Gesundheit

Isn't love just a thought?

Yesterday I took a hike in the city at night. All that was on my mind was my soulmate. I fucking miss her so fucking much. And even though I let go long ago I eventually came to realize that it's all meaningless. Meaninglessness so meaningless that it doesn't have any meaning to it whatsoever. I have realized recently that all human emotions are delusion. A healthy human should not be experiencing the least of them. Emotions are nothing but attachment manifesting in the body as different sensations in different locations depending on the content of thoughts. Peace of mind is not a sensation. It is the neutralization of all sensations into nothing. Pure being. Love is delusion. Passion is delusion. Lust is delusion. Depression is delusion. Anger is delusion. Hatred is delusion. All emotions, positive and negative, are delusion. The whole emotional spectrum is delusion. God/awareness/the observer/the witness has no emotions. It's empty. Emotions are ego. And God can have an ego when he forgets himself. I'm so neutral right now, yet there is a desire to write. There is an emotion making me write what I'm writing. I'm leaving this message out here for myself as to remind myself in the future because I know I will forget. The more I try to repress this emotion the more intense it gets. So I understand that God can't help being deluded. God is delusion.

@Raptorsin7 I have. That deep emotional connection was with my soulmate. We stayed together for 4 months which were the second best part of my life so far (second to the enlightenment part), but then something occurred. Now she's psychotic hallucinating stuff and seeing delusions. When we were together, everything was perfect. Now I'm back to my original mode. However, I feel like something is changing but I can't quite figure it out. It maybe a change for a deeper rock bottom idk. So anyway I think what you're thinking of goes into my second theory category. We lack certain external components that cannot be generated internally otherwise, in my case it was a soulmate (other gf archetypes would not work). See, since the ego/self-image is imaginary, it has to be created out of nothing. I am not yet able to do that on my own. It has to be created by someone else. When I was a kid, I never had goals. So I took my parents goals and internalized them as mine. When I grew up a little bit more, I still didn't have goals. So I took my friends goals and internalized them as mine. Right now, I still don't have goals but I don't have the kind of friends who have vision/goals. And so I am technically lost. In fact, I don't like being around people who have vision/goals. I deep down think that they're deluded, two weeks ago I stopped talking to one of my friends immediately right after I found out she was passionate about something. I stopped feeling comfortable around her anymore. She asked me what happened. I told her that I don't want to talk and that was it. I think the whole thing is tricky because it has to do with identity/self-image/values.

@Raptorsin7 hey buddy I'm in your shoes in the exact same situation only I don't judge and criticize myself as much. I don't think I'm a loser neither do I suffer from my situation. It's just who I am so why complain? Anyway I'm not here to suggest solutions cuz I have none. I will simply talk about myself assuming that you are experiencing something similar. So far I have formed many theories for why I am the way I am. But only two stood out above the rest. I am not born to be a leader. Just not my thing. I lack certain external components that cannot be generated internally otherwise, like a certain drug for example. I can elaborate on each one if you want that. But you mentioned going to psychiatrists and stuff, what did they tell you? Did they describe any meds? I was thinking about this but I still am forming other theories so I keep postponing that.

First of all you need to make sure you've questioned the materialist paradigm to death. You must reach a level where have no doubts that it's just a paradigm or an idea that you hold in your mind. This should become crystal clear to you at least intellectually. And then by practicing mindfulness and focusing awareness on the mere fact that you actually exist, that there is something here being experienced, that'll create moments of epiphany, which should stick. You could watch some videos on YouTube for assistance. There's a lot of techniques but I recommend you stick with a few even though it's good to practice some of the others occasionally.

@JosephKnecht @Mu_ Sigh. People don't seem to recognize humorous analogies anymore. Or perhaps they're afraid of something imaginary, of their ideas. Either way, sigh.

@mandyjw

What is the point of anything?

For example when someone says: this is stupid. What he or she actually means is that this seems stupid from their pov. This is something I've struggled with for a long time. I tend to always express myself authentically and tend to use language in an assertive manner. Somehow this used to trigger some people and they criticized me for it even though I have good understanding of what relativity means I just leave it implicit. Looking back now in retrospect I realize that these people were probably neurotic or that they'd learned about relativity recently. So for them it seemed like I was talking in an absolute sense when in fact I was simply expressing myself and my relative point of view. They wanted me to explicitly expres my relative pov. Somehow they imprinted me with the idea that I should never talk in an assertive manner and it's exhaustive uou know. I had to go out of my way to fake language I don't even want to use so that they would not critisize me. I want my freedom back. With this insight today I don't have to limit myself any more. I am free to express myself however I see fit. And now that I think about it, if we choose to imply relativity in every sentence it's actually a lot more powerful. If we make relativity the initial assumption for everything we receive from the outside world, think of how powerful that can be. You will never need to worry whether or not something you've heard is true because you know that it's relative to the speaker. I am free.

The best practices for increasing consciousness are the ones that you've never done before. Master one practice at a time up to 70% and then explore some other practice. The final 30% is difficult to achieve anyways so be wise about that.

?? Thanks for putting this here.

The thing is that you're already experiencing non-duality. Only you aren't aware of that. Life is a mystical experience, not any different than a dream. The materialist paradigm is probably the main reason for why most people don't see this obvious fact. Most people see life as a mundane thing when it's actually the strangest thing ever. Train your awareness to see the mystical nature of reality in the present moment. That'll increase your consciousness. At some point you will have an epiphany that: Of course! It has always been mystical!

@actualizing25 Look up Baha'ism

@Forestluv @Leo Gura although now that I think about it I do wonder. Suppose I have a position that I realize is completely relative yet I go on debating others for it. My relationship with the position is not necessarily related to it being objectively absolutely true. A lot of times for me it was pride and ego. I fully recognized the relativity of my position yet I would not admit it's relative. Or maybe I would admit that but would still argue for it as if it was correct. I mostly wanted to be agreed with so that I could control the narrative, even though some other times I thought my position was actually "better" than others' in the sense that I thought I knew better than them which I am still convinced till this day it may be correct. It's something that needs further inspection on my part I should say. But I'd like to hear your thoughts if you'd like to emphasize or comment.

I am dumb, deeply ignorant. Yet act sometimes arrogantly. The ego is a tricky beast. I wonder why I would defend something I know is completely imaginary and not merely that, but also don't want or even like. I should be the one owning my ego not the other way around. But who's the one saying that?! God will forgive me.

@James123 absolutely because it does not make sense to the intellect it rather speaks to the heart

So true. I'm only beginning to realize these nuances.

@Leo Gura sadly true

@Leo Gura Iran is mostly Shia and the gulf is mostly Sunni. That makes them polar opposites and easy for exploitation by secular countries.

@Leo Gura Love it! Always implied

Of course. Democracy emerges from Orange's capitalism or maybe they work hand in hand or both simultaneously? The middle east is still below orange so it makes sense. The problem though is that being poor and/or at war handicaps all development, which raises questions about Israel. Why did the west decide that Israeli people belong in the middle east and not some other place? It seems like another way of exploitation both of Arabs and Jews especially at their level of development where religion is a serious problem. So it creates a ripple effect. Neither Arabs or Jews will be able to move up the spiral as long as they're busy fighting each other.

@Leo Gura I wanna say thank you for everything but it still wouldn't be enough. I owe the biggest part of my growth to you. I'm waiting for Understanding Relativity part2 and I believe a lot of people are the same. Is it close on your list?

@Leo Gura The way I see it is that they're both benefiting from each other. The gulf is afraid of potential Iranian expansion and so they're creating this alliance with the US just in case. The price of being underdeveloped in a world where science is key is to submit to a higher force. So if it's not the US it would be China or Russia.

Wait are you saying that oil is not important? That the west is funding the middle east.? The world has the east as well, China is the biggest industrial country in the world as far as I know.

Stay with the negative emotions. They're healthy as long as you're embracing them and not trying to repress or escape them.