Breakingthewall

another point of view: you torture yourself because you perceive yourself as unworthy of love. As you perceive yourself as such, you try to make yourself worthy, increasing your self-concept. endless trap. why do you feel unworthy? because you have been raised by people who perceived themselves as unworthy. why did they do it? because for thousands of generations, human society has needed each piece to fit, fulfill its mission, stand firm in battle, in order to survive, exist, not be one of those that are extinguished. for this we have developed an enormously powerful feeling: shame. this feeling has been necessary for the group to behave as a single individual, and still is. all your learned and genetic conditioning, from the cave, screams at you: you must not be unworthy. it is better to die than to fail the tribe. transcending this is anything but easy. first, to understand, to unravel every little meaningless shame, to undo it. second, give shame its place. serve society. play your part, but without depending on external approval. freedom demands servitude, since we are human

I would say that there are two types of desire. a desire that comes from your true nature, which makes you seek more life, more love, more beauty, more depth. it is the desire that makes you exist, and it comes from love. And another wish that makes you want to be more. it is the same desire, it comes from the same source, but it is confused, perverted. focuses on the idea of the self, which is a mental creation that appears through social interaction, false by definition, and which is the source of all the problem. another thing is that the cessation of desire leads you to enlightenment as the Buddhists say, i don't think so. The desire of be more, yes, but the true desire is the one that makes you go deeper, and the one that allows you to erase everything that is false, purify yourself, and be what you really are. and yet you will always wish for more life, more love, more depth, since this wish is the source of life

Try to understand this, and you will understand nahm: Attention is a strange phenomenon. Attention can be concentrated on thoughts, so that there may seem to be a plurality of attentions. However, in direct experience you can never put attention on attention. Just as the tip of this finger can never point to the tip of this finger. But the thought makes it seem so. As if it could be. As if attention could take a break from intrinsic and effortless creation. The thought can even make it seem as if the attention is coming from a world. Emotions that are experienced directly...only through the belief of thoughts, can even create the belief that the hate comes from a secondary source. One world, others, all kinds of beliefs. Attention, with thoughts, can become so misleading that it can seem that happiness is something that can generate, I, which is being, attention. Looking at the dream board, happiness is very abundant. The feeling of the possibilities, the potentiality, the knowing of creating consciously, since there was no dream board, and there was nothing written on it, and it was said that it would be so, and so it is now. It is a pleasure to appreciate what is and to witness how what will be works, to witness and be the functioning, without ever knowing how it works. Even in tension can go, in the release of the claim. And consciousness is simply, albeit so magically, conscious. The tip of this finger cannot touch the tip of this finger. But why would he have to do it while the magic is and is this finger? I used to point to others and the world. Now he rejoices in his own being, pointing to a dream board in a dream.

Yes , the ego is god, since God is everything. There is only god, or infinity, or reality, any name, since it can't be limits. and what appears to be separate, like the ego, is only an appearance, a form of reality

the ego is natural intelligence in its pure state. the same that makes birds have wings, or that in a human body there are 7 thousands of quadrillion atoms organized in a perfect pattern, each one occupying its exact place

You , as an ego, are your thoughts. Without thoughts there is not you. The you that you said that has to recognize is the thoughts. That's why it's so difficult. Your mind give you thoughts because your ego needs the incessant talk to take a form. Detaching yourself from the incessant chatter is not something you can do at will. without the talk you are limitless, but the ego needs limits and it will stick to the talk. what you have to do is stop needing limits, as if you say to a drug addict: you have to stop needing the drug. this need is very deep, it has a reason the ego is a form made to fit among other forms, in the puzzle that is the collective ego. your limitations , your need of form, created from childhood ,are real, solid energy patterns. They came from thousands generations. what the ego has to do is understand as deeply as possible, and then apply mechanical means to break through its limitations. they can be softened with a lot meditation and psychedelics. ideas only pave the way to start the real work

@Someone here Well, really most of animals are most of time busy with the survival, so they have no space to emptiness. We are full of thoughts, they are full of survival work, so that's why a person can be absolutely empty of everything and totally enlightened , or as you said, conciouss of being enlightened, and the animals can't, same that the babys, full of learning work . They are more pure than an ego because they are the direct experience but not really enlightened , they can't go deep . Well, maybe some of them could, who knows

reality is infinite emptiness. As an ego, the infinite emptiness terrifies you, since it shows your unreality. divides you by infinity, and the result is zero. There is nothing worse. as an ego, you prefer to be tortured than to be divided by infinity. so you don't stop thinking for a moment, since thinking makes you "something". every thought is a form in the void. you link one after another and maintain the (stressful) illusion of being you. a cat understands reality much better. it just is, it's an experience. does not know that there is a cat, because there is not. cat is an idea. what there is is the experience, the smell, the touch. The cat is not afraid of the empty infinity because it doesn't know that it is a cat. It's just the empty infinity happening we, as social humans who use language and connect to each other like serial processors to create a more powerful processor, or collective ego, fall hopelessly into the ego trap. we create an illusory entity that is the self. see you from outside. we are not the experience, like the cat, but we are a ghostly entity created by the mind that leaves the experience in the background. the attachment to this entity is great. even when its falsity is seen it seems impossible to abandon it. The reality is that everything you can think of is nothing. It's not right or wrong, it's just unreal. what is real is direct experience

do therapy. go to a psychologist and tell him what embarrasses you the most over and over again. Then tell the people around you. You will quickly see that what seemed like pure poison to you is trivial. you just have to air the wounds so that the pus dries

@Razard86 It's not exactly like that . I can, for myself, have a commitment to the truth. my vital intention is: the truth is the goal, I want to be true. The truth will set me free. So you ask me: do you know Jesus? and I deny him three times (for example), because I poop in my pants. I lied, yes, but out of cowardice. In a normal example: i lie because i think that the truth would show me as unworthy, but I'd like a lot to be capable to say the truth. When I'm alone i tell the truth to myself as much as I can, and i try to do more and more, and my ego grows and get more mature another very different thing is if I intentionally have a commitment to lying. my life intention is: hide who you are. you're disgusting, get as far away from yourself as possible, and invent another character. you are totally unworthy of love and you must create another character who is worthy of love, and become it. work hard to create that character, and when you have it done, you will finally be lovable. and never reveal who you really are, what you really feel, what's more, forget it and replace it with the other, then you will be free. So your ego gets totally stuck , and your false ego grows, but he is a demon, he is not you real ego. If the ego is a lie by definition, the fake ego is the lie of a lie

because your consciousness, if you take away the form and content, is empty and formless. Being so, it has no limits. Being no limits it encompasses everything. if it encompasses everything, any other consciousness is the same consciousness.

the ego is as it is because the traps of attachment are strong, and many. if it is weak, it will let itself be dragged over and over again. he has to conquer the world, or at least in part, so that he can later discard it. maybe there are cases where this is not necessary, natural mystics who are born in mystical cultures, but in our materialistic culture you have to be very strong to swim against the current

Maybe 5 meo is different. I find it extremely straight. It erases the mind in a level that seems impossible in another way Could you explain? I'm really interested . I would say that it is to be in a state without barriers permanently. the constant perception of the infinite that you really are. So a state. Independently if you couldn't sit without movement more than 10 min Of course have control of yourself is important, a tool, manual practices are fundamental, but maybe not always needed

I'd say quality is in intention. the narcissist intentionally tends to lie. the non-narcissist tends to the truth. He wants it, even though he fears it and sometimes behaves more narcissistically than the narcissist. This is degree too? Could be, at the end everything is. But not, i think that a narcissistic person can stop being one if he changes his desire to lie for a desire for truth. I think it's a quality. a level 1500 ego can be less narcissistic than a level 1000 ego. what happens is that his fear is greater, but his tendency is positive, while the other is negative

I do not think it is like that. if I am sitting face to face with you having a beer, I try a genuine communication, with more or less success, trying to understand you and for you to understand me. to flow together. As I am far from perfect, I will do it with relative success and narcissistic touches will escape me. But if instead what I do is a performance where I'm selling you my character, having the need or see me reflected in a mirror , and you are the mirror , apart from being an unbearable pain in the ass and giving you a boring time, I'll be a narcissist. You never tried sex with a narcissist? She is masturbating and you are the dildo

But but from what I've read I deduce that you've never done 5 meo. there are psychedelics and psychedelics

imo the message is very superficial. if this is neo advaita, it is an empty message, which does not understand or want to understand....because there is nothing to understand in her opinion. But you can know. She says the ego is not real, that it is a construction made for survival. ok, yes, and? that's completely obvious. and yet you are. they say: but you are nothing and there is nothing to understand. you still are. I think she speaks from logic, from avoidance and from dogma. Without will to really go deep. There is nothing, but nothing is, and there start the thing, no finish. They think they are enlightened and they stopped in the first step

accurate and subtle perception imo

people are sad because they are smart. only idiots are happy running after the carrot and trying to fit in. sadness makes it necessary to look for an alternative and the alternative is liberation

I would say that you have to build a strong ego because then you have to deconstruct it, and to do that you are going to have to overcome one obstacle after another. your ego moves with the inertia of the collective ego, forged in thousands of generations. it is very easy to get carried away by that current, so you need an ego capable of following its own path and believing in itself to start deconstruction

Yeah I Know it. I try to remove the lie from me, and I realize that behind one layer of lies, there is another. and all generate resistance. Now I think I hardly lie to myself, but two years ago I believed the same thing and from now on I realize that I had tons of pretense, half-truths, resistance, so I suppose that in two years I will think the same as now. the ego is a difficult labyrinth, because it has the capability of to hide things to itself

well, ultimately it is. Degree makes quality. I would say that the characteristic of the narcissist is that he has lies at his core, while a non-narcissistic ego uses lies, but does not need to believe them himself. that is the difference in quality. but at the same time it is also of degree, since the ultimate nature of the ego is the lie. its existence is a lie. then, an ego that uses lies like trump and does not believe it, and admits to himself without problems that he is a son of a bitch, would have a lower grade than one who also needs to feel integral and lovable, morally superior. what happens is that the degree barrier between these two ways makes a great qualitative leap. the narcissistic ego will go into crisis if pushed. the non-narcissist will laugh in your face. The non narcissist has the possibility to trascend itself because he can face itself. The other, looks impossible except with years of intense suffering

@Razard86 thanks! I also enjoy your posts. what I see is that the problem with trauma is that it generates anxiety in the long term since it opens a gap between what it is and an imaginary should be. this gap is pure anxiety. in my experience it is impossible to equalize the two tracks from the ego. the ego looks for strategies to get rid of anxiety but what it does is hide it. there is still a dull anxious vibration in the background, since the ego in the background is what it should be. the only thing that has worked for me is the realization of infinity. It doesn't mean that there is no longer anxiety, but every time I realize infinity, the should be disappears and the tracks get closer.

Imagine the reality for a fetus. or what is the same, imagine that they cut a cable from your brain and disconnect you from your senses, and then they erase your memory. what would you be? according to the ego's point of view, you would be nothing, a vegetable. something without capacity or characteristics. but you really would be everything. unlimited. Out of time or space, infinity. every attribute is a limitation.

Well, you could say: the truth is the infinity. It's an idea that point the truth, but it's not the truth, because you can't imagine the infinity, you can realize it if you dissolve the limits that the ideas are.