Gesundheit

Feeling grateful now. Direct experience is partial. It's less than 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of truth (got tired of typing zeros lol). Only truth exists, but you don't necessarily have to experience it for it to exist. A tree falling in the forest without anyone there to witness that, makes a sound. Reality is non-dual, direct experience + thoughts. And only one set of thoughts is necessarily true. It cannot be otherwise.

Good.

Unfortunately, she got bigger balls than you.

Let me tell you what the deep problem of politics is. It's nothing. There isn't actually a problem, but people make it to be. Imagine a car with 5 people fighting for the steering wheel, that's basically what politics is all about. Control. The rest is noise and delusion. No ideology is better than any other. Not even "the truth" ideology is better than any other. Any ideology would work fine if we'd leave one driver have the steering wheel. Just one driver. That's it. The rest please buckle up your seat belts and enjoy the ride. All the grind we're creating to customize these few years in this realm isn't worth it. No, sir.

?? #1: ignorance. #2: suffering. #3: crumbling down and dying, or integrating and growing, or staying at #2, or regressing to #1.

Anything and everything that humans ever do, without exception, is one or more of three: To take something from you. To infect you with their delusions. A defence mechanism or a some complexity playing out. Basically, these are all human motivations in a nutshell. Human society is sick. Even when people are supposedly trying to help you, they're actually causing more harm than good to you, something difficult for me to articulate, but now I get it! Islam says that you should live life like a traveller passing some road, no more. That's it, less is more.

Awareness is ego-antagonistic, stripping away all meaning gradually, layer after layer, until there's nothing left.

Nothing makes sense anymore. It's strange, being here.

I got exhausted so I quit.

Not true. Absolute cannot be love or beauty. It makes no sense to even say that it can. Contemplate this question; how is absolute beauty different from absolute ugliness?

You could think of it this way but it's still not full non-duality. The false judgement is merely one layer of deception, which may be obvious to a lot of people on the path. The other layer which is difficult to understand, is that the whole concept of beauty is illusory, like literally unreal. In your direct experience, examine what beauty means and see for yourself. What does it actually really mean to say that something is beautiful (or ugly)? What does it add to, or remove from reality? Who's the one citing and passing these judgements?

Psychedelics are a child's play, simply put, but so is all reality.

I'm not a Buddhist, but yes, beauty is actually delusion related to survival, and survival is related to the ego, so yeah it makes sense.

Nope. Being is just itself and love is merely a conceptual overlay appearing inside of being.

There's no such thing as God in the first place to care about us or something else.

Whatever you hear other people say or talk about, the first assumption you should always make is that they're aiming to steal your money off of it. If you fail to prove that it's about stealing your money, then it's either about controlling you which equals stealing your power, or it's a defence mechanism or some complexity playing out. In my case, it's a complexity, but don't trust me on that. Ask yourself, how is my behaviour supposed to change if I believe that reincarnation exists? How will this belief limit me?

@AlwaysJoggin Breathe slower. Eat healthier. Stay hydrated. Go out in the morning. Take it easy.

My pleasure. Now more to the practical side, there can only be two possibilities here: The attraction is there for no reasons. The attraction is there for no apparent reasons. The first possibility is not very likely. The second is probably the case. There's something unconscious going on on your part that is creating the attraction, but since you're not aware of it yet it's not apparent to you. I suggest that instead of trying to escape this, to dive in it consciously, and examine it like a scientist studying bacteria. Bring out your microscope and dissect your feelings, and keep at it until you get the clarity you want. And in the meantime, try learning about attachment styles and shadow work and parts work. There's always so much to uncover through these methods. In brief, my advice is to stop resisting what's going on, and instead lean into it with curiosity to understand what's under the surface. Chances are the cause of the attraction is buried underneath the resistance. Dig deep within yourself and find out. Good luck.

@John Iverson Anything done consciously is good, doesn't matter what it is.

If you're suffering from delusions, yes. If not, it'll bring you suffering and then act like it'll free you, just so that you can go meta and while not moving an inch.

SD is not for everyone. You'd have to have at least a few Green and Yellow components to be able to make sense of it, let alone make use of it. How you present it plays little to no part in comparison.

And that's the dirty, dirty love.

Unreality.

I'd leave everything behind and focus on this one thing until I'm done.