The0Self

Sounds like you have a lot of integrity, self awareness, and experience, but this idealistic approach of yours is no small impediment and you’d be well served to not place so much importance on sex. Do you want 1. sex to retain its meaningfulness in exactly the way you describe, or 2. do you want to find the best long term partner? It’s not like you can’t try to do both, but if #2’s importance eclipses #1’s (not saying it does for you), then act accordingly. And be aware when you are acting from fear of your heart getting broken. Oftentimes facing your fears gets you what you really want.

Bananas and peaches do this to me. It could be related to a deviated septum as well (especially if you’ve ever broken your nose), as it was in my case.

?

Just make sure that whenever you eat, you’re eating protein — that’s the main thing. Intermittent fasting does not appear to have benefits outside of calorie restriction but at least for some it’s a very effective way to do that with ease.

It’s a health supplement as well as a performance supplement. One of the safest and most effective dietary supplements. May even have cognitive benefits for the elderly

Lead and mercury are the primary concern — that’s basically what is meant by “heavy metals.” Especially mercury. Cadmium and arsenic to a lesser degree as well but even those aren’t nearly as problematic as lead and mercury. The main reason to take DMSA (and/or ALA) is to attempt to lessen or rid the body of lead and mercury.

❤️

If you burped, would you be full? Not unless you ate prior. On the other hand, if duality is seen through, a side-effect is no longer believing you’re special. But the side-effects of seeing through duality probably can’t themselves be used to see through duality. Seems like a nice cheat code — if only it would work. To see through duality, you simply have to see through duality. How? Simply by desiring the truth more than the false. That’s basically all that’s required. This could maybe be cultivated through attempting self inquiry (or surrendering voluntary action and inaction) as much as possible, until the frustration of not getting anywhere with it prompts you into doing it literally all the time. The activities that seem to prevent you from doing it are simply the attachments standing in the way. In the end, you can’t actually do surrender, because you already are fully surrendered, and that’s exactly where the frustration comes from — you’re trying to do what you are; what is already the case. Healing trauma is definitely worthwhile though.

Nice! Ketamine can be more powerful than 5-MeO-DMT but in an entirely different way. Definitely one of my favorites. Don’t settle for cheap RC dissociatives like deschloroketamine — standard RS-ketamine is where it’s at. Or methoxetamine from what I’ve heard, but I think MXE has basically vanished from the face of the earth.

When it's obvious that the place where you are, is not somewhere you arrived at -- it's where you came from. Sort of. It's not a place you go to from here, it's where you never even really left from.

This is only a play, but it writes sins, not tragedies... in a sense ?... But all sin is merely ignorance (knowing something which is not true). Step into the “light” of non-ignorance and all sin is already forgiven because there was no sin to forgive.

That’s definitely a nice inquiry

^^^ The only "dead end" would be thinking oneself to be fully enlightened. As long as that thinking doesn't happen, one is at the very least not bound by the aforementioned dead end.

1. Ask your self “am I actually ‘something’?” Then... Notice that you aren’t actually hearing this, even though it very likely will seem that you are. And of course no one notices that — because there isn’t anyone. 2. Or pray to God and see how you’re unable to see that there’s God praying to itself via an imaginary human, even though you are that. It’s hard to accept (not even possible for self) that things don’t matter. Hard... Raw. You aren’t alone in going through that (story). There being no more battles can take some getting used to. No need to rush into that.

In a way yeah it’s like there’s only one thing and you are that. But really it’s much more absolute... but simultaneously nothing. It’s not even really like bang you’re liberated... It’s more like all the sudden it’s recognized that the search is already over. (Might sound the same but those are quite different.) It really is a fading out of the grasping madness of truth seeking.

Even small amounts will raise tolerance but if you didn’t feel anything then you could probably get full effects whenever. But since you felt something, I’d definitely wait 7-10+ days IF you’re wanting strong effects. Mushroom tolerance doesn’t seem to be quite as bad as LSD, as for that it’s best to wait 12-14 days.

? Can attempt to describe it in many ways. One way to put it: the revelation that there is already only completeness. Not even that. Inescapable boundless completion. Simply and utterly no need for more or less of this or that.

When you reach what you’re pointing to, the whole world wakes up with you. No one is asleep while you’re awake. There’s no one to help. It doesn’t make sense.

1) How long are you into spiritual path? 7-8 years, but the path didn’t really start until the last ~2 — that’s an important distinction. In my estimation, once the path to truth-at-all-costs begins, it ain’t taking more than a few years at the most... ? it would be unbearable... unless detouring massively. Once the path starts, a hallmark I can illuminate is: embarrassment of your own naivety 3 days ago, on a constant running basis — it’s that swift — i.e. it ain’t taking 20 fucking years. 2) How many trips on psychedelics have you experienced? And what psychedelics? Hundreds. Lots of psychedelics (practically all of them aside from obscure research chems, though I’ve tried some of those too) and some dissociatives. Favorites include: LSD-25, 5-MeO-DMT, RS-ketamine, N,N-DMT. 3) How often do you meditate? Automatically (without any intention or effort) nearly all the time, but an occasional 10 minute sit every now and then. Used to sit up to 5 hours a day — Jhana access, witnessing, noting, etc. Learned primarily from Culadasa’s TMI, and also STF and TWIM and many others like Kenneth Folk and Daniel Ingram, Buddha/Sutras, etc. Ramana style inquiry; Witnessing; etc. Adyashanti... etc etc... 4) Has your life gotten better or worse? How? Literally a different order of being. Incomparable to what I was before. Nothing that makes sense on either side makes sense on (or relates to) the other. But before the path resolved so completely, I followed a book called Seeing That Frees by Rob Burbea as an adjunct to my meditation practice, and I would say I was about 10x happier than I was before getting skilled at meditation. I did a Metta practice during daily activities — this seemed to be associated with my relationships seeming to magically fall perfectly into place in easy flow. Highly recommend Metta, though I don’t really practice these days. Anything that uncovers the underlying natural flow of the dream-world-universe = good. Don’t underestimate how powerful meditation can be. If you are unaware that some of the states access-able in meditation are more intensely blissful than the cleanest drugs in existence, well now you know — believe it or not. There’s more to life than meditation, but having access to clean and as-overwhelming-as-you-want bliss at any given time? Or even some modicum of that? It can change you in a really nice way, and allows you to move onto other things. That had nothing to do with enlightenment, though at the time I was quite sure it did. Buddhist paths to enlightenment hardly make sense to me anymore... To wake up, you simply must want to wake up to truth at all costs, and that’s literally all there is to it! ? Keep on going until the end of knowledge and seeking is reached — nothing further to know, literally. And not even that, really. And it actually does not make sense — that may well be the strangest part about this. 5) What are your main insides, want advice could you give to others? This is the entire whole. Alone. Already. It’s funny how many times I heard that yet didn’t (couldn’t) even hear it. There is only God’s plan — play. Plan is rather misleading as it suggests time — there is only timeless infinite creation; play. If you’ll excuse the word God — it’s not important. Your whole problem as a seeker is that: You actually are not seeing what cannot be simpler! Right now... It’s like there’s the pretense of not getting a joke. You aren’t “the void and not the play.” You light up both and are everything but not anything in particular. There’s no fixed you witnessing what’s appearing. There’s just what appears, it’s everything, there’s no separate person, and what appears isn’t actually something that appears. There’s no it. If you think you’ve been seeking truth, and you think you’ve been doing it for more than 3 years, then your next step is to realize you’ve really been doing something other than seeking truth. The only truth is that there is truth — I am THAT I am. To want enlightenment is to misunderstand it. Any claim to knowledge is a confession of ignorance.

Yeah, I experienced similar, especially with ketamine. Really it was just indescribable though. The spiritual ego is the one who believes that whatever it is experiencing or doing, whether positive or negative, has some higher purpose. There is no need to end it. When it is fully exited, it's seen that it's either that or nothing, so you go back in, and everything is exactly the same but seen as appearance rather than truth -- although since truth is all there is, appearance is not separate from truth. A non-I living in a non-world, but what you really are is not of the world. There can still be the appearance of higher purpose, in a sense... It's just not for anyone.

That kind of stuff really does seem to work. More "integrated living" in general can be quite fruitful. Prayer works too, especially inward prayer for alignment with truth, rather than prayer to an external God for some personal benefit.

I figured so, but even still, the distinction I made is a meaningful one. And it seemed to me you were indicating that there really is a self, which is not the case. The integrated state of true self I speak of is a less contracted way of being than that of being ego-bound. The higher self you speak of though (absolute/God) isn’t higher in the same way, because it’s simply all there is and has no discernible qualities, other than the limitlessness of having no qualities. I just simply wouldn’t ever refer to the ultimate (God) as higher self, because it really isn’t higher — i.e. it’s just Self or consciousness without other — and considering there also does appear to be an illusory higher self, the absolute isn’t illusory and thus isn’t said illusory higher self. To be clear, I’m not disagreeing, just making an additional distinction.

If it's quality, 100-125ug will be an utterly incredible experience. Then it was likely weaker than advertised. Or perhaps some medication may be blocking it to some degree. Sometimes with 110-140ug, I could hardly see the room I was in, because the visual effects and the senses were so bright and intense.

Secure Score Mother/CG1: Anxiety: 1.00 | Avoidance: 2.17 Score Father/CG2: Anxiety: 1.67 | Avoidance: 1.50 Score Partner: Anxiety: 1.67 | Avoidance: 2.67

Both are, but higher self is a far more integrated and interesting playpen, which I can only recommend... to everyone.