Epiphany_Inspired

I can tell you some things that help me determine....for the most part I am generally open-minded, but I often really suck too.... there are times when my limiting beliefs trick me into thinking I'm open when I'm not, or, make my beliefs seem like serious values that "justify" excluding alternatives...here's what helps me: with other people...I have to actually fully embody being in another's shoes...I should be able to fully imagine myself AS them... seriously trying to think and feel through their lenses, while trying to ignore all of mine....when it comes to internal thoughts, it's similar...even when you want to dismiss something, you have to force yourself to consider it...it's helpful to really go outside of the box to accomplish this....

@Jone Yes and no to the like-minded. So far, I'm much more of a homesteader than a nomad (I like to grow food, etc)...but I am in Canada one of your adventure spots, and I too like alternative development. I've had friends hike the Camino (it always seems to be life changing or illuminating)...and I honestly think the reason for that is a combination of 3 things: 1. belief in it, because it's worked for others 2. the magic of the geography 3. the mind set for the commitment/ undertaking.....have an amazing adventure, and keep in touch, I'd love to hear what insights you discover....the only suggestion I have is to also consider internal adventures that expand consciousness without going anywhere too....ultimate wishes!

@OnceMore This may be super dysfunctional / delusional, but it's worked for me, and could maybe help you in this scenario. Do you have a powerful imagination? Ok, perfect: Go get a tin of good strong natural peppermints, or ginger-mints (chalky ones, not sugary ones), and make a new label for the tin that says "bravery mints" or "warning, extremely potent courage tablets" (lol)...then as you attach the new label with packing tape, close your eyes for a moment, and bring down bravery from the multi-verse above (perhaps Zeus throws a lightning bolt of *courage-power* into the mints)...then, whenever you have to step into one of those situations/ conversations you will "have the power" (like he-man, lol) Eventually you don't need the mints... to be more extroverted self-trusting/respecting etc.....best wishes!

I could answer in four words "SAVOUR THE PRESENT MOMENT" Have you ever remembered a movie as "amazing" only to watch it later, and find it's just "ok? This is how the past can work on us, like a fantasy...in fact all you are doing is missing out on the beauty of right now...and it's awesome!!!...today, and tomorrow, and so on, are anything you want to make of them....if only you are willing to dream ...instead of re-living the past, maybe use it as a springboard for things you love, and jump even higher into the now! don't get me wrong, I still do it too....so guilty....I still listen to the same music, I'm super nostalgic....I wonder what if I'd never left my rad fiddler boyfriend and Halifax to come back to BC and get run over twice by a delivery truck?....the key thing there was the "what if" ....what if's are only helpful if positive and forward facing...what if I start working on my life purpose project right now? what if I try that other thing that I've always wanted to do? etc...what if's for dreaming of awesome new possibilities, are rad....watch out for them with worst cases, or re-living the past....having gratitude about the great things you have now really helps!....would you consider making some new even more sparkly, more golden, golden-years starting right now? I will, let's both live now!

@OnceMore My opinion is that you must determine the reason behind your explanations, are they to clear up a mis-communication, or are you reacting, and being defensive....trying to justify yourself to others? Example: I had an issue with a couple/ former friends... in that case, their constant need for explanations, constant harsh criticisms based on inaccurate assumptions (stemming from their projections), etc...became a real integrity issue for me. So, I had to give them up as friends. I know who I am, I know my own truth! .....Now, this is not always the case, or necessary....First, do you feel the need to be "defensive" because of their judgement?, or your own?...in other incidents with other people, I have been "defensive" because of self-judgement, and only realized later that I was the one really wanting to "explain" to justify things to myself....explaining is only worthwhile if it can actually help to clear up miscommunication, etc....so, it's really important to be totally self-honest in these situations....Here are some things to think about that might help. Imagine you are about to start "explanations": 1. Do I truly feel they are just misunderstanding me (my choice, etc), that they will get it, if I explain? 2. If I re-word/ explain my choice in a new way, what are the *actual* chances this will clear things up? 3. What is my history with this person, do they ever really "get" my explanations? 4. Why do I want to give an explanation, for me, or for them? 5. How can I respond, simply, and briefly with compassion and positivity, while standing firmly in my integrity?

@Violet I assumed you posted this because you watched Leo's new loneliness video...but assumptions are shitty...so, in case you haven't, the beginning of the video talks about this...as an INFJ personality type myself, I have always had this habit of observing things people do not wish to have seen by others on the surface...so, I can relate...here are some things I've discovered: 1. You mentioned control...you can only control yourself/ your own life...others can wallow is shit, like a chimpy-pig, if they choose... 2. The aggressiveness you spoke of...it's your truth...and you like to be blunt....I get it....sometimes people really need a wake-up call (like someone that's been burning their face with cigarette butts, and never looking in the mirror)...it's my take, that it's ok to hold up that mirror...but only if it's done with love and compassion (others on the forum will disagree and say "lead by example only")....that type of compassion will take discipline, and a full embrace of love, but... we can learn... maybe ask if they want your advice, then maybe word it in the form of a question..."would you consider"?...rather than "you need to fucking _______, for fuck sakes"...lol.... 3. RE: Tolerating chimpish behaviour...it seems to be a stage in actualization for many of us....as you transcend more behaviours yourself, they become more obvious and disturbing in others....Leo's new video says spending more time in solitude is the way, plus other things like that (see video)....personally, I find that on the rare occasions I can find some more likeminded/ conscious souls to hang with, there's less chimpy stuff to advise on, fret about, deal with...it's awesome!

@Siim Land Yeah, what you said about memory attachment is so true!... memory attachment was 1/2 my problem, the other 1/2 was "potentially useful someday"....when I would go through things to discard, in the past, both of these blocks would get in the way, constantly. With the possibly useful things, my mind got too involved: "how much would it cost to replace this_____if I need to", "I am likely to need these 3 spare _______ my current one could rust/ break/ etc... someday", "this is valuable", etc... and when I came across things associated with a memory, I would not part with them for fear of loosing that connection....what you said is right, it's in our consciousness, not the object...plus, we now know memory is cellular too.... my logic was both bullshit, and irrelevant, because the past is for learning from more than just remembering ...lol....

I just finished the audio book: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo....her clients have found life-purpose, peace, joy, direction, mental clarity, overcoming issues and blocks, etc after completing the process of putting their houses in order, with no relapses to a cluttered home (or mind, lol...) yet, ever! I did a post way back about my minimalism vs consumption, and loved the post and video on the forum Via Negativa by @Siim Land . I believe Leo's response was to elevate the mind first.. which may work for some...but my collections of clothes, records, books, etc are pretty extreme....This book says the opposite, home disorder is a hidden tactic to distract the mind (Likely why I visually *need* some clutter)... some of the methods in Via Negativa also contradict this Japanese method (such as packing "maybe keep" items away for a bit). The main lesson from Marie Kondo is to pick up EVERY item in your home, in one streak (as long as it takes with your available time) and ask "does this spark joy"? I can't believe it...I've been struggling to chip away at my collections of crap for years....and this one simple question has allowed me to discard way more things, super easily. I wish I knew this years ago! There is an order to the items to go through, starting with clothing, and ending with sentimental things like photos (check the book)...and only after all of this, you find a special "home" for everything. I love how much respect she has for the objects that we keep, their energy, how to treat them, give them time off, etc it's beautiful... Amazing concept! Hope this helps any other clutter junkies out there too!

@MoneyTime , I think @Shin is right...my idea will likely improve things...but there is likely a deeper root cause that you will have to deal with eventually...that said, there are more neuro-transmitters in your gut than your other head-brain....and it's a good choice to start by fixing your gut...if you don't have access to a zen master...there may be other holistic treatment options to help you find the root causes....if you make the effort....

@Sevi That's awesome! Good for you! It was a weird synchronicity, I picked the book at the library after just learning about Rahu and Ketu....the snakes and ladders like head and tail of the dragon of the universe....apparently in order to feast on the abundance of the universe (dragon head), one must release (dragon butt/ crap) physical and mental things, to allow in the new....it made sense....and I have been working on the mental/ emotional release...while lacking in the physical letting go....the book was perfect...I hadn't heard of Joe Dispenza, but what he says also makes total sense, thanks!

Google has tons of links to ways that meditation can invoke and improve creativity...it's supposed to be great for this, re-wiring your brain into a more creative mind...but I see NO links on *how to supress creativity to calm your mind*.... For example, I can't even focus on an imagined orange, without it animating, zooming into pores...eventually it would start rolling down things... turn into a dodge ball game with elves, or an edible orange airship, etc...this is creative, but likely just as monkey-mind-distracting as not concentrating on an orange at all....Is it possible to be too distractedly creative to ever meditate successfully? If it is possible, how do you block creativity to meditate and concentrate?

@Nahm I really feel I have worked hard, and have let go...but I will consider it again deeply....my issue is that the other parent is not something I can let go of completely in the physical sense, we share a child...but, I can potentially put a bit more physical distance between me and his behaviour....If I move there, I could potentially have a physical space with more freedom, less concern about interaction (planned visits, or bumping into), etc....there is also the possibility this could offer more community , culture, connection, and motivation....or it could just be another distraction...wish I knew....

@TJ Reeves Thanks so much, that's a really good way to think about it. The problems are external, but they are made worse by the internal *anti-harmonics* they produce. Although I am particularly susceptible to the impact, I'm certain, any reasonably conscious person would also be quite impacted by these externals. That said, I can't deny the internal concern, or place it completely on the shoulders of the external.... Those conventions sound awesome! I'm stoked for you! I'm not into living in big cities anymore, but I do love visiting them for amazing events! I'm considering going somewhere that is in many ways smaller, not bigger...with a population of 10,000 it's 7x bigger than the 1,500 population here...but adds a boat ride to the 350,000 city nearby, and it's 2 boat rides to the nearby 2 million people, big city. If I move it would be for the community, the creative culture and because it's a spiritual center (Dali Lama thinks so too)/ it's generally more open-minded and free. That said, small places often have more dysfunction and less opportunity...also when it's a boat ride to get somewhere...I probably wouldn't leave...that said, the caliber and type of events in this creative/ spiritual community totally suit me...so who knows...I just get more, and more, confused daily, trying to decide rationally....how do I determine if my journey requires external work?

I am not a doctor, and can't make a diagnosis....but what I can say is ...that you likely wouldn't have asked this/ be on this forum, if you didn't want to evolve...right? I can also say, that it's my experience that much of society has these types of addictions and behaviours...it does not mean that they are not destructive....just that you may not be some extremely odd example of humanity....I personally do not agree with mental institutions and pharma- drugs for the mind in general. In fact at least 1/2 of these "symptoms" could be the result of gut- disbiosis. Would you be willing to try a few things for 60 days? *Reduce to minimum, sugar and processed foods (no fast food, diet soda etc), eat more raw fruit/ veg (no sugar in coffee, tiny raw honey ok) *Take strong pro-biotics from a health-food store, or eat unsweetened keifer/ sauerkraut/ etc 3 times a day *Take a supplement like Empower Plus (something with strong minerals etc ...one meant for people with mental function issues) *Walking in, and appreciating, Nature

I have never heard of this...but Qi/Chi Gong is very respected for centuries, and if you've ever tried it, you can feel the shifting of energy, it's fucking awesome...I have no idea what this other thing is...cult?....if you really can turn your gut into magical golden energy ,that's rad....but I know people that have been taken in by cults...and that's pretty scary...I'd say try Qi-gong to start, and do some more research...if it works for you let me know...I'd love to send healing across oceans and live for hundreds of years, seriously, if it's true, bring it on! http://www.facts.org.cn/QandA/200711/t69242.htm

Hot bath w/ Epsom salts, Himalayan salt, baking soda, and a few drops of a good essential oil like ylang-ylang or lavender...

@Visitor Yes, those are awesome! Totally, keep it up! I think art can definitely be used for self-healing in this way, wonderful! The concern I have...What I meant by using art-therapy to psycho-analyze...it actually happened to me, and I know many doctors do actually use it that way... so, use caution. When I was a teenager we had some schizophrenic friends (most now dead/ suicides) and my boyfriend saw some similarities with me...all eccentric artists. He wanted me to go to a psychologist to check. Of course, I passed her tests, not bi-polar/ or schizophrenic, but one thing did really concern her. She asked me to do some "art-therapy" and had me draw a self portrait...she didn't care that I warped my face, almost as if it was melting, for fun, but she was really concerned that I had drawn a large black "ominous" top hat on my head. It took me about half an hour to explain that I really did own a hat like that, often wore it, and why I liked it. She assumed it was a symbol of severe depression! This happened to me in art school too, teachers that want to inflict their meaning on to my art....so, I just wanted to warn others to do this independently, or with someone supportive...not as a way for doctors to project their random shit onto you... Your story, and how your mom was not involved has given me some personal insight...my mom would actually try to stop/ getting hurt herself instead...if she was home...although having no involvement would have been worse...it was really hard to bare/ felt guilt, etc... she worked full-time plus had multiple activities. so, in essence, it's similar to what you experienced too...I had not seen that side of it until your post, so thanks...

@Visitor Thanks so much..."only with a loving heart", so true! Thanks! @Annie Yes, it's very much like Kinesiology....for example, it's the same way PSYCH-K uses muscles in your arm to speak with your subconscious... I've been doing some experiments since posting this to try and determine if it's intuition or subconscious...it seems like it can be both...I am usually very intuitive, but I can get disconnected when I'm overwhelmed...it seems that you can use a pendulum to tap into some intuition that may currently be clouded, if you have the right mindset...there is also a connection with your subconscious...like in kinesiology, and fear etc can effect your responses...that said, you can ask if fear is effecting the response...and what the response would be if you were 100% courageous instead....the trick is being intuitive enough without it, to know when the shadows of your lesser consciousness are effecting your responses....it's works like magic with smaller choices...but...I had hoped to get some guidance with a larger choice, and I've found that both paths get the same response...so far...but perhaps, it's only a matter of finding the right questions...or finding another way to decide....thanks!

Yes...but to be honest it's weird if you come from a professional art background...still. my most recent experience with it was wonderful...it was during the second to last workshop I attended...and what helped me the most is really silly, but true....it was the crayons...lol....the way they can't make a perfect line no matter how steady your hand is...the childhood connection....the freedom...it's bizarre the unexpected things that come out...and the interpretations... That said, I personally believe art therapy, like ALL art is a personal experience, up to the creator of it to give meaning. it's ok for others to offer insights, but I don't think it should be used as a tool to psycho-analyze anyone...just be expressive, enjoy!

I have a friend that operated a healing center with this practice. I see great beauty and benefit with this connection to nature, elements, and energy.

Leo's new insight about savouring the present moment was awesome. I'm sure he won't need as much time management when his time is truly enjoyed. This matched what I had just re-learned in a positive psychology workshop, and what I've known since reading the Power of Now (why it's always the first book I recommend). Also, I've noticed the more I am able to savour life's current moments, the more I'm able to hold on, and stay aboard what I call "The Synchronicity Train". I go through phases, when I'm on board, everything in life flows, even if something negative happens the solution presents it's self miraculously, or you bump into just the right person at the right moment, etc...on and on like that, like perfect links in the chain of life...but I always fall off this train...it's difficult not to get distracted... Some techniques for savouring use mindful morsels of food, slowly appreciated. I find personally, I best savour Nature, certain experiences, (and dark chocolate...lol..). It's hard to savour *everything*...For example: is Leo's video editing *savour worthy* because of the final result...or, is there a way to make tedious things awesome? I know there is...I've done it...like a ridiculous line up where I can get the bitter/ impatient folks around me laughing and having fun together instead...but how would you do this holistically in life...I have so much gratitude...but perhaps not enough yet...other techniques or ideas?

@Ray Former animator, huge Miyazaki fan...agreed...if more of our time was spent enjoying, with the wonder and awe of childhood life would sparkle!

Yes, this work is super important...I don't wish to be the barer of this news...but I'm afraid it will take much more than one sitting...there are some really cool techniques for working with your inner child...hopefully Leo will do a video someday...one of my favorites, other than the visualizations, is when you have an emotion, you can use your non-dominant hand to write messages from the child...really insightful....

There are times when it energetically feels like the modern equivalent of watching Buffalo Springfield play *For what it's worth* ("stop children what's that sound") *live for the first time*...and on occasion, we are actually present for these experiences (not just watching a video after the fact)! There are so many visionary performers, writers, artists, teachers/ speakers, etc... at this time. I have noticed many people choosing the comforts of home; missing out on these opportunities. Within a few days of each other, I just saw (for only $15 each): an incredible, revolutionary musical performance...one that invoked great awareness, inspired purpose, and called us to action in a ridiculously delightful way...plus one of the top 100 most spiritual people still living speak, also live...her words were clear in meaning, solid in weight, pure in heart, shimmering in inspiration, and totally devoted to our purposes. (Maybe I will do another post on these messages later). I live in a rural rainforest. I traveled to a small city, and another small town for these history worthy experiences. If you live in a big city, imagine what you may be missing...if there are no towns or cities near you, perhaps you can make your own history...regardless of where we are, we can experience, or make our own , profound experiences...alone, or with others... much of it has to do with the eye of the beholder...the ability to see the significance, the ability to savour it, with a willingness to learn and grow...thoughts?

@philosogi @Emerald I've realized, with self-honesty, that my self-efficacy still needs major work...both extensive upgrades and massive restorations.... a person with good self-efficacy would not be asking you these questions. Thanks so much for your time and insights!