Mulky

@Matt8800 , I have been using your practice and it has been helping. I just need a couple small pointers. How should I look upon this parasitic phenomenon, what is the most useful/honest/empowering way of looking at it. It seems feeling a sense of resistance or anything like that is not the way to go, and if i look at it as some nasty thing that I hate, it just seems to fuel it. The gratitude and breathing worked like a charm, the visualization doesn't need to be purposely done for me as the golden inner light thing is just already happening when I go into deep breathing. I have put a lot into the in breath in my life, and have a good deep sense of it, but my out breath I always just let fall out. I have never been able to feel or experience much with breathing out bad energy/tension. Any tips on that would also be appreciated. One other small tidbit. When I can sense someone is wasting my time/life/attention, ie being an energy vampire, I get highly annoyed. I know thats what their doing, wasting both of our times, but I also know they don't consiously know it. Since we last spoke, I have been more vigilante about how this weird chaotic energy is in people just trying to waste everyones time. I catch people trying to uncenter me, distract me, it's way less than before, but still it does happen. How should I look upon people in this situation, I feel the annoyance is probably not the way to go, I try to be more stern in my boundaries but something is feeling half-arsed in my approach in this reguard. Thanks

Nah, but seriously, it is good if you can do that to overcome your fear, maybe just put your hand close to the spider at first.

Get back downstairs and let the spider crawl on your hand. You think this is a game?

@Matt8800 I just completed another session of this and it was very powerful for me, much love and gratitude from me to you.

Thanks again Matt

@Matt8800 Thanks a lot for the detailed help :). This makes alot of sense to me, I have had a strong sense lately that courage was the key for me and I feel you are right about strength and power for me. I feel like this has actually helped me turn a corner here and I really do appreciate it . This has been an issue for a long time and I wasn't sure how I would overcome it but I feel like what you said is spot on and I have had some intuitions and understandings lately that relate to what you said, thank you so much Matt

@Matt8800 Haven't had time to read this whole thread yet so this may have already been asked. I have had one obstacle that has needed to be solved for several years, aside from that, all else is well, and am curious if you can help teach me an approach to this. Since the start of this endeavour, when I first started connecting and being immersed in this beautiful pure type of existence/feeling/way the world looks, I would always encounter massive and very skillful intrustions of extremely nasty energy. Nasty energy is the best way to describe, and beautiful energy im using to describe the pure heaven on earth type existence. I have no way of knowing if this is just life happening, and the difficulties of avoiding ugliness from people, or if this is something else. I always feel this pure beauty out in nature, and not around people. When I was at my deepest of feeling that beauty, in a moment when it would spike, a nearby person would get triggered to talk about something horrible. IF i went out to the woods and meditated deep into this beauty, when I came home, my family would have all the tvs in the house on some horrible show about something really nasty. But after a large period of time mostly being in the beauty, the nasty energy came knocking on my door very loudly, and coming from all angles. Constantly i would hear about the news, I would hear complaints, everyones body language and face and everything about them was putting off energy so terrible it hurt to be around people. I then took the approach to have a good effect on others when I have to be around them, which I am doing to this day and helps alot, as well as getting as much solitude as possible. But to reverse the energy of everyone around me through me putting off good vibes with my understanding of it, feels like an insurmountable feat. I have been working on that with my family my whole life and it has done alot of good but still to this day I can watch my parents feed off negative energy. It seems deep inside i want to dwell in world of love and that good beautiful energy, and feel this is the truer purer reality, but I feel myself surrounded by massive insanity and dark angry energy. My town itself i quite thick with it(although it has been getting better latelY) All I want in life are the tools to protect myself from this horrible energy which feels like some black nasty thing in my chest, that takes the beauty away from my vision. I am tired of this constant back and forth of finding my way back into the way of existence that feels like the way we truly deserve to live, then having so many forces of sad and hurt people unconsiously trying to bring me back into this worthless muted painful state of consiousness. Can you please help me learn how to keep myself, once established in the peace and beauty, competely immune from the painful and blinding energy, thats really all i need? Thanks tldr: Need protection for me,soul,innerchild,feelings, all of that, from any influence that in any way removes me from the experience of, innocence, beauty, love, peace, truth.

I'm extremely conscious of how reasonably attractive she is

A thought is real as itself but not as something else. A thought about a red chair is real as a thought about a red chair but it's not anything other than that, it's not a red chair. When you see a car, " a car" and all the ideas about the car, are real as thoughts about the car but not as anyhthing else, they aren't anything other than themselves, nothing is. the ego is real as multiple ideas and experiences combined to form some kind of idea called the ego, but not real in the sense that it is what it claims to be. Even a lie is real, it's just not true.

When your working on this level, thinking of things as kundalini, dmt, or even your nervous system will make it harder to percieve it at a certain level of clarity depth and realness. Just experience it, without a thing or word making it into something. Doing that, making something overwhelming into something tiny by making it an idea, is better for working with things you want to take the power out of.

You have a real shell silverstein thing going on there

please delete this post of mine

ya some at first, and then occasionally some kind of desire to move even to this day. All you do is sit still and observe the movement or feeling that is inside propelling you to move, watch it move in your body without moving. Eventually it will disipate and you will get better at it. i usualy ignore the fact of my head or body slightly leaning off to one side, I personally don't care if that happens

I think the idea is that its sort of painful to live around a lot of blue and orange people. Green people are the least painful people to live around that there are a lot of. I live in a dense blue/orange area with some green, and the vibe can literally feel painful at times, although I'm starting to overcome that. I would like to live in the pacific northwest, although I have considered organizing all sorts of festivals in my town to inject some more life into it.

Which of these 3 can be known? Being cannot be known, it can only be existed as. Consiousness cannot be known, it can only be existed as. Bliss can be known. The bliss we are concerned with is the true bliss of being-consiousness bliss. If this is the only aspect that can be witnessed, then once this bliss is known at least once, maybe it is best to pursue this bliss within, as the most reliable beacon of all observable things.

I should probably add though, all i ever did, was extremely deeep in breath, while feeling the upward movement and expansion and opening up, and all the feelings, and usually just letting the breath fall out. But the breath will eventually get quite huge and slow, then at times you just stop and watch the breath, and alternate.

Yes, when i started using my breathe, I was experiencing all kinds of beautiful dreamy beauty from beyond unspeakable yadda yadda type stuff off and on all day. I was also alternating from heavenly to hellish states many times within a short period of time. If your not tripping balls through your breath yet, you might(or might not) want to look into it. Unspeakable high and beauty through mindfulness and breath. Very instense and often sometimes painful. None of this is happening for me anymore, even when I do a decent amount of breath stuff. Working through deep pain into sublime joy, in 1 breath, up through all of you, not sure you can keep it up your whole life but it seems to play a part in the path and can be very fun. Also, for me, i Just did it all the time. I would have sitting sessions, but mostly i would just do it all day unless I had gone unconscious for a while. To kick start the whole thing, 1 very long session might be good. That is what I did, might be why it worked for me, or maybe just a concidence. And im talking like several hours with small breaks when you also meditate but not with your breath. You will find barriers in you that DO NOT want to do it, and will tell you to stop, push through. Now you basically are high on dmt for a few years enjoy.

How do you all feel about this? this originally came from David Hawkins, who strikes me as a trustworthy, honest, and knowledgeable guy, still I am not completely a believer of this. Basically he could test the loc of anyone using muscle testing(trying to push someones arm down etc, and the degree of strength in the body in reaction to the truth of the statement.) Supposedly it can be used to test the truth of any statement, even if the physical participants in the experiment don't themselves consciously know the answer. It most popular use has been to test the level of consciousness of anything from music to ideologies to individual humans. There are people who have tested various gurus both alive and dead to see who had attained the highest state of consciousness. Just curious if anyone has any thoughts on this or if they can do this themselves.

I remember this guy I met while working at a school. After Knowing him for a while, one day, he told me how tired he was. Then he said, "im either going to take a nap, or do this thing i do where I just sit there and dont think or do anything for a few hours. I thought it was pretty funny, he didnt even know what he was doing or anything.

spend alot of time not doing anything, not stimulating yourself, not trying to find any pleasure or satisfaction from anything, just sit there, or walk there and accept how things are. train your mind to percieve subtlety. Sit in a calm room and just like stare at a wall and listen to nothing, things like that.

are you saying the effect of the negative wave will be felt no matter what?

instead of universe Ill say existence(everything) It's self correcting and reharmonizing. ultimately everything is in true harmony, but rapid changes cause a sort of short term disharmony. Imagine an animal evolving through a weird and awkward phase, during that time period, it will be painful and awkward, for those beings. This is the pain experienced during an awkward transition, caused by a rapid change, needing a reaction to fulfill it's perfect fit with the rest of existence. normally the water in a bathtub would sit rather still, but drop something in it and everything in the tub will move around to maintain everythings relation to everything else. So the whole of existence cares and moves for the whole of existence, and relative lack of harmony or congruence or grace gets corrected over time. Take 1 tiny part of existence though, and expect things to be a certain way for that thing, and prepare to be suprised, we don't really know what's in store for anything, and we don't truly know whats best for anything. If a tree dies, before its natural lifespan, its not as though existence, had forsaken it, its just that its moving all as 1 thing, and in the whole, that tree had to die. Eventually existence works it's way past using pain and fear, as things autocorrect. Pain always causes change that alleviates pain, even if it takes eons. Although pain on one level is true, it is ultimately a sign that something is wrong, or at least not as right as it could be. This pain and suffering cause subtle changes in life that lead to it's alleviation, even if the solution is extinction, a system of pain and suffering cannot last, as it pokes everything around it on the shoulders and asks for change, even if it takes millions of years. Through evolution of life, of everything, of the interconnectedness of everything, life autoheals. But individual things sometimes are doomed in a way, living as their part in the overall change. If you align yourself with a force seemingly opposed to life(most of society, most jobs), you will be at odds with life itself, which is infinitely more powerful but in subtle ways people ignore. If you align with life, the universe or existence or life, that great power will be on your side. but existence is working for the whole thing, so any small part of existence is subject to any kind of fate as it fits the whole.