ZenSwift

@Natasha Tori Maru Your writing makes me smile.

I honestly believe personal development is like split between self-improvement, and the other half being self-love, which comes from deep compassionate understanding and even acceptance. In my experience I had fears around being herded along like the rest of the sheep, which honestly is a healthy fear to have in my opinion if it really motivates you to take massive action. Taking massive action is going to be what sets you apart. But you may end up realizing that this uniqueness of you will not actually leave. Sure it may not flower as much if you do not give love to it, but I don't think it'll actually completely disappear. Just notice where you're being authentic to pursuing excellence and where you are being neurotic of trying to not fit into the crowd. Every year I find myself establishing even deeper groundwork for what self-development actually is. I almost feel like I'm starting over every year, but on more firm ground. Or sober ground.

I was so proud of myself when I dipped into a relatively deep state of Solipsistic Consciousness on one of my trips. The "fucking nobody is here" level. Shocking stuff! I'm also happy for the time being, being pretty asleep to that atm. I will say that it DOES help me get my priorities straight when I am conscious of solipcism. It has immediately empowered me to set better boundaries.

@Zeroguy wouldn't that be the best part though? Being so conscious that you are actually just all the people in the room? Just that level of consciousness is satisfying enough. Let alone fucking with that level of consciousness! Bucket list goals right there

Made me smile

Mind blown 🤯 It almost sounds like God-Realization is the only game in town. Like of anything to do ever in life that is of any value.

@Zen LaCroix Thankyou very much I appreciate it

How would you describe what the word "enlightenment" points to, with your current understanding of reality? Becoming conscious of no-self? (I feel like words may fail entirely here.)

@Zen LaCroix Thankyou for the post. I found some great insights to chew on. Could you please elaborate on each of these insights? I'd love to understand these deeper. "Need a sense of urgency that it has to happen now" "All change happens when you step out of your current identity" "Make love to every word you say" "Easiest way to change your life is through hypnosis" <especially this one "Create a second personality" "You need to be able to communicate with full self-belief" "Need a sense of urgency that it has to happen now" "Unless you light a fire under your ass it ain’t gonna happen" Thankyou.

I can't wait to loose my mind with none other than Leo himself. I've had many trips where I thought, "man, it would be nice to have Leo to be right here to guide me through all the noise."

January 10th 2023 So in this trip, both my mother and I did 5g. I was upstairs listening to Leo getting my mind blown left and right, while occasionally checking on my mother that starts channelling like crazy on these mushroom doses. Unlike the last time we tripped together, we were both tripping safely at home. Mom took her dose at 12:48pm. (2.8g Golden Teacher + 2.2g Blue Meanies) = 5g My dose was taken at 1:20pm (1.05g Blue Meanies + 3.95g Amazonian) = 5g We started to get high at about the same time. My Main Intentions What is Consciousness? What is Love? What is Relationship? Secondary Intention For Later How can I Focus Even more? >Never got to it. Listened to this: 10 minutes in Noticing my body shaking like before. Amazonian strain does this for me. 20 minutes High Shit moving. 33 minutes in. A new level of high kicked in. Noticing a subtle ear ringing. This trip feels like Avatar. I feel like I am one of the Na'vi People. I recently watched Avatar 1&2 and this trip felt like Avatar 2. This was beyond awesome. Insight: If you watch movies before your trip, your trip will start to feel like the mind-space of that movie. Insights and Musings We are part of one Divine mind. I can see that now, that is a fucking rough one to swallow Start writing your proud story. When it comes to life purpose, think about having such an awesome life that when it comes time for someone to write a biography on you, it will be a fucking amazing read Attachment so fucking deep. The love that you get from a mother is what motivates you to be the proud protector of the tribe. You need to have a fucking story always inspiring you. Periodically watch movies to inspire you. Use the minds of other people to bring wisdom to me. Powerful people have the luxury to use other minds to do thinking for them. Have other Minds working for you to give you the best insights. ZONK yourself with powerful catalyst experiences to get yourself in the zone of becoming who you want to become. I noticed in my life that there were moments before going to bed where I would look at the ceiling and I chose to love my life. I said, "Even in this moment, I am happy". I need you to choose to love your life. This is a decision that you make. One thing that's very remarkable about psychedelics is how much it interconnects all your memories such that there is an easy flow between several memories at once. There is a memory that popped up in my consciousness Where I remembered when I won the gold medal for a soccer game when I was a child and after I won the soccer coach told me I was a warrior. Good times. I demand Warriors out of my people. I am very surprised how little visuals I got with this strain. I was very surprised with how much I was grounded this entire trip. I didn't allow myself to get whisked away nearly as much. Even though this was one of my most potent doses. Perhaps it was because of the lack of visuals? In future trips, I will really focus on grounding myself much more because this helped a whole lot with producing great insights. It was incredible to notice how my mind had this remarkable ability to have several trains of thought at once. It's like my mind was able to segment itself into its own subdivisions. Definitely alien level thinking. Leo says: "Why can't they're universe just choose to exist?" Makes sense to me. How to give a wicked compliment: Give people compliments to stay in their consciousness for a while. Where your compliment gets into the minds of other people. "I want you to think about this compliment for the rest of your night". Your life is a maze, Welcome. Welcome to the puzzle that is your life. When you become the physical embodiment of the man that you want to become people have to rise up to your level or they can fuck off. Become so based that people TREMBLE in your presence because you make them feel so inadequate by just existing. This is why becoming the ultimate embodiment is the ultimate power Self-Actualization and Shadow work especially is crawling out of the contexts that you have trapped yourself in. It's like finding your way out of a house that is completely hoarded to the ceiling. One needs to crawl out of the paradigm locks they've unconsciously put themselves in. Crawl yourself out of the fucked family you're in and the fucked up friend group you are attached to. Crawl yourself out of your shitty wage-slave job that is forcing you to live paycheck by paycheck. Crawl yourself out of your own limiting beliefs that is preventing you from making steps. Crawl yourself out of all the anxieties and neurotic OCD tenancies you have. Crawl out of a rats nest of bad habits you have developed over years of being mediocre. I respect those that have the courage to live another day. Especially when life starts to really suck. I'm noticing that when teaching people you need to give them plenty of contexts for their mind to think about in order to grasp the nature of what you are talking about. Steelman your arguments with layers upon layers of context to deconstruct. Construct and deconstruct. That is how you teach. I started to really notice that I will use my language in an intelligent way to bake in contexts and metaphysical assumptions. A wise teacher understands how to do this intentionally. I will be teaching people how to understand a specific concept, and I'll intentionally layer it with additional contexts in mind. I'll layer it with the context of a positive mindset I'll layer it by speaking in a certain way that is accurate to my metaphysical contemplations. I'll layer it in the context of it being empowering/ ego boosting. I'll layer it under a context of using specific beliefs that I know that the student is attached to. So I will intentionally hook them in that way. I'm noticing that we will rationalize our indoctrinations that made us go through pain and suffering. These rationalizations will massively influence our relationships with our decisions that we make today. For example, all the pain you went through being an ADHD child, not being able to focus. To the point where you actually started to believe that you are an actual loser without this medication. Where you believe that you are an unfocused mess. But then you grow older, you start eating clean, you start having 8 hours of quality sleep every night, you eat super healthy, you do a heavy metal detox, you're actually fine to focus without it. THAT plus eliminating all of your distractions and actually sitting down and training yourself to focus. This is at least the story I had. Where I realized that the ADHD medication I had was doing me no favors. The only time it did me favors was when I had to sit in a boring lecture at school that was DESIGNED to bore you to death. Because I suffered so much to take that medication, I unconsciously constructed a story as to why I was a loser without it. When your life becomes more abundant, you will naturally grow outside of the life that you're in. You grow outside of the environment that you are in. Subconscious patterns are constantly governing our decisions all the time. This is why you have to be incredibly strong-willed to cultivate enough awareness to break these old patterns. I believe that men have an easier time doing this than women because women are influenced by their emotions a whole lot more. The difference between a human and an animal is that a human can make a choice to not be influenced by their desires. We will naturally become a loser if we just listen to our crybaby attitudes to take the path of least resistance. We will NATURALLY become a bitch if we are not intentional about always doing the emotionally difficult thing. It wouldn't be a story worth having if there wasn't conflict. Conflicts in every single moment unlocks the beauty and intelligence of life. It is through the exchange of conflict does intelligence allow itself to be birthed. The physical objects around you bake in meaning. So design your physical environment intelligently. Invest money to personalize gifts for your people to strengthen your relationships. Nothing is more special than a well thought out, personalized gift. Meaning = Personalization. You need to earn today. Every single day needs to be earned. Have a thing with fighting for. You're either a king or a loser, there's no in-between. Being an amazing director of movies demands a massive understanding of people's lives, psychology, stages of development, all of it. Plus all of the nitty gritty details of understanding complex politics to construct all these deep storylines and narratives. Eat salty chips to control the bladder so you don't have to go pee as much from drinking all this water to avoid the shroom hangover. Drink lots and eat chips. More insights on how to improve yourself fast. Go to WAR on your Life. Declare WAR on your Life. You need to be hyper vigilant to constantly notice all the patterns you've unconsciously indoctrinated yourself with. Build awareness as fast as you can. Psychedelics Meditation Meditative yoga Journalling Contemplation Visualization Solo retreats Crawl yourself out of the perceived contexts that you are in. Train mega awareness. Cultivate Strong relationships to facilitate your growth. Allocate resources towards yourself. Spend money. At least 10% of your total income needs to be spent towards yourself Buy life coaching. Invest in physical infrastructure Laptops Heavy Metal Detox Supplies Get your own place / Move out Nothing is more powerful than making an intelligently placed investment in yourself. Get rid of all the addictions Get rid of all the toxic people. Treat every day as day one. The worst day. The most valuable resource you can leverage is your time. Have the courage to live way below your means such that you have much more time to work on yourself. Focus on taking away the distractions, and learn how to focus properly with discipline. Both of these need to be combined together for maximum result. Find your focus style. Use the Kolbe A Index. Separate tasks dependant on their cognitive difficulty. Then do the most cognitively difficult activities first, and move down the list as the day goes on and your energy drains. Constantly ask yourself: Am I going to show up for today? I asked this question every time I stepped into a cold shower or started a brutal workout. Start making plans as to how you're going to use all the money you're going to make to build a case as to why you're going to need it. Random Thoughts One day directors are going to use AI to fix movie mistakes and cinema sins. A meaningless tattoo is a sign that you are meaningless. Post Trip Report Very fun trip, was very confident throughout. Had lots of connecting moments with my mother. My mom got massive clarity on her trip. I need to study more about 5meo more so I can get myself ready for it! I am slowly building more and more understandings of deep metaphysical insights.

Leo is there a list somewhere, already like a checklist you could go through to question each attachment your mind may have, comprehensively unraveling the mind piece by piece?

Only place I can get genuine insight on my deep metaphysical, epistemological musings from my trip reports and such.

The type of people that I would meet at the retreat alone would be a crazy experience in itself. Let alone the value Leo would bring into the retreat.

In this case then, I don't mind hiding the posts and wiping the image completely from this site.

Sorry Leo, my intention was to spread humour. I can understand that this can be way too serious of a thing for to even joke about for you, given your position of influence. @Zen LaCroix(My phone won't stop tagging you when I make a reply in this thread sorry)

@Zen LaCroix This is literally going to be the first hour: Followed by cries that look like timestamp 3:00

These are traps I’ve noticed myself and/or others falling into, even with the desire to be a “good student” of Leo’s work, even with Leo explicitly creating warnings. These are some pitfalls I’ve noticed. Note: I originally wrote this myself, then asked ChatGPT to polish it slightly for clarity while preserving at least 95% of the original text’s integrity. The ideas and experiences are still fully mine—this is just a cleaner version of what I wrote. Don’t mind the em-dashes guys! 1. Wage Slavery With the increased awareness of the idea of wage slavery, I’ve seen individuals—myself included—use this as an excuse to avoid getting a job, without having the courage or readiness to start a business either. The result? They just get stuck. I think following Leo's content on this topic can sometimes lead to a demonization—and even a fear—of working a regular job. But what many fail to recognize is that wage slavery is primarily a mindset, not just the act of taking a 9-to-5 job. If you're employed and work a 9-to-5, yes, technically you’re part of the system. But that doesn't mean you're a wage slave. A wage slave is someone who is unconscious of how the system is using them. That unconsciousness is the slavery—it's mental enslavement. If you're working a job and aware of your situation, with plans to transition out of it in the future, then your mind is not enslaved. You're simply playing the game strategically. And the reality is, you might need to work that job for years before making your next move. In some cases, working a job might be the best thing you can do for your mental health—it gives you structure, stability, and keeps you from falling into apathy or depression. Yes, be wise about how you plan your life so you don’t trap yourself long-term. But also, don’t let fear keep you from stepping into the survival pressure cooker if that’s the most logical next step in your growth. 🔗 Watch Leo’s video: How To Escape Wage Slavery 2. Academia After watching Leo’s “Should You Go To College?” video, where he flat-out says “college is for stupid people,” I agreed with what I believed was the essence of that message. But I also realize now that I used that message to justify avoiding the discomfort and effort of academia. It took years of demonizing academia before I finally surrendered to the idea that maybe getting a formal education might not be such a bad thing. I discovered that I’m not a natural self-starter or entrepreneur. I am ambitious, but within the limits of my comfort zone and personality. At least at this time. I now see that becoming a licensed therapist and going through the necessary education is a reasonable step on my path. The trap here was that I locked myself into this “Actualized.org identity” where I felt like I was supposed to reject the crowd, say “fuck school,” and reject the system’s indoctrination entirely. Sure, if I studied academic philosophy, I’d probably end up epistemically and metaphysically corrupt. But when it comes to topics like psychology or social work, there’s still value in conventional education. Yes, I’m chasing a credential so I can get employed—but that’s where I’m at, and I accept it. I will see how I feel when I start to enter into that world. I also kind of miss school. Part of my journey has been learning how to regulate my brain so I can actually focus on what matters. I’ve got at least 50 books on my shelf—mostly from Leo’s book list—that I haven’t even cracked open. I’m ashamed of that. But it’s the honest truth about where I’m at in terms of motivation and discipline. I want to be like Leo in that video where he leans on 200 books, saying, “Look how cool I am.” But for whatever reason—maybe personality type—this has been a massive challenge for me. Still, as time passes, I’m learning that I’m healthiest when I’m actively making room for structured extra-curricular learning. 🔗 Watch Leo’s video: Should You Go To College? - Common Traps & Mistakes How to Do Real Personal Development - - Peak reading goals. 3. Pickup / Dating Dynamics This is something Leo has spoken volumes about, especially in his 3-part series on How To Get Laid. He’s also dropped insane knowledge bombs on the forum over the years—some of which have fundamentally shifted my understanding of dating, sexuality, and male-female dynamics. And the most valuable insight of them all? That I needed to actively train myself to become a social human being. Embracing this healthy approach to socialization has had a genuinely transformative effect on my life. That said... There’s an uncomfortable truth here: to be conventionally successful with women, a certain level of deception and corruption is often required. And for me, that’s tough. I find it especially hard to do anything that feels morally wrong—even if it would satisfy a base sexual need. It feels like I’d just be shooting myself in the foot... like spitting in the wind. That’s not to say I always make the most noble choices in my dating life—far from it. I’m no angel. In fact, I’m a devil—a fucking vulture—as Leo once called me. But I’ve noticed that when it comes to certain dynamics, it’s hard for me to be a full-on “player,” or to act like a dick—even though being that dick would probably get me laid. I’m just too nice. The truth is, I haven’t been “slapped around” enough by women yet to fully understand what makes them respond with genuine attraction. I simply don’t have that level of real-world experience… yet. I think a major trap here is simply not accepting the arduous process of making yourself vulnerable and exposing yourself to a ton of real-world experience. I see way too many people who just don’t fully accept how massive an undertaking it actually is to become successful with women. The Expectations are not set correctly. Setting Proper Expectations How To Get Laid - Part 1 - The Foundations Of Success With Women 4. Demonizing Survival (Not Accepting It) This one is so damn common—trying to get to Leo’s level, or Sadhguru’s level, while you’ve still got a mountain of survival challenges and karma to burn through. You’re not going to become a yogi overnight. You’ve got to master being a devil first. You’ve got to master survival. There’s a deep, often subconscious, desire to be “above” our animalistic nature—to transcend being a horny monkey who craves power and status. But the truth is, that part of you must be acknowledged, worked with, and integrated. You can’t just meditate your way out of it. You can’t bypass it through spiritual ideology. If you try, you’ll end up in delusion or repression. The sooner you face it, the sooner you’ll understand what actually needs to be done to burn through those primal parts of yourself. Even if you want to burn through it with REAL Spirituality. I still think that this can be too tough for most people. Most people are not going to be actually motivated to do the hardcore REAL spirituality. They are not yet (me included at this time) conscious enough to see the value of it to actually put it into practice in a rigorous, industrious manner. Not only that—but if you skip over survival and dive straight into spiritual bypassing, you’ll probably miss out on valuable life experiences that would shape and grow you in unique ways. I’ve noticed a lot of deep insights about yourself are hidden behind the obstacles you face when solving the maze of your survival situation. What is Fake Spirituality? ( Real Spirituality Defined in this Lecture) Life is a Maze Hope this provides productive insight for some of you. Feel free to share your thoughts. Love you guys.

This is super exciting.

Someone say Vulture Game?

My mind is open. I'm interested.

I'm solipsistic. I've temporarily experienced states of extremely high solipsism. Realizing that I'm the only player in this game of life. Just fooling myself that I'm not alone. I am currently asleep to this truth. But it still lingers subtly in the background of everyday life. But I can foresee, after enough trips, I feel that this state of solipcism will only deepen. Just like how my awareness of no eyes, no face, no head, has deepened. What a killer shift in perception! On my last trip, it was painfully obvious for a bit, having me saying: "HOW THE FUCK ARE OTHER PEOPLE POSSIBLE? THERE NOT!!! 🤡😂🤡😂🤡😜🤡🤓🤡🤣🤡 " 😩🤯😰😱

@Leo Gura This reminds me of something I lightly intuited from a trip... It appears that selflessness (from ego dissolution) equals intelligence. Selflessness = Intelligence Am I on the right track? What could I contemplate to deepen this inquiry?

I can't wait to get myself a PHD on something that's absolutely a joke. And still reap the survival and power benefits.

Wayne Dyer. He's a huge inspiration for me of the kind of guru/ teacher I'd like to be. Dude was an absolute Juggernaut.