The_Searcher

I was in a party and I tried to pull a girl from social circle. I didn't notice many attraction signs besides I can touch her arms, thighs, face and she liked it (she was already comfortable with me from previous meetups). She was passive, just went with the flow and did not chased me, I was mainly chasing her. She opened up about as I perceive to be a little vulnerable things and she developed a little bit caring attitude towards me. I did not kiss her that night, but we cuddled and fell asleep together. I am really confused about if there is any dating potential here. I want to test if she's attracted to me without being to obvious or straight to her face with that. Any Ideas how can I do that? Or should I just straight up ask her if she's into me? If more details needed I can fill in. Thank you guys.

@Leo Gura Yeah, I know. I asked if she would want to and maybe I'll reserve it for the future, will see how it goes. I think grab coffe/tea and a walk could be a nice starting date.

@Raze thanks for the recources. I do not remember all expressions but hit a few.

@Bazooka Jesus remids me of that funny casually explained video. That's how it feels to be newbie at dating https://youtu.be/xa-4IAR_9Yw?si=2t_g6fAKJyLTZC0q

@Chives99 She does not have a boyfriend. She does text back and stops untill I text something later. Maybe it's just how she goes.

@Leo Gura Sometimes she does, sometimes she leaves me unread. I am planning to take her out, since she mentioned she wanted to go to a movie. Thanks for clarification.

I am not advanced on spiritual level, but it's weird that AI is even considered being God. In a big picture I believe you can only create AI up to a level of understanding where you at, not higher. Like sure with AI you can make cool stuff, cool pictures whatever, it's amazing. Based on Leo's talks, God is transhuman, transracional, transmaterialistic, absolute everything, but we considering to put God in a box called AI. This doesn't compute to me even on logical level, unless we talking about different God.

It's one thing to be doubtful and not trying it. I feel you, I am too hesitant to do therapy. Especially if you have no trust in that. I can comfort you that no one forces you to take pills, all they can do is recommend them. Then it's your choice if you want to take them or not. Do your own research what medications therapist recommends. If you are against taking pills you are free to talk about it with your therapist. And if you try pills and they do more harm then good, then therapist should try something else. Brute force won't work. To deal with mental problems is to accept, and work with yourself and not against yourself with brute force. Don't get it wrong having physical activities, cutting stimulation and consumption can be beneficial. I would say try it. If something wrong change a therapist, try again. Look what's best for you and look for therapist who's looking what is best for you. You will need to work through your own distrust. Deconstruct your own distrust, as you are capable of doing that. I am myself considering to go to therapy and I am working through my own concerns.

Well I am glad I'm not alone. Weird how mind tends to limit itself. Nah, for me kind of weird not in a good way.

Hey, I had interesting experience yesterday on cannabis. I feel my anxiety and cannabis is connected. I'm trying to kill two birds with one stone here by talking about the experience and anxiety. I will have few questions, because I seek outside perspective, but feel free to add your own insights. Any help is appreciated. Background I smoked weed on occasion like 4-3 years ago. It always made me introspective, and made me a little anxious from the beginning of each experience. It felt a bit psychedelic, I wouldn't call it chill drug. When I used weed my thoughts naturally went to more existential and self development topics. In that time I was in a stressful but relatively good mental state it felt steady. Being aware of existence felt good. Until I got to college, stress was building up, anxiety too. In that time I had bad edible experience I had a panic attack. We have to keep in mind that I had panic attacks before and I dealt with it few years back. Going to college my anxiety worsened and started having panic attacks, at that time I quit weed entirely. My view on existence turned from bliss to "I don't even want to look at it". I got to the point where I was so anxious that I sometimes felt like for example car headlights had eyes, and other weird manifestations. But I was conscious that it's not true and it's mind weirdness in the experience itself. Like with cannabis sometimes I felt like I don't know where I am but I do know where I am. So I tried few times to come back to weed. Started form CBD. I had anxiety even before using CBD and during. Until I get used to it and I feel relatively fine, I still do feel some anxiety. Let me explain why I fear it so much. I feel like I don't want to be present, or introspective because it brings existential dread mentioned above. I don't like to be trapped in bad experience I don't want, learnt from my panic attacks and anxiety. And I had grandfather who had delusion disorder, so I'm worried that weed or psychedelics can induce psychosis or schizophrenia. My experience with car eyes that I told didn't help. Present I feel much better now, I don't have panic attacks and excessive anxiety because I'm currently not stressed. I still dealing with it. Experience Yesterday I used just a little amount. I don't know if I was even high. I was so anxious to do it, but did it anyway. I feel like I approached my anxiety differently then I did, I let it in, did not fight it, just watched with minimal judgment. Insight came that that's not weed that makes me anxious, that's me. I felt anxious but in a better way, like overcoming fear. Then I felt like I am not what I am. I felt like I was identifying myself to a feeling, like that existential dread is apart of me. And I started to feel more like when I was a kid. It felt good but also scary, because I was l losing myself by losing that dreaded feeling that I identified with. After effects Few hours later, in the evening I noticed that my mind is clearer than ever, more intuitive, faster, structured. It was like I had more RAM and better processor. I remembered that I had this mind, but it got lost somewhen. I started taking some supplements for my mental performance a week ago, but I noticed that after my weed experience. So I don't know if it was supplements or my experience somehow affected it. I would assume experience but I don't know fully. My questions Q1: What really happened when I seen eyes on cars? Should I be worried? Is this could mean I have predisposition to psychosis or other mental disease? Q2: Why I started changing my view on existence in such limiting way and started identifying with it? Anyone dealt with that? Q3: Why my anxiety felt not that bad when I used weed? Because I welcomed it? If then why it's so much harder to welcome in other situations or on other things? Q4: Do feeling like not myself is normal? Is that some kind of growth/healing I did?(it did feel like so) After thoughts It feels weird to talk about it. I'm still trying to put pieces together, that's why I'm asking perspectives from the outside. Thank you!

I would say there is no too much or too little, unless it's affecting your life negatively. There is no set number, sometimes you go long without having sex, sometimes you do it often. Sometimes you do it 3 times a week, sometimes you can go weeks without. If you both want it then do it, if not there is solo play. Just don't make a rule or demand out of it, just let it flow.

Hey, I'm pickup newbie. I read up some topics about how conscious is pickup. And I just got confused mainly about the balance of being authentic and being a player. I see some guys just don't like pickup because it's shallow, manipulative, survival based game, that you push some emotional buttons on women in order to get sex. And me myself for the large period of my life I hated that you kind of put a player mask in order to get girls. I imagined that you supposed to have a high energy, be super masculine, extremely social, extroverted, super confident etc. Kind of red-pill type of guy. So because I hated that so much I was discouraged to even do pickup. Probably a lot of conscious guys struggle with that too, or I assume so. Well I found a channel on YouTube accidentally after watching Leo's "get laid" series called "Natural Lifestyles" which ignited some hope that pickup doesn't have to be shallow red-pill thing. I'll talk about it in a bit. As I said what concerns me is the issue about being authentic vs being a player. I know authenticity is kind of a slippery slope since you are product of your environment and in a sense any change in your life is inauthentic. Learning math is inauthentic, not shitting in a middle of the street is inauthentic. But I've would like to be as much as myself as possible in pickup. Sure I will have to learn principles of attraction and all that. I just don't want to be what I'm not, that means wear a player's mask and be dishonest towards a girl. Fake until you make it type of scenario where I'm not me but some player type dude. What if I attract a girl by being super confident, extroverted, high energy and then she sees the true me, the introverted, calm guy? I would be a bit disappointed since the high energy me was just a facade. Where is that balance point? Also I found in this forum how Leo said making a poem for a girl is creepy. I see how it can be creepy, but is it really? Or is delivery and confidence that makes it creepy or not? Maybe not right kind of girl? I think this is good example of authenticity vs player dynamic. I remembered that I with the guys scerenaded girls for fun and girls liked it. Now I can see how easily that could became creepy. What "natural lifestyles" brought to the table is you don't have to be high energy, extroverted, super masculine etc. It's really enough to know the rules of the game and learn principles of attraction. Just like we have society's rules but we do have wiggle room to be authentic. At least what I understood watching some of their videos. They are more go with the flow adapts to the situation. Like for example they bring different parts of themselves based on a girl, if she's shy they don't be high energy, over the top ones. I see players that they must be the high energy. The problem may be that I have a distorted image that players must be these manipulative, overconfident, masculine, high energy etc. guys. Or other blind spot and that's why I'm here. If you want to see how wrong you are just post it on internet haha. I'm interested to hear how you balance authenticity and pickup. Any insights?

I recently found their channel. I instantly vibed with them. I like them a lot since they are not classical red-pill type of guys. I love how Natural Lifestyles incorporates low energy, introverted, empathic pickup without putting some fake high energy persona. Honestly I assume @Karmadhi would like that too and answer original concern.

That's funny how you put it lol. It goes deep. Yeah, exactly.

Maybe I need to change my sources lol. Social media definitely attracts more eyeballs in which there a lot of crazy people.

I noticed that too lol. I see some people leaning left. Am I the only one who sees the problem with left's authoritarianism and censorship, having some nasty tactics as silencing, blaming, name calling such as transphobic, demanding, victimizing themselves? I kind of dig JP's video about twitter ban. Although JP is being excessively mad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYfKWQqvFac

@Carl-Richard I know it's an older topic, but I vibe with your opinions from a quick look. @BeHereNow The big question for me is why being trans is important? What identifying as a gender brings you? Trans people say that it's limiting to be assigned sex at birth. But isn't identifying as gender is limiting? To me trans goals would be not to identify, but free yourself from conformity of gender entirely. Where you don't put such importance on gender and allow yourself to express however you want. To me it seems like trans people don't want to conform but gets trapped in another conformity(of their own ideology). This what I cannot understand about trans fundamentally.

Well I wouldn't put Sadhguru in blue stage. Although his views on psychedelics very conservative and close minded which seems like unsolved stage blue problem. But overall his teachings comparatively are way better than stage blue traditional religious dogma.

I heard that brain fully develops when you are about 25 years old. That's the age where it would be ideal age to start. But don't trust me on that, additional research needed. But I think it's a good place to start. Many people start using substances way younger than that despite any research. It may be fine if you are younger, but again fact check that. Most concerns are about developmental issues.

Yeah, I get it. Good to vent your frustrations and let it go. It is done. I would be frustrated too. Next time you know better as we all do. Good luck next time. @Benton had some good points.

@Ramu Yeah it sucks. You win, you lose sometimes.

Not an expert, but if it works it works. Nothing wrong with exploring different ways of perspective if it's not damaging. Personally I had interesting experiences with caffeine although not really good ones. Best I can explain is being "too awake". It made me anxious about being real or existing. I assume it was some existential anxiety creeping up that I didn't dealt with. I think you can extract some stuff from caffeine, pun included.

Was it your first experience with LSD @Ramu? Well I think you can expect all you want but sometimes you could get nothing. There is no guarantee psychedelics will bring what you want. Of course set intention more likely bring what you want. I guess your every experience with weed did not bring significant insights every time. Try again, and if you feel like it's affecting you bad stop taking it. Try changing sourcing if you have any other trusted sources. And as said by other answers make sure you get pure, right substance.

I don't know exactly what happened with who. But Fresh and Fit does questionable things. Like for example to be in a podcast woman is required to date him first. I would not be surprised that accusations could be true or partially true. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac1I09KczwA&ab_channel=KevinRayWilder

@Leo Gura I'm new here. Reading up stuff. Not gonna lie I have culture shock what I read about here. Took quite a bit of open-mindedness. But I can't understand why to do this sort of stuff as being highly conscious. Is this even satisfying to pick girls for sex? I feel like my moral compass would not allow that and I'm just empathizing to a guy who's being cheated. Or why would you do something that that woman probably regret doing. To me seems brutal.