somegirl

I don't like when I ask someone politely something (like "Can I grab a cup of juice from your fridge?" and their answer is "No." (but in reality they mean yes but want to be funny or sarcastic) You just create awkward situation where I supposedly don't know what to do, but I was polite enough to ask because it's not mine. I don't get that kind of reaction. Just answer normally, if I'm at least being polite in the first place.

It's interesting to me that one friend wants me to meet my ex best friend and meet her baby, when I have 0 desire to do so. For many reasons. First reason I won't mention because it might seem petty, but it actually showed me what she thought of me. To me that's valid reason anyway. Second reason - when I saw her in person one time randomly, she acted as if we're meeting for the first time. She was so freaking awkward, looked at phone when talking to me, was awkwardly smiling at me... And we used to be BEST friends lol. Like, get a grip girl. It was so bad and it made me feel like I'm bothering her. Third reason - When it was my birthday, she didn't send me any message. I expected at least that much. We don't talk at all, but at least I expected her to respect what we used to have and congratulate me considering I was also congratulating her every occasion (engagement, birthday, marriage)... And she couldn't take 2 minutes out of her day to congratulate my birthday that she knew I had? Bye. So I would like my friend to stop mentioning her. We're officially done. I saw her not making any effort to let me know she cares, not even a little. I'm not interested in anything related to her. I don't wanna see her or her baby nor am I interested in her life anymore. She doesn't ask about mine so why would I want to know about hers. I will maybe tell my friend that, if I notice her pushing that idea too much.

I know this thread is meant for things I want, but I also think, paradoxically, that you also have to know what you don't want.

I think I have deep rooted beliefs that prevent things from happening... First one is that I don't inherently believe someone THAT good looking could be actually interested in something serious with me. Second one is that I don't actually beleive that the universe is handling everything to my favour. I feel that I don't trust the universe. This is why things are not happening as smooth, or the way I want.

I have actually started doubting this menifesting ability... I got approached 4 times last night and got messaged by anyone BUT him. I don't know. On the other hand, I assume he rarely uses phone because he travels a lot to the nature. And there might not be any signals. But even if that's not the case... I think I want this to happen a little too much. Maybe I should chill out.

@Salvijus Hahah thanks. Happy easter and all best

Hahahh, no, not you!

Some random guy approached me on the street here in Belgrade and asked me to kiss me because he thought I was cute lol. I think that only can happen here. I declined. I want someone else's attention. ✅ I want S to message me.

Lol manifested the wrong guy I actually wanted one particular guy to message me and I was setting the intention and then the other guy messaged me, also someone I used to find interesting but after the second guy I don't find him AS interesting. However we had okay conversation and we talked about meeting each other. He is fine. I just wanted the other guy to talk to me. I find him very interesting. ✅ I want a guy with SK initials to message me. Universe knows which one I refer to.

Well it's kinda funny that Leo made a video just now about how not to be scammed, cheated, exploited... Background story - this guy is a classic fuckboy and hurt me a lot when I was still in love with him. I opened up my heart to him one day and said I cannot keep seeing him because I want commitment, but he didn't. I was being honest and fair. However he kept doing what he wanted with me and kept hurting me (I don't know if it was intentional or did he simply not care) until I finally decided I deserve more and cut him out of my life completely. Didn't even want to say hi to him on the street. After 2 years of us not talking, last friday he sent me a message. He asked me why I cut him out. I was pretty cold and rude towards him when talking but I told him a few situations which made me feel used and not cared about and... To my surprise he said sorry and he felt bad. He said that was the last thing he wanted -to see me broken and he doesn't like hurting people just because he leads this "specific lifestyle". He said he only remembers good stuff when he sees me. It warmed my heart to see that he felt sorry. After all, I suffered deeply because of his lack of consideration for my feelings back then. I said that it was okay. But in the back of my mind, I am still not sure what he wants from me. Is he truly sorry and has has good intentions. Or is he just being malicious and wants to use me again like he did when I was younger.

✅ I want for things to come to me. I want things I wish for (I don't count intrusive thoughts. I choose which thoughts count.) to just come to me somehow. This or that way. Money? People contact me to pay me. Love and relationships? Guys come to me. Friendships? I meet people randomly and unexpectedly make new friends if I want new ones.

@Kshantivadin Set your intention. Write down your wish. Or daydream how it feels like when you have such social life. Keep high frequency most of the time. And let go. Friends have always come into my life without me forcing them. In every stage of my life. It's effortless. When you don't need something to happen, it happens. Edit: Be fine even if it never happens. Be like "I'm fine whatever happens, I am happy no matter what".

✅ I want to live carefree life where things just effortlessly work out for me. I truly want this.

When I'm not stingy, then also good things happen. Like for example I didn't feel sorry that I spent a lot of money on wax and straps, ans then I got bonus body oil because I purchased all that. Of course I don't wanna spend money I don't have to spend. There should be a balance. Like for example I wouldn't call myself stingy for not wanting to spend 114€ (plus other stuff) on a trip to Kladovo. I thought that was not necessary and I'm a student who doesn't have a job so I don't know how a STUDENT organization expects me to pay that money. Go away.

I noticed that when I simply don't care, things go my way. When I don't stress about the outcome, things go the way they should. I simply choose to not stress or care. I just elt things happen. If it happens happens if it doesn't, then oh well.

✅ I want to feel alive. I want to live life to the fullest. I want to experience things. I want to love everything I see.

✅ I want to meet this guy... He seems i intriguing. He has these interesting facial expressions I was talking about in this journal. I find it super attractive. Also he freaking has muscles and abs. Not too bulky, but JUST right. He travels, plays guitar, appreciates every genre of music... Knoes when to be serious and when to joke around (his words). The last part was something I wished for after exiting my last rs. Because I noticed that it bothers me when someone jokes around all the time and doesn't know when to hold serious conversations. I think you need to have social intelligence in order to distinguish the two. Anyway it feels good to daydream about potential partner. Even if it doesn't come true. I was able to feel good on my own without that person so... Lol. It just feels so good the last time I did it. Now I'm just listening to rock and I feel good. Wanna learn more about it.

Oh yeah, I forgot to report something very important that happened to me yesterday... So... I decided to randomly comment on some guy's post after seeing that he plays one of my favorite songs on a guitar... And then... He commented with some emoticon that he never used on other comments. I thought that was interesting. Then I started kinda thinking about him randomly... Then the next day, he sent me a message ? I was like... Damn, I manifested this lol. And he's not just any guy, he's like SUPER freaking hot. Works out and stuff. And plus travels and plays guitar (so and artist like me). We are from different places but actually pretty close, it's not a long drive. He then told me that we can go to upcoming big rock festival together that will be in my city (I'm not sure if he was serious or was he just being flirty and then moved on). I told him "so you're gonna just come here alone, without your friends?" And he replied "I'm not alone, I got you." I said "but we didn't meet each other yet" and he said "we will". Me: "So you bought tickets already?" Him: "No, we will buy it together" Lol. It was interesting and kinda freaky because I was just thinking about him randomly previously. Plus he seems super handsome and good guy judging from his videos he posted (he posts vlogs). I don't know... We will see, but I will just continue doing ans thinking things that make me feel good ✨

I don't want to have depressive/angry resting face... I just don't want to hold negative energy in myself. I don't want to be pessimistic like certain people I know. I don't want to be like certain people in my close environment.

Hmm tricky... I would say if you like going out with them still, go out, but also that doesn't stop you from seeking new group of friends you can also go out with.

❤️ Yes, feel the same, it's kinda special. But also sad that it was just a dream lol. Hmm, interesting... I don't know how though. You were more passionate about being there for yourself after such dream? But that's a good way to look at it. I guess you're your own best friend and enemy. ?❤️?

One new girl that joined my group of friends yesterday in a night-out was acting so freaking weird, I freaking hated it. I hated absolutely everything. The way she was behaving, talking to me, expressing her thoughts... I told her I'm not drinking because I want to not drink as much when I'm going out and then 5 mins she ordered me alcohol.... Freaking disregarded everything I said and bought a drink. Wtf, are you okay girl? Also she was making unnecessary awkwardness when I mentioned that, when I do decide to drink here and there, I only order one brand of beer that I like and can tolerate (because I'm sensitive to alcohol). She looked at me and then at others weidly, and then annoyingly started speaking in different tone so she can almost embarass me in front of my friends because "all beers are the same". I mean, you could tell me that in a normal way you know? You don't have to draw attention to me in such a weird way. I don't understand why she was looking at me like I'm saying something outrageous. Like, fuck you. I hate people who feel the need to embarass others and put them down in order to look better or cool or "smarter". Also hate people who do not listen to what I'm saying. I said I don't drink vodka and she orderer me one. I'm glad when she left. May she not come back.

Okay so... On the other side, you don't have to engage with people you find difficult to conversate with, you know? Or even pay attention to them. I for example do not even read comments when I see certain usernames. It's easy. If someone is really crossing the line, you can either talk it out with some of the mods (so far mods I've talked to were all pretty cool) or use "ignore" option. There are going to be people in life who want to tear you down and won't like you, and vise versa, but that's just life. You know yourself that you are more sensitive than an average person, so knowing that, you can do things that can help you prevent yourself from feeling bad. You identify stuff that make you sensitive and then take appropriate precautions in order to avoid the unwanted.

@thisintegrated On another note, this debate of Leo being russian, therefore this is "russian forum", and he is biased etc... So anyone who has close relations to Russia has no validity because they are russian, just because of current situation... Grow the f up ya'll. I can't believe people have this simplified way of looking at life as things were black and white... Especially on a forum who attracts people who supposedly want to better themselves.