Princess Arabia

Thing is, everybody is looking for shit to make sense. 'It doesn't make sense to me if so and so is this and so and so is that". Does it make sense that your poppa looked at your momma in lust, momma had you and now you have to figure out life. (one scenario out of many, make your own up here, doesn't matter) Does it make sense that you were a fucking embryo at one time and you made it through some woman's birth canal and womb and she had to carry you for 9 friggin' mths and pushed you out of her vajay jay, with some strangers looking down her pum pum hole while they say push, push, then you come out screaming like a little whimp with hands and feet all free flowing and not tied together with some rope then a friggin' cord was cut to free you from the fuckin misery and pain you caused her.......only to come here on earth to suffer yourself and want to seek enlightenment. All because some man couldn't keep his little teeny weeny in his pants, you have to suffer.......DOES THAT FUCKING MAKE SENSE. On top of that ALL THAT JUST TO DIE. Go ahead with your sense-making thinking that you got shit all figured out. If you weren't born into this shit, it wouldn't make sense to you either. If it's not familiar, it won't make sense. Only reason things make sense to you AS THE FUCKING KNOWING energy that you are is because it is KNOWN. Whatever constitutes for that to make sense you already know. So it makes sense. You have constructed it from the known. You are a dreaming machine that is constructing the dream from scratch. From you were a somebody. From when you knew yourself to be a self. From whatever age that was 4-7yrs old. The energy that arose within the body that contracted from your mommas contractions and now you know yourself to be one and others many. Life started to make sense then. Whatever causes that energy to seemingly contract that made it seem like you know anything and now you've eaten the fruit of knowledge from the tree and now you've ostracized yourself from the rest of the world and trying to make sense of it with the illusory senses that you think you possess. No, no,no, no, no, nothing makes sense. From your so-called birth to your so-called death you've been defending that sense of self while you think you can figure shit out to make a life for yourself. Well, I have news for you. You borne yourself and that's it. Now, make that make sense.

Nite, nite. Going to bed myself. ❤️

Duality is also non-dual, neither really exists. Only totality does which is nothing. All I'm doing is exposing the totality. Kind of deconstructing the duality. Exposing the illusory nature of it all.

You are hallucinating yourself into existence so everything now to you is real. I AM, so therefore everything is. I am here so therefore everything else is there. It's an illusion. There is no you there and me here, it's all timeless energy being both with no where going, started or finishing. It's like a night dream. Seems in the head but it's nowhere timeless, boundless, no space and it's all not really happening. It cannot be applied or lived or experienced. It's like an illusion trying to figure itself out. It can't because it's not really happening, it's an appearance like a shadow is an appearance and a rainbow and the sun's rays. Get rid of the source and they're gone. You are the source, youre gone and everything's gone.

Like I said, chaotic and free. Anything can appear without notice and with notice. Doesn't matter. Planned or not. Expected or not. All appearing out of nothing.

Lol. You so crazy!!! Love you.

If we really pay attention, we can see the total inconsistencies in life, the anarchic nature of it. Really. It's there. Very subtle, but it's there. I'm not even speaking about wars and the obvious things that makes no sense or spontaneously happening but small, little details and things that make one go, hmm. Pay attention, without judgements and you'll start to notice them. See things for what they are and take your ideas and opinions out of the picture; iow, get out the way. When one limits their biases and judgements, isn't self-absorbed and doesn't care about right and wrong, it gets easy to see. The reason why most people can't see certain things is because they care if they live. When one doesn't care if they live or die, not in the suicidal sense or depressed sense, but could also be happy with life when one truly sees or understands this is simply magic happening, nothing is serious and it's all made-up shit, and that no one is really alive and kicking, this is all a miracle and nothing bad can happen to anyone really, they can truly see life as it is. Spontaneous and free. Bring in the neurotic self, the selfish ego, the brainwashed, fearful and only about me, me, me, life then becomes a thing to survive and the self a thing to defend and the veils are on and now, it's all contracted and wants to get, get, get, get, looking for value and ways to sustain itself, these things closes one off to the rawness of life. It's very chaotic and free.

Any answer anybody gives other than the Absolute nothingness that is, can appear however it wants because it is totally free to be so and this is total anarchy and doesn't make any sense, will be a story. All stories and made up shit. The answer is total freedom appearing, appearing as any and everything. We use the senses to make sense of what we think we're in relation to. There's no relation to anything and it's all immediate and without true cause and effect. There are no rules to this.

Bingo

The thing that's on my mind a lot lately is the senses. I've been delving into that and thinking about it. It's my new curiosity endeavor. How can two seeming separate people hear the same thing from different ears. Insert any sense there. Smell the same thing with different noses, see with different eyes, etc. Say I'm in a car and passed a dog on the sidewalk. The man behind me in his car sees the same dog with his eyes. We are two different people seeing the same thing with a different set of eyes. How's that even possible. I'll say my eyes belong to me and he'll say his eyes are his, but we can see the same things. I hear a bang, and he hears a bang, different ears. I smell bacon and he smells bacon, different noses. The common denominator is the thing being sensed. If someone slaps me, he's not going to feel it, I will. So, he can see the same things I see and hear the same things I hear but can't feel for me. I mean, he can indirectly, but you know what I mean. In a public transportation, everyone looking out from a different set of eyes but seeing the same things. The only common denominator is the thing being seen yet separate people born from a different womb, with different DNA, cells and make up sees the same thing. How's that possible. In non-dual circles it's said that seeing is just happening but by no one....hmmm. The more I investigate this shit, is the scarier it gets. Hello, anyone there! Lol. Yeah, ok, sure answer me you Absolute you.

I'm not even going to argue with anyone (much, lol) about their take on God/Reality/Existence/Absolute. I might say something in opposition or disagree or something of the sort, might; but as far as I'm concerned, it's all wrong and right or not the exact picture including what I have to say about it. It's nothing, even though it's a "something" nothing, but every and everything anybody has to say about it will be perspectival and all perspectives are false because that's looking at it from an angle and there's no separation. I'm not saying no one is close or have great insights or have an idea or can speak on it or whatever. Shit, i'm doing that in this whole journal, pretty much. It's what I've understood it to be from the knowledge i've acquired, my own experience and intuition. None of it is Absolute because language is dualistic, limited and relative; relative to the one speaking it from their perspective. All perspectives are false. All. Perspectives are illusory. The person speaking is illusory. No one knows it all. Can't. No separation and it's infinite and limitless. The self is illusory. If we want to call the Absolute the SELF, then so be it. That's all there is. So why argue with the Absolute. Sure, arguments and debates and pov's, etc., are welcome and is to be expected, but none of it is total. This is totality already, so everything said is total. If I say "hum", that's everything. If I say "dog" that's everything. Everything is everything. If I say everything is not everything, that's still everything. If I say it's not infinite, that's everything. Nothing is being everything so some hogwash explanation of reality is still nothing saying that. Nothing can't be wrong in the Absolute sense since it's nothing. One might argue and say how do you know it's nothing. Well, i don't, but it's the only explanation for everything. Infinity is nothing. No-thing. Can't get something from something. The initial something has to have a Source. Trace back and there's no end. Nothing has to be what existence is or else there couldn't be anything appearing.

Oooooooh, Leo is working on his book. Ma baby, writing a book. Can't wait.....just because.....for it's own sake. I'll be like...BUT LEO. Hehe. Maybe he'll ask for my address and send me an autographed copy but deliver it personally. Does that sound too culty....i'm not a fan just an admirer. Don't hate. Leo be like"BUT PRINCESS". He's used to my antics. He ignores them. Good.

Do you really think that person you see walking down the road, has a brain with electrical shit going on inside their head. Do you really think there are cells walking down the street in that body working like construction workers. Do you really think that person you see has kidneys, a liver, an appendix, a heart, gall bladder, irises, hair follicles, eyeballs, inner ear, outer ear, a skeletal and a muscular system, however many systems and bones that makes up the human body, a tongue, a nose that breathes air in and out....i mean I could go on and on about what the human body entails and all it's features. Do you really think that person is walking around with all that in working order and working for decades while the person is just worried about sex, relationships, drugs, who they hate, what they like, survival and working from home to pay the bills. That's a lotta load. These bodies are fucking empty. Not a single organ is doing anything. Cut her open, there's a beating heart, that fucking heart is like rumpelstillskin. I'm telling you, this is utter magic.

That person is not you; there is no you.

We say the Absolute/All There Is/God....whatever word....is undefined and indescribable. It is. It is every descriptive word. It is every behavior, it is every persona, every identity, every mood, sensation, state, phase....everything. It can be talked about; everything in life is it. It is mean, kind, loving, hateful, envious, dependent, happy, joyous, blissful, sorrowful, quiet, noisy, melodical, scary, bright, intelligent, stupid. What do we think is being all these things. It's the Absolute being all that. No one is doing anything on their own. No one is smart or stupid, intelligent or wise, or whatever trait. It's all being played out as/by the Absolute. No one built anything, the Absolute is being every creation. Nothing was really ever created. It's all the Absolute, BEING. Do you really think that all 8billion people is doing all this and that we were taught anything and learnt anything. No, it's all the Absolute's doing. Nobody has ever lifted a finger. No one has ever built any technologies, no one has ever went to Mars or the moon and no one has ever gotten pregnant and delivered a baby. No one has ever done a friggin' thing in the whole of existence. It's all the Absolute BEING.

Babies and toddlers make most people smile, especially when they're smiling back at them. We see innocence in babies and toddlers and very young children. They melt our hearts, especially babies when they're cute and cuddly. Adults are innocent too, but we project evil unto them. We walk around in seriousness and see people as the enemy and untrustworthy. Strangers and people we don't even know. Automatically they're the unknown enemy because of projections and memory and brain images. Babies, toddlers and young children have done nothing wrong to us so we smile at them and keep it moving. If a cute little toddler, say 3-5 years old looks out the car window and smiles and wave, we wave back and say, awww, so cute. Adults don't do that. It's a no, no, unless you want to be considered a pervert or a homo, or she/he must like me. Random smiles and waves to be accepted and responded to innocently is reserved for babies and kids. Adults, however, watch out, you want something or you're weird. Once we have lived enough to get rejected, disappointed and let down by people, we project that unto the whole world. Now we have to prove ourselves.....except for the automatic innocents' like babies, toddlers and young children.

Lol. It's me. Keryo is me. Lol

Weird how I always thought that was you. Weirder how you're the contact buddy.

No words.

This will be Santiago in a week singing to Leo and the forum.

I listened to this like 10-15x. It's still playing while I'm typing this. Whatever THIS is, it's truly an amazing singer. That's all i hear when this lady belts these chords. I hear Absolute melodical genius.

Self-Inquiry is just another trick intact to keep the illusion of self in place. Keep noticing awareness. You are the awareness of these things. Place your awareness on your awareness. You are not the body, you are the awareness of the body. You are not the mind, you are the awareness of the mind. There is something that never changes and you are that. Focus on fucking that. Just the mention of the word focus is a fucking self inquiry trap. Who's focusing and what is being focused on and why. Answer those questions and.....delusion galore. The person, the individual must get tired of itself one day when it gets exhausted of trying to become something it never will. The poor body gets old and dried up before that will ever happen and shrivels up with exhaustion from looking out for and searching for this invisible awareness and empty space it thinks it is. Then this awareness and empty space dreams up an after life for it to come back to to do more hard and tedious work of trying to stay in awareness and become a nobody. The genius design of the Universe to keep this nothing into something and for nothing to be able to tell a story to it's children. Imagine nothing staying nothing forever; how boring and dull that would be. Please stop whining and bickering because you don't want to be nothing you want something to whine and bicker about so you can feel something. It's all magic. Nothing being something is magic. There cannot be something out of something, has to be no-thing before it can be something. Would you bitch and wine for nothing. Self-inquiry keeps us in the illusion. Though, not really. All spiritual practices speaks to the dream. Though not really. All teachings and gurus speaks to the dream, though not really because the dream isn't really happening and the dream and the dreamer are one and there's only what is and what is is all there is.

HUMANS ARE LIKE BABIES CRYING OUT FOR MOMMA.......in every way. LITERALLY. Cry cry baby, munch and darling take off your shoes and go to bed.

This is freedom and freedom is free to be anything; including being stupid and silly. Anyway it wants. It doesn't really want, it just is, including the judgments and criticisms about the different ways it appears. It isn't personal and doesn't see conditions, it's so free. Actually it does, that also is freedom seeing conditionally. It doesn't even see, that's how hard it is to talk about this stuff; how do you talk about everything. Why do you think we needed rules and laws to govern this freedom. Freedom is governing itself. You think humans are silly and foolish and unwise and whatever else, no, they are expressions of freedom. How can something be free if it's not free to be stupid and foolish too. Goddamit, forget about yourselves for a minute, forget about your biases and agendas and prejudices and phobias and fears, forget about you for a sec, everything including all I just mentioned is freedom expressing itself. Anarchy. Try to see life as not about you, as nothing to get or gain, as nothing to become as noone to fix, as nothing to accept, let go of, or surrender to, nothing to judge or not judge, criticize or not criticize, love or not love, fear or not fear, see it all as JUST WHAT IS. Even your judgements of it. Don't try to accept, reject or needing anything to change. Nothing at all. Just for a day, try to live like that. Don't care how you look that day or even smell, don't care what you eat or drink or say or think or whatever...JUST FOR ONE DAY, GET A TASTE OF WHAT FREEDOM REALLY IS LIKE. All that is miniscule in comparison. That's also freedom. Can't escape freedom. The feeling is what counts, what matters (to the individual), The individual is freedom's expression but it can't feel free; freedom is not personal nor is it catered to anyone; all one can do is try to get a taste of what it's like to feel free, not be free, but feel free and because we are expressions of freedom already and freedom itself appearing as....WE CANNOT BE FREE. It's like water trying to be fucking water. Do you get it or not. It's already fucking done.