Princess Arabia

Ok.

Problem right here. You don't trust yourself. You're even asking us to tell you what we think about your thinking. I think you've misunderstood what thinking for yourself actually means. It doesn't mean to question everything; nor does it mean you have to listen or not listen and adhere to other's perspectives. It's merely suggesting, imo, that you not just go by what other's say, but to follow your inner guidance and to try and be analytical using your own logic and reasoning capabilities so this way, you train the mind to not just be a follower but to be able to recognize and put in place what's more suitable for your life's circumstances and not for the majority. We all have different learning styles too; and personally, I like to get information from various sources so I have things to compare other things to. This is coming from a place where I love to have options. If I were to just follow one person's teaching style, I feel I would start to become that person (to a degree) and not have a mind of my own. To me, that leads to idolatry and impersonation and a loss of personal identity.

My point though is not about looking good but caring for caring sake. People shouldn't have to prove their worthiness to be shown some type of caring. A man doesn't have to prove himself to me for me to care about his challenges in life. I'm on a forum having a discussion, I don't need for you to prove to me why I should care about what you're going through in life and if I can be of assistance - in the dating world or not.

This is part of the problem right here why so many men are struggling with women. RIGHT HERE. They'll pretend, but women can sense these pretenses. You are not alone in feeling this way, and even though I'm giving you slack because I think you have strayed away from my point, never mind that, you have hit the nail on the head with this comment. At least you are being straight up and honest about it. Most women have sensed this and is one of the reasons they are fighting back and only going towards men of means and status because it's not worth the hassle and bustle of dealing with low stats men who don't care about their feelings and what it is they want and desire. Most men, of low caliber are usually out for just themselves while wanting a lot from their partners. This is a whole other topic. @NoSelfSelfthis says Princess Arabia said, but I was quoting you.

You have made this post about you. Cheers.

Right, you can't give what you don't have.

Thank you for this. I didn't stress on the safety issue because I didn't want this to be about fear and distrust. It is a major concern, though, and most times, especially if it's on the street us ladies have to be cautious of who we even smile at or say hi to. Most guys don't think about this because they really don't have this problem as much except to be drugged and robbed and that's not very common and usually in high-risk circumstances.

You're telling me about the one who is original. I'm not looking for an original man. I'm not even looking for one that looks beyond the body because I want him to be sexually attracted to me, just sees it as an accompaniment, not separate than - meaning, " oh, and her personality is great too". Not that, sees the whole package. I also don't need for a man to intrigue me. I'm not looking to adore or be "wowed" and to idolize. You are still projecting your beliefs unto what you think I want or desire in a man. Nothing in my post suggested any particular trait or what it is I'm looking for. All I did was expressed how it's not easy for us sometimes and that us ladies are also finding it challenging. You keep telling me what I want in a man and telling me how I don't know you and misunderstand you, when it seems to be the other way around. Please read my post again, to see how this is not about what I'm looking for in a man but that we are also having trouble be cause of how we date.

No, I'm looking for compatibility. One that complements my character. I don't need an original or one that stands out from the crowd. Even this right here shows how we're being misunderstood. I'm not doing a model search where they need to stand out from the crowd. Standing out from the crowd means you've already assessed the crowd to not be your type and he needs to stand out from the rest. Nothing in my post suggests that most guys just aren't my type. What I'm saying is, we have to do more than just look at a body to know this and it takes time and energy to realize if he is or not. Please don't project your existing beliefs unto what I'm trying to portray here and try to read and understand what I am saying VS what you think I'm trying to say. My post is pretty lengthy for this reason, so I could make myself clear on my position, plus I don't need a guy to have game.

I'm not referring to this. I'm not speaking about how others are being perceived by onlookers. I'm speaking about romantic relationships. Maybe be clear on what type of relationships you're referring to or just generally speaking. Also, not showing respect to someone who shows love to themselves isn't a bug it's a feature because on the flip side what you're seeing is a case of how you react to that. How does that make you feel and does it diminish how you feel about yourself. You will double down on your self worth if their disrespect and jealousy doesn't change how you feel about yourself and you understand that it's about them not you. Idk, I don't look to be loved, I look to be love. Sorry if my words sound woo woo and all but I cannot change who I am and my way of thinking and being is being reflected in my writings and it's just what's coming out.

Yes, I'm not speaking about non-duality. If we love ourselves, we will see others love us back in proportion to that. We cannot expect from others what we haven't given to ourselves.

If we love ourselves. We only get from people how we see ourselves.

Exactly.

Don't care about tik tok and social media dating stories. Nothing new under the sun. Just more publicized because of social media and our obsession with it. Watching that stuff and focusing on those types stuff does nothing but embed in our brains what we think the world is like, when in fact; successful, great quality, and happy relationships don't make the news as much or shown as much because it doesn't satisfy the mind's quench for drama and problems. By watching these stories you are not empowering or helping yourself, you are weakening and disempowering the mind to be more in a victimhood state. What are you getting from it? CONFIRMATION OF YOUR EXISTING BELIEFS - beliefs that are not serving you. You are a victim to your own circumstances.

Might be is speculation. Women aren't having sex with themselves.

Who the heck are these women with, themselves? Makes no sense.

I don't know, but it seems these women you're talking about that can easily find a man, these men are also with these women. Saying women can easily find a man yet complaining how hard it is for men to find women seems like an oxymoron. Obviously it's not hard for men because these women aren't with themselves or other women. IT'S MEN THEY'RE WITH. Your post is a great example that we have belief systems that aren't true; and we make them up as excuses as to why we're not accomplishing our goals. This one isn't obvious and kind of hard to see through because so many also believe what you're saying about how women finding it easy. So, you'll hear, "yeah man, you have to go out more and socialize". Yes, that's true; but how about addressing the fact that you're believing something that isn't true and it's showing up in your direct experience as so. I'm so sick of hearing about how women find it easy when that is also a misconception. Women can get laid whenever and by whomever, but women don't want to be, so they also have it hard finding the perfect lay, men are not as picky if it's just a lay they're looking for, as shown in your first sentence. Women have to usually feel something, men don't. It's not a judgement; it is what it is.

Haha, I tried to Google too and a bunch of recipes came up. Still not sure what it means. The did look good.

It's more of a pasta thing no matter the kind. Only if I'm doing Italian like Chicken Parm/Cacciatore/Meatballs or stuff like that with the red sauce; and even then I might sub mashed potatoes. Plus, not a fan of the spiral. Penne is good and spaghetti. Chick pea pasta is good.

🌚lol

You mean zucchini with stuff inside?

That vinaigrette looks delicious. That salad too, only since I'm not a big fan of pasta, I'd use romaine instead. Thats how I cook sometimes. Lots of Mediterranean style eating.

You're being pretty funny and more relaxed lately. This side of you is refreshing to see. Something has changed. This is how observant I am. I can tell.

Yes, it's delicious if that's your kind of thing. My main style of eating, though, is Mediterranean as Jamaican food, depending on what it is, can take some effort and time to prepare and cook and sometimes I don't want to be in the kitchen for long. Mediterranean food is a lot more healthy, simple and easier to prepare. I can whip up a salad in no time or some fish or beans like hummus or some veggies and a side of whatever.

This is what i mean.