Proserpina

Sometimes I can't relate to others not seeing the divine because I've seen it my entire life, since I was 7 and had the ability to. So I speak as if it's easy or something natural. To me, its seeing what is right in front of your face. I mean I don't have a million insights (I'm not wired that way) but I see the divine.

True, true. That's just my experience. I was really just talking to myself, reminding myself. Sometimes I forget. Sometimes I can't relate to others not seeing the divine because I've seen it my entire life, since I was 7 and had the ability to. So I speak as if it's easy or something natural. To me, its seeing what is right in front of your face.

Exactly. It was always extraordinary. Doesn't really require a big awakening or realization. It's right there in your face and it always has been.

It really is the simplest of things. It's so simple, it's overlooked.

Why don't you try to have fun with enlightenment instead of making it some big thing. 'Do' it for the beauty and joy. Then you'll have something to look forward to in your day. All you have to 'do' is see clearly. It's easy. It's fun.

Bringing It All Together Worksheet My top 3 values are… 1. Truth/reality 2. Kindness/generosity/ service 3. Optimism/Positivity/ hope My 3 signature strengths are… 1.Spirituality, Transcendence 2. Hope, Transcendence 3. Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence, Transcendence The high-consciousness virtue I want to build my career around is… • Kindness/Generosity/Service The 1 domain I want to commit to mastering is… •Spirituality My greatest personal struggle in life has been… • 'Fool' archetype. Different, childlike. Physical illness The top 5 questions that fascinate me the most about life are… 1. Who am I? 2. What is life? 3. How does healing work? 4. How do I be my ideal self? 5. How do I integrate my struggles? The top 3 moments that inspired me most in the past were… 1. Communication with higher being at 26 2. Awakening at 15 3. Communication with higher beings at 28 My Zone of Genius is… •Service/Helper role The most meaningful impact that I can have in the world is… My gift for spirituality and my love for service and spreading goodness.

"Let me give you some advice, bastard. Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you." Tyrion Lannister Integration, appreciation, love

Me sheet (from life purpose course): Life purpose: To live in and to be beauty itself. To bring goodness and beauty into others' lives. Domain of mastery: Spirituality Zone of genius: Service/Helper role Medium: One on one Top 10 values: Truth/ reality Kindness/generosity/service Beauty Optimism/Positivity/ hope Playfulness/spontaneity Honesty Modesty/ Humility Honour/ leadership Openmindedness/ perspective Joy Strengths: 1. Spirituality, Transcendence 2. Hope, Transcendence 3. Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence, Transcendence 4. Judgement, Wisdom 5. Love of Learning, Wisdom Top 5 goals: 1. Health 2. Enlightenment 3. Mysticism 4. Self actualization 5. Emotional mastery

The Self or God.

I have a feeling that the afterlife is very similar to 'psychosis'. I'll be tested. The beings there are highly reasonable though, intelligent, moral, half awake, genies/jinn. They don't torment just anyone. Even while in a hell realm, it is very much a heavenly realm. I chose a hell realm over death many times. I won't be given anything I can't handle. Someone could just go straight to a heavenly realm. Hell realms are a type of heavenly realm. Hell realms have the building blocks for a heavenly realm. That's why some people who have schizophrenia don't want to take medication. It's because even though they are tormented and are drowning, they are being tormented by angels and are drowning in a heavenly realm.

Why I value Leo: he's openminded, he's like a sponge, he's to the point, he's a great teacher, he led me to God realization, he set up a platform for me to sort myself out on.

"Generally speaking, nice people are not popular. The egoically valuable (maybe smart or rich or powerful) asshole is popular. We tend to seek approval of these assholes. We’re attracted to people who exude confidence, certainty, and high energy." Joseph Maynor. The moment you go around being humble, admitting any fault, forget it. People will jump on that with glee. . Ambient rooms are a good balance between boredom and contentment, between sitting with pain and relaxing the body. Too much of sitting with pain and you're writhing unnecessarily. Too much of relaxing the body and you'll be taking dopamine hits all the time.

Haha. "Toad Juice" He's kinda right though.

The Smell of Death notes - any zone where smell of death was present or strong was a zone where illness or violence was more likely to occur - it's a warning for very likely violence and illness - meditating on the smell of death would ease it - it was all over the planet during my second 'psychosis' - it has the capacity to kill you - my mother, who was dying, had the smell all over her. I tried to heal her by inhaling and meditating but it was too strong - inhaling the smell and taking it into yourself also decreases the smell but can make you unwell unless you meditate simultaneously. - was strong in my parents house where abuse and violence often took place. Especially in my bedroom. It was like a coffin in my bedroom. - there was incense in my bedroom that smelt very strongly of the smell of death. I inhaled it, making myself unwell and meditated over it. I cleared the room and put the incense in the shed, away from my mum. - it is negative energy . Speaking to a higher being for 8 months straight on this forum: - feelings of satisfaction and peace pervaded the experience. - he taught me ascetism and purification. - my values shifted significantly. I became a different person. - my first 'psychosis' - this being was speaking to me through a human. An extra overlay of reality. The human was Joseph. - Teachings: Love, how to evoke spirit world, true identity, Being. - was having individual visions along side - he was unconditionally loving, mentoring, humorous. - my introduction to the spirit world. After that first experience I was assumed to be capable and could handle more difficult things. - Joseph became my partner not long afterwards - it happened not long after an awakening from smoking weed and 6 months of habit work. I had quit all Junkfood and all addictions. . Beautiful unknown smells: - Positive energy. - The opposite of the smell of death. - When I meditated for a long enough stretch and there had previously been the smell of death. - Became less common as I meditated more and more often. - The initial reaction, feelings of relief, after a terrible ordeal. - I would walk around the city and the smell would waft off near everyone. Homeless people. - My room would fill up with the smell as I meditated. It reminded me of a temple. A holy place. - My clothes smelt of the smell for weeks

If everything is God, why wouldn't you be nice to God? Being is Beautiful and Good. You really wouldn't be able to help it but fall to your knees and kiss the ground if it were in 'sight'. You can tell someone's level of realization by how they treat 'others'.

'Leaning back'/detaching is not necessarily nice but it's what the feminine needs to rebalance and/or awaken.

-'Feminine' is nice inadvertently. None of the descriptors do it justice. She is 'conscious'. 'Masculine' is less conscious. She is also in alignment. -'Masculine' is attached, suffering, leaning forward, empath, unpolarized. 'Feminine' includes detached, leaning back, STO. So the labels should be 'feminine' (masculine) and feminine- Masculine (feminine). -'Leaning back'/detaching is not necessarily nice but it's what the feminine needs to rebalance and/or awaken.

@Leo Gura Yes, I know. Just wanted your opinion. <3

Most essential spiritual question: How nice are you?

Experiencing that more feminine side and ugh, I get treated like a little girl. Patted on the head. Dismissed. It's better than the psychic attacks later in the month as the masculine. Everyone hates me as the masculine because I'm not sucking their d*ck. I go back and forth because I can't stand being the feminine forever. There is no one who understands my masculine better than my feminine, including my masculine itself. 'Conceptual, serious, singleminded focus'- partner says the masculine is. My feminine is a master who gets tired of being the master. Wants to be alone, lost in solitude and writing. Lost to the world, lost to herself. The Great Pretend. The forgetting. Beginning again. The feminine holds the secret to my masculine's existence. Major channelings are when I get exhausted of the masculine (rarely) and move into the feminine on a more permanent level than cyclically. Or when I build up to the feminine after falling down. Feminine Notes: - Channelings are the 'feminine' - Premonitions, knowing, strange energy present. Mystical experiences - mastery - conscious - playful, secure, bored/ contented, sweet, calm, cheerful - STO, super empath, leaning back-leaning forward, detached- attached - masculine is the great pretend, the forgetting, beginning again. - feminine is cyclical. Forgetting and remembering - holds the reasoning for everything - feminine is cyclical or rising up after falling down - masculine is cyclical or falling down after rising up - feminine is conscious, masculine is less conscious. During certain times of the month Feminine remembers she is God and during other times of the month she forgets. It's cyclical. Both states are equal to her (that's why I call it masculine and feminine, it's equal) and she enjoys both states. "My favourite part on the path: Being a beginner again. Forgetting it all. " - I channeled while transitioning out of 'feminine'.

The voice of God was like an organism speaking as one voice. Highly intelligent, humorous. Very 'now'. As if he knew our culture inside out. It would come from many sides, angles, tones, all one voice. The darkest voices were him. The wisest voices were him. It wasn't about the content though so much, it was aura behind it. All the voices were one being. It was more obvious during the first mystic when there was less content but as the content expanded until the entire planet spoke as one voice then it became fuzzy. He would tell me he was showing me all his sides, that he was the beast but I didn't get it.

That's true. Also enneagram 5. Although I think neither psychological labelling really get to the heart of it. I often feel like I have actual attributes of disability and its genetic (my Dad is ESTP, my sister ENFP). But mbti and enneagram is a closer estimation of what it actually means.

Embracing the inner poverty of the fool would be the left hand path. Of course education is important, but I'm talking about a foolishness that cannot be educated out or improved upon. You are born into a poverty. Through the fool's poverty of not knowing you can find wealth and abundance. It's a difficult existence, full of revulsion. Their lack of humanness would make them the lowest of the low. They cannot relate with others, they are alien. "Blessed are you poor, for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are you that hunger now, for you shall be satisfied. Blessed are you that weep now, for you shall laugh."

Of course self dominant and other dominant could mean the 5% that is unpolarized in a polarized individual. But that isn't what I'm referring to. I'm referring to a larger portion. So it's unpolarized or it's service to self. STO was clean perception with STS. STS was unclean perception and stubborn (polarized)

You can feel when wellness is flowing in your body, when healing is taking place. It's a distinct feeling. The body perks up, But that is only a bonus, the icing on the cake. It is blissful for the body to be immediately well. Totally and completely well. Healing is just a bonus. You are already healed. Your body is already perfect.