongs. If I invade anyone's private territory and snatch away all their belongings needed to survive, I have done a wrong, according to a consensus. I think people on this forum would agree with that. This act will be called devilish. There is a clear moral conduct in place in this dual, human existence. So, how can a person who is endeavoring this path towards understanding unconditional love act towards those who do something morally outrageous on the societally accepted principles? While I may know that it is all stemming from his idea of love, where would I place him in this social system of justice? As a person X trying to walk the path of spirituality, I might understand, but, say, as a lawyer or a judge, what do I do? What if there is a dissonance? Should I look at giving the person a death sentence as Love? Or should I give that person a life imprisonment and know it is all Love? Or, should I let a person walk away and let them kill more people ---as killing one or killing millions in the infinity, equals to killing no one, and it is all Love? 3) And from the second question stems the third one --- where I would want to know about the boundaries that I need to have to make the requisite distinctions, if there are any. . I hope this does not seem too cluttered. Do let me know.

@Keyhole I’m glad. Thank you. That was a sweet message!

@Forestluv I’m glad! Also, not to stray too far away from the topic, but I’d like to recommend the British TV mini-series - ‘The Honourable Woman.’ This is very relevant to this thread, I think. It portrays the interwoven complexity of trauma, politics, loss, hope, displacement, peace, emotions, monstrosity, and vengeance in a very beautiful way. It is about 7-8 episodes. Please watch it!

I have been feeling emotionally numb, lately. There’s no other word I can use to describe this state. No, there’s nothing wrong or shocking that has happened in my life. Still, I feel this. Sometimes, I feel a sudden void pervade and percolate in my chest and I feel like crying, and then I am numb to tears, as well. I do not know why, though. I do not know what triggers this. I do not understand what the root of this problem might be. I do not know if I am blocking my emotions, or if this is just me logically assessing everything, and then, not letting my otherwise vulnerable emotions flood into the domains of everyday life. I am an emotional person. I am very empathetic. Hence, this numbness is confusing me. I just want to ask if this is normal.

I shall definitely look into certain mental/physical exercises. Will try yoga, to see if helps. My diet is pretty healthy, so I do not think that it is the case. Nevertheless, I will delve deeper into this issue. Thank you, @neutralempty

You are kind. Thank you for the wishes! A question: How did you turn your vulnerabilities into weapons? @neutralempty

Mild? The kind of exchange that I am talking about is an open-minded one. Of course, there needs to be an exchange, but the exchange should be freeing, with a desire to navigate through the myriad territories and folds of life for the pure joy of it, in this finite time of humanness; wherein the only condition is that the person shouldn’t use something you are very vulnerable about as a weapon that may end up hurting you. I mean, I am not rushing for it. Let time take its turn. If the universe did want to bless me with something of this sort, I’d be very happy. I will build myself first, holistically; then, I’ll see how things play out. I do not expect much from people, anyway. Still, in all honesty, I am yet to reach the stage where I expect nothing. I am happy for you that you’ve reached that stage. P.S. Uhm, I’ll make myself clear — I do not want to be vulnerable in any kind of a relationship that has material transactions attached. I would not disregard anyone outwardly, but I would not try to integrate myself with them emotionally, as well. @neutralempty

No, I do not restrain my emotions for the sake of keeping up a superficial image. It is just that my self-preservation instinct is very strong. I am super intuitive, and I pick up on emotions very quick. People share themselves a lot with me, and every time I talk to people, I begin to understand that at the deepest core, most people are very transactional, and hence, I keep them at a distance from my emotions. I want an understanding that has no transactions attached to it — emotional or otherwise — I will find it some day, but today is just not the day, haha! Also, you are so cute. That video of that bat was sweet! I will forever associate you with that image of the bat, hahaha! @neutralempty

What does spirit dimension stuff mean? Why did you call it a lesson? Yes, music sure does help. I listen to some Gregory Alan Isakov. You should definitely check him out. I love his album, ‘This Empty Northern Hemisphere.’ It’s calming. Also, about talking to people — I do not know how to verbalise it, and do not know if people would comprehend the nature and intensity. I do not express my intrinsic emotions to others. I have a problem being vulnerable with others. It has been like this for the longest time. I mean, that’s not an issue, I think. I cope with things myself — always have. No, I do not know an advanced empath. How do you cope with it? From when have you been feeling these bouts of numbness? Are there any triggers? @neutralempty

@Preety_India Your insight is duly noted. Thank you. Still, that is the reason that I put it into four distinct questions. The perils of exhibiting something like unconditional love to all, the same, shouldn’t come at the cost of one-self, too — right, I agree. Unconditional love starts with the recognition of our own value amongst everything else of value. I just want to know if it is possible at all. If yes, how does one meander through it while being practical and thoughtful? Some relationships demand certain ways of being. With unconditional love as the core, I want to know your different experiences dealing with it in this life, through the many different roles that we play.

Yes, I agree, @Leo Gura. Thank you! __ Also, @Strangeloop Thank you for your insight. Yes, true. I have found unexpected kindness from people the society usually disregards; and the ones that are supposed to reside in the premier tiers of social acceptance are usually the most crude, and arrogant.

Might be very rudimentary. Looking for an answer, still. 1) Is being too nice too bad? Why do people take nice people less seriously? 2) What makes someone take us for granted? 3) How to be the most-wanted person in a social circle? How to create that? Any ways/methods that you employ? How to be indispensable? 4) Any great relationship books on these lines? Not the really common ones. Have read those. 5) Other materials/resources are appreciated, too. (For work-related purposes, not personal) Thanks!

@Preety_India Thank you. I glanced at the threads you started, and while I may not have anything significant to contribute in terms of advice, I wish you relief and happiness in the future. Take care, Preety.

@How to be wise Thank you!

Thanks, Leo. There’s going to be heartbreak, sure. That’s almost at every turn in life, no? One last thing: I know you are no corporate climbing woman — but as someone who has devoted a lot of time to the study of human nature, could you tell me whether one could ascend the path towards holistic self-actualisation, while also being a part of a field that requires strong self-preservation instincts? Be honest. I appreciate your experiential learning, and therefore, your insight will be pondered upon with much depth.

What about a corporate-political field with super smart, experienced individuals (males, mostly)? How does one navigate so that they do not lose the game by being the good one, yet do not let anyone walk over them, and be taken for granted? Where a young woman’s opinion is valued with much regard.

Hahaha @F A B The former is a pivotal aspect, but right now, it isn’t my focal point. The latter, however, is what I am concentrating on, right now. I have given slight context in my answer to @Leo Gura This is work-related. Thus, the ‘social circle is attracting you’ part does hold water, to the most extent here. In a male dominated, competitive field, nice women are disregarded, and the ones on the other side, say the assertive ones, are looked upon with much disdain. I wish to navigate this route, and prepare myself with a level of much-needed equanimity, beforehand.

@F A B Thank you for your answer and book recommendation. Could you elaborate on this part a tad bit more?

@Leo Gura Whilst what you said is true, indeed, my question wasn’t directed towards the meek-side of nice. I’m talking about genuine nice. I believe people are so busy chasing the difficult and unattainable, that they show little concern about things that matter to those who they call nice ones. When the mind gets fixated on the next game, people seldom pay attention to the nice ones. It’s like they know that they’ll be there, no matter what. Just asking if it’s a good thing to be nice all the time in this cut-throat world? Or, is it imperative to assert dominance once in a while - like what Robert Greene has said in his book? I do wish to climb the ladder in terms of my career, and this was solely work-related. Hence, your insight on this will very much be appreciated. For a woman, especially, the line between nice and bitch is very thin, and as a young woman who wants to climb up the social ladder in an industry that is very male dominated, I wish to gain many, varied insights so that I can contemplate, assess and implement, accordingly. I’m beginning with my LP, and this is a part of my assessment. I don’t want to play games, but I do not want to lose out, as well. Look forward to your answer.