Princess Arabia

I also remember this whack job of a post. Lol I smoked some weed that night and I'm not really a weed smoker, plus I was drinking red wine. I was a bit buzzed, but not drunk, a little high but not too much, that sweet spot. Either way it was an experience to remember. This post and the one above are my only posts of this nature.

Just thought I'd reminisce about my one and only glimpse of this. I was all excited and filled with awe of what I just experienced. It was actually in real time and as I was writing it it was happening. It was very colorful and i could see the aliveness of it all in real time. Sorry to say, it was only an experience and not any glimpse of anything real. It was only as real as what's happening now and what's happening now is as real as it gets. It was interesting to document, though, and it's probably the only experience I had that I'd like to revisit except to have my attached mother back here with me on planet earth. She's gone and I wish to see her again and laugh with her. If I had one wish, i'd wish for that. Her death woke me up to nothing.

I'll just keep my ass over here where I can freely write out my thoughts as long as it's within guidelines and leave those Spiritualists alone who don't care to want to hear anything that doesn't align with their dream constructs. Nobody cares what you have to say anyway. They're just here to express themselves with hopes that the rest resonates. Even when questions are asked and advice requested, it's still hoping and wishing to hear what they want to hear. I'm staying away now from even giving advice to anyone because it's not needed unless it's specifically asked of me. I've had enough of people telling me off about my views on things and I don't care to hear it anymore. I don't want to continue to mess up people's hopes and dreams of what it is they're hoping to see, hear or get from whatever it is they're hoping to see hear or get from life. There's enough spiritualists on here giving their two cents on what reality is about and what they think is happening, the less the better. Most only pay attention to the big man with the beard on the throne or the known guru who has followers anyway, so my little two cents is just a fly in the wind of nothingness that disappears from their existence the moment it's seen and only brings irritation and confusion to those who are trying to get something from it. It really doesn't matter if I contribute anything to the spirituality section, make a post or comment or respond, it's just talk and concepts and ideas. Won't change a thing. Won't make a difference in people's lives. Won't awaken or enlighten anyone and only brings on dislike, disgust, resentment and arguing. I'll just stick to my musings on the topic over here and whoever reads it it's on them. I distinctly note that they're my own writings and are not claims to be the truth or that I know anything to be the case. They are my thoughts on whatever I'm writing about and most of the time, if not all, is automatic, spontaneous and free-flowing. It's better this way because no one takes you seriously anyway and I don't want to be taken seriously because life ain't that serious. It's only serious to those afraid and attached and need to get something from it to cling to. I've been there done that and realize that nothing is forever and that life is to be lived not owned. Not even to be enjoyed because it will come at you with hurtful things all the time. It is to be lived which includes all the hurtful and negative things that will come our way. Why would I take something like that seriously. I don't take my pain seriously so I won't take my joys seriously either.

@AtmanIsBrahmanIf you make a post and I respond, there's no need to say that I'm preaching. It was merely a response. If I respond to something that you didn't want to hear that's fine but no need to tell me my perspective is limited and maybe I should be open to other perspectives. I am. I'm very open to other perspectives. Certain things to me are Absolute and one of them is that everything is an appearance and is not graspable. Every other perspective can come out of that and if it doesn't align, then I move unto another. If you don't agree, you don't agree.

It is not a perspective and I'm not preaching. All you have to do is notice it. All there is is appearances. Show me something that's not appearing. Show me something that appears and never disappears. I speak about a lot of things on this forum. In this section or my journal is mostly where I reserve these kinds of talks because it's appropriate and is usually on topic. I don't go into the dating section and tell someone their date appeared and that's all that's happening or that pick up is an illusion nor the politics section and say The Donald doesn't exist. If I find it appropriate to speak this way, to say nothing is graspable or it's all what's appearing, then I see nothing wrong with that and shouldn't have to make any apologies for doing so. I don't tell a person suffering that their suffering is what's appearing and that it will disappear. I do try and limit these kinds of talks to where and when I see fit.

Everybody's here asking all types of questions about life. What is experience, what are thoughts, what is God, what am I, who am I, what is infinity, what is reality, what is awareness, what is consciousness, what is this and what is that. Why the fuck do we have to rely on another stupid, delusional, neurotic, egotistical, selfish, corrupted, narcissistic, arrogant, biased, prejudice, racist, fool to tell us about somewhere we got dumped. Why is someone like Eckhart Tolle making millions off of unsuspecting, lost, suffering, miserable bodies that doesn't even know who they are. Why is life allowing this to happen. Why are people making money off of other's ignorance to something they never asked for. Why is Moojii sitting on a throne with people bowing down to him and kissing his feet, with a website and followers worshipping his every word while he basks in his millions or thousands whatever he makes off the Universe. Why do we have to meditate to find peace from some stupid phenomena called the mind and some hating bully called thoughts that brings us so much misery. We didn't invent this shit and called any of these silly things to ourselves, but we have to find ways and means to not let them destroy our sanity and have to put focus on trying to make ourselves happy so we feel good and not fucking want to jump off a cliff. Speaking about jumping off a cliff, why is that taboo and not recommended and will be put in an insane asylum if caught or the feat gets ruined because the cliff wasn't high enough and all that happened was a broken neck. No,no, we will punish you for trying to kill yourself and put you back into the circumstances that got you there in the first place. Better get it right the next time. This thing called life is a fucking hell hole and we celebrate life and mourn the dead. Most people are suffering but we are afraid to die and try to avoid death. Let me say, this is not a rant against life. It's to show how something weird is happening here. I'm not angry or frustrated about anything, I'm writing this because something just isn't right about this. Something's off. When I say that, I don't mean, things need to be different or I don't like it or anything like that. I could write a whole book on things like this and also about the joys and beauty of life. It so happens i'm writing about what sucks about life right now. This journal is about all of it. Not just the sweet and dandy and the Absolute and there's no you and life is all one and unity this and all is nothing that. Anything is on the table. There is actually an underlying message or point being shown here. To myself. That these thoughts can go rampant if they choose to or lovey dovey or practical or radical or whatever. They appear randomly like the wind and will be forgotten and discarded just like every other experience, situation, circumstance and everything about life will be gone in a flash and appear in a flash with no warning or planning. Life is that way and it's beautiful and it sucks. I don't want to be happy and i don't want to be sad. I don't want to be anything. All I know is there's no escaping what the hell this is so I'd better get used to it and prepare for the unexpected. Even when I write. I never go back to my writings I just write and move on. After this is done, it's done and on to the next. That's my fucking spiritual practice. Never looking back.

Sometimes I wonder: Sometimes I wonder if anyone ever stop to think, how did two people see each other, decided to mate, one sperm and one egg gets attached and nine months later here you are having to figure out this thing called life all by yourself. Lots of details left out and a trillion different circumstances in between, but that's pretty much generally what seemed to happened. A man sticks his penis inside a woman's vagina, ejaculates, and now here you are trying to awaken or get enlightened so you don't have to suffer. A woman pushes you out of her vagina and now you're responsible for making your life worthwhile. A man rapes a woman, she gets pregnant, decides to have the baby and that baby suffers their whole adult life because they made the wrong choices. Two people love each other, gets married, she gets pregnant, he dies, she has the baby, dies in the process and that does happen, and now an orphan is born and sent from foster home to foster home, gets traumatized from not receiving the love it needs and now that child is fucked and that's supposed to be how a life is born and is expected to flourish in the world. Billion other scenarios where the baby had no say in this but is expected to learn, get a degree or a trade, pay bills, raise a family and figure this shit out. Nobody talks about this. Everyone is just trotting on with life as if they are supposed to figure this shit out all on their own as adults after two people lusted after each other. Two people in a nightclub decide to drug it up, get drunk, he takes her home and fucks the shit outta her, she gets pregnant and now that baby better get it right or it will be poor, suffer or experience a bunch of shit to make it feel depressed or anxious, suicidal or whatever. Those two hippies who got drunk, got old and die and left that hippie baby that grew up and turned an adult all by themselves to figure out the rest of it's hippie life while they rot in the grave and doesn't have to face any more life consequences. I'll stop here, but that's why I say something very weird is going on here and i can't put my finger on it....or maybe I can but I'm in denial. Not sure but it's very weird. Oh you must go through suffering and pain for anything worthwhile. One must feel the pain, feel the suffering to awaken or to wake up or to be enlightened because being comfortable in life doesn't cut it. Get the fuck outta here with that hogwash. When those two people were getting it on and that baby becomes the result of a back seat roundevous, now that baby must suffer in order to awaken to their true nature. Oh I forgot, it's God forgetting who it is and pretending to be a fucked up corrupted human, so it can remember itself again. What a God.

You didn't grasp anything. Something appeared and something else appeared. Absolute cannot be grasped. It went away simply because it was only an appearance, like a smile from someone. Can you grasp that smile and hold unto it. No, it was simply an appearance. When someone's walking, can you hold on to that walk, grasp that walk. It's an appearance. An appearance disappears. Absolute Truth is also you trying to grasp Absolute Truth. The fact that you're trying to grasp something implies it's other than you. How can Absolute Truth have an other. You're not even inside Absolute Truth. You are not even Absolute Truth. Absolute Truth is all there is so there's no you to be anything. What occurred was an appearance that you interpreted as happening to you and you claimed it as an experience of yours. The Absolute can seem to do that. It can seem to look for itself but it will never find it because it's what's doing the looking. It's not really looking anyway as that's also another appearance.

I don't care how much one claims to have awakened, have higher consciousness, know about Reality and the likes, etc, if you're a human being and is operating on that level, you are and will not be any different than the average Joe. There's no you and the average person, there's you and other. There is only having more knowledge or understanding better or more familiar with or maybe a higher IQ or EQ. It's the same as having a bigger house, a more luxurious car, living in a fancier neighborhood, wearing a more expensive watch, fancier clothes, than the average guy. Celebrities, depending on who they are inside, might feel a sense of superiority over their fans or the regular person. They might feel they're better than. Not just celebs but also whites against blacks, rich against poors, pretty VS ugly, all sorts of ways people feel they're better than. It's the same thing with highly spiritual people. Now they're too conscious for the next man and categorize them as average or conversations now seem one-sided because their views and knowledge is far superior to the average thinker and they weigh and measure instead of seeing it as just a conversation to be had, to enjoy, to experience, to possibly learn from or about the other. It's about my need to express myself and you're just too dumb to grasp what I'm saying and because of that, I'm feeling this isn't getting me what I want. I kinda used to be the same way when I first got into spirituality. I used to think people who didn't think like me in this aspect or people who engaged in 'low conscious' ways of thinking or being were not on my level and average. This only lasted for a short while when life put me in check. Life showed me there is no other that's beneath or above. Only different. It showed me that my judgements of them were my own insecurities and that the moment I felt this way is the moment I went backwards in my quest for relative unification - the reason why I find spirituality interesting and meaningful in the first place. LOVE. I'm limited and unconditional love is something I'm not capable of because everything is and I'm just a sublet of that so it's impossible, but I can at least try to represent that as much as I can. Thinking I'm better than or more than or above only sets me back in this way. Life will teach you things if you let it. If one at least try to understand that it's not about us. It's not personal. It's hard because of survival and the egoic structure but we suffer because of it and we're not seeing how it's all about the differences and the similarities. I try to learn everyday, to incorporate unity and love the best I can even though I'm still corrupted and seeking for ways to survive. I've accepted that. I've also accepted that it cannot be any other way. So when I encounter people now, I try to allow them to express themselves, share themselves how they feel the need to or want to or like to and i either share along those levels, if appropriate, if they're listening and allow for a smooth engagement of conversation and see the beauty in that or I cut it short if I feel a sense of irritation because I'm just not resonating, but not on a judgmental level but because I will not resonate with everyone. It could be where they're being disrespectful or maybe too controversial or something on those levels, but not because I feel I'm above them and they're beneath me either intellectually or spiritually. If it's one thing I'm very good at and that's holding a conversation. My line of work gave me a lot of practice here and I'm a very good conversationalist. I know how to keep it balanced and I'm fairly knowledgeable in quite a number of fields even if it's just enough to carry and hold a casual conversation, so there's plenty of room there for me to express and allow for the other's expression. I see in everyone the same thing.....Absolute perfection. The only difference is how I relate to them, respond to them and the way they make me feel. That's the difference in being human and how I see the differences. I will not try or attempt to resonate with everyone like everyone, love everyone, accept everyone....that's asinine, but what I can do is not see them as above or beneath me, not even as equal, but simply just see them as how they've presented themselves and respond accordingly.

Hope they read him his rights.

Ok, so the word seem is the key point here. All depends on whose looking because "seem" implies that. I get your whole point and it is well-taken. I'm not agreeing or disagreeing because I think it's a matter of personal opinion but I do think most people are biased and one-sided when it comes to this issue and are basing their opinions and views only on how they see it and not what's actually the case which is only natural and to be expected. Kind of the same thing where one doesn't care about something they're not aware of that's not personal to them and or are affected personally by. By aware of I mean crushing an ant with your feet while walking or smashing a nuisance fly or running over a turtle - that is not an issue for the person concerned about animals being tortured for food. It's all conditional and depends on. This is why I don't get too involved in the issue because all sorts of reasonings and rationalizations are at play.

@Natasha Tori Maru @ExploringRealityOk, I see. Both have similar views. The morality you speak about comes from a sense of right and wrong, I assume, which also comes from a sense of a higher purpose, which stems from a sense of hierarchy over yourselves which I suspect is God, which I suspect to whom this sense of morality subjugated you into subordinance over it. So, this hierarchy which gave you free will and choice by your admission, can bring upon these animals whatever it chooses, but you as a subordinate under it (morality-based) cannot "will and choose" from this free will given to you to do as it does. In other words, it can use itself to kill animals because it's not personal but you are personally judged and condemned if you do with the free will it has bestowed upon you. Is that right?

Reprogramming The Subconscious: Who would be reprogramming it. This suggests there's a you and there is a subconscious mind that's not you. What is operating this mind. It's programming. How is this programming recognized. Who is it that sees a program that needs to be reprogrammed. You are a person that has a subconscious mind that has been programmed. Now you don't like its programming and want to change it to another program. The subconscious mind's programming - who is it running. Who is it controlling. You? If the subconscious is running you and controlling you, what is it that's causing the need to reprogram your controller. Is it this same subconscious mind. Is the subconscious mind the one that wants to reprogram itself or is it you. If it's the subconscious mind that wants to reprogram itself, this makes no sense. This is like expecting an apple to reprogram itself to turn into an orange. If it's you that wants to reprogram the subconscious, then if it's the one running you, then it's pretty much the subconscious wanting to reprogram itself. If it's neither, then what is it that thinks the subconscious needs reprogramming. If there is a you separate from the subconscious, why do you need it. Just distance yourself from it and do whatever the hell you want. You can't? Why not? You are being run by this mind and need it to function? Then how do you know this subconscious mind isn't playing games with you and fooling you that it needs reprogramming. Which one is it. Is there a separate you from this mind, is this mind separate from you but is controlling you and your actions or is the two inseparable. Either way, none of it makes sense. Not saying it can't be done but that it doesn't make sense. Nothing does in the dream. I will expose it all until there is nothing left.

Every image is it.

Who? - There is no who. What? - It's Nothing and Everything. How? - Unanswerable or as a Concept. Where? - Nowhere and Everywhere.