Jay Ray

I have been interested in seeing something supernatural for a long time now. In my whole life, I have never seen anything that I would call supernatural but I know people who claim to have seen ghosts or demons/spirits. my questions is: Am I in danger if I consciousness try to summon anything for the soul purpose of education? I just want to see if it is real for myself but I also don't want to get possessed or ruin my life. I really don't care what it is, but I just want to see something, anything at all that I can't explain from a rational materialistic worldview. if it is safe, any tips on how to do this? Thank you.

while meditation, sometimes If I try and put space during this time by thinking "oh this is not me, this is just the ego, I am not ignoring or denying that the ego exits, but I am not going to identifying with it." this causes my ego to freak out. This happens a lot when I am in a really bad mood. Sometimes literally, in my minds ear I will hear it scream. "no, don't leave me, please don't" "Im scared, please don't do this." "you need me, why are you doing this to me?" "I hate you, I hate every part of you." (this one is very common) "please stop it." (this repeats sometimes 50 times in a row) I then feel the left side of my body starts to freak out. Sometimes out of nowhere my arm will hit my leg. I will have this uncontrollable rage that almost feels like it is out of my control. This rage hates the "ugliness" of the ego's rage Thus creating a cycle of more rage. it hate's that it feels hatred towards itself and hates that it acts out. My ego wants to be seen as a person and not a being made up of words and ideas. It feels like a living being and trying to make an attempt to disconnect with it causes this weird situation. this doesn't happen everyday but it is still an experience that I want to understand more. What should I do? Is it a good idea, to view the ego in this state as just a lifeless object made up of sentences and associations or is it useful to treat it like a human. being. thank you!

@Bogdan that makes sense, to be honest I really don't want to look into spirits and demons because I know it would scare that shit out of me and I probably would flee the spiritual path if I had a nasty encounter. I want to have an enlightenment or non-dual experience and to create peace, that I what I am after. I want peace. the only reason I brought up the fact that my ego was screaming was the fact that I wanted to know if others have experienced it or if it was a sign or progress or completely not important. it was just really noteworthy and quite different from my normal thoughts but had a very familiar feeling too. I really feels like the old "me" was talking not some random other entity, If I was to not pay attention and skip meditation for a month, it would be me again. This is my line of thinking thanks! Jay

wow, this dude's clarity is on-par. very clear and short vids

@DreamScape thank you, I now see the ego as a separate thing from me but I am not trying to get rid of it, I see it like a boombox, It just makes noises that I can ignore if I really wanted or I could listen to it depending on the situation.

@Artsu I am like 90% sure that this is what is going on but I am open to the idea that it could be a spirit. my whole life I have lived a very egoistic life and this voice seems VERY familiar in a sense not like a random thing I think.

@Bogdan that makes a lot of sense, thank you!

Thank you all for the advice you gave. I will attempt to see if it is a spirit but I still feel like this thing is "me". It feels like the same old sense of self that I have had for my whole life but now it is under intense observation and that is why it is screaming ""I" am dying or being ripped out/abandoned. " it feels familiar just a side of it that I haven't seen much of before. for 98% of my life I have been VERY egotistical and constantly worried about "me" and my own self-preservation. I lived in constant worry and trying to control the situation in order to make sure "I felt good and I was ok". this led to nothing but misery. this feels like the same kind of self-persevering feeling. the manipulative and strong-willed power that has ruled my life for so long.

@Artsu if it is a spirit then what should I do about it then? any advice on how to proceed? thanks!

@Artsu I feel like this voice is trying to identify it's self as "me" with ever fiber of it's being, it wants "back in" and to be me and not thinking it is me makes it mad. I am not sure if it is a spirit but I am not sure how to even tell if that is the case or not. If feels like peace is created along side frustration when I try and dis-identify with it though.

@Aaron p No I haven't used any substances before. I feel in control if I stop focusing on the ego during meditation and everything goes back to normal. what I was really wondering is how to interpret this experience. Is there any value to think of the ego as anything other than just a "thing" and not me. thank you

It is weird to think that "I" am that parasite or so I have thought for 99% of my life. trippy stuff.

@WelcometoReality That is good to know. Thank you!

I am trying to unify my spiritual path with my external life plans. I am having a really hard time in a few different aspects. One is that every one of my family and friends are at blue/orange and they think that this spiritual path is "demonic" or "hippy-dippy". I don't know what to do because I have no one in my life who even is willing to consider the stuff that Leo says or is even willing to watch one of his videos. I feel like they are dragging me down the spiral sometimes. I feel completely isolated and alone. My question is, should I seek their approval at all? I know that most spiritual people say "don't seek approval from others" but I don't know how when I feel this alone and belief isolated. Do I need people in my life to help me on my spiritual path, Should I seek them out ? is spirituality enough by itself? can I make it on my own surrounded by stage blue? If not, how can I find people at stage green+ (preferably a bit of stage yellow) ? I feel like I want a deep, in person connection or at least I want to talk with them voice, to voice. I feel like my stage blue/orange friends and family are holding me back but I love them dearly. I want them to be happy and feel loved and I want them to not be worried about me. I want them to go up the spiral and they want me to go down the spiral. It is even worse because everyone at blue/orange seems to be happy and content when I am not happy at that spiral stage anymore. Are there any resources to help me with my questions? What should I do? Thank you so much.

@Boethius Thank you, the video was helpful!

Because the things I used to like at stage Orange do not make me happy anymore for more than a day or so. Every hobby I used to define myself now feels cheep and ultimately finite. I cant get that sense of deep wonder that I used to get from stuff and hobbies. So this seems like the only option for me. This work seems like it is the only way out of feeling lack. Also, everything in Leo's videos fascinates me and I love being at stage yellow and looking at everything from tons of different perspectives.

Hello, I have been trying to do some chakra meditations but I am still a beginner. I have a few questions If I chose a spot (like the solar plexus or root) and the spot I chose is a bit off from it's actual location, is this a problem? how specific do I need to be when meditating on the chakras ? I really am confused on the exact location of them, but is this a problem? Will meditating on the Chakra produce a feedback sensation to allow me to know if I am doing it right? If I am an inch or so off,then will this be a problem or is it more about the intention of meditating on them? which resources are the best to learn properly? Thank you guys so much!

@Aaron p awesome, thanks!

I originally wrote this as a response to someone who was having trouble understanding that every object is made of awareness. think about it like this, Imagine you live in a Lego world. You are a Lego man and everything you have ever seen is made of Lego's. You are made of Legos, your car and house is made of Lego's and so are all of your friends as well as every possession that you own. now lets say that one of your Lego friends says "wait, that over there is a house, not Lego's, you see it has such and such dualistic qualities, therefore a house exists....it is a house. end of story" no, that over there is not a house, it is Lego's that you call a house. Another person may disagree that it is a house. However disagreement that it is a house doesn't take away from the fact that it is made of Lego's. but really all that there is is Lego's in this example. the same is true of consciousness. There isn't "a notebook" for example, there is awareness that has been named "notebook", someone may see it differently or call it something else. However the awareness of it still is there and does not need a name. Without these names for things, it would seriously impede human survival, If you didn't know the difference between "food" and "poison" this would be fatal, but both are made of the same thing, consciousness. Lego food and Lego poison are both make of the same thing. I hope this metaphor helps.

@FredFred think about it like this, Imagine you live in a Lego world. You are a Lego man and everything you have ever seen is made of Lego's. You are made of Legos, your car and house is made of Lego's and so are all of your friends as well as every possession that you own. now lets say that one of your Lego friends says "wait, that over there is a house, not Lego's, you see it has such and such dualistic qualities, therefore a house exists....it is a house. end of story" no, that over there is not a house, it is Lego's that you call a house. Another person my disagree that it is a house. however disagreement that it is a house doesn't take away from the fact that it is made of Lego's. but really all that there is is Lego's in this example. that same is true of consciousness. There isn't "a notebook" there is awareness that has been named "notebook", someone may see it differently or call it something else. However the awareness of it still is there and does not need a name. Without these names for things, it would seriously impede human survival, If you didn't know the difference between "food" and "poison" this would be fatal, but both are made of the same thing, consciousness. Lego food and Lego poison are both make of the same thing. I hope this metaphor helps.

I had a dream years ago about the number 222. Originally I was terrified of this number, but later I started accepting it. I have seen 222 over and over sometimes daily on product SKU's and bar codes at work, on phone numbers. sometimes when I close my eyes I see 222 and I wake up thinking about it. Does anyone know what 222 means? Thanks

@Chumbimba I feel the same way. Having face to face contact with others (even on zoom or Skype) would be awesome. Maybe even having small groups on Skype would be cool.

I had a realization. I am not sure If I heard this from somewhere else or If I discovered it myself. but anyway here it goes. when you question survival instincts, the ego creates an endless automatic tautology. for example: why don't you want to drop a bowling ball on your foot right now? well,I don't want to because that would hurt why don't you want to hurt? I don't want to feel pain. why don't you want to feel pain? why not seek lots of pain? well, I don't want to feel pain because I don't want to feel pain. why is that so? I don't want to feel pain because I don't want to feel pain, therefore I don't want to feel pain so that I don't feel pain............................. This doesn't go anywhere at all. It just loops endlessly or cops out by saying I don't know why, but I know that I don't want to feel pain. I just don't want to feel pain (this just means without having a known reason for it) I don't have a reason, I just don't want to feel pain. This question is stupid. Of course it is normal to not want to feel pain. this same tautology happens with pleasure and happiness too I want to feel good because I want to feel good. Maybe these thoughts are just put there for our survival. The inherent stubbornness and repetitive nature may suggest that it isn't a part of "me". It is automatic and is just assumed to be "my opinion". Maybe we don't make these thoughts, they are just automatically created on behalf of our survival needs. each tautology seems to not be logical at all, but completely functional. It seems to serve a function or a purpose rather then being just a creative opinion. for the sake of a mental exercise, maybe doubting these tautologies may be useful? (only in the mind not acted out!) I don't want to feel pain because I don't want to feel pain. who said that? is this true? maybe this isn't true at all and this inst "me" creating this thought. maybe pain is ok? maybe I am fine with it. If "I" cant come up with anything better that a tautology, then maybe it isnt logical at all to assume that "I" created this thought. I would love to hear what you guys think about this? Thanks

A few days before my grandma passed, here usual face of which was a mixture of happiness but with a lot of anger and contempt for life was radically transformed into pure bliss. I wasn't their at the time, but my mom sent me a picture of my grandma's face a few days before she passed and I have never seen a more authentic smile. It was like a life time of penny-pinching and blaming others fell away. Maybe she saw a glimpse of enlightenment or God, I am not sure. but I can say, seeing this photo of her changed my life. I fear death so much less now that I used to.

@Potato People King thanks for the advice. I think I will go for a tranquil mind instead. That sounds like a better use of my time the more I think about it.