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Thanks to everyone who commented on this thread . I sincerely appreciate it . I'm making some progress. I'm about to hit three weeks smoke-free and I've never been more happy. Now all I want is to keep pushing myself through these first days/initial steps until I can overcome the withdrawal symptoms. Wish me luck ?.

@Holykael Trust me bro.im trying to help you .i was in your shoes once .and I successfully overcome my existential crisis. You are having an existential crisis. There are two main reasons why people tend to have existential crises..and neither has much to do with Existentialism. Deep questions about meaning and existence are important, but we were built to function without having answers to them. Which means when these mysteries truly hinder someone, something is wrong. And the fix isn't answering the unanswerable. Have you ever seen "Annie Hall"? The boy in it is depressed. His mother takes him to the doctor, and the doctor asks him what's wrong. The kid answers, "The Universe is expanding." He then goes on to explain that one day it will expand so much that everything will be pulled apart and destroyed. So, in a Universe like that, what's the point of anything? When I was in my teens and early twenties, I related to the kid's angst about meaninglessness. When I got older an re-watched the movie, I noticed that the kid was living in poverty and his parents were constantly fighting. He wasn't unhappy because the Universe was expanding. He was unhappy because real nuts-and-bolts things in his life were screwed up. He couldn't solve those "trivial" problems so he turned them into something epic--something operatic--in his mind so at least his unsolvable problems wouldn't be hum-drum. It's very similar to how we often cope with real-life problems by watching superhero movies or listening to bombastic music. It elevates our animal problems to mythic status. It's not us; it's the universe. It's cosmic! I love Philosophy, so I don't want to come across as saying, "Your life has no meaning? What a bunch of flapdoodle! Just go get laid!" I take existential problems seriously. However, I'll reiterate that healthy people with met needs have built-in mechanisms to be content without solving these huge, mysterious problems. So, here are some possible reasons why, in my guess, you're worried about these matters at all : You have some very down-to-Earth needs that aren't being met. For most people, these are concerns about safety, intimacy (sex, friendship, love, etc), worries about a sick loved one, financial concerns, social status, safety, and so on. Take a good look at what's going well in your life and what's not going well..in terms of these "banal," everyday issues. You don't get to move on to "the Universe is expanding" (or whatever) until you've eliminate the following. - Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend (or whatever you want in this regard)? - Are you sexually satisfied? - Do you have any health concerns? - Are you at all worried about money? - Are you worried about someone you care about? - Are you worried about being abandoned? Have you been abandoned?

Yes For example..seeing is an appearance. Eyes are a different appearance .The eyes don't see. You have no experience of the eyes seeing anything. They are distinctions happening within consciousness. The visual field is occurring exactly where is it occurring. It is not occurring in your eyes lmao . Or in your so called brain. It is occurring exactly where it is occurring. Just like the 'dream world' at night.. It appears as if the dream character's eyes are seeing the dream world. But actually it's consciousness who is appearing as eyes.. As sight.. As world.

God doesn't exist . You do. And you are completely lost in fantasy land with this whole god/infinity business.

"Vibration"? Yikes! Well, the hotter anything gets, the faster the atoms vibrate. So I'd say .. exercise, sauna, eat spicy food, get fevers . . . etc, get hotter and you increase vibration!? On a serious note though: Personally, tough, I confess I'm not particularly do a lot of techniques, because I naturally find them boring. Even though they're required and do function at some points. I prefer the simple, effortless things. It's a matter of finding, in each one's personal case, what it is that naturally rises your state of being ..and what lowers it. And then, doing more of the first, and less of the latter. Raising vibration is akin to floating in water. You float better and naturally, thus rise, if you relax; if you tense up, you tend to drop, or go down.

How does law of attraction work?

No not necessarily. The characters in your dreams at night depend on your consciousness to be real. Same with this experience you are experiencing right now ..the only thing that gives arise to all these phenomenon (people, objects, colors, sounds etc ) is your own consciousness. I mean it's obvious. Before you were born there was nothing . Things started existing as soon as you started existing . So the relationship between you and others is a co-arising relationship.

your “existence” is the objective thing. others are distorted image ,they are neither real nor unreal, they are whatever you imagine they are ”reality” is what is sensed by human from the existence. If I get the right comprehension, my answer is that it depends on whether your cosmicview is correct or not . If you believe others are real..that's false because you are imagining that .If you believe others are NOT real ..that's also false because you are imagining that . Be open to the possibility that it's whatever you imagine it to be .and not some fixed rigid god-given truth .

@Myself do you want to understand this issue correctly or do you just want to waste some time?

By overthinking about these things, you are creating things that do not exist. This issue of other people existing or not has been bothering me as well.. and I had to bite the bullet and accept that It's my fucking mind that's spinning reality. So whatever I imagine is real becomes real .it's really just that simple . Take a day to imagine that solipsism is true and see how you will relate to others as if they were unconscious robots and how you will feel lonely. Then take another day to Imagine that people are real .and notice how you will relate differently to people. You will start taking them more seriously. Please understand..this has taken me hundreds of hours of extreme contemplating to arrive to these conclusions. And the bottom line is that reality is whatever the fuck you imagine it to be.

I do If you imagine I do Yet at the same time I'm a projection of your own mind . Remember that imagination =reality . So what's real is ultimately what YOU imagine is real.

@Holykael god can't be that simple. You're simplifying it way to much. I mean, it's a nice try, but no cigar. You make it sound like everyone is absolutely fucked. It is to much. Too much. Too much to figure out in a life-time. We're looking at something so smart, a singularity, a mega-mind that goes goes meta on everything, even itself. The human mind cannot ACTUALLY comprehend the truth. The Human mind does not except two opposing things to happen simultaneously (for example, the mind cant compute an object being in a space, and nothing being in that space simultaneously, it is either one or the other) (Another example, your mind cannot compute flipping a coin and it lands on head with tails facing flat on the table, yet tails also facing the ceiling at the same time) The Human mind can only compute linearly, one event after the other. Language can only point to experience. Pinch the palm of your hand, now caress the palm of your hand. Note the contrasting experience. Now try get someone who has never felt either of those experiences to understand what those experiences actually are via words. Impossible. Its like trying to describe colors to a blind person. Its never gonna work. What we need in this work is DIRECT EXPERIENCE. And not conceptualization.

In what why? Do you suffer any illness or disease physically ? Or is it just these wild ideas about infinity that's causing you mental distress?

@Holykael are you sure ? I mean are you fucking 10000% certain that all these "hellish Realms of infinity " are actually real and that you will CERTAINLY experience them in the future? If you are honest with yourself..the answer is no. If your answer is yes ..then please prove it to yourself (before proving it to others ). A big trap in this work is parroting what the teacher said. If I'm being honest..all my ideas about solipsism were borrowed from leo .and I suggest that all your ideas about "infinity " are borrowed from Leo as well.

Please elaborate.

I AM your experience. I only exist within your experience. Close your eyes or go to sleep and I will disappear from your experience.

Lemme ask you this ? Is this "infinity " present in your experience right now ? Like can you touch it ? Taste it? See it ? Smell it ? Or is it just a concept /belief you hold ?

Dude ..are you even conscious of absolute infinity? Or did you just borrow this idea from leo ? Be honest with yourself. If its causing you so much mental suffering.. Then drop it. And pick a hobby or something positive.

Yes .there is no contradiction. What you have to understand is that there is literally no difference between you being the only conscious being or whether others are real . The problem with solipsism is not whether it's objectivey true or not(is it actually the case that I am the only one out there)..but is that it is absolutely true subjectively regardless of that. You are trapped inside your own subjective experience in any case.. So even though I am aware right now from my pov.. From your pov that doesn't matter and there is no such thing.. There is only your awareness.. There is no such thing as "my awareness" in your awareness.. There is only these words in front of you right now and that's the actualilty of what is.. Anything else is just assumptions you add on top of it. .you say "of course there is someone there writing these words.. They couldn't just write themselves lol".. Really?. In your dream.. The entire dream and all the people inside of it..and their actions.. Are nothing but your creation.. They have no Reality of their own outside your imagination.. The only real thing in the dream underneath all the scattered phenomenon is YOU. Its the same with the waking world . We are conscious but only within your consciousness. If you die today the entire world will die with you .

This is where it gets tricky ..because in the dream everything exists within your consciousness and the other characters are not conscious. However in this waking world that you are experiencing right now ..others are conscious BUT still they exist within your consciousness. "People" can simultaneously be dreamt by you and have "their own" subjective experience at the same time .

No .its no different than an input a dream character can give me at a dream at night . It's made of my consciousness. Everything and I mean EVERYTHING exists within your consciousness . Where else could it be? Take a look ?.

Some form of reality must exist. But it is merely information passing into your consciousness. There is nothing clearly objective about it. All you are truly aware of is the information fed to your consciousness and the processing of this information. I do not know if I am talking to other consciousnesses right now. All I know is what I sense. Bottom line is, reality is, at face value, perceived not objective.

@Consept I do choose porn over the real thing .and I have my justifications: Who says I even have a choice ? How many of those who “consume porn” actually have the option of having sex with a real person instead ? Some people may, in fact, prefer porn rather than going to all the trouble of getting into a sexual relationship. Because .. the absolutely “least trouble” one would have to go through in order to have sex with a real person is to co-ordinate schedules and find a place that is mutually acceptable. One might also be required to engage in a long term relationship ( not everyone is turned on by the “zipless fuck” ). There might be an exchange of money required ... if not directly ( prostitution ) then indirectly - paying for movie & a meal. Marriage? No fucking way .I know I'm never going to marry a single person .because I like diversity. And that's one of the reasons why porn wins sex here ..is you can have (although virtual or fake ) sex with endless diversity of women. I guess its just a different experience. I don't know If it's better or worse. Its something I have to experience first in order to make my mind about.

You are projecting the idea that what you are experiencing right now has a deeper independent reality to it. Which you call the external objective world. You Believe the world exists when you are not perceiving it. recognize it’s a more of convoluted belief system that requires extra mind baggage.. that careful.. objective.. direct study of experience and reality does not need. In fact.. if you studied your direct experience long enough you’d notice all sensory perception has no solidity to it at all.. it’s just a fluid.. spacious.. fluctuating field of is-ness popping into and out of a void. the “objective” reality science thinks is out there is quite literally impossible if they knew what they were actually studying, which is perception. The thoughts that think there’s an objective layer are also popping into and out of this void. This requires an extremely stable...mindful concentration of what is really happening vs what your mind thinks is happening. However your consciousness of the present moment is actual. regardless of whether you deny perception/consciousness, it’s here, it’s primary, it’s completely undeniable. Any extra metaphysical claims about the substance of reality are subject to unfalsifiable skepticism. The truth of the matter is that any thought cannot be Absolutely True due to the nature of thoughts existing as functions of time which is of course an illusion constructed by the mind.. the fact that thoughts are symbolic representations of reality (the map is not the territory).. and finally.. the fact that all reason and rationality will always dissolve into an infinite regress of reason where one must eventually concede that they’re taking on a belief. . And again.. It's impossible to prove an objective external world outside of your imagination due to the nature of conscious experience only having the ability to exist as experience. Consciousness is all you have to prove a world. So you are always using consciousness as the actual substance of inquiry and you cannot step outside of consciousness to verify is something outside of consciousness. When you give your back to the world your mind assumes there is a world behind you.. You do this because you need to create reality.. Because If you don't create it.. It doesn't exist. If you stop assuming anything on top of what is "actual".. You would see the only actual thing is nothing. You think the phone that you are holding is actual.. It's not.. There is no phone.. Each moment there is a changing appearance but your mind comes in and create out of this groundless flow an illusion of "object". There are no objects. Each moment you are holding a new phone.

Up.