Princess Arabia

Explain away, explain away, what millions of men think but some won't say. No need explaining, guys think this all the time it's just it sounds funny when heard. You're seeming to think it's only with sexually frustrated. Lots of men getting pussy left and right will still act that way. The main reason I think is because they can and society has given men a free pass to be promiscuous without it having a negative impact on them socially.

When I say i've been traumatized I don't mean it in the normal sense of trauma. Imagine being labelled and put into a category simply because of what you do not for who you are. That can take a mental toll over the years. It's like you're ostracized while you sit back and watch "ordinary people" act like the real whores and tramps and be promiscuous and whore the town down just to get laid; by strangers, nonetheless. At least a girl gets to pay her bills from it but she's the tramp while "Mr. I'd Like To Tap That Ass" gets advice on how to get that done. That's the kind of trauma I'm talking about. Seeing the hypocrisy. Hearing the tales told of men who are whoring down the town so frivolously and spreading their dicks around to Mary and Sue for no other reason than to get laid, but a get paid woman is a tramp. I realize it's because women are supposed to be the prize and not give their shit away so loosely, I get that, the signs are everywhere but it still takes a little bit of a toll to see the competitors for the prize be so freeing with their tools while judging and criticizing the prized pool. I'm the first one to tell what I do and couldn't give two shits what anyone says just to get that out the way and neutralize the situation fast. At first it will be a shock to the system then an expectance (expecting me to act like their idea of one), then a normalcy phase then a what do you do again phase. It won't even come up again as I'll be so normal and they'd actually be the one drugging out life away, sexing up the whole town and partying like an animal every week-end, while I'm watching Rupert Spira waiting for my date who is a functional businessman alcoholic that works on computers for a very large cyber security firm but no one knows he sees escorts and has an only fans account and cheats on his wife and smokes weed because he doesn't fit the bill and works in a reputable company that's considered of a high caliber and only smart people work. That's where the trauma comes in. Seeing this shit played out for years and years while getting called out for what I do and not who I am as a person. It actually woke me up to realize it doesn't matter.

This is why I think twice about starting this type of journal because I know some projection is going to leak out and some things said that's not so flattering. Maybe it's the exact thing I need to get this stuff out and for it to get some breathing room. It's not all that serious, though, but as a working girl it can take a toll over the years to see how many of the atrocities have been committed by men and how some men can be who are professionals and are outstanding citizens of society but a female will get slack just for being on an adult website or selling her pussy. No one asks about her personality, if she's a mean girl or not, is she cruel and is she abusing men and clients or stealing and robbing or whatever. You do this for a living....you are this and you are that. While the clients get a free pass. They are the poor victims and the girls are taking advantage of lonely, fat, ugly men. So far from the truth. If anything, it's the men taking advantage of women stuck in this work for financial reasons or whatever else reason other than if it's done willingly. They pounce from woman to woman and carry on with their sexual fantasies and escapades of getting laid by strange and new women while the women go home after work and are usually faithful to their families.

This journal is not going to get me popular votes I can see that now. I have a little bit of a bone to pick from what I do and to get so much slack from men themselves for it and who have no shame in spreading their dicks around to who will take it. I have a little bit of an issue hearing men describe their loose ways while women are called whores and sluts for theirs. I have a little bit of an issue for when I see only fans girls get dogged out but guys can just proudly and openly share how they'd like to be with as many girls as they can and the more the merrier. I have a little bit of an issue when women are called out for being working girls when pick-up is just working men in reverse. I have a little bit of an issue when men can just be open with their "I'd like to bang that ass" comments and "the more the merrier remarks when asked about dating preference" when women get slack for trying to make a living doing this shit. Same shit men are doing. I don't see any much talk about relationships here only a few but lots of bang 'em and hot girls and 'closing' like a real estate transaction but we get slack and whoring guys get told prostitutes are low-conscious people by men who go to strip clubs where prostitution is going on in the back. It's called the champagne room. I have a little bit of an issue, not much but a little bit, when I see how women are supposed to act VS men and how their whoring ways are praised and they feel entitled to hot women and have a problem when women are picky and want to choose men of value. I'm not ranting just speaking my fucked up truth. Not all men, obviously and not even most, just some. When I see them I just want to puke, though. Don't blame me. I've been traumatized by this but not really. Just disgusted to see how men are the first to complain about women but they don't care about women but only for hedonistic pleasures and they judge working girls for doing the same thing they're doing only worse because it's just for carnal pleasure.

Of course it's not true. I never claimed anything to be true. It's just talking. Plus, obviously it's never ALL in any scenario. Do I have to say SOME for every sentence. Go read the relationship section do you see any men there caring about a female's personality and how kind and compassionate and all that jazz she is. All I see is how hot they are, cold approaching strangers to hook up with, congratulating guys who got laid or met some females and asking where the hottest sections of a city is or if they should pa k up and move to go get laid.

We are the prize period. Look at the stories. Men get congratulated just for meeting and hanging out with the prize. Men also don't care about personality to want to bang a chick. Tits and ass is enough. Nothing worth being a prize would want to stick their precious ting-a-ling- anywhere if it were precious. The difference is whether it's a hot prize or not. Then it's a homerun prize. Then unto the next prize. Like a yearly football match.

Ok. You're right as the dream. Can't deny that. "KNOWLEDGE of" is separation. There's none.

Ok. Word semantics at play.

I see a boat you won't see an orange, you'll also see a boat. The experience of seeing the boat is a different matter which i'm not referring to in the OP, just the raw seeing of it. How can I see a boat and you see a boat with different sets of eyes and different bodies if we are separate. I say there's no one actually in these bodies seeing anything and it's just seeing happening. No one seems to be getting this. You mentioned experiencing things the same when i didn't even mention experiencing anything.

Yeah, but I'm not referring to EXPERIENCING a thing. Just the raw seeing of it.

I'm not really trying to figure it out and I've already did the contemplations. No one is there seeing anything. This thread wasn't for me to get an answer to but to see if anyone could possibly explain this without illusion and fantasies. No one could and never will without denying their self.

Don't kid yourself. You didn't get laid because you didn't get laid.

Congrats for what. Meeting people. Or the kiss he had.

"Click bait" heading. How dramatic. Ten years from now this story will seem like a walk in the park after you've been through threesomes, orgies, break-ups, marriages, divorces, and a polygamous lifestyle.

You didn't even read the topic. Smh.

Ok. Both are. There are no actual objects and there is no actual subject. It's not even imaginary, it's just not there.

Thanks. Making my point.

Spiritual gain VS material gain is no different. PERIOD. The me will tell itself anything to feel important and different from the rest of me's. The only difference is in the content. Buying a blue shirt VS an orange one. Does the color orange make you feel better than blue and do you look better in orange so you'll feel better than when wearing the blue one. Everyone is after a feeling and that's what both spirituality and materialism is used for. Nothing else. The energy that arises that seems to feel a sense of separateness is the very same energy that feels the need for wholeness and completion. Both seek, both feel unfulfilled, both are un-eased, dis-eased. Spirituality is the crutch and materialism is the crutch. Neither is really happening and both are illusions. The seeker doesn't exist.

I will not argue such thing either way because I have no consciousness that can even be an illusion. There is no one to have consciousness. Exactly.

There is no one to know anything. Knowing is knowing that's it. No one there TO know.

Reality is not imaginary. You are. There just can't be a real entity that can realize an imaginary reality.

Correct. There's no one to know anything.

That's not what was said in this post. There's also a part that says awareness sees itself everywhere. You say it is one. How can something that's one sees another thing even if it's itself.

Another got no where post. Not many will attempt these notions because it imply no one there that's seeing anything and the senses are imaginary and perception is an illusion so is perspectives, consciousness and awareness. These are, don't get me wrong but they are for no one. No one owns anything. No one owns eyes. Those eyes are decorations , they see nothing. Seeing is just happening. I'm still waiting for an explanation to change my illusory perspective. No explanation in this thread explained how seeing the same things is possible from different bodies without splitting reality into pieces.

There's no awareness in me. Ideas are not in me. "Ideas in me that is awareness" can't be because awareness is supposed to be aware of ideas. You say we all see the same things but I guess except for the blind. Their shit's out of luck. You say boundless awareness then say they don't exist outside of awareness. Doesn't exist inside either if it's boundless because there is no outside or inside boundlessness. "Within boundless awareness" is a contradiction. Awareness cannot be infinitely boundless and also BE AWARE OF anything....that's not infinite. Awareness cannot be everything and also be AWARE OF ANYTHING. It also cannot be one with because that's separation that became one. ONE WITH implies two. Your whole narrative is flawed but it's OK, it's this awareness thing that gets people. No such thing.