Vrubel

@Leo Gura Can you send the old "..?" if she is not replying or is that too demanding?

Just to give you an idea. This is a relatively affordable piece.

I understand why you would say that, but on almost every date I make out with the girl. I stimulate her (in respectful ways) and play cute games where we hold eye contact for as long as possible. The last girl I dated told me I had soft lips and when I finished making out she almost fell over forward because she wanted more. I guess I am just a little bit wounded at the moment.

@Leo Gura Unfortunately, that's not my experience. I had that very rarely where there were two dates back to back within a reasonable time span. I find those are the girls who are most unwounded, secure and freaky(; . But for the most part, I could have had a date with an absolute soulmate. But if there was no sex I will be treated with zero respect via text. I mean ignoring, leading me on, and flaking. Sure she might even go on a date again, but when, next year?

@UDT @Leo Gura Oh, it's easy being a leader when you're one-on-one with the girl. Good luck texting her after the date though (if there was no sex). All the leadership of the world won't help you then. The truth is that all girls will happily have sex on the first if they get stimulated. A girl can justify anything. I literally had a (bad) date with a girl where she lectured me about how she doesn't kiss on the first date because of principles but also told me that when she first met her ex "they had such great energy" and were boyfriend and girlfriend on the first day they met.

That's the thing: Girls just don't seem to commit to consistently dating. They will punish you by being flaky and playing games for not having had sex on the first date. In my experience, it's the other way around. My chances go down dramatically after every date. Even if the dates are very good and romantic.

I had the most honest and wholesome dates with women while at the same time being very emotionally stimulating. Yet if we don't have sex on the first date my chances of getting the girl goes down dramatically. How girls fall for guys is all ass-backward. My advice is not to have sex on the first date but nonetheless commit to dating the guy. That way you'll know him better how he consistently is.

I am all in for authenticity and integrating feminity but at the same time, there is also something to be appreciated about the contrast between true men and true women. It's something I admire in Eastern European societies. When it comes to gender dynamics I want the baseness of an Eastern European society minus the toxic masculinity/macho stuff and more tolerance towards outlying sexualities.

Macho no, but masculine yes. Just to explore that part of myself to be a more balanced guy. Masculinity is to a large degree developed (at least for me it is). So I need to get that out of the way as a young man. Then I will become God(; Sure my body manipulations are not strictly necessary but they help a lot, it's just a practical thing.

@docs20 If you want to get more in touch with your ballsy, dominant and overall more masculine side. Before a date or going a night out, try masturbating (a little) without cumming. This will require practice, control and awareness but for me at least it's not that hard to do. Just use pics instead of vids. Eventually, you'll reach a point where you can masturbate for a very long time without cumming and you'll still get all of that sexual energy pumped into your body. But you also don't want to overdo this.

Which is exactly the right-wing criticism of what trans people are doing: trying to fit in and be more "cool". Fitting into stereotypes is what all right-wingers love to do. No, I meant keeping your masculine force in check not repressing any gay/trans urges if you have those. The challenge for most heterosexual (young) men (irregardless of right/left-wing) is twofold: 1. How to get in touch with your powerful authentic masculinity. 2. Once there, how to contain and express it in healthy ways. It's more a balancing of forces, the primal vs the civilized if you will.

"right-winger" or not, a lot of (young) men are insecure about their masculinity. Most even don't know what authentic masculinity is and how to attain it. Masculinity definitely has a dangerous reckless side that must be controlled. But ironically keeping that force in check makes you even more masculine, that is what makes you "cool". To be honest I never heard about men taking hormones. But before dates, I do manipulate my body via a masturbation technique to gain testosterone/masculinity (and even creativity). If I didn't do that seducing/turning on women would be so much harder. Maybe a cool new topic. "How to get in touch with your authentic masculinity".

She is a pretty university student that just moved to my town. Is she shopping for a new lover or does she just want a cool guy to entertain her because she is bored and lonely in the new town? We already had an instant date but only later she mentioned her boyfriend. She is obviously attracted to me and I do project sexual energy (we click well). So she should (and will) sense that I am "a threat". But of course, I do not want to have sex with her if she is in a happy relationship. I only will do that if she already broke up with him (small chance but possible) or she clearly states to me that she isn't happy with him and has the intention of breaking up. I am going out with her on Friday, how, if, and when do I ask about her boyfriend situation? I don't want it to be awkward nor make her close off to me (as not to be perceived as slutty or a cheater).

@Hello from Russia@Tyler Robinson@Leo Gura@NoSelfSelf@integral She is a cute little PhD student. In my book that's as high quality as they come. From her perspective, she did nothing wrong by just meeting me up and she did honestly say that she got a boyfriend beforehand. But yeah we do click very well, we talked about interesting intelligent topics. We also had very solid eye contact throughout, and I did manage to get some minor physical escalation. She wants me, but to be honest I am not sure how to continue with her. She still got her feminine coyness so If I do nothing, nothing will happen.

Update: So I went on the date. Was just a fun night out drinking. She has definitely some issues with her boyfriend (we talked about it) and there was definitely tension between us. But I don't see anything happening in the near future. She is more of a long-term prospect. I won't put any effort into pursuing her. She stated she wants to see me again but I will let her send the "after-date text" otherwise nothing will happen and it will end here. At least for the near future.

@flowboy @Federico del pueblo @Leo Gura Thanks for the comment. I will go and report back. (Not a promise though) An important detail is that she is new in town and here for the long run. Her boyfriend is probably left behind relatively far away in another country. I am talking Holland-Belgium, it's not that far away but still kinda unpractical to travel there regularly.

@petar8p Yeah, I think I am just going to ask

@NoSelfSelf I am not a "gay male friend". We have serious polarity and I accept nothing less. I do mind her having a boyfriend that's why I started this thread.

@NoSelfSelf To be honest I just want to feel the waters and see. I am no saint but I am definitely no simp either. @universe I think I will just explore and not overthink this issue. I am currently also dating another girl that has put me on hold due to exam deadlines. I really like her so if she flakes it will be a very hard hit for me, so exploring other options is here the best thing to do to not feel needy or crushed if she flakes.

I don't feel my dignity is on the line by meeting up with her. I have a hard line against interfering in a happy relationship though an unhappy dying one is a grey area for me. I will communicate this clearly to her if it ever comes so far but I don't assume I will be having sex with her. My main question is how do I communicate with her on this issue? What does that mean? future lover? is that a bad thing?

I am writing this post half as a joke because my life doesn't revolve around getting laid, pursuing my passions is way more important. But I am seriously considering taking a pet snake. Something like a false coral snake. I already admitted my fascination for snakes to various girls I dated. And to be honest, how they reacted was entirely based on how much they were into me. If a girl was sufficiently into me she thinks it's "cool". But I also had some mediocre dates where the girl was visibly turned off by the idea of snakes and creatures of the like, "Ewww" they would softly say. Anyhow each time I will bring a girl home the snake will definitely get some attention. I don't know how feminine girls will react to that and whether they'll still be in the mood haha.

In the near future copywriting on its own won't be a viable profession due to AI. Nowadays to make a text or article all you have to do is to run AI and make some corrections. If that's what you want to do, think more broadly. For example, instead of a copywriter be a marketing communication expert or a community manager. Just to name a few things. A more directing role is needed.

That's not what I said. It's not about the hours per day. Think more broadly, complexly and with vision I understand it's very hard to do so without outside responsibility. That's why you have no choice but to develop vision and immense inner strength. Yellow is very intellectual. But it doesn't seem you are applying that to managing your life or having a worldview/philosophy you can draw comfort and satisfaction from. Why are your thoughts so painful? because they aren't true! Also green at a young age is often just a philosophical justification for your weakness and why you are a such special snowflake. From your original post, I did get that you have a lot of pent-up masculine energy, Good! Use that and take some (smart) risks.

@Ramzi08 Lazy genes!? Never heard greater bullshit in my life. Each of your ancestors since the literal beginning of time worked his ass off just to survive and make your existence possible. You have some serious limiting beliefs, the thing about those beliefs is that they seem like solid reality. Those beliefs are illusionary bullshit, every young person (and you are really young) learns work ethic and discipline. Life forces you into it. Life is about getting stronger. The weakest mold themselves into the strongest. You're only 22 and claim to be green-yellow? focus on blue and orange. Have a deep respect for the qualities of these stages.

Haha, cool replies! Thanks for the message