Proserpina

@Blackhawk I had that realization when I was 15. I was being excluded and bullied at school. Abused at home. Things didn't really improve after the realization, in fact they got worse (physical illness, abusive relationships, isolation) but a part of me was always in heaven after that. And the divine started channeling through me Not trying to make the thread about me but trying to point to something. MAYBE you don't need success, you don't need happiness.

Maybe you don't need your pain to alleviate. Maybe that fascination is enough. Its a deeper bliss that goes beyond the emotions.

@Blackhawk I know how you feel. Is there any part of you inside that can enjoy and bask in reality for its own sake? Can you try to find that part in you? When things are hell for me that's what I always come back to.

This is just what I've been told in the past. But now I'm starting to doubt it as I gain emotional distance. I think I surround myself with and attract people with larger pain bodies than my own which are then activated by my painbody.

Spotting Narcissism How do they react when you are at your lowest? Do they abuse you in the name of truth and honesty? How do they react when your painbody is mildly active? When you pick yourself apart do they chime in and help you pick yourself apart?

How do they react when you are at your lowest? Do they abuse you in the name of truth and honesty? How do they react when your painbody is mildly active? When you pick yourself apart do they chime in and help you pick yourself apart?

Why it happens I remember eckhart tolle saying that painbodies activate painbodies. In cycle 2 my painbody is active (as is the case for most women) and it activates even larger painbodies in others. Basically I surround myself with and attract not very nice people.

The two cycles Cycle 1- Relaxed Creative Non mind orientated Quiet Feminine Non intellectual Agreeable Zen Cycle 2- Mind orientated Intellectual Neurotic Disagreeable Assertive Confident Masculine Talkative

It's over now Relatively speaking. The cycle is over. I'm really really proud of how I dealt with it.

Psychic attacks Of course I have to admit that some psychic attacks are partially my fault. I can criticize too severely and emotionally. I'm cyclically psychotic. I radiate 'bad energy'. I try to focus on when that part of me isn't active and expand on that until it eventually overshadows that part of me. Otherwise it just causes harm. Blaming it all on myself isn't true either.

I know that when I channeled a few years ago my interest in dark skinned people heightened (I'm fair skinned). Then that gradually decreased as I returned to my baseline. I liked contrasting energies at the time, was super sensitive to it. Perhaps your preference could be a sign of something positive.

I suffered from this big time. It was deeply ingrained with circumstances frequently reminding me that I'm not hating myself enough. I would self harm as a result. One day I self harmed so badly leaving permanent large scarring I no longer felt the need to hate myself anymore. Like I had hated on myself enough. Everyone, including my abusers, can go screw themselves. So umm... maybe just let yourself hate yourself fully until you no longer feel the need to? Don't self harm of course like I did but just totally explore it.

@itachi uchiha I would focus on immersion rather than learning. Just feel the relief from their words. Also do what is easiest... I find videos on YouTube to be the easiest. The process I like doing the most is the magical creation box: putting pictures of what you want or what interests you into a folder on your computer/ phone.

Law of attraction. Listening to Abraham Hicks all day and doing the processes will rewire the mind toward optimism. That will keep you energized, focused on the positive aspects and focused on what you want.

End goal for self actualization In a none toxic environment, with no abuse. Working/ volunteering in the social field. Helping those less fortunate. Cautious in my relations with others. Not allowing abusers into my inner circle. An open heart. Soft, gentle, patient soul. My own house (which I should inherit soon) Habit building. Taking right action. Naturally thriving in a healthy environment. Aging gracefully. Healthy (as much as is possible) and fit. Self compassion. Channeling.

In a none toxic environment, with no abuse. Working/ volunteering in the social field. Helping those less fortunate. Cautious in my relations with others. Not allowing abusers into my inner circle. An open heart. Soft, gentle, patient soul. My own house (which I should inherit soon) Habit building. Taking right action. Naturally thriving in a healthy environment. Aging gracefully. Healthy (as much as is possible) and fit. Self compassion. Channeling.

Moving through dimensions It was like it was a taste of what was to inevitabley come. "You cannot escape this love". Before reaching formlessness I would collide with many different planes and dimensions of consciousness with this soulmate. Until we dissolved into infinite love. All while serving the evolution of humanity. Our souls would meet and find eachother again, forever enemies, forever business partners until we dissolved.

Apologies. I'm going through some stuff.

Since when did we become so religious that knowing so called 'truth' trumps being a good person. A healthy conscience is one of the primary fruits of consciousness in a world full of jaded, unkind people. It takes knowing the truth to remain open hearted. That's more important than anything. It stops the cycle.

@Thought Art Ridiculous generalization. There exist those who are unwell who are semi enlightened. Some of the best human beings I've met had schizophrenia.

How I was able to channel: (According to a dream I just had) Past experience. I had previous experience with channeling Life purpose. My life purpose according to my dream is to become the singularity completely. Formless. Right intention. Selflessness. Sacrificing myself for the collective. Soulmate. A soulmate was present during the channeling. Both our souls were to intertwine before and after we both reached formlessness.

I think so.

One of the most selfless and guruish personality types there are is a feminine type, INFJ (Teal Swan). In that case women simply may have not been given the opportunities that men had, and we will see that shift in the future. A woman's personal connections are not necessarily 'shallow' in her POV. Fe types and SF types can appear shallow but that's just how they enjoy communicating. Again, from personal experience I would say it's the path of least resistance rather than inherent selfishness. I think when a woman does step out of her comfort zone and sacrifices herself for the collective the karma she clears is massive. You can see this with most protagonists in stories, who typically have a feminine personality (although they are male). Those archetypes and stories don't come from thin air.

I don't think it helps to ignore the question or dismiss gender. There are differences as to how the divine is channeled. There are different difficulties and strengths. To ignore it would be to miss the opportunity to embrace that difference. And instead remain in the patriarchial.

Men could be thought of as stronger physically, higher assertiveness and typically more intellectually capable (Higher intellect trait in big 5). When I made a sacrifice when the divine called you have no idea how difficult it was and how much I stumbled. I have no doubt a part of the reason was because my femininity just isn't tailored that way. I don't blame women for taking the path of least resistance, I recieved so much trauma. I don't think the feminine is inherently more selfish, men just have an easier time.