Mulky

Anything that has qualities that get attributed to the devil or evil or whatever, exist as part of god, they aren't 2 different things. Also, I saw a fetus in there to. When you look at the fetus part, the face part sort of seems like a womans face looking at it.

I had alot of dreams like this. It reminds me of what preetom said about being pulled upward. In my dream it was like i was learning how to control falling upward. usually I would lean back slightly to do it, was pretty fun.

Just go a little bit longer. Like if you were an athlete and you reached the limit of how tired you can get, just push a little more. The desire to stop meditating is a good clue to keep meditating, but even this mindset can turn into a problem, so just meditate a bit longer, like 5 minutes past when you wanted to stop.

Self deception and difficulty judging oneself accurately can lead to confusion along this path, because others are not able to with certainty assure you of if you are really moving towards the prize or just bsing yourself. Listening to the advise of almost anyone will be disasterous, because it will be ignorant advice, it will be "common sense" status quo" advice. The advice given about your life to you, a spiritual seeker, by anyone who is not enlightened, is not applicable to you. It is advice on how to live a system proven to fail. Even a guru may not even be as enlightened as you are, how can you even trust his advice? Doesn't this lead to a very confusing abyss of sorts. There are weird and difficult things that come up that almost no one talks about, or the advice given to overcome it is naive and is proven to not work in any way other than theory. So, how about a test to at least see if we have gone into this state, because if we have, in my experience, it causes certain things to be in play that can't simply be willed away, and this is after years and years of trying to make it work. In this godhead state, lets imagine you are walking around deep in "zen". Now.... do some math. Can you hold the godhead no matter how long you do math? Like, go to work and do a duty that involves your non reptilian brain, and see if you can hold the zen. Though many have claimed they can, It seems to be impossible. If i sit, left alone, in peace, I can imagine and hold equanimity toward all the possible things that could happen, even the idea of immersing my mind in things that will break me out of the godhead, but thats just imagining. In actuality, as it happens, as you listen to somoene talk for 30 minutes about nonsense, can you hold that deep state? I honesty have deeply tried and found unless I go into a state where I would appear to be catatonic, I can't, its never that deep satisfying state. So i guess the test is, can you feel like a huge shift in your state as you start doing things that involve words and numbers, having conversations with people. can you feel it in your body. Maybe I'm just wierd but this is how it goes for me. Like if i sit in peace, and then someone talks to me like enough, I can feel myself leaving the state. I have also practiced trying to hold it through all that, but if the mental stimulation is long enough, it gradually pulls me out. IF you have never noticed this phenomenon, you may have not gone into the state yet. I noticed this phenomenon at play, I would zen walk, then have a brief talk, then walk, I go out and back in each time. If the convo was short enough, I wouldn't even come out, but my convo skills would be very simple, spacy, and people would look at me as if i were odd. But my "normal" was in, rather than out. however, i found myself in cirumstances where I had to converse almost all day long, i felt immense pain and tightening in the heart as I came "out", and eventually I was out enough to where "out" was my normal, and it sucked balls lol. Now I find myself going back to having in zen be more my normal, and noticing this, almost irritibility and pain when someone takes you out of it, and t hen deep peace going back in. I also witnessed at least 1 other person Wim Hof, trying to converse with a logical minded person coming out of his breathing, and seeming to not be in any way attuned to linguistics at that point, in a way that seemede very relatable.

I used to love breathing meditation, and engaged in it with a lot of reckless intensity. IT seemed to yield great benefits, especially in the moment experiencing euphoria and also working through blockages, finding depths and heights of beauty and intensity. At one time I referred to it as "getting high on your own supply". At times I would notice that in a way my behavior was not that much different than an addicts, and I would experience anger and resentment at anyone or experience blocking my ability to experience this. Eventually my breath openened up enough to stay open, and my breath stayed big and full for years. You notice many strange things, and find strange experiences like explaining to your boss that you actually can't wear your pants tight, and that is why your clothing looks sloppy. Your breath is that important. It yielded great benefits, including eradicating fears and behaviors that had I gone through conventional means never would changed, it's like I became a new person. Now during intense deep breathing(the way i always did it, the closest thing would be the wim hof method, but without holding your breath, just continuing the deep breathing as often as possible, while watching the flow of feeling energy moving up and moving it through everything it seems to be blocked by, even all day if you can.) there were times my whole being resisted it, and some kind of inner "knowing" said that it was just part of my psyche trying to prevent the ego death etc, or fear of going through the really deep emotions. While that may be true, I can help but think also my body was worried about like some kind of nerve damage. It turns out, I do now have a lot of unatural feelings in my body, mostly in my face and heart, that feel odd enough that I wouldn't be suprised if they were some type of nerve damage. I have not done serious breathing work in over a year, and I find this yearning and desire to get back into it again. It is true that the breathing itself makes the symptoms feel much better, but am I like burning my nerves out here or something, am I getting pleasure now at the expense of nerve damage later? I haven't gotten into it again yet, but when I have gone into my breath somewhat lately, it isn't like it was years ago, it isn't crazy intense bilssful light colored movement, its just kinda full clear breath but sort of normal and no beautiful intense energy there. Theres not really anythign visual to go with it, not lights etc. Is this justr because I haven't gone deeply into it enough again? There is like this reluctance to go deep into that again, and I;m trying to figure out if this is a wise or unwise reluctance. for me its not as though I sit and do breathing excercises for 10 minutes, I end up doing it all the time as I do other things, ideally walking. Anyone who knows a lot about this have any thoughts or insights? Should I go back into breath full force, am I now past that, did I do damage, etc. Another caveat, it is possible a lot of the uncomfortable sensations are just known more during this time of deep breath, ability to feel deeply. Because at times i would feel pain in my heart when it was appopritate, while others claimed they could not feel that, as though they were numb. So maybe that pain was not caused by breathing meditation but I was just more conscious of pain that made sense and was healthy? Like I can easily go shallow with myself and not feel wierd, but then I also cannot feel deep bliss etc. thanks gang

Free will is actually the secret "hiding in plain site" fortress of the ego. No matter how practical or rational person is, they will put up a blind spot and defy all logic to believe they have free will, their logic and reasoning suddenly disappears for this 1 thing. People want to engage in religion, search for god, truth, whatever, but they never get there because they also want free will. Who wants free will, the ability to control, determine it's own destiny, some kind of power and control in life? Is that an entity of some sort? If it can do that, it would have to be in no way connected, affected by, or related to any of the rest of existence. Wouldn't any sort of mechanism of choice or movement or action or anything have to in some way exist as some kind of form or phenomenon? Wouldn't it in some way exist as like a quality or appearance? Wouldn't it be as much not you as like a wall you're looking at?

Imagine if you didn't have to try, and your natural behavior was what was needed to provide for yourself, thats how it is for an animal. So yeah, I envy a bird who just naturally wants to fly around and swoop down at things it see moving around on the ground. It doesn't have an inner conflict over what to do, it doesn't have a desire that contradicts what needs to be done, and thus has to force himself to do things. It just naturally does what makes sense at the time. An animals mind is automatically in the moment, if it's not in pain right now, its fine. How often do you think it will be in pain? maybe a few times in it's life, the rest of the time all is well.

that first one is awesome

Start walking around and get present, breath a bit deeper and go into your breath. Now don't try to come up with an idea to hard, keep your mind empty. now do this for several hours. Now flirt with something you want to be creative about, and once an yout hooked in and inspired, then start thinking about it, but keep your body engaged. Keep your mind really spacey and free. the walking seems to do it for me, like you can peer into your subconsious more easily into the really good stuff. Try taking one day to walk around for like 8 hours and do this, stay present and keep walking.

Ya I know what you mean, your mind sort of tricks you like that. You think you have found an effective practice, but the mind will try to gradually dull it. If you do something for a very long time, the mind will try to turn it into something it can handle doing for a very long time, by making subtle changes to it that bring it in line with what it's used to. It will try to offer you something you can believe is helping you, and also a way of thinking that supports it, but it will try to somehow neuter it and uphold the previous belief system in secrecy. In short, the mind is annoying.

Whatever happens is natural. when 99 percent don't wake up, its natural, when 1 does, its natural, just like when 1 sperm fertilizes an egg its natural, and when billions or whatever don't thats also natural.

For years(and still) I associated enlightenment with actually leaving society. To the point where if I go into a state that feels free I then would begin thinking about leaving and living in the woods. This actually brought me a sort of freedom for the past several years, as it bought me having little attachment to anything. Once tested, however, this was all found to be delusional, and the true freedom I was experiencing was being found by using a lie. During tough times I would often think of leaving everything and then countless beautiful visions and things I was hopeful for would then appear in my mind as what would be waiting for me. At times when I was actually about to leave, it felt more like death or sadness or loneliness. Now my delusion has become so clear that I can no longer access this infinite freedom feeling, and rather than being afraid of death i am terrified of this life. Any time I try to let go I feel like I am actually bound by something, money, family, etc. I am now at the door of a long life that I am not excited for, attending to things I ignored before because it didn't matter to me at all. I miss being able to have no attachement to anything. I would honestly say this is one of the lowest points in m life. I quit my job on an impulse on the past last week. My family is being supportive and will carry me through it, but I feel bad about that. I also feel bad about working anywhere. I legit feel like just laying down somewhere forever. I feel like if I could let go for real I would be ok but its like I just can't trust life like I used to. I know life does what it does and for the whole it moves in the right direction over time, but I feel like this part of life called this body might just be a sacrifice in the movement of life. I'm not suicidal but my sense that life will take care of me is gone, it might take care of me as life but this body might not fair so well. I will take any help or advice available, i just don't know what to do now, i feel like I don't belong in this life.

When he talked about not understanding what everyone was talking about, and then falling into this painful contraction that felt like hell. I had this exact thing happen a few years ago, but it has stuck, I seriously need help with reversing this. I had let go of the world but then I connected back with it in an attached kind of way. Now feeling like if I let go that much again I will be a seriously irresponsible person and it will lead to problems.

It's going to upset people I bet besides why not just live this life it won't last forever anyway. Some of my happiest times came after a time in my life when I felt like that.

What are the details and in what way are exiting.

I like this

I want to do this to btw, I'm just really worried about scaring my family.

This endeavor is being attempted to be done in a safe controlled type of way, but this isn't the type of endeavor to be successfully carried out by a safe controlling mind.

Our shared experience of the word god is a word. It could be used to refer to anything by anyone at any time, with no way of knowing for sure what anyone is really talking about or if they are referring to the same thing. So when someone says "i've figured out what god is", what does that even mean. someone can go out and be looking for god, but what is the thing they started with and questioned what it was. Did they just start with a word, like they heard the word god and thought it must refer to something important so they must find out what it is. If 1000 people use the word god they are talking about different things within their own minds. Some people may have come to known something of importance and then used the word god to describe it. This does not mean that you can then use the idea of god and find the same thing, because the word god was just used to represent it, and if you tried to do it backward you will just be finding something to attempt to fill the role of what you had heard. If you are looking for something real it won't be summoned into existence by an idea. it already would have to exist. You can just look for what is really going on, and it doesnt have to correspond to any idea you had before or any thing you were looking for a solution or answer to. I don't think you do or create anything.

Seems like a pretty cool idea.

I remember way before I knew about spiral dynamics I would observe hippies with interest. I would watch footage of the people back in the times of woodstock and be intrigued, then I would notice something odd, occasionally something would really upset them and they would get mad. I was curious about how they didn't notice they lost their peace. I didnt know it was a thing, like as described by spiral dynamics, I just thought it was odd human behavior.

hehe

Preetom you are a very good baby sitter

If order for you to experience another reality, it wouldn't really be another reality because by you experiencing it, it would be part of this reality.