Someone here

@Nahm @ivankiss Thanks. Would you give me more practical advice. Like how do I go about getting out of this nihilistic phase. Also how to deal with solipsism specifically. I already decided to stop watching Leo. As his videos are so much loaded with concepts and it actually makes me more confused than ever. Is this the right move?

I had glimpses. But awakening doesn't stick. It is an experience that comes and goes. Not a state of being.

Are you alone in the conventional sense?

Yep I already stopped watching to Leo for a while after noticing that his videos starting to make me feel depressed and solipsistic.

@allislove no I'm not listening to Spira recently. Been listening to Jim Newman recently. I'm thinking of quitting this whole spiritual quest for good. I stopped listening to Leo for the same reason. Imb afraid also that I'm all alone and hallucinating the whole world. I'm terrified of my aloneness as God. Which I had glimpses into many times before.

Im just tired of word games and concepts. I have had depersonalization and used to obsess over those things which made my sense of reality more thickle and slippery. Feeling i have no purpose sucks and ruins your whole life. It is impossible to find the answer yet we are trapped in a constant stream of never ending seeking. Even leo can't stop seeking because he is still in the dream believing he is achieving something serious. what a fuck...

Beautiful

@Adamq8 I'm taking a break from watching Leo. But will check that out. Seems like an interesting video.

For example, does a highly enlightened person feel grief after someone close to them has died? Are they actually uncondtionally happy, or in denial about how they actually feel? Can you still feel grief and stay happy? So the more enlightened the more insanely happy you become lol. It seems incomprehensible that you could stay smiling in such a travesty.

We aren't meant to be happy 24/7 are we?.. Isn't it natural to feel sad when you are supposed to? Like when losing a loved ones. How can you avoid sadness ? To me it seems like an inherent part of reality.

@WaveInTheOcean so enlightened people still feel sad and grief when things do not go their way?

Interesting. There's something to that. ?

Exactly.

No. Things only exist inside of consciousness. A chair is made out of consciousness. A chair without a conscience perceiving it exists as nothing or everything. According to quantum physics.. When it's not perceived it exists as a " possibility function". The process of conscious observation literally creates reality. By collapsing the possibility wave function. But Furthermore.. There is no actuality to the past.. Or the future.. Or anything outside of your direct experience right now. So you are engaging in pointless thought experiments about things that can't be known to you by defintion. Because there is no actuality to any of these things.

They were nothing. Obviously.

This is hilarious

Why people are so fucking arrogant they fly into the sky with their noes?.. Who do we think we are? Why 90 % of people are so fucking arrogant, ignorant and delusional?

Curious what you mean exactly by "Infinity"

The idea of it being hollow - undefined. Being is just "it" - it's not nothing or everything, it just fucking "is"....it's outside of language and everything else.

@WaveInTheOcean love ya too. Perhaps I'm the delusional one. I don't claim to be free from these qualities. There's some truth to that.

@WaveInTheOcean I can tell you are feeling nice. Keep Goin. Good luck

@WaveInTheOcean agreed! Why so passionate recently?

How do you know? So basically everyone acts in an opposite way of his internal original personality (let's call it that). @allislove thanks man. Will check it out. @dflores321 Yeah just felt like getting it off my chest.

isn't it so? Yes or no? the point is why are we so full of ourselves? If we examine our being.. There is so much weakness and blind spots.. So much ignorance.. That I don't get.. . What's the hipe? Alright it's clearly clear that I was triggered from an asshole in uni today... But whatever lol

Myself included. I don't claim to be free from these qualities. The problem is I don't see enough justifications to be that way. I guess.