Bando

i don't know you but a large majority of virgins biggest issue is there not properly socialized, go to events or clubs that interest you and engage in small talk with at least 5 people there before you leave it doesn't have to be girls at all keep doing this and keep adding up the number of people you have to talk to before you leave You have to train yourself to be social thats how this works. If you do this enough times you will find 2-3 friends you can meet up with at these places, organize group events and from there you guys can go approach other groups and keep improving. The naive thing to do would be to think you can approach a random stranger at your level and try to chat her up take baby steps and feel comfortable and healthy in your life before you start pursing women.

Stop thinking relationships and dating as "systems" they will never work out "red pill" philosophy has some valuable perspectives but most of it is borderline misogynist and if you subscribe to that ideology you'll never form fulfilling relationships. Nobody can give you a system because your your own unique individual pull from many sources and splice it with your own knowledge and experiences and go from there.

Your attention as a man is your most valuable commodity only give approval and attention to reinforce good behavior don't ever give your attention to something if the girl is doing something you don't like, this includes getting into arguments, talking about emotional issues or other petty shit, make your attention valuable and she'll either be more attracted to you or go seek it from somewhere else. Its ok to get deeper once sex has happened but until then you should be wise on how you use your attention.

@Consept Yea Alex is a dope as business yt really refreshing and genuine advice

The real question you should be asking yourself is what marketing funnel did you go through to end up giving a guy 2.5k, just to go approach women, which you can do by yourself for free, thats were the real nuggets are

Now the real question is can you notice your self bias and devilry throughout your day thats the real challenge

Don't want to get philosophical but everything is favoritism, as long as your alive you will always have a bias favoring yourself. If you were about to get evicted or had a family to support and you got offered this job you would take it in a heart beat. Now what im assuming is this this job didn't have the career growth you want, salary wasn't good enough or maybe your just not passionate about it so its easy to pass up but this won't always be the case. Especially if your co-workers put in a good word for you it can strain your relationship if you don't accept because "its not fair" The world runs on favoritism nobody including you is immune to it thats all im trying to say, I can see this paradigm of thinking biting you in the butt in the future if you don't examine it more closely .

Nailed it, it didn't feel like theory to me it felt like a genuine experience you can't put into words, looking back its probably the most emotionally draining and frustrating experience I went through but I would do it all over again if give a second chance. You develop very fluid social skills and little doubts about finding quality partners and develop a deep trust in yourself but it does come at a price. You can develop your dating and social skills without going to deep into pickup but to have a "holistic" understanding of attraction, (both good and bad) you typically have to very biased and unconscious. There are some things Ive learned about dating and social interactions only by pushing the limits as far as I could and reached insights that wouldn't be grokked using the more "safer route" The only down side to this is that you pick up a lot of unhealthy beliefs about women and it can trap you from forming deeper connections with them. Ive done a lot of inner healing to overcome those beliefs but occasionally I also find myself slipping back into my old ways of thinking

Get full panel blood work done and focus your money on dentistry if you had to choose

@Javfly33 Great job man, this is what more people need to do instead of complaining about not getting laid. Leo had a great bathtub analogy about getting better at something. Imagine your trying to fill a bathtub with water, You going out and talking to many sets would be the equivalent of dumping a mug full of water into the tub, you sitting and reading theory without the intent of practicing it is like adding an eye drop of water into the tub. Set your attention on meeting many women and practicing your calibration, social skills ect, to fill up the tub as quick as possible. When starting out your only metric should be to talk to x amount of chicks and add a number close statement, but don't make that your intention your only goal should be to vibe and bring good energy and calibrated. About the "delusion" aspect reframe it to entitlement, your mentality should be "who else has the balls to cold approach random women, she should feel lucky she has the chance to meet me" it's not something you logically think about its more of a feeling. It helps when your focused on making your life better via self-improvement that naturally gives you that entitlement mentality. You may piss some girls off with this attitude but thats fine leave with grace and go to the next set.

I can tell you watch a lot of redpill youtube vids

Dude if your in highschool or college get out of your house and go socialize, focus on making friends first and let things happen naturally from there. Your age range is when everyone around you is horny and everyone is close proximity, don't even think about cold approaching. They key is to make SOCIAL friends, not friends who are interested in playing video games and smoking weed all day, that way they can invite you to parties and events and you can connect with people there, don't worry about getting laid just worry about talking to more woman and not being a stuttering fool around them. Also type your exact question on youtube and dive into the info you find

That delusion is what makes people successful but its also a double edge sword.

This is such a beautiful painting do you know any more artists that have this similar style?

This just seems like things didn't work out its not like you could have used any "tactics" to win him over if he wasn't interested. You improved your dating skills and your social calibration, now its time to move on. Its ok to get rejected its going to happen when you date around lol

I didn't read the posts just thought id add my two cents about consent, building comfort, respecting boundaries and not trying to force a situation with "Anti-slut defence tactics" really helped me build better relationships with the women I date. When I first started my pua phase one of my sticking points was the last minute resistance i would get when i'd get a chick back to my place. I would try the two steps forward one step backwards, kino, wait 20 minutes if things didn't escalate id do it again until she said said a hard no or I got sex. I didn't even realize this was manipulative or shady until I started to notice my quality of relationships were really shitty and my retention rate was horrendous. I started asking girls for brutal honesty on why they ghosted me or ignored me and the common theme I got was being to "pushy" or "aggressive" or "fuck boy like" and I started to see the flaws of this whole "anti-slut defense LMR" worldview pua's push so much. It didnt hit home until one of the girls I was with explained to me that the actions I did reminded her of her ex who was also pushy and would "pressure" her into sex or sexual acts she didnt like but didnt have the boundaries to deny him. She told me I reenacted those memories when she was first with me and that's what caused her to distance herself from me. I contemplated on what she said and reflected back on my experiences and started to notice a pattern on why I was having such a bad relationship streak and it clicked. Now when I invite a girl back to my place ill talk with her a while and then make my move and if I sense any hesitation or she says not today i wont try again for the rest of our interaction and would carry on with our experience together. Ive definitely lost some girls by using this approach but the relationships I have now are much deeper than before and honestly the sex is better because the girl can relax knowing her boundaries are being respected.

Nothing Graphic here just some video I Stumbled upon which showed me how blessed I am to live in a first world country. These gangsters blocked off a traffic light which is typical in places like Mexico as these gangs fall under a particular cartel and attempted to steal this mans truck. Had this man stopped and rolled down the window like most of us would he would have gotten robbed or worse. People poo poo on police but fail to realize that without some form of power to regulate the rules that keep society a decent place to live people will act out their primitive nature

Dam thats crazy a chick shows her journey losing weight from her diet and you people start bashing and criticizing her for her decision instead of being supportive weird... I dont think that human are "frugavores" or whatever but I feel you making a conscious decision to only eat veggies and fruits led to you being more aware of what you put in your mouth which has led to your weight loss. Awareness to what you consume is the most important part of transforming your body and only limiting yourself to fruits and veggies is a good way to manage your diet. You look much better at your weight now than before in my opinion great job

One thing that helps is to stop being judgemental, its ok to talk about nothing with other people and just shoot the shit not every conversation has to provide some profound insight.

@Monkey_in_suit There are specialists that are specifically trained to do this procedure because most dentists have a very material understanding on how oral healthcare works you would need t find a more holistic dentist

Easier said then done Incels have way bigger issues than just being social their starting at such a low point of shame, insecurity, limiting beliefs its like like telling a man thats been homeless for 5 years, "Go make money bro!" "Were not in a recession any more"

@Noahsteelers34 Glad you reconsidered it, one thing you got going for you is that you have balls, your only a freshman so i suggest you don't take your career as serious this year, take this time to come out of your shell date new girls, join clubs, party and have fun. Also take the time to network with other people who have the job your looking to get. If your dorming you shouldn't be in your room unless your sleeping, doing hw or having sex. Go out talk to people and network. One tip I'll give you for professional networking is use your teachers to connect you to a few professionals and send cold email to them leveraging your school email account. Your much more likely to get a response and you can use this to get a deeper understanding of whatever field you plan on going into. There are so many things you can do to extract the value colleges are charging. When I graduated from college I was at around 6k in debt and had multiple high paying job offers to choose from. This took tremendous amount of effort and refusing to be passive about my college experience. College is not a scam if your creative and take your growth serious. Dm me if you have any other questions about college I personally loved the experience and believed I got my moneys worth.

@Shiva99 why are you trying to fight it so much thats your body showing you its working, I used to have limiting beliefs with masturbation because of all these eople saying its "bad" or "fogs your mind" but it doesn't at all. Just kick back enjoy it and stop judging yourself and move on. Theres going to be a time where even getting one erection is going to seem like a win so enjoy it and relax

@Noahsteelers34 Bro everything im about to write in this post is coming from a place of love and is meant to shock you so you can understand the gravity of your situation. Take the time to read this out and understand college isn't as black and white as you believe. Hopefully this makes you ask the hard questions and gives you some guidance. This is not a well thought out plan when you give up an "opportunity" like college it has to be for something equal. The fact you dont already have some projects or endeavors your considering shows you immaturity and lack of planning. You don't understand how unbelievably difficult this is. Most people who make even 75k a year cant hope to save more than 20k and those people have decent skills to offer. As a 18-19 year old you would be lucky to find a job that pays $20 an hour and even if you do it will be a dead end job with practical transferable skills or career prospects. You will actually be taking a step backwards as the notion of waking up and slaving 8 hours plus a day on some minimum wage job will break you School is not this expensive if you use your brain. People who pay this amount of money a year are lazy and just do things without thinking. First of community college is an option and only costs around 6k per semester and that's not including government grants and scholarships. You could do 2 years there and then finish up at a college that interests you many people do that. This could save you 10's of thousands of dollars Second you could take online classes your first year or two and then take in person classes which could also save 10's of thousands of dollars. Third you don't have to dorm this immediately cuts your bill in half and you can work at your school and make friends that way and leverage that into something good. Stop saying "im paying 35k a year" actually take time to consider how you could lower this price, your an idiot if you pay the full sticker amount for your tution your just being lazy and hoping everything magically gets figured out. Again stop being Lazy, if this is really what you want take some online classes your first year as you'll mostly be learning general education and use the rest of your time to build real world skills. Stop thinking college is a scam its not, if you dont use your brain an only go there to do homework then go home your a fool. College is not some linear path, your supposed to find yourself there, just because you go there with the intent of studying Computer science or something doesnt mean those are all the classes you have to take. You could take art, music theater ect. Most of your learning is going to be done outside the classroom never forget that. You have such a rigid view on what college is because you keep listening to this woke crap. Go in a room by yourself and really think this through, ask yourself "Do i want to take online classes? Do i want to dorm? Do I want to go to community colloge?" and go back to your dad and enroll. If money is really an issue you should be working hard to come up with solutions to bring the cost down. Listen man your 18-19 years old your going to have many brash and dumb decisions, but take these years serious. No matter what anyone tells you 18-26 are the most important years of your life. Most of you character and beliefs for the average person is developed in this part of your life. Dont waste it on some dead end job when you have parents that are willing to help you. Only drop out of college when you have a well thought out plan, the math is done correctly and your opportunity mathes the cost it would have to leave college.

There you go, you got the lesson you needed from this exchange, don't develop a victim mentality and make sure the next girl your interested in knows it.