gettoefl

For me it is as follows. There is nothing bad that can hurt me and nothing good that can help me. I look around with forgiveness and disenchantment, the former means don't worry about something because it's all good and latter means don't hope for anything because it's all bad. The world is a passing dance of mist on water. Nice enough, nothing special. Engaging the world with this mindset allows one to be unstoppable, untouchable and unmovable. Allied to this one sees one is not a doer, a chooser, a thinker, a feeler though doing, choosing, thinking, feeling happen naturally and smartly. I don't take credit. I enjoy the fruit, the wine, the song, the dance. The following nicely encapsulates such a mood. Forgive the typos needless to say.

Thanks. Every day is better. Life is endurance and determination. I'm on track with it.

You give them grace and leeway while protecting your space and peace. It's a tough balance. Family is how you are who you are. So you play your part.

Yes families are messy. They know our weak spot. They bring out our worst aspect. So it's always a struggle to make it work. Bit it's your blood and your mirror. So you do your best to find a way.

I don't say it's good for another. It is a hard-gained lifestyle choice to protect peace and harmony. Like they say all happy families are the same. All unhappy families are unhappy in a unique way.

I explained in copious detail. Feel free to ask if anything is unclear.

Not all. Can only speak for yourself right?

There are two ways to be in a family. One is to sometimes take initiative and sometimes reach out. The other is to do high days and holidays with them for the sake of unity and duty. I do the latter - what you might term minimal involvement. I don't support their values nor partake in their flashiness and materialism and feed it no fuel. This I suspect is a strain for them but it is a necessary step for me. I choose not to go no contact in order that they have the semblance of a functional family and maybe one day they reform their lives. I stick around them sacrificially because I love them despite who they are.

There are 2 things - truth and illusion. Believe illusion see illusion. Believe truth see truth. Faith works. You have to fortunate enough to believe truth. Which isn't easy as all you experience is illusion.

So cut off family's toxicity root and branch. Still entertain them just don't listen.

Mind mastery is everyone is perfect and I'm the problem.

Violence is arrogance and hatred manifested: I'm good, you're bad to the extent that If you stand out and I'm having a bad day I will happily hammer you into line. Everyone is violent and feels it justified and keeps it locked up. Anytime you are not in absolute peace, you sow violence inwardly then outwardly.

There are just two things and in fact they are not-two - appearance knowing itself as awareness and awareness clothing itself in appearance. So step 1 is know yourself. Don't let appearance dominate you. Abide as what is. What is, unresisted, is peace; the experience of peace is happiness and from there a good final chapter of the human incarnation is possible. And the you that you thought you were doesn't do that. It is done through you. The old you is over.

We only need care about another's opinion if they are paying our bills. If not what they say is irrelevant. If you have money, you can forge your own path irrespective of another's input. Money=freedom.

It's an attempt to remove or improve what is already unmovable. The anger, fear and control I think I have is pure madness and does nopthing except keep me stuck. My will is perfect happiness not self-defeating resistance. Nothing here needs to be different. From that clarity flows love and peace and joy.