gettoefl

You give them grace and leeway while protecting your space and peace. It's a tough balance. Family is how you are who you are. So you play your part.

Yes families are messy. They know our weak spot. They bring out our worst aspect. So it's always a struggle to make it work. Bit it's your blood and your mirror. So you do your best to find a way.

I don't say it's good for another. It is a hard-gained lifestyle choice to protect peace and harmony. Like they say all happy families are the same. All unhappy families are unhappy in a unique way.

I explained in copious detail. Feel free to ask if anything is unclear.

Not all. Can only speak for yourself right?

There are two ways to be in a family. One is to sometimes take initiative and sometimes reach out. The other is to do high days and holidays with them for the sake of unity and duty. I do the latter - what you might term minimal involvement. I don't support their values nor partake in their flashiness and materialism and feed it no fuel. This I suspect is a strain for them but it is a necessary step for me. I choose not to go no contact in order that they have the semblance of a functional family and maybe one day they reform their lives. I stick around them sacrificially because I love them despite who they are.

There are 2 things - truth and illusion. Believe illusion see illusion. Believe truth see truth. Faith works. You have to fortunate enough to believe truth. Which isn't easy as all you experience is illusion.

So cut off family's toxicity root and branch. Still entertain them just don't listen.

Mind mastery is everyone is perfect and I'm the problem.

Violence is arrogance and hatred manifested: I'm good, you're bad to the extent that If you stand out and I'm having a bad day I will happily hammer you into line. Everyone is violent and feels it justified and keeps it locked up. Anytime you are not in absolute peace, you sow violence inwardly then outwardly.

There are just two things and in fact they are not-two - appearance knowing itself as awareness and awareness clothing itself in appearance. So step 1 is know yourself. Don't let appearance dominate you. Abide as what is. What is, unresisted, is peace; the experience of peace is happiness and from there a good final chapter of the human incarnation is possible. And the you that you thought you were doesn't do that. It is done through you. The old you is over.

We only need care about another's opinion if they are paying our bills. If not what they say is irrelevant. If you have money, you can forge your own path irrespective of another's input. Money=freedom.

It's an attempt to remove or improve what is already unmovable. The anger, fear and control I think I have is pure madness and does nopthing except keep me stuck. My will is perfect happiness not self-defeating resistance. Nothing here needs to be different. From that clarity flows love and peace and joy.

Money is a tool of comparison. Make nothing or make millions. but don't tell anyone. Keep finances quiet. If you are not making ends meet you need to take stock and do better. Survival is needed and until it is figured out, nothing else matters. Forget any mind-mastery until you have a good chunk in the bank. To have money makes one invulnerable and unstoppable. To have none makes one a slave and a burden.

If you go out you get sick. Then you never get sick since you have immunity. Ask any teacher. If you stay home you never get sick. Until you start going out.

Better to celebrate failure. It is the only thing that can wake you up so that you can appreciate and enjoy that you are not the doer. Success is the lie, I am the sum of my blood sweat tears. You are not.

What's just is is justice. God loves what he made.

It's not, I'm the only one here. It's, not even I am here. But I am looking through just one pair of eyes. I cannot change what those eyes see. I can however change how those eyes see. The eyes interfere with reality as if that were worthwhile or even possible. The looker interrupts the interference. All is now well. It is ok as it is.

Good one is ask what qualities they value in the opposite sex. When they answer, say so did you ever find such a person. Or more cheeky: And how is that working out for you?

Die to someone or die as no-one. That's the choice. We feel the former is a huge loss. We are losing things that were never ours. Your family, your job, your house are not yours. To drop the yours is to drop the you. You own nothing, you author nothing, you control nothing. You can postpone the fear of death until your death bed. Or you can be free now and live in light, strength, peace, truth - all of which are your true nature always there to be availed of.

Everything is a device, religion included. A story is needed to shake one awake. What is said is done so to be helpful. To the absolute, there is nothing to change. I agree. Everything happening has to happen. But this is unhelpful and irresponsible to one who is suffering. So it is good to point the way. To give is to receive. One only ever benefits oneself and that is why one speaks or more accurately lets oneself be spoken through. Like I said, I am doing everything to myself and this life is my responsibility. And what is the way? Become aware of what you truly are. Everything I say one can become directly conscious of.

Let me take second question. The body-mind-I is not the true-I. All the body-minds you see are the projection of true-I. Body-minds have no responsibility since they are carrying out their script. True-I has created everything and so is responsible. You need to align with true-I. First question - as a body-mind-I, I can do nothing. But I can experience peace. This is the clue that I am on track and moving towards truth. Peace basically is nothing troubles me anymore. Peace is as far as the body-mind-I can go. Now I can be used by true I to communicate but I have no say in it. But a lot can get done now that I am batting for the right team. My words could move a mountain perhaps as Jesus suggested.

The meaning of the word "responsible" changes. The world does not cause unhappiness but is the effect. I blamed the world for my troubles. But I am the one who projected all this. I am responsible for what I have done and what others have done is what I made them do! And when I say "others" I am part of that group since I have projected myself here and that is why there is no doer. I am carrying out a script that I made myself do. I am responsible for myself nothing else. And the key is to stop misidentifying as the doer. You can understand it but can you realize it? This is the work. Life goes on exactly the same but you stop interfering and stop resisting. Interfere means to add to what is and resist means to oppose what is. For example, John is bad = interference. John is bad and I am angry about it = resistance. Life is happening and is fine as it is. When identification goes then truth dawns,

Likewise and thanks good man for your earnest contemplations. The point I make is, identification is the root 0f all evil. That's what needs dropping. You need to see you are not the you that you think you are. The body acts and then you claim yourself the doer. You need to notice and drop it. You are not something that can be put in words. Identification is interfering with and obscuring what is. It prevents you from seeing. Spiritual work is undoing the false I. This is what Robert Adams among many others teaches.

Everything is as conscious as I am. Being enlightened means everything is the same. The only thing I ever see is God. It is my state that accords consciousness to the world. The only world is the one I make. Perception veils consciousness. Learn to see right. Remove the scales from your eyes.