Lyubov

I don’t really recall these things having such as bad an effect on me. In many ways the SNRI (Effexor) I used to take years ago did help me a lot then and was the best I knew at the time. I eventually saw that it was limiting me and my growth so I got off it. I remember the withdrawal was not pleasant. I remember feeling spacey. Like I felt just weird, loopy, spacey, brain fog. Sort of nauseous too. It felt bad. I think just eating healthy and sleeping a lot helped. If I recall it only lasted like a week so you will be good.

Like many things, in moderation it’s fine, but too much and something in life will then suffer.

Tremendous damage has already been done to our court system and especially the institutions at the top. It’s difficult for me to see our current democracy lasting much longer before it devolves even further.

It’s tricky to define. To me I believe that passion is a feeling we create which is the product of being true to ourselves and aligning with the Tao, there’s a sort of natural unfolding where there is room for us to create. We create desire and passion as forward energy to create more and more. We have preferences and our environment and beliefs shape this some too.

I’m living in Rio de Janeiro now. Maybe you can share me some culture tips with dating Brazilian women? I just got out a 3 year long relationship with a girl from Russia, and I don’t know I find Brazilian women very different from Russian women. I find Russian girls play far less games and really value strong conversation. I almost want to say I think Russian girls are more predictable to me but I’m not sure if that’s from experience or if I just share the same values as them often. Russian girls really value trust and consistency in a man and they really don’t kiss quick at all or give sex quick. If you fuck a Russian girl the first eeek consider yourself on the lucky side. Russian girls also really rope you into be a boyfriend. I find they play far less games. Russian girls are my favorite. Brazilian girls idk I find they play a lot of games. They seem to date around more and do more slutty stuff. I don’t like how they may kiss several guys in one night. They seem to want a guy that is sorta sleazy and tries to kiss them real quickly. They are constantly touching me and I’m not sure if that’s a sign of interest or just culture. Russian girls never touch like that. Brazilian girls seem very fickle and flake. I also find they leave a lot of room for men in their lives to flirt with them, much more than Russians. I don’t like this. Im going to accept Brazilian women for who they are and do my own thing and I definitely want to start dating here but I want to learn about the culture and see if there’s something I’m just not getting about the women here. Maybe I’m just so introvert euro minded after years dating in Russia, it’s a huge culture shock for me in Brazil. I don’t get the women at all.

Yes for sure. I’ve been laid from clubs before but it always seemed like the woman chose me. I have some perhaps limiting beliefs about try to talk to women in clubs I basically believe that the essence of the interaction is too lopsided, like in a casino. As a man you have to talk to a ton of girls. I was at the club last night and lots of guys were coming up to girls and most were not making it far. I don’t find this enjoyable at all. It seems far too much like a silly game and it also seems to me give too much validation and attention to women. I believe the man should be seen as the prize for the woman to genuinely be really horny and want the guy and clubs out a guy in a situation where there is high volume for this but also high volume for a ton of girls that aren’t interested. So it’s sort of a grind and really not fun at all. Add on top of that entrance fees, drinks and how different clubs have different crowds varying in friendliness and exclusivity. It’s not the environment I shine best in. I mean some clubs and bars I do well but not all, many table heavy or more ritzy clubs I don’t really vibe or have the same belief system or values as perhaps the guys doing well in these environments? On the beach, walks, parks, just like more during the day or in a setting away from really loud pop music in a club, I do better in because this sort of dynamic where I put myself in a lower position than the girl is gone. Maybe that’s my issue though about clubs. I put myself in a lower position than the girl purposefully in my mind, when I shouldn’t be and just dance, have fun and start talking to whatever girls are around me on the dance floor.

I don’t really know how to start a conversation with a woman in a loud club setting. It’s easier for me in a setting outside a club. A bar or in the beach is easier. In a loud club where there’s a ton of girls and guys acting bold, I’m just lost. I sort of want to learn and have no limits when and where I interact with women.

Maybe, it could be this too but I see it ultimately as a lie and illusion so it will eventually break. I see a hammer thrown into the talking video screen type situation, like that old apple ad, less dramatic though.

I physically really love sex and to be honest one of my top intentions currently is to explore my sexuality more with more women. I wouldn’t call it overrated but I will say it never completes anyone and we have often times been fed by society and our own false beliefs that having sex completes us and we need it to be happy or joyful or peaceful. I also think there are dimensions to sex and a grass is greener on the other side problem here. When I was having problems in my last relationship I almost lost attraction to an otherwise very pretty young woman. When I had easy access to sex I would only have it maybe once a week and this was on the sort of relationship is coming to an end phase. There was also keeping it interesting in the bedroom and considering her needs, there’s a lot more to sex than just pumping and cumming. So how we perceive sex and what we have can really come into play with how we apply our beliefs to it. I do think there is a really limiting and false belief that we have to be having sex always, however this doesn’t mean suppressing desire. Desire is a great thing, I think it just needs to be created responsibly.

Keep in mind I never said women don’t have physical preferences for their partners, that is a matter of choice. It’s sort of a tricky topic since acknowledging it doesn’t really do anything for anyone, especially men. Notice how black pill will focus on in notion about this and all the guys who aren’t dating and that they see as physically ugly, but then they will simultaneously ignore all the examples that show that disprove their belief. So it’s sort of tricky to approach because any belief where one sort of postulates about “what ifs” (what if I was handsome? What if I was rich?) leads to nowhere. It literally does much of nothing for one’s development. So I don’t dent black pill are observing the differences in people and how everyone has strengths and weaknesses but they ten concoct a false belief and expectations that kills any growth. It’s why I say it’s absolutely a no go to ever compare yourself when dating to anyone else, other men or women. Just drop all comparisons and make the best of your situation.

I believe there is going to be a return to truthfulness and authenticity on these platforms in the next ten years. AI is going to get so good it will cause a lot of confusion and there will be a massive push back to this technology. Face to face interaction will increase and even the content made will be more inclusive and holistic. I’m even seeing it some now. Ive noticed there’s been a big rise in videos made by people working normal jobs and just living a typical life without the influence bullshit laid over. I think we will see more this

I think all of life and its constant unfolding and renewal leads one back to true self. I don’t know if the specific belief systems of society does. I think life/reality can often times not align with society beliefs so in a way both the uncertainty of life and the problems we may face aligning with society can wake us up. So beliefs from society and then reality clashing. I think I’ve learned a lot of lessons in life by realizing how wrong I was to believe many things told by society so in a weird way it does lead some people to truth and peace.

To me the Tao is value, not by labels but by experience, what I’ve found to be true. So I say align with true value because it’s the only value there is at the end of the day. So really a lot of problems being had by anyone at the end of the day is not aligning with true value. I instantly know if a person feels depressed it means they simply aren’t aligned with their true value. Some belief they are choosing is a lie and you can not align with true value if you align/believe a lie. Yet in a mind fucky way that doesn’t even exactly describe it since the true value is always true and it’s impossible for it to never not be so it’s just this like weird little foggy funk illusion people go into. Words are tricky and the only reason we are dialoging here is because the word value is used for different things and we have our own definitions. I think preferences is a better word to differentiate. People have preferences and things they use to build meaning in their life, and it’s largely a matter of choice. Value (with a capital V) is just what is true. It’s the canvas, what one is. Aligning with this value is the way to a balanced and healthy life in flow where all challenges that come along do not throw one off, but it’s of course always normal to manage this dynamic and grow and learn through life

They are all rigid perspective. The “red pill”, which by the way I cringe writing, is in a way the most accurate because it does indeed encompass and account for uncertainty and hardships of dating and many ways women will make their own choices, pursuing what they believe is right for their life and their values. The thing is they then dump in a ton of animosity, blame and just really rigid thinking that is a recipe to a miserable life. Some in this space have built on it with self help stuff on discipline and hustling and whatnot but the original red pill was basically realizing women are their own ever changing person and will make choices that are in their own self interest like every person is doing on this planet. The black pill is just a straight up limiting, false belief that you need to be tall or handsome to whatever to get a girlfriend. It’s just a lie. Really a totally unhelpful belief to hold. Total victim mindset. The blue pill, I’m not even exactly sure what it is. I think its the belief that somehow because you love a woman or she loves you or you both love each other that life is now complete, all problems are gone, the relationship is perfect never needing any upkeep. Basically some false belief that life is on a pair of train tracks and real love will one day show up on your doorstep, happy ever after the end. Basically fantasy bullshit.

I was wrong about how I would spend my time, taking my blessing for granted, thinking life would just take care of me with me doing nothing. I didn’t really have an appreciation for there needing to be appropriate action to take place to keep life moving in a healthy and balanced way. I was wrong for trying to heal my ex and trying to be her therapist and pushing my spirituality and teachings on her, very wrong for this I was wrong for thinking there is a hierarchy of development. Everyone from the homeless guy on the street to some billionaire has something to offer that I can learn from and appreciate. Each integral for the whole. I was wrong for thinking I could get out of being responsible in life, it’s literally impossible. I am responsible for my whole life, and with this comes with being the creator of it as well. I was wrong for ever doubting myself and my true intrinsic value, always here no matter what happens in my life or what mistakes I make. Always whole and valuable. Spirit. This is where I’ve been most wrong in life. doubting myself and aligning with some lie like I’m not good enough or unlovable.

Why do you choose to create negative stories? Own it. You are the master of your mind, it’s not the other way around. You choose your beliefs. They don’t choose you. You are not the victim. You are the creator. Do self inquiry. Why do you choose to tell yourself negative stories? What’s the benefit of doing this? What is unresolved? Start there and work your way through your beliefs and find what is out of alignment.

Examine your beliefs

Thanks for sharing your story. I will share with you what has helped me. I would start with owning this emotion you call guilt. I would invite you to see that you are creating it. You aren’t the victim of it. Where do you believe emotions come from? Do you believe you create your emotions? I’ve found that emotions come from beliefs. So if we are in agreement this emotion is something you are creating, it’s time to look at the beliefs behind it. Why? Why do you choose to create guilt? I think really examining your belief system is the way for you to resolve this. The most important thing is owning it first though. Why do you choose to self sabotage?

It’s interesting to think about. I will share how I see it. first off many people have a natural appreciation for relationships of all kind, friendships, romance, family. These are normal to have, experience, enjoy and benefit from. I think in childhood though we disconnect from something unexplainably great, whole, spirit. We develop and take on all sorts of beliefs formed in our child mind. These beliefs aren’t true but they sort of warp our perception and we forget they are even there. We believe we aren’t whole, we lack value without others, we are unlovable without others. Often times this has happened due to how our parents were and hardships and unfortunate things we faced as kids as well. I do think many people sort of then use romantic partners to then resolve this misalignment rather than going inward and realizing one is whole and true no matter what. I don’t think this necessarily means all Romance and relationships are based on this false chase of value outside oneself. I do believe there are ways to navigate this domain of life with balance and of course to fulfill relationship desires. I also do agree that I think our unique situation in life also affects our relationship. There is an aspect to money, coping with life’s challenges, these do have a dynamic with in many relationships. I see it sort of like an orchestra. There’s many different instruments but if they are all tuned and playing in harmony, beautiful music appears.

I've been wrong a lot of times. So much in fact I changed my relationship to this perception. We learn through mistakes. We internalize being wrong as something that is bad as a child. Usually through criticism we received and then beliefs we formed about ourselves. It's ok to be wrong guys. Admitting I'm wrong has lead to so much growth.

this

from my experience life is an inclusive experience so there is no end to what you call ego as long as the human life story is ongoing, and why would there be? it's what makes you, you. The balance of the higher mind with your humanity. It's not some fault or mistake. Now on psychedelics I have experienced a total shift in perception. I would say the journey entails aligning the ego with the higher mind and enjoying life.

what benefits? is it good for brain fog and focus? I heard good things about qigong

Why do you chose to create overwhelm? Start self inquiry from there. I would drop any limiting beliefs that come up and expectations you have. You know what you love to do which is great. Just do it and know with certainty that if you continue on this it will lead you to higher and higher places. where thoughts go, energy goes. Don’t disturb yourself. Continue to write.

Great job, you seem to really be on the right path