Someone here

I have made several threads in the past here that I struggle with anxiety and panic attacks. And also about my addiction to smoking cigarettes. Thank god the panic attacks have vanished. They were a feeling of I'm about to lose my mind and my sanity and losing control over my whole body and collapsing .I don't want to get into details in describing what a panic attack is to not trigger other healthy people on here. So..like I said I'm cured now from panic attacks .all thanks to the medication I started taking a few years ago up until today (never missing a single day )..namely: Invega.. prozac.. Rivotril .. Zyprexa . my therapist prescribed them to me .and I'm taking them consistently since 3 years ago. However I still from time to time get anxious . I'm experiencing social anxiety whenever I go outdoors to do a simple task like going to grocery to pick some milk I feel tensed around people. When I go to sleep I feel anxiety and I experience a feeling of difficulty getting up from bed .I wake up at like 7 AM but I slack off and stay in bed doing nothing until 10 AM. It's like I want to keep sleeping for days and not see the light . I feel tired of daily routine .as if I'm 70 years old or something. Another problem I'm facing is OCD . I'm not gonna say what exactly is the OCD about or what is the thing that I'm obsessed about because I think it's embarrassing..but I'm confident to say I have OCD around a certain thing .I keep checking that thing repeatedly and unnecessarily even though my rational mind knows that there is no point in doing so but I can't help but check it out . So I need help with that as well . The final proplem is I stopped smoking for two months now ...no cigarettes..no Cigars ...no nicotine patch ..no vaping etc.. yet I still feel burning sensation in my chest around the lungs and heart area . I know 100% it's the side effects of years of smoking . But like I said I stopped smoking completely for idk maybe two months almost (I don't really count the days ) and I don't plan to ever get back to smoking again. Nobody obviously wants lungs cancer or heart attack . So..yeah ...these are some things I'm going through and I'm looking for advice .if anyone here can help me out please go ahead. Thanks !

Well..I've hesitated a lot before clicking the submit button but "YOLO " right? So there we go .. I'm just a regular porn user who have a quick wank every once in a while. But obviously consuming porn is not just about the quick release but also you don't wanna miss out on endless porn scenes so you do some "research ". So what happened? Nothing much .I just stumbled upon some absolutely insane porn genres. I'm not gonna say what are those obviously but I'm going to say things which are worse than that so brace yourselves. What I've tried to basically prove to myself afterwards is that porn is simply not real . Not in the sense that people are acting or having fake sex..no no no ..but that porn isn't actually a reality. There are no objective porno . I'm going to address two points here: how and why? How :If you quit looking at this stupid thread for a moment and go Google some porn you will quickly come to the conclusion that porn is infinite .literally so.there Is no end to the numbers of clips . There is no end to the sexual genres .you can pretty much find a picture or a video online of someone doing anything sexually related. If not real people then animated or AI-generated. You might think then that explains it... but no. Just open a certain famous porn site and go to the searching bar ...you'd be instructed to "search from 67M" videos . Do you know how to read ? 67 million different clips ? When did they even get the time to record this? Do the math .the internet came around earlier in the 21st century. Desktop Computers weren't even a thing until something like 1990s If I'm not mistaken. Now what's the population of the world today ?8 billion. If one porn site offers 67 million different porn clips then how much porn clips (unrepeated) exist in all the porn sites available? Given that the number of porn sites online is already millions ranging from premium to free to only fans to cam live to god knows what the hell else ? The number is going to surpass 8 billion. But planet earth has only 8 billion and the rest are dead motherfuckers as George Cariln has said . Now please try to convince me this is somehow explainable in a real reality not a matrix reality . Why: why am I posting this topic ? You see I'm making a fool out of myself online just to discover some irrelevant truth that might reveal a glitch in the matrix .which just goes to show you the kind of existential rabbit holes you gotta travel down on if you want yo really grasp what's going on in life and what's up with existence. Contemplate porn instead of jerking off to it .it feels better. My own alternative is I'm..the person typing this ..is dreaming up porn to distract myself from something which I don't know yet what it is .but it seems like I really want to distract myself so much so that I dreamed porn to be endless. Oh wow .

Round and round we go. .this ..is..exactly..what ..I..said..does ..not ..work. If a demon jumped out of your screen and sucked you inside the black holes you keep talking about a lot you will turn into a scared lonely kitten . Then you say "this is just fantasy in your reptile ChatGPT brain whatever lol" I'm saying "if it became actual then all of that flies out the window " Hojo: yeah but... Someone here :no but..

I just want to stay away from society and people. Most people if not all of them are ignorant. Honestly It does feel that expectations from society nowadays are too high. I also find myself exhausted and longing for an extended periods of isolation. camping sounds heavenly to me right now I have also realised that a lot of the times I put a lot of expectations on myself and have realised the only way that I can deal with this is by putting very specific boundaries in place.. including my sleeping times. Quitting society is not always a possibility but if we are able to make time for ourselves somewhere during the week just to read.. sleep or do that fun thing that we have been wanting to do for ages..then I really do believe we can make it through these difficult times.o. ne day at a time. If anyone experienced with van life or living as a drop out have some info.. Please share. Of course the first concerns is how to survive.. Unless you have stable access to food and shelter etc. Not saying I want to be homeless but I just want a cave life . A raw life .something different from zombie land called modern society.

How so ?to me it seems you are saying the opposite.

But this is precisely what I'm saying is not gonna work . Proplems are not gonna be solved by remembering a story to tell yourself . You know the horror movie SAW? That sick old man who has cancer and kidnappes people and do all kinds of sadistic torments to them ? Imagine you are one of those victims and he is trying to Poke a hole in your eyeball with a kit..then let all these spiritual clichés help you a hair . There is just no garuntee in reality .no absolute comfortable bed to rest on it forever. Life is full on man and you never know what kind of bullshit is life preparing for you in the future.

@Hojo hold on here please...say it slowly and carefully and briefly please I'm struggling to understand what you are saying haha .

@Hojo here's the full quote; "I want to let you in on a little secret. There are no problems. There are no problems. There never were any problems, there are no problems today, and there will never be any problems. Problems just mean that the world isn't turning the way you want it to. But in truth, there are no problems. Everything is unfolding as it should. Everything is right. You have to forget about yourself and expand your consciousness until you become the whole universe. The Reality in back of the universe is Pure Awareness. It has no problems. And you are That."

Idk .maybe semen retention does have some benefits. For me it makes me more motivated. When you cum a lot you kinda lose your mojo and zest for life .but also not cumming fora long time makes you obsessed with lust and horny . Besides..you're gonna cum in your sleep anyways.

Gravity is not a "principle " .it is classified as a physical law .Newton grasped it by wondering why the apple falls on the ground or why objects Don't fly to the sky but instead fall back on the ground when you throw them upward.

Equilibrium or homeostasis. An example would be just as you told me to strike balance between acting arrogantly and "free-styling " and writing maturely. You mean how is it applied practically? You can apply it your in your lifestyle. In one word listening to how you feel. Hungry ? Eat .not hungry? Don't eat .sleepy ?sleep .not sleepy ?don't sleep .etc . As simple as that . "Something " implies one thing .I think for something to be balanced it has be two or at least be divisible. Or simply put have two sides .you can balance an object on the table by making the sum total of physical forces applied on the object equal zero. Balance is not not balance. And not balance is not balance.

OK. Well ..I think I will have easy time answering these questions because if you allow them to be as they are they are indeed very simple and answerable. But i know your habit of overcomplicating stuff .are there any nuances or cautions you wanna make before I answer so that I can be aware of while answering?

@UnbornTao hi .so whats the discussion is about exactly ? Give me something I can start with . Thanks !

I'm not wrong about this thread . I proved idealism by mathematically proving that porn isn't real . If I was in Israel I will be winning Nobel prize. 😂 jk. Much love have a nice one. P.S Barcelona has thrashed Madrid this season that Ancelloti needs to be kicked by a nuclear rocket into Brazil. Nevermind.

@UnbornTao Honestly I don't want to talk with anyone on this forum other than Leo. Only him can go as deep as I can .most peeps on this forum are playing games . It's only because this post is written by a random nobody(me). If it was written by Leo all of you will be giving him metaphysical blowjobs and kissing his ass "wow thanks Leo this is profound I never made the connection between pornography and solipsism vs realism "

@Carl-Richard you too suffer from the same issue . If this behaviour continues and this unappreciation of my efforts to tackle and understand the most abysmal aspects of reality which none of you boys even dare to look at yet you so desperately confused about and want to understand..I say if this continues I might leave you guys in the dust wondering about bullshit like "are you even tier 2 bruh ?".

@Sincerity man you need to stop being so jealous of me that i have the balls to post the most fascinating topics on this forum . and another thing is i needed to let this outta my chest .

It's not important.

No idea who's mister girl but what a name ..his parents were sick in their minds more than him and me 😂.

@Sugarcoat I did actually say it .go to page 1 and look into my comments to Schizophonia I hinted at it .

I expected Schizophonia to comment because he read my comment last week about me doing a porn thread from existential perspective and he just said "lol". I'm honestly baffled that leo didn't lock it right away or even deleted it from the database . BTW guys I'm not making any moralizations about porn here .I'm just trying to make sense of "something " which if I actually said it is indeed going to make me banned .

@Leo Gura don't lock this pretty please lol .let it run its course 😂.

It's only gonna get worse from here on 😋

What you are not getting is those "estimations " are pulled straight out from your ass .the actual number of porn clips is infinity. Multiply the number I attached from pornhub by a factor of the number of how much porn platforms exist on the web and you will get a crazy number which cannot be "done " in the time span of less than three decades .I'm talking about since the internet has been around . Keep in my mind that there is also porn movies in the 80s and 70s as DVD.im not even mentioning that.you guys been banging each others by trillions and I'm asleep on my chin like a cuck?

You're gonna die anyways one of those days . Might as well enjoy your time .its really short . Also ..clickbait.