Breakingthewall

I'm in the process in the sense that I can't quite forget my father, feel something deeply negative and sad in my life, i hope i can find the way in this. but in the sense of self-esteem yes. there are no traces of feeling "worse" left, no compensation for feeling "better". I can see others as brothers totally. It has cost me a lot, when they put a programming in your childhood, it is difficult to reverse it, you have to go deep When i said to go further in hard things, i was thinking they are healthy, even you haven't any problem. the hardness, the difficult, the austere, it makes you cleaner, or so it seems to me. in the end it makes life happier

I've had that problem for as long as I can remember. As a child it did not affect me but as a teenager a lot. my father was: I am special, magnificent, God loves me. but you are worse .God does not love you. you are shit. Since he did it full time, he did it well. many people believed him, which reinforced the role. The bad thing is that it is stressful and to take away he was an alcoholic, addicted, he vomited after every meal, he did not sleep ... he died very young. When I realized I was in trouble, I had to get very serious. my instinct told me to look for the hardest, the most extreme hardness possible. that that was what i needed. I did it, I keep doing it. I could have gone further. Maybe it will go further. not everything is meditation, psychedelics or therapy. you also have to go down to the sand

you have no control, since you are just an idea, a fiction. the you who thinks he is trying to understand is a compendium of memories, attachments and rejections, ideas and concepts without any reality. you do not exist. you do not suffer. you do not want. you don't reject. you are not dysfunctional, nor functional. you're just an idea. it's hard to admit it. If you remove that you, what it is remains, without judgment. what it is is indefinable. the definition is you. and there is no definition

there are infinite illusions, but they are just that, illusions. Illusion are the truth, but seems a lie, that's all. Appearance. Seems that there is you and me, my phone and my hand. Born and die, time. And really seems that. My phone and my hand are a though. Born and die is a though. You and me is a though. The Truth is the same without the differentiation that the mind does

"I" am infinite. infinity can hardly be limited to an "i", so I prefer to see it as a "we". I suppose it could be an "i", but an "i" suggests loneliness, and infinity is not alone. loves himself with infinite love, and accompanies himself infinitely

Yeah but relative seems different than absolute. Seems. that's why I called it illusion

friend, you have a long way to go, to arrive ... where you are right now. It is a strange story, an epic odyssey. the reality is that you are already where you want to go. that is, you are, there is nowhere to go. But you have to drop tons of shit until you realize it, and that takes a process. good luck with it. Strength and courage

in the relative sense, no. we were born at different times. but the relative sense is an illusion. in the absolute sense, we were never born, time does not pass, we are. now, always, it's the same

many people are spiritual to affirm their ego: they want to feel that they are deeper than the "normies", that they know things that only a select few know. exactly the same as those who believe in conspiracy theories

The easy solution, the one that most applies, myself included, is: get strong. Is your ideal of how you should be? Get as close to that ideal as possible and you will be happier. it is true in a way but it is a patch, and a surrender to social pressure . You say you don't blame the world, it doesn't cause your problem. Well, it does in my opinion. the reinforcement of how you should look to be correct, and how incorrect (unworthy of love) you are for being far from that archetype, appears every day, especially in adolescence. we want to be completely free of all that. It is very difficult, it is like swimming against the current. Like to be gay in saudi arabia. imo you have to understand that you are fighting against the system, if you don't perceive the pressure of the system, and how it affects you, you will be crushed. But honestly, I'm far of win this fight

@JonasVE12 very good answer, you look like a professional, psychologist maybe? although most psychologists do not understand things in a deep way. I have struggled with shame, I know where it comes from but it is a difficult virus to eliminate. I've apparently removed it completely, but I always find a tendency to hide things. I fight against it and am a kind of truth taliban, because I know the price of falsehood. usually this kind of attitude is a gift from your parents

@Ivan D great understanding. in someone 17, impressive. As you say, addiction is something you use to mask a problem. the question is what is the problem. In my opinion, the problem is always anxiety, and anxiety is always a lack of love. in the broadest sense. I don't want to say something like: your parents didn't love you. it is more to feel separated from love, in the metaphysical sense. this creates a very hard feeling of emptiness, very difficult to bear. Understanding why you have separated from love is not easy, you have to put your intuition to the maximum. really how to understand this is to understand the ego, the way of being human, to understand yourself

suffering comes standard with the human. with language he creates a huge imaginary world of thought, past and future, concept and idea, and loses himself in it. To be lost in this world, attached to thoughts, is to a greater or lesser extent suffering. the vast majority of humans are immersed in this imaginary world and suffering. Getting out of this suffering is difficult, since it is the only thing you know, since it's the only thing that can be known. Any goal you set yourself to get out of this will just be more thought. here we are all for this: to get out of the mental matrix. it's not easy, but it's not impossible. The problem always is: you can't get out of the mental matrix because the mental matrix is you

Exactly. how important is reincarnation? One of the most important things that you realize with spirituality is to live in the present, to realize that the past is dead, it does not really exist. You are what you are today, nothing more, nothing less. what you were yesterday is imaginary, ego, what you were in your childhood, even more so. what were you in another life? delirium. only now you are, only now exists

to find what? you just have to realize the infinite that you are. maybe you have not realized. The way that leo propose is quite effective, in fact the most effective ever. then be as disinterested as possible. give all the love you can. and that's it. when you see what you are, the ego seems stupid.

@KatiesKarma have you tried mushrooms? they do miracles

The day will come where all humans love themselves and others in a totally selfless way. where there is no more desire, only fullness of being. where to compare and value does not exist, where infinity smiles through each person. where the human has completely realized himself and is only a carcass of god. that's the way that goes slowly but surely

you are just my imagination. and yet I am your imagination. let's take off the imaginary disguise and recognize ourselves as the same. So lonely, much better that infinite illusion

when buddha said that life is suffering he was referring to the ghostly life of the ego. the life of an animal is not suffering, it simply is. the human by his speaking nature enters the cloud of the ego, and that turns him, by definition, into a mad being. Buddha proposed the cure for human collective insanity. we are trying to cure our insanity. more than everything is suffering, everything is madness, disease of the mind due to attachment to thought

Everything indicates that human life is a learning process. reincarnation would be the logical step to complete the process. this is not to say that none of this is true, but it seems

serious in the sense that life tests you, there are times when you have to give it your all, or you get stuck in a dead end and the game can get very unpleasant. not very serious in the sense that deep down it doesn't matter. it's a serious game, but a game

I took a shot on a salvia extract and at the moment it seemed to me that reality was bouncing, and that I had to bounce to balance it or reality was going to fragment. I started jumping around a very small apartment breaking all kinds of things, my babysitter was a girl and she couldn't make me stop. suddenly everything stopped in a second

in the middle of infinity ... what year could it be? the only year, the only day, the only second

we know that reality is illusory right? a kind of hologram whose substance is nothing. A thought. we are illusion, we do not exist, only like a thought. So if you stay in a coma, they give you propofol, deep sleep, whatever ... what? it's part of the dream too. where did you go when propofol? If there is no propofol, neither you , nor where to go

I would say that all the possibilities, infinite, are right now, and they are all nothing. why are we perceiving something concrete right now and not something else? the eternal question ...I don't know