Gesundheit

@molosku I thought it was love. My bad.

@RedLine Dude it's as if you're speaking for me. You'll probably be faced with so much gaslighting and not many will even bother try to understand what you're saying but you're on the right track.

I can't. Lol Those who want me to stop expressing myself should stop doing that.

You're confusing the absolute and relative here. What you said may be true in the relative sense, but not in the absolute sense.

Why does the bully in school bully other students?

@RedLine Correct.

Feminism.

Modern society idolizes women and worships them and put them on a pedestal. Most guys naturally grow thinking that they are not good enough to be able to talk to women. Hence the anxiety and social awkwardness. Most guys when interacting with women, they're focused on the sex part only, and therefore they are anxious and come off awkward. If guys were able to see women as human beings just like they are, there wouldn't be that much of the problem. It's entirely the media's and society's fault. They raise dysfunctional males and then let them suffer the consequences. Unfortunately, males are not alone in this because guess what, women suffer too from the social awkwardness of men. Men become creeps and that's very unappealing to women so they become highly selective and guys start forming complexes. Hence, the whole pick-up industry.

Reckless! Lol

If you gave a kid infinite power and immortality, guess what the kid would do.

May I ask you about your lifestyle?

@28 cm unbuffed thank you. I have all that into place, although I forget from time to time. Yet here I am without motivation, and that's not a bad thing and I'm not pissed off nor suffering. I take all that with acceptance. Yet here I am and nothing is changing. I have a severe traumatic past so that may be the cause. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this trying to understand it. We'll see where things go.

You can't say it's horseshit as long as it has consequences. A thing is only horseshit when it's completely useless, and even horseshit isn't completely useless since it may be used as a fertilizer. Maybe "wrong" is what you mean by "horseshit". But even then that would be misleading and actually wrong since "wrong" implies that whatever consequences suggested must be wrong. So basically you're contradicting yourself.

Sure. I always prefer an empty mind with nothing to focus on. And now we're back on track, because an empty mind does not generate motivation. How can I convince myself to change this preference? I don't fucking know!

@28 cm unbuffed I am talking about the real actual physical death. Not the death of the ego-mind. Ego-death, while interesting, is still something that occurs in the dream. I am talking about the end of the dream once and for all without return.

Let me rephrase your question: If God is all loving and powerful then how could it allow even the least amounts of suffering, pain and misery in the world? Can't it just let everyone be happy and in love and harmony all the time? If it can't, then why insist on it being all loving and powerful? Can't God create a perfect utopian world? In theory it could, yet in practice it didn't. Why? Probably because God is a little kid playing some kind of video game.

You don't understand. First of all, that's a very slow and painful way to die. Secondly, I couldn't do that even if I wanted to because I live with my family so they would force food and water on me. Thirdly, that would be suicide. Fourthly, I am in fact content with my life as it is and I am flowing with it. Maybe you got the wrong impression but I don't hate my life and I don't passionately love it either. I don't feel any emotion in particular towards life. It's neutral to me. Death, on the other hand, is something new and mysterious, and therefore interesting to me.

@28 cm unbuffed for me it's the lack of death. Tbh I am eagerly waiting for my death to come but it's not happening. Not that I'm suicidal, not at all. I rarely have any suicidal thoughts and I've never felt the need to act on them. See, I don't even have enough motivation to go about seeking death. I just want death to occur to me on its own. I am already dead so to speak.

It's misleading to think that the materialistic paradigm is flawed. It is rather limited/partial than flawed I would say.

Isn't love just a thought?

Yesterday I took a hike in the city at night. All that was on my mind was my soulmate. I fucking miss her so fucking much. And even though I let go long ago I eventually came to realize that it's all meaningless. Meaninglessness so meaningless that it doesn't have any meaning to it whatsoever. I have realized recently that all human emotions are delusion. A healthy human should not be experiencing the least of them. Emotions are nothing but attachment manifesting in the body as different sensations in different locations depending on the content of thoughts. Peace of mind is not a sensation. It is the neutralization of all sensations into nothing. Pure being. Love is delusion. Passion is delusion. Lust is delusion. Depression is delusion. Anger is delusion. Hatred is delusion. All emotions, positive and negative, are delusion. The whole emotional spectrum is delusion. God/awareness/the observer/the witness has no emotions. It's empty. Emotions are ego. And God can have an ego when he forgets himself. I'm so neutral right now, yet there is a desire to write. There is an emotion making me write what I'm writing. I'm leaving this message out here for myself as to remind myself in the future because I know I will forget. The more I try to repress this emotion the more intense it gets. So I understand that God can't help being deluded. God is delusion.

@Raptorsin7 I have. That deep emotional connection was with my soulmate. We stayed together for 4 months which were the second best part of my life so far (second to the enlightenment part), but then something occurred. Now she's psychotic hallucinating stuff and seeing delusions. When we were together, everything was perfect. Now I'm back to my original mode. However, I feel like something is changing but I can't quite figure it out. It maybe a change for a deeper rock bottom idk. So anyway I think what you're thinking of goes into my second theory category. We lack certain external components that cannot be generated internally otherwise, in my case it was a soulmate (other gf archetypes would not work). See, since the ego/self-image is imaginary, it has to be created out of nothing. I am not yet able to do that on my own. It has to be created by someone else. When I was a kid, I never had goals. So I took my parents goals and internalized them as mine. When I grew up a little bit more, I still didn't have goals. So I took my friends goals and internalized them as mine. Right now, I still don't have goals but I don't have the kind of friends who have vision/goals. And so I am technically lost. In fact, I don't like being around people who have vision/goals. I deep down think that they're deluded, two weeks ago I stopped talking to one of my friends immediately right after I found out she was passionate about something. I stopped feeling comfortable around her anymore. She asked me what happened. I told her that I don't want to talk and that was it. I think the whole thing is tricky because it has to do with identity/self-image/values.

@Raptorsin7 hey buddy I'm in your shoes in the exact same situation only I don't judge and criticize myself as much. I don't think I'm a loser neither do I suffer from my situation. It's just who I am so why complain? Anyway I'm not here to suggest solutions cuz I have none. I will simply talk about myself assuming that you are experiencing something similar. So far I have formed many theories for why I am the way I am. But only two stood out above the rest. I am not born to be a leader. Just not my thing. I lack certain external components that cannot be generated internally otherwise, like a certain drug for example. I can elaborate on each one if you want that. But you mentioned going to psychiatrists and stuff, what did they tell you? Did they describe any meds? I was thinking about this but I still am forming other theories so I keep postponing that.

First of all you need to make sure you've questioned the materialist paradigm to death. You must reach a level where have no doubts that it's just a paradigm or an idea that you hold in your mind. This should become crystal clear to you at least intellectually. And then by practicing mindfulness and focusing awareness on the mere fact that you actually exist, that there is something here being experienced, that'll create moments of epiphany, which should stick. You could watch some videos on YouTube for assistance. There's a lot of techniques but I recommend you stick with a few even though it's good to practice some of the others occasionally.

@JosephKnecht @Mu_ Sigh. People don't seem to recognize humorous analogies anymore. Or perhaps they're afraid of something imaginary, of their ideas. Either way, sigh.