Itsokimok

Member
  • Content count

    63
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Itsokimok

  1. @Nahm Thank you, Nahm for this. I tend to feel high highs and low lows. I would go through periods where life feels like a burden and I even want it get it over and done with but fear that I'll be born again into something worse. Then I would go through an equally long period where I notice big growths and insights and feelings of love, joy and reverence for all of life. I become super inspired. I don't have bipolar, just a fair bit of trauma. Rumi, damn, I always end up crying when I read his stuff. It's so moving
  2. I've been thinking about my values and among them are self-actualization, wisdom, truth, love, beauty, consciousness and spirituality. I feel like wisdom, truth, beauty, consciousness and spirituality are very similar. Especially wisdom/truth and consciousness/spirituality. Beauty seems to be present in all of them. What is the distinction between these things would you say?
  3. @Nahm Yeah, I think that I'm here and that I'm a person. I don't know for sure though. I guess I'd just hate to be here again as another "person" and going through "life" which seems to have circumstances, many of which aren't pleasant. Something seems to be suffering, whether it's a person or not. That something seems to be me and other people also seem to be suffering a lot. If this is not what's actually happening, I'd like to know. I guess I do want an awakening experience to see how things actually are..
  4. @Nahm I seem to have a body and mind. I'm aware. Or something seems aware and is seemingly in this body and mind. I have no idea how this came to be. It's scary to think I'm here and might be here again in another life.
  5. @LessonsSavesLifes Thanks for that, but it looks like my question wasn't clear. I edited
  6. I have 6 questions to ask a life/personal growth coach for my career exploration journey. Would anyone currently working as a coach be willing to spare a few minutes to briefly answer my questions? I can DM them to you and you can just reply back with your answers. To clarify. I'm looking to interview a coach about what it's like to be a coach as a possible career path for myself. Just 6 questions to answer very briefly via DM. I don't want to take up too much of your time. Thank you much in advance.
  7. Abuse is a humiliating, degrading experience that causes shame in survivors. Even if it's obviously not your fault, just the fact that you were violated makes you feel diminished and exposed. I know that very well in my head, but damn, the shame is still there. When I look at articles on how to heal self-blame and shame, it often says, "stop blaming yourself". Well, I know. The question is how??!! If I try to use my mind to do it, it doesn't work because this feeling isn't rational. The shame is living deep in my body/psyche, not just in my head.
  8. So I've been diligent about my daily 1 hour meditation lately, but I have a problem. When I note the thoughts as they come and let them go by not resisting them but not holding on to them, after a while my mind settles and my awareness becomes clearer. That's how you're supposed to meditate right? However, I noticed some thoughts are really good ideas for me to contemplate later on or even just ideas about what to do to improve my life. These ideas are better quality than the ones I come up with when I'm not meditating. But when I write down these ideas as they come while meditating, my mind doesn't ever settle and I'm missing the point of meditation. But when I meditate how I'm supposed to, I'm unhappy about forgetting those thoughts and ideas that I like so much. If I don't write them down, I forget them. Any suggestions?
  9. I'm nowhere near this stage, but I find this intriguing. @Knowledge how would you explain that person showing up next week and telling you how their week went then? Why is there that consistency and sense of continuity and logic? I'm very curious. So far, I feel like all I know of existence is my consciousness. That's the only thing I know for sure. But other people seem very real. I'm afraid of them, I love them, I hate them, I find them interesting... I don't know for sure they exist but I feel as if they exist. I have thoughts and emotions about them and there's this continuity and logic that I asked you about.
  10. Thank you guys! That helps a loooot!! I'm willing to do meditation twice a day.
  11. I'm just getting into the outdoors and really want to go on solitary walks in certain parks, nothing crazy really but there are a few city parks where I live that are very big and quiet. They feel like the wilderness because they're so expansive and you don't hear cars anymore when you go deep enough into them. You can get a good long hike and contemplate in a way that's hard to replicate in the concrete jungle. But these parks are full of coyotes and sometimes off leash, potentially aggressive dogs are running around. When you look online, almost always there are tips against going to big secluded natural spaces alone. But how do you then do the work you can do in solitude?
  12. Thank you for your generous answers of great variety!!
  13. If you're trying to awaken to Truth but have a bunch of childhood trauma, do you have to heal most of that before you even think of pursuing awakening, using psychotherapy? Or if you singlemindedly pursue awakening, you'll be forced to heal the trauma anyway, like there is no way around it? I've been mostly focusing on healing trauma and it's gradually getting better with therapy, but I don't want to run out of time to pursue awakening as that can take years and years! I've heard of nondual psychotherapy, which basically posits that "there is no "self" to be traumatized, there's no "self" to hold grievances against others and so the only way to heal trauma is to observe the painful memories in choiceless awareness. What do you think of this? Sounds like it's spiritual bypassing but also intriguing.
  14. I think it's shocking enough that there are people denying white privilege and saying "All lives matter" and wondering if America is "overreacting" to Floyd's murder on this forum. On this forum out of all forums. Reality is complex indeed.
  15. It can be very trippy. I found it hard to relax and let go at the beginning but once you do, it's great
  16. Thank guys! I like the idea of a spray
  17. Is there such a thing as objective beauty standards? feel guilty because I think being fit and having sharp features looks beautiful. One of my female friends who's an awesome person, I would never be interested in her that way as she's at least 30 lbs overweight and has a rectangular body shape, no curves whatsoever and has no jawline. I feel bad because of the body positivity and fat acceptance movement and people emphasizing that we can find beauty everywhere if we choose to look. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. It just feels like I can't help what I find beautiful and hate to seem like a sexist jerk who helps perpetuate societal beauty standards. But I think of other guys the same too. They look better when they're fit and so do I. I make an effort to be healthy and fit. You know how there are also guys who have more feminine body shapes? I'm sorry to say but I don't think that's attractive. I want to, believe me, because I feel like an underdeveloped person for not being able to find everyone beautiful. Is this a stage orange problem or has nothing do with your spiral stage? Any thoughts or tips?
  18. That helps guys! I felt a bit embarrassed posting this. When I bring this up in real life, people sometimes get offended.
  19. What do I have to do to learn about entrepreneurship if I don't know anything about it? There are courses online. Should I take one of them? How do you go about choosing a course out of all these options?
  20. @Average Investor Thanks man! Yeah, I actually want to do an in depth research about this. It's so new to me. I'm a bit intimidated but hopeful.
  21. Lately I started feeling grossly unsatisfied with my life. Depression is looming over me now knowing that I'm not tapping into my full potential. Only now, at 36, I'm starting to think maybe I have gifts to share if I do more soul searching. Maybe I have a soul song to sing. But fear is nagging me. I hear beliefs in my head saying "You're too old!" "You're going to fail and be in an even worse position that you've been in your whole life." "You're going to embarrass yourself with these foolish thoughts. Stop before anyone finds out you're even thinking about this at your age". These are limiting beliefs. I know I'm not alone in having this kind of beliefs. That's the reason I'm even bothering to post this because maybe it's very common for human beings to have such beliefs and many of us let them stop us from pursuing something more than the 9 to 5 grind. Maybe there is hope because these are beliefs after all. But beliefs are there for a reason. They're not always true for everyone in every situation, but they're protective and are based on at least some truth, no? We pick them up and they do us some good...for some time...I don't know.
  22. @Chakra Lion This is great!!
  23. @Michael569 Thank you. Yes, I'm going to buy the course very soon. Looking forward to it!