Biased much?
Don't be posting this kind of selfish crap here. Your post undermines the entire ethos of Actualized.org
Just because your people were treated badly does not give them the right to now treat others badly. That's exactly how the Nazis justified the Holocaust. You are doing the very evil you complain was done to you.

Shrimp, squid, sardine have the lowest mercury levels.
Basically the smaller the seafood the less heavy metals it will have.

The fact that you're on this forum at age 17 tells me you're off to a great start to figuring shit out.
I was 17 eight years ago with similar questions.
Time is on your side right now.
Do stuff. Reflect. Do other stuff. Reflect.
Direct experience is the grand-goddess of figuring this all out.
You'll get a plethora of suggestions of what area of your life to focus on and what to do regarding the girl stuff.
My two cents is listen to your inner voice. If you don't know what that is, just keep at the self-improvement / self-actualization stuff.
For me, getting my finances and financial confidence sorted via business early in my twenties has been tremendously awesome, although I've neglected intimacy which has come back to bite me recently, so now I'm addressing that.
Any time you feel 'off', bad, or sick, is nature's way of telling you that you need to 'correct' something. Identifying what that something is, is 95% of the work done.
So get busy meditating, journaling, posting stuff on forums, reading, having sex, travelling etc!
Follow that inner voice!

@IAmPaulQuinn
A list of things to consider: 
Career The world works via society's "give and take" rule. You will have to work in all cases. So what are you good at doing? Rather get paid for it than work in a dead end job.
Values What things do you value? In other words, what makes you happy? Society is designed to draw you away from what really makes you happy, hence the popularity of consumerism, social media, divisive politics, charade elections. So therefore what you wanna do is find your happiness, otherwise you will be automatically fooled.
Preferences Who are you? What is your heart's desire? What things can't you live without? What things would you likely regret not getting when you are old in a senior citizen's home.
Resilience How do you handle suffering and trauma? Do you easily give up from obstacles? 
Goals What do you wanna accomplish? What is your ambition that you wanna achieve? Why do you wanna achieve it? 
Impermanence A thing to remember: Nothing lasts. The 60's in retrospect is a far different time period from the one we are living now.
Death Everyone will die someday... So what do you wanna do while you're here? 
I'm seventeen too... These are the things that strike me as important. Hope it helps.

1
•You realize that ignorance is mostly cultural
...and that people have always lived in egoic bubbles constrained by time and place
 
2
•You put events into context
 
3
•You realize how privileged you are
Peacetime, healthcare, laws, education, medicine, technology
 
4
•You learn funny stories
Marat was a French revolutionary who had to spend his days in a bathtub because of a skin condition, in this bathtub he wrote polemics against the monarchy which influenced the revolution. 
 
5
•You realize development is very geographical
China is surrounded by the Gobi Desert, Himalayas and the Pacific Ocean and so was  isolated from other nations for hundreds of years, which helped its development.
 
6
•You become less racist/nationalist (because you realize everyone contributed to our modern world)
Did you know civilization was started by modern day Iranians, Indians, Egyptians and Chinese? 3000 years before Europeans came on the scene? Have you heard of The Golden Age Of Islam? Do you know who Zheng He is? Mansa Musa? Did you know Chinese invented gunpowder?
 
7
•You learn from past mistakes
 
8
•You understand how long it takes to build a country that lasts
It took Europe 1500 years of conflict to become united. (Although Europe is not a country, you get the point)
9
•You become better at envisioning the future
...because you realize we will never peak, so many things have not been invented yet
 
10
•You realize everything is impermanent
Empires rise and empires fall, glory fades.
 
11
•You become better at geography
...and perhaps you fall in love with the planet and its diversity of cultures and people
 
12
•You see the unity and division over time
http://geacron.com/home-en/
 
13
•It makes you want to explore the world
 
14
•You get shocked and inspired by the bravery of historical people
Columbus exploring the ocean, Livingstone trekking through the African jungle, Gandhi almost starving to death for his countries freedom
 
15
•You realize there is no simple solution to building societies and countries, you become a more nuanced thinker
 
16
•You realize countries are just a concept and dont really exist
 
17
•You realize morality is relative to historical era
 
18
Our education system is way too limited in its scope of history
...why arent we learning about Asia? Middle-East? Mayans? Incas? Sumerians? Ancient Persia? Islam?
19
•You become a pacifist!
5000 years of bloodshed, cant we just talk it out this time?
 

wait what? when was this released ?? wow
edit: it's a nice intro. 
would be excited to see this more thoroughly built out 
ooo a study i found in the footnotes : https://www.academia.edu/6336134/A_Phenomenological_Study_of_Individuals_at_Spiral_Dynamics_Integral_SDi_Theory_Second_Tier_Levels_of_Development

That's a valuable lesson.

Yesterday evening I tried shamanic breathing. Thank you Leo for the video and Muhammad Jawad for drawing my attention! Very powerful technique! In just 30 minutes the results are overwhelming.
After appr. 10 min. my body has become convulsive and my mind dizzy. I even thought to stop it and try again,  when my doughter is not at home. But then I have become clear in the head and the convulsiveness has gone. The breathing was so easy, like it was the most natural breathing in the world, my mouth wasn´t even dry. I felt a little tension in the lower part of my chest. But it was not a unpleasant, like I´ve got to get rid of it as soon as possible. It was like the tension has always been there and now I am just aware of it and it´s ok. I had to restrain myself from jumping up and dancing  Maybe it´s because of shamanic music with drums?
The last 5 minutes of 30 min. were exactly like the first 5 min. - pretty boring and uncomfortable with a dry mouth.
After the exercise was over I was sitting there with my eyes closed and looking at the changing beautiful patterns of the most vivid colors on the black screen of my closed eyes. The exposions of colors. At the end the small but intensive violet sun was shining behind the black mountains. 
And I am still high and light in the head and in the chest, like I am in love or like I am young and want to go to disco and dance the whole night. In the chest where I felt tension during breathing I feel a pleasant prickling now. 
But it was very very cold.  The air was becaming icy with every breath. I had a vision, that I am a shaman at the North Pole dancing in ice and snow. Next time I´ll take 2 or even 3 duvets. 
Maybe I will improvise next time - to breath through chest or through belly?

That is true. I know a few that work on different aspects of femininity: sexuality, motherhood, healing childhood trauma, rebalancing yin and yan... Depends on what your request is. I'd gladly provide a suggestion but not sure it's allowed. 

Truth at it's best here.
Particularly this: "Paradoxically, a form of ignorance similar to nihilism , is often found in contemporary Advaita teachings (neo-advaita).It is only normal for an ignorant who believes to be realized to tell his students that they are already realized, for he knows no better. This instant form of enlightenment is trendy in our culture of instant gratification.The teacher has ended his/her quest too early, based on a purely intellectual understanding that “form is emptiness and emptiness is form”(i.e., no self). Since he had no revelation of Transcendence (key word here), his teachings lack the poetry, the love, the supreme intelligence and the sense of awe that we find in Rumi, Buddha, Jesus, Ramana Maharshi, Jean Klein, Krishna Menon and other truly enlightened beings."

Anyway.here's the full article:
Truth is beyond the mind just as the mirror is beyond the reflected images that appear in it. The reality of the images is the mirror, but the reality of the mirror is not an image. The mirror exists independently from any of the reflected images. In other words, this Presence is both immanent in the perceptions and transcendent in their absence. The belief that it is only immanent is ignorance, the experience that it transcends the mind is enlightenment, and the actual continuous experience of both its transcendence and its immanence is self-realization.
The denial of the transcendence of Atman was a major heresy of Buddhism. Also known as nihilism or as the Anatman doctrine, it was a subject of controversy between buddhists and advaitins in Shankara’s days. However this denial is not found in the original teachings of the Buddha or in those of the Chan and Zen masters. Atman is what they refer to as “our Buddha nature”, “our true nature”, “our original face”. This heresy is still fairly common in contemporary Buddhism. It originates from a misunderstanding of the saying “Form is emptiness and emptiness is form”. To understand this saying correctly, let us take the metaphor of a white page with a red apple painted on it. The red apple is the form, the remaining white portion of the page is the emptiness. But we can look at it differently, the white portion of the page being the form, the red portion being the emptiness (= absence of white). It follows that “Form is emptiness and emptiness is form”. The transcendence, the Atman, The Brahman, “our Buddha nature”, “our true nature”, “our original face”, is the piece of paper, the support of the red and of its absence.

The saying “Form is emptiness and emptiness is form” is used as a warning about a state of mind reached by practitioners during meditation in which an absence of thoughts, an emptiness is experienced. The disciple is simply reminded that this absence of form is still a form, and that enlightenment has not been experienced at that stage, because the transcendence, our Buddha nature has not been revealed yet.
Paradoxically, a form of ignorance similar to nihilism is often found in contemporary Advaita teachings. These paths in both cases lead to a “second class” type of enlightenment which is no enlightenment at all. The teacher has ended his/her quest too early, based on a purely intellectual understanding that “form is emptiness and emptiness is form”. Since he had no revelation of Transcendence, his teachings lack the poetry, the love, the supreme intelligence and the sense of awe that we find in Rumi, Buddha, Jesus, Ramana Maharshi, Jean Klein, Krishna Menon and other truly enlightened beings. Because he is not awakened to his own Presence, his presence doesn’t awake the Presence in the student. The final truth there, seems to be “there is nothing to do, your current condition is already that of a realized being”. It is only normal for an ignorant who believes to be realized to tell his students that they are already realized, for he knows no better. This instant form of enlightenment is trendy in our culture of instant gratification. However it doesn’t correspond to the sudden enlightenment the Chan masters spoke of.

To them “sudden” didn’t mean “right away”.The only problem with this “enlightenment on sale” is that it falls short from bringing about the peace and the happiness we seek. In some cases it may create in the student a form of resignation, the belief that there is nothing to find. Most disciples will remain stuck with their pseudo enlightenment; others, disenchanted with the whole “truth business”, will revert for a while to their previous life style; the most eager ones will continue the search and find a true teacher whose silence, words, demeanor and actions will take them to the apperception of their true nature and who will guide them on the path until they are established in unshakable peace.
This leads me to a final remark. That which matters is not what is said about the Truth, but where that which is said comes from. If it comes from ignorance, no matter how advaitically correct it seems to be, it will never have the incendiary power of a single line of a Rumi poem. And that which is said is marginal compared to the silent transmission that takes place in the guru’s presence, the highest form of teaching according to Buddha (remember the episode of the flower and of the Buddha’s smile), Ramana Maharshi, Atmananda, Jean Klein, etc… And yet this silent teaching is carefully ignored by many contemporary teachers, both buddhists and advaitins, because they cannot speak of an experience which is not theirs, even so they claim to teach the same non dual realization as these illustrious teachers. Ultimately, the truth has to be heard “from the lips of the guru” according to Atmananda’s formula, for it’s apperception to occur. Mere conversations over the internet won’t get the job done. They can at best convey a “sample” of the causeless joy of our true nature, which will resonate in the heart of those who have “eyes to see and ears to hear” the Truth that cannot be uttered.
Love,
Francis

 

@onacloudynight <3  Give it a shot.  You'd get a clear idea on if you can pass, if it feels right, how your feminine side acts.
I agree with that - we are living differently than most people.
Oooh, you could try a bra that is shaped and a corset to make your hips look wider.  If I were in your shoes, I would totally embrace this and see if it makes you feel happy.
@Preety_India It's a term one of the teachers I follow coined.  You basically keep a mental log of different paranormal energies, as well as personal and environmental.  Over time this creates a database that a person can refer back to in order to understand spiritual phenomena a little easier.  A mind map, basically.
Every key that I have is either a part or a whole chain of events that lead to a personal insight, awakening or paranormal event.  I have ones in my environment as well.
You can learn about how to find/make them in Mary Mueller Shutan's book Shamanic workbook vol. 1

Beautifully written <3

@PepperBlossoms
An excerpt from Journeys Beyond Earth:
"You are not human – mortem is an appearing thought. You are not on Earth – space is an appearing thought. By dissolving psychological boundaries, you realize you are free to go in all directions. The third dimension is a construct – a mental construct keeping you locked from reaching the Center of the Earth. The notion of space is a belief. You are free to venture anywhere. You are not constrained to a country. You are not constrained to a place. These are useful survival notions. They assault you constantly – constantly – unless you wake up. This is not just Earth. This is the center of all reality. As it happens, all things become infinitely close and infinitely far away. The key to Shangri-La."
Beauty is realizing you are what you have sought. There is no one more developed than you on this forum, more pure, more enlightened than you. This place you call Earth, this is a mystical experience. The very kernel of this presence is spirituality. You are having a spiritual experience right now. And that's a beauty.

@PepperBlossoms
no one knows lol but this might serve: 
If then you do not make yourself equal to God, you cannot apprehend God; for like is known by like.
Leap clear of all that is corporeal, and make yourself grown to a like expanse with that greatness which is beyond all measure; rise above all time and become eternal; then you will apprehend God. Think that for you too nothing is impossible; deem that you too are immortal, and that you are able to grasp all things in your thought, to know every craft and science; find your home in the haunts of every living creature; make yourself higher than all heights and lower than all depths; bring together in yourself all opposites of quality, heat and cold, dryness and fluidity; think that you are everywhere at once, on land, at sea, in heaven; think that you are not yet begotten, that you are in the womb, that you are young, that you are old, that you have died, that you are in the world beyond the grave; grasp in your thought all of this at once, all times and places, all substances and qualities and magnitudes together; then you can apprehend God.

But if you shut up your soul in your body, and abase yourself, and say “I know nothing, I can do nothing; I am afraid of earth and sea, I cannot mount to heaven; I know not what I was, nor what I shall be,” then what have you to do with God? ~ Hermes Trismegistus

Eventually, as @Hello from Russia said, you will develop your own system that works for you. Until then, you're going to want to do a lot of annotating (underlining, circling catchy phrases, etc.). If you're reading a book that you think is really important, I recommend you take it slow. Ask yourself after each paragraph or chapter: What was the essence of this? Jot that down in the margin if it helps. 

Reading is just one side of the coin of comprehension. Writing is the flip side. Spend a chunk of time writing about what you've read. At the end of books that I found tons of value in, I typically write down the 3-5 core ideas of the book. Sometimes I will just open up a MS Word document and go to town. The point is that you will get the most out of your books by relentlessly contemplating the ideas, whether it's in the shower, on your drive to the grocery store, or before bed. Happy reading!

In some ways, I can't put them into two different categories. I think my psychedelic experiences have influence my breathwork sessions. Last week after my second session, the facilitator said I was going places and asking questioning as if I had been doing breathwork for years. Most likely due to my psychedelic experience.
Ime, I would say that psychedelics are more mind expanding and zoom out. I've gotten a lot of personal insights from psychedelics. And they can go into transpersonal / transhuman realms. Here, anything I write is a contextualization at a human level. Psychedelics are more expansive than anything I can write here. Psychedelics have led to an understanding of nonduality, infinity, god-consciousness, love, systemic thinking, holism, and empathic abilities. Yet at a human level, I return to a mind and body with clogged pipes. Psychedelics aren't the best personal plumber imo.
Breathwork seems much more down to earth. It feels like "I" am present. Yet not the thinking-dominant me. The feeling, experience-of-now me. Breathwork is also far less intense. There is no body load and there are no anxiety issues. And it can be done every day for continuous healing, insights and restructuring of the mind. It can also be a great release of repressed emotions. During one session last week, I started screaming as loud as a possibly could. The body with rhymically breathing on it's own and I was taking in huge deep breaths so to scream louder on the out breath. My hands were tightly clenched and arms pumping with each breath. During the comedown, there was a wave of tears and relief. It felt like so much had been released. If this happened on psychedelics, it probably would have been a traumatic experience that kept me up all night. Yet with breathwork, it was an enormous release and relief. I had a peaceful night of sleep that night. 

At your age, it's easy to think in extremes. My advice to my kids at that age is to go a more moderate path.
That said, if you're serious about it, you wouldn't be the first:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Walden
Thoreau spent 2 years living in the woods, by the labor of his own hands.

4 billion years of fear were required to engineer your body and mind so that it can survive long enough to learn the word "love".

@Knowledge It’s better to start a business, get passive income, then rent a small apartment and stay there the whole time. Plus, prison is not very quiet. 
 
Btw it’s impossible to meditate 24/7. Usually you’ll meditate for about 1-2 hrs. The rest of the time you just have to waste it.  

Yes, whenever I tried one night stands or fwb - the men treated me poorly.
Rarely ever had one night stands, but the few I did was enough to tell me that male psychology works differently.
I won't sleep with someone unless I like them, and even then, this is no guarantee of respect.
Men are dogs, remember this.

Self-Love

Self Love Grid, Teal Swan
You’ll be always worthy of love.
Whether you succeed or seemingly fail.
Not only from your own Love but as well from the Love of others.
You cannot be unloveable.
Whatever you do, it doesn't define you.
Isn't this realization carrying tremendous healing power?
 

Hey there 
As I'm building my coaching business, I've set the goal for myself to record and upload 1 video every single day on Youtube. I know this goal will teach me so much about work ethic, public speaking, etc. That being said, I'd like to be working smarter, not harder. I know over time I will refine my craft and momentum will build as I get really good, but I'd still like to support the growth in whatever ways I can.
My question is: What are the best resources: (courses, teachers) for being successful on Youtube? What are the best mindsets, practices, and tips?
In case anyone is curious, here's my channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAb7y14c1QrzJ0akXOSl8uA/featured Totally open to any feedback as well.
In gratitude, my friends. As always, I deeply appreciate the wisdom you all provide. ? 
Have a wonderful day!

REORIENTATION: And now this journal needs a palette cleanser. ...
If you are reading this, I wish for you a reorientation in the spirit of the highest love, illumination, and clarity. May all things be seen, known, and felt in the spirit of directness (ideally in minimal conflict, but may you be facing conflict directly and fearlessly). May you know the motives of others and of yourself with absolute clarity, and be increasingly aware of direct cause and effect. May you know and realize your dreams and goals as well, etc (or alternatively, may you experience profound, positive meaning in a spontaneous way). Have the best possible relationship with your negative emotions as well as your positive ones.
I wish for you the best of all possible worlds, truly.


 



I was at UNIqlo a couple days ago and they had these Aggretsuko shirts; I was pretty excited but I didn't buy one as I try to limit impulse purchases. It would be the first time I've bought a woman's tee in a long time. Usually, I always get men's shirts because inexplicably they fit better and are usually better made as well.