Jan Odvarko

Thanks Emerald, there's a lot of valuable information in your video.

The more I observe the ever-changing nature of things using Vipassana meditation, the more my thoughts are oriented along these lines: Yesterday's "now" is today's memory. Today's "now" is tomorrow's memory. As a result, time is rushing so fast for me, and I can't seem to find any joy or fulfillment in life. The thought that everything ultimately leads to death takes away all the joy. Often I think to myself "In a sense, I'm dead already." Well, even if all of that is true, it doesn't make me any happier to be conscious about it. It makes me very depressed. Is there any milestone on the path that I might have missed? I'm quite desperate and don't know where to go from here. Can anyone identify with this? Are there perhaps any books to help me find joy after this realization? Thank you.

Thanks @akbal, I checked TM on Wikipedia and watched your YouTube link. TM reminds me of what Eknath Easwaran describes in his book "Conquest of Mind", although he never uses the words Transcendental Meditation. Personally I have some reservations about this technique, but that's not to say it is bad, it just doesn't suit me. Perhaps that's why there are so many techniques out there - to be able to pick one that suits us best. I'm happy that you found your preferred technique, @akbal, that's an important milestone on the journey!

Hello everyone! My daily schedule includes two hour-long sits on a seiza bench. Recently my knees started to hurt outside the meditation periods every time I stand, with the pain being located just below the kneecap. I tried to put some padding below my shins so that the knees don't touch the ground, but the pain returned. Maybe it's the thighs pressing on the knees causing the bones to be slightly dislocated even after meditation. I don't know. This quite worries me, I don't wan't to permanently injure my knees. I always believed seiza to be one of the safest postures, but now I'm not that sure. Any similar experiences or advices? Thank you!

His framework gets sometimes too technical for my taste, with all these graphs and formulas - this doesn't really work for me, but I guess for many western people it does the job. Nevertheless his scientific approach sometimes brings very useful insights that otherwise wouldn't be so obvious if they weren't expressed in technical terms.

@Hristi, the great thing about meditation is that whatever happens during it is good (-: Are you experiencing your mind as clear? That's good. Are you experiencing your mind as foggy or agitated? That's good too, because that means you're aware of it - which is the aim of the game.

Developing samathi by focusing on the incoming and outgoing breath as it gently touches the small area below the nostrils... during many hour-long sits. As simple as that. I think it is better not to talk about the experiences though, because people tend to compare, conceptualise, imagine, expect... All I can say is that at some point there was a very intense, ground-shaking experience.

To me, strong determination sits are the best means to rewire the mind from its old pattern of rejecting unpleasant experiences to surrendering to them and fully joining them, as @Arik said. After some time, you will develop this "taste of surrender", or "taste of purification" as Shinzen Young says, and even pain will become quite enjoyable at times. You'll be shaking in pain like a washing machine during a spin cycle and yet smiling because you'll feel it's good for you. "I'm in pain - that's great, more opportunity to practise surrender. Let me see how intimately I can merge with it." Just be careful - If the pain persists hours after you finish your sit, I'd suggest to take a few steps back.

I think we cannot really understand reincarnation until we fully awaken, because the very concept of separate mind and body is somewhat incompatible with the principle of reincarnation. Personally what I (my ego) would like to take with me to the next life is my personal "achievements", memories, thoughts, concepts - everything that creates the false self which I'll be happy to drop in this very life. Once the false self is dissolved, what is left? What is IT that will be carried to the next life? I have no clue, all I know is that it will be impersonal.

You took it right from my mouth (-: @Fitness Model, don't take the following as an excuse to skip your daily sits, but in my opinion if you miss or shorten a sit once in a while, it won't have much of an effect on your progress. Don't let it discourage you when it happens. In comparison to weeks and months of regular practice, one or two missed/shortened sits won't do any harm, IMO. The overall, long-term determination is much more important.

That's an interesting point, @akbal. When I asked my teacher why not to shorten my meditation sessions, he explained that meditation is like boiling water. You give it constant heat and only after some time it will start boiling. But don't get discouraged. You don't need to force yourself to meditate 1 or 2 hours a day if you don't see any benefit in it. Just take baby steps and extend your meditation sessions when you feel like it. Yes, trying and trying to go somewhere is the best way to get frustrated. Meditation is sometimes very counterintuitive. You'll make the best progress when you give up all trying. For a moment just be with whatever arises, gently relax into present experience, be aligned with it. If you're trying to get somewhere, that means you're resisting where you are. Meditation will teach your mind to be aligned with whatever you're experiencing, and since our minds are conditioned to constantly try to get somewhere and to improve our situation, it takes a lot of water to be boiled to change their deeply ingrained habits. I would say you can never waste your time with meditation, no matter how long or short it is. Unfortunately I don't know anything about TM, but from what I've seen, the best teachings were always distributed freely with no commercialism involved.

Hi @cactus, how about a 10 day Vipassana meditation retreat as taught by S. N. Goenka? It is a pretty challenging undertaking, but in my opinion if one is ready for it and will persevere, it will change their life.

Hi everyone! I've just had the strangest experience in my life. After early morning meditation I usually take a short nap. This time during the nap I had an extraordinarily vivid dream which seemed very much like a momentary awakening. In the dream it was a sunset, dandelions everywhere around me and I was enjoying the scenery. Suddenly some kind of shift took place. I think first it got dark, then I went through fear which had an unfamiliar taste to it, and I remembered not to fight it because it couldn't harm me, just to go with it. Then I got dull pain at the back of my head for a few moments as the perception transformed and suddenly there came a feeling of peace and joy with a kind of awe in the background, all of which is very difficult to express with my limited vocabulary. It was an experience like from a book. I could suddenly "understand" everything. There was no need to understand it intellectually, but on an experiential level I could feel everything was the way it was supposed to be. I was completely calm and free of worry. Everything was so peaceful, joyful, friendly, warm. Although my body was there observing the scenery, in my mind I was dead, or rather never actually born as a human, so detached from all this human thing. I didn't really feel I was "it" (the oneness), as many sources suggest, but rather that I was looking at something that was never so close and familiar to me as in that moment. I was observing the world with love that was no different from the love I was feeling towards myself. But still - it happened when I was asleep, or half asleep at least. If it happened during the day, I would be 100% sure it was a momentary enlightenment experience. I've never had such a vivid dream before. And what's even more strange is what happened when I half-opened my eyes after the dream. I could already see the surroundings, the ceiling and the duvet, but when I tried to pull the duvet off, it didn't move. I was sure I was moving my hand, yet I could see the duvet didn't move because my hand didn't move either. I tried again. And again. I was getting very desperate because I lost control over my body. Only on the fourth attempt my hand started to move. It was really like if the mind lost control over the body for some time. Anyone with a similar experience? Do you think a momentary awakening can happen when half asleep? ("asleep" in a conventional meaning of the word.) Because to me, the very word "awakening" suggests that one must be extremely conscious in order to experience it. I'm curious if my mind made an extraordinarily convincing and elaborate makyo or if I'm onto something. Thank you. PS: This experience gave me the following insight: We are here in this "real" world only because we really really want to experience it. It is only as solid as want to be here, and without this wanting the reality would immediately dissolve.

First it's good to clarify that it was because of anxiety and depression that I started to practice meditation. After some time both depression and anxiety subsided, or rather the suffering that would accompany them. What remains up until today however is the lack of motivation. Most of the time I'm quite aligned with the present moment, so nothing is telling me to do something to change it. What used to drive my actions was mostly fear, anxiety, and ego-centered pursuits, all of which was kind of nudging me to try reach some imagined ideal state. But now I have no ambitions, nothing to chase for and no suffering to keep me moving in some direction in order to try to get rid of it. Many a day I just lay in my bed or slowly walk and observe the world, unexcited and uninvolved. It's like a depression without suffering. Which is not very practical for life though. Anyone experienced something similar? What would you recommend? Is this some kind of intermediate step which will eventually go away? Thank you.

In my opinion you need to build this habit slowly. Shift your alarm back by 15 minutes every week or so... it's individual. Don't push yourself too hard or you'll rather stay in bed (-: When I wake up (or I should rather say "open my eyes"), I brush my teeth and straight after that I do my meditation (with fresh breath (-:) which is usually 15-30 minutes after waking up. It was very difficult at the beginning, but now it's... well, difficult too. I still have to kinda force myself, but it's less painful than it used to be.