Flyboy

Portal 2 The Witness

Can you elaborate on the heavy metal detox procedure that has worked for you?

@ardacigin I appreciate the advice! As my mindfulness improves and starts to penetrate my daily life more, I am noticing the tension more and more often and reminding myself to let it go. The relaxing often only lasts a minute or two, but I hope with time and habit and increased mindfulness that eventually it will start really making a difference.

How did you "undo" this chronic tension? I'm discovering that I have something very similar to what you describe, and as my meditation practice deepens it is becoming more and more obvious. It's troublesome though because it many ways it feels like an anti-meditation force field; in a sit I can break through it with concentration, but when I sleep, for example, it basically is a pattern of thoughts that is hard-coded to deflect attempts to let go, relax, stay present, or allow peace and acceptance. My sleep has been terrible for a really long time, and I think it causes chronic fatigue during the day. Would love to know more about how you were able to get past this.

@diamondpenguin My response is to take a look at how much you are inside of one perspective. It's easy to have this frame "all stock traders are bloodthirsty animals manipulating markets for cash gains at the expense of the common man." But that is a SUPER stage Green frame. Have you read Ray Dalio's book? If you had, it would be quite clear to you that understanding markets and the "machine" behind how humans interact and make decisions is his passion in life. He truly loves it, in the same way that a mathematician loves his equations. Ray Dalio did what he loves in an uncompromising way, with integrity, innovation, and passionate resolve. He became a billionaire because he was successful, and set a standard which many other financial institutions copied since. Also recognize how little you know about how finance/business really works. Do you have any idea what financial institutions actually do, what benefit they have for markets, or why they are important? Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of things that could be improved in capitalism. But when you demonize an aspect of capitalism out of ignorance, you are not being wise. I have an MBA from Harvard, and I only know enough to know that I don't know very much! But suffice it to say, there is both good and bad in everything. I think Dalio got stuck in early stage Yellow because he never could quite let go of science and the materialist paradigm--but compared to most billionaires and "rich people", he led a pretty good life and did some incredibly admirable things. Not everyone is a visionary like Musk or a grand strategist like Gates. Find your life purpose and pursue it with passion.

Leo's video on patience is pretty applicable here. You are definitely going to experience exponential results with meditation work. While that will be super exciting one day, it also means that for the first X period of time it's going to be very boring and really require commitment. Looking at folks who have done the basic work seriously, 5 years seems doable with hard work... but that means you probably won't see much for the first 3 of those. The challenge of course is distinguishing "no" progress from "slow" progress. Sometimes you may not be able to. But I am personally trying to counteract this potential for "being stuck and not knowing it" by reading up on the paths, the maps, and all of the various techniques that whittle away at the illusion. Keep bringing new tools to bear and taking a holistic multi-faceted approach. If Vipassana isn't going anywhere, try concentration work, or vice versa. Keep redirecting when you get stuck and the different approaches will reinforce each other over time. When you have your legs under you, do some serious 10 day retreats where you go balls to the wall and try to hit stream entry by the end. After stream entry, I think we will start to see the much faster pace of results and deeper levels of meditation that make the whole thing start to feel like it isn't a waste of time! My perception at my current level of knowledge is that self-inquiry is like digging from the opposite end of the "self"--I think it is necessary at some point to get all the way there, but without the huge headstart that Vipassana gives you, I think it is likely to be a frustrating path. I'd save self-inquiry for later (like when you can hit the formless Jhanas and THEN do self-inquiry, as that should prove very effective). EDIT: I should note that I'm talking about achieving a permanent Arahat-level of enlightenment, not getting "glimpses." As helpful as glimpses are (and even psychedelic trips), I personally want to achieve a state that is locked in. The goal of eliminating dualistic suffering and realizing a sort of unconditional happiness doesn't seem to be possible any other way.

No it's a real thing, and mine fills my head with electricity on a regular basis. Don't fuck with it unless you know what you're doing, and even then, I'd advise against it.

I'd also love to see this, as I know Frank Yang has himself watched a lot of Actualized.org during his journey. That said, he (and Ingram, and Ralston) are all in strong disagreement about psychedelic states vs "true" enlightenment, so such a discussion would be very interesting. However, since this is very threatening to the credibility of Leo's work, I very much doubt any such discussion will take place. I personally have gained a ton of insight from Leo and have found psychedelics to be life-changing, so I'm not taking any sides. However, Ingram and Ralston are incredibly respected enlightened dudes, I also value their opinions. Frank is wild, but I think he is genuinely at the arahat level, which is a remarkable achievement.

I struggle with this kind of ultimate "letting go" as well, but yesterday this thought occurred to me: There is no choice. Not really. I'm too far down the Truth trail to go back. There is no saving the ego, no going back to sleep. So what feels like a "choice" isn't really - there's no other direction to go. You may have to get close to it enough times that your sheer frustration, boredom, and familiarity with the fear add up enough to finally allow you to take the step into the chasm... but that is all part of the process. From this meta-view, getting close and getting scared away is just as much part of "getting there" as any other step in the journey. Keep at it! It's only death, and it's going to happen sooner or later anyway May as well go willingly!

Personally, I find this entire scoring system to be totally ridiculous hogwash. You cannot possibly know what someone else has "realized," nor is such a thing even close to quantifiable, as it is ultimately subjective, personal, and impersonal. It just stinks of ego to me, like a spiritual version of armchair quarterbacking. There are better ideas to spend your time on.

I watched Tree of Life this past weekend, and I must say I basically didn't "get it." There was some beautiful imagery clearly indicating the contrast between "God" and what people were praying to as God, but the whole loss / mourning / floofy beach scene at the end made very little sense. Am I missing something?

Movement is actually just an idea, itself. Movement is inherently relative - you can't "move" unless it is relative to someTHING else. So, since "everyTHING" is part of the dream, the very concept of movement only makes sense within the illusion of the dream. Of course, awareness and the "dream" are also concepts from within the dream, so be careful, they aren't "real" either

@tuckerwphotography Yeah, you are definitely correct and I don't mean to glamorize. She very much struggles with feeling "between things" and alone. Listening to her talk, her experience almost seems like one prolonged psychedelic trip. Things come in and out of focus through all the angles that most people aren't even aware exist. She can pause herself "in-plane" for a moment or two but is almost incapable of staying there. My mind is wired much more like the "construct-aware" side of it--I'm extremely good at conceptualizing and framing, and can flexibly see meta-models and deep connections and infinite extrapolations. But it is "square" for me, in a sense. I stay in-plane or cross-plane, but can only vaguely see how she flows between them. I'm curious, how did you find yourself where you are at? Was it intentional development, or were you always that way? She describes it as something she has been since earliest childhood, as if her mind is just wired this way. Her flow is truly remarkable... she describes it even connecting different time periods (like communications with her future or past self, where she remembers both ends of the time link - pretty wild stuff).

I just re-read the EDT white paper, and my take is that "construct aware" fits well with the upper parts of yellow, in that it is continually trying to tie everything together into a master system of systems, a theory of everything. (This is pretty similar to the overall point of Actualized.org, honestly). It's hard to see beyond this unless you have experienced it... and while I am not there yet myself, I have a housemate who is at the "Ego-aware" stage, and it is just a different ballgame. She is in "flow" always. Her entire world is flow. It's a quantum leap. So, that's where I see the distinction between Yellow-ish and Turquoise.

I have a question. It bothers me how Buddhists go around preaching the 3 characteristics as if they are axioms or self-evident: Impermanence, Unsatisfactoriness, and No Self. But let's just talk about impermanence. Debunk this argument: How do you know impermanence is not impermanent? Just like the Achilles heel of radical skepticism, this self-referential knot leaves open the possibility of permanence, or eternalism, doesn't it? Time probably isn't real anyway so I guess this all only makes sense inside of our dualities. But still, an interesting thought.

Thank you It's funny whenever you say someone is projecting, you can almost always flip it. I actually heard something super interesting about that... If you think about it, ANYTHING you've ever "thought" about what "someone else thinks" IS projecting, because all you ever have is your own experience to judge what others are experiencing. It's probably good to keep in mind how utterly rampant and subtle this is for everyone

You're projecting. I'm allowed to have my opinion. I've watched almost all of Leo's content so I have solid context.

That's begging the question, brah. So, I dunno, I get the classic array of answers being offered here. But c'mon, we're all here using language to communicate. I'm well aware of its conceptual dualistic nature and the ultimate ineffability of the absolute vs the relative descriptive power of symbols. But if we just throw that out there every time someone asks a difficult question, why do we even have a forum? I'd like a little more nuanced discussion on this. For example, what are the limits of logic relative to describing our experience? (The argument I made is a logical one, I'm aware). What is the epistemological nature of stating something as an absolute? I don't care at all if someone claims to be a Buddhist master. I do care if they can be self-questioning and willing to probe the deepest angles of their claims about reality. I'm simply pointing out that "impermanence" as a categorical absolute seems overstated to me, as even the word "impermanence" is itself a concept and idea that MUST by definition be less than IT.

My argument is not that there "could be" something permanent one day, but that there could be something permanent NOW. This permanence might be the void, or Nothing, or whatever. But people like Daniel Ingram will sort of argue that there can exist no "God" that is fully aware of itself in the ultimate sense, but rather only the infinite dance. This doesn't quite sit well with me. Of course the concepts are just scaffolding, but the scaffolding helps to bump steer in the right direction towards realization.

I have felt like they've been a little lazier lately. Like low-hanging fruit topics that don't require as much insight or research. But hey, the guy is dealing with some serious health issues and the tension between this work and his own path, so I admire him for pressing on with actualized.org anyway. Still enjoy listening, even if I don't get quite as much profundity these days.

Yup you're definitely correct. Yellow is a bit too nebulous of a bucket to understand this phenomenon well... Read Cook-Greuter's EDT. Yellow is roughly the equivalent of the "construct-aware" phase just prior to being "ego-aware", which is where all the really high velocity spiritual growth starts to happen. Being arrogant and superior and meta-critical as you evolve into rarified territory is all part of the process. Just don't get stuck there. It does help to know that this behavior is NOT characteristic of those more advanced than you, and thus to start catching yourself doing it and deconstructing why, over and over, until it starts to sink in and you move beyond it.

I think Dalio is mostly Yellow. He's definitely materialist, so perhaps not so much on the spiritual lines, but in terms of complexity, nuance, systems thinking, holism etc. he is very Yellow. Great resource. If you are Yellow/Turquoise and want a challenge, read Principles and try to deconstruct his errors

@Consilience I did check it out. I read all kinds of things I disagree with, and never relinquish the authority of my own direct experience, intelligence, and intuition. All I am pointing out is that stuff like the Law of One is highly vulnerable to getting caught up in "belief." It's structurally in the same category as the Bible or the Koran. Can there be wisdom in there? Of course. But deriving authority from the source of the material (woo woo transmission) is really dangerous. Abke talks about the Law of One as if it IS true, incontrovertibly. This is not good, and just encourages more disciples instead of critical thinkers and raising consciousness.

Sorry don't really buy this. The Law of One, despite saying some enlightened sounding stuff, still requires you to BELIEVE in its source and authenticity, which is utterly antithetical to spirituality and consciousness work. I have no way of verifying if it's legit or not So, I don't put much stock in stuff like this or "conversations with god" type books, other than for amusement or speculation.

Sorta. Could have been a lot more than it was though. I know I know it started science fiction, but from a consciousness perspective it was like so close but not quite.