liamnewsom202

I hear that avocados are supposed to be very healthy. Is there anything to back this up?

@Oliver Saavedra @WaveInTheOcean thanks for your awnsers. do you think there is ever a point where it can become straining to offer support? i feel like this is something i personally struggle with i think based on the way i struggle with my own personal development. i find for me when i feel upset i like to talk myself through it and take a step back and look at the situation. lets say i am upset and feel bad about myself, i try and look at why i feel the way i do and how its okay to feel that way. i observe the self defeating thoughts and realize that i am coming from a place of ego and not of what i truly want in the moment. from there sometimes this will be great especially when i can share it with others. i find this kind of working through and digging into is what works for me. is this not what others want? i think im struggling to understand what exactly others are looking for from me. like i dont know what to say about someone coming to me about how bad reality is. like yeah it sucks you feel so upset that its not the way you want i cant really do anything about that unless i try and do for the person what i try and do myself which they dont seem to really want lol

How do I get better with emotional support in relationships. I feel like when people come to me with strong emotions I will try and help them see a bigger picture in which they can accept the way they feel. I think for a lot of the people ive been tasked with providing support to it doesn’t make them feel better because it feels uncomfterable to not be a victim to your own situation. How can I provide support without activating my introspective personal development side and display my compassion in a way people would understand?

@Zigzag Idiot Thanks man, those quotes are helpful.

I am releasing my first big project which is a music album ive been working on the last year or so. This is basically my first project which i want to use to have a sound out and get to know people within the industry. I have these moments where im really confident about my work and I feel really good about myself and it helps me follow through on taking action on my desire but I will have these crashes where I get anxious and worry that people will judge me and my music and I feel uncomfterable putting myself out there and being vulnerable. Especially putting my voice on the project, while im in the moment making the music I feel great and confident but then like after I feel nervous to show it to people because im worried I am going to seem lame or not worthy. This issue seems to play into other aspects of my life. This summer im looking to try and exhaust my sexual desires before I settle down. For now ive downloaded Tinder in hopes of practicing my game. Sometimes I feel really confident like I know what im doing and I love myself and can be in touch with that inner truth but then people dont give me what I want (I dont get tons of matches, people dont respond) that kind of stuff and it bogs me down. Im aware of the fact that thats part of using tinder and its not wise to take that personally but it makes me feel so small and uncomfterable to just put myself out there exactly the way I am. Im also nervous girls from my high school years will see me and judge me personally lol. How can I work on embodying this higher self image I see for myself? I meditate daily and try to eat healthy and think conciously but this has been in the way for awhile but i know im ready to move on.

@Applegarden @Zigzag Idiot well i just ran into my ex on tinder this morning and i hid my account and deleted the app. It really shook me because it put a hole in this ego identity ive made. Seeing her putting herself out there again and knowing guys are probably swiping on her sucks because it makes me feel jealous and I lose this feeling of being on some pedestool compared to her. Ive had this mindset of trying to work on myself so that I can prove im so strong on my own but its all bullshit and this has basically made it clear that theres no need to care about what she thinks because she has nothing to do with me anymore. I think i need to focus on my music and work for now because im back feeling like im worried i will never get out of my house or meet people and am questioning my goals unless i have my needs met and validated by others which dont exist because i am just stuck in my fucking house all day lmao. Im thinking now I should focus on being in new places in terms of my work and passion and having more opportunities to meet people instead of navigating through tinder and taking my feelings of inadequacy head on right now with no real success. Basically this journey is tough. I feel so lonely and like i will never connect with people again and that I will just be stuck living my parents but its all about perseverance. I forget all about this when im in the moment and focused on my music. It seems I keep getting these flashes where I see her face on the screen again and it sends me into all kinds of shitty thinking about it.

@Zigzag Idiot So basically what your saying is to try and put myself in positions intentionally where people are gunna give me negative attention and think im an asshole and the practice is to try and focus on just being cool with it and not taking it personally?

Does anyone have some good names or youtube channels of people who talk about relationships from a higher consciousness perspective?

When it comes to dealing with negative feelings and accepting your feelings how does communication in relationships play into this? I feel like I have struggled in the past to help others when they feel strong negative emotions because of the way I deal with my own problems. Lets say I feel upset because I feel like my art is not good enough and I get extremely hard on myself. When it comes to talking it out to someone what I would do is take a step back and really look at the situation - I understand that I am feeling angry and frustrated right now - I see that there still is a higher self and observer within me which recognizes these feelings and observes the thoughts of "this isnt good enough" "this sucks" An example of a past dysfunctional relationship I had I had a partner who was really upset that school was off due to corona and was upset she would have to be inside and wanted to feel her feelings by saying how bad it is and basically thinking about how unfavorable and that life should not be this way and if life was not this way I would be happy. I felt frustrated with this after some time because it felt toxic. It was like I get you feel this way but do you not see how thinking in this way and identifying with these thoughts keeps you stuck there? Her response was always that I was not allowing her to feel the way she felt when in reality I never said she couldn't feel that way or that the situation didn't suck for her. She would always just interpret it that I was saying that she shouldn't feel that way and that she wasn't good enough. My understanding is that I would hear them out and hear the way they are thinking and hear the thoughts they are having. From there I would suggest more positive true thoughts to offer consolidation for example like in my exs case: Yes it does suck that you feel that way. Instead of thinking about how bad it is you can look at the situation and see all the other things you could be doing with your time while at home away from school. I get this is hard to keep in mind but it is all a matter of how you look at it. My question is: do you feel like in relationships it is crucial to proper communication to be able to maintain positive thinking/mindfulness regardless of the emotion being felt? Is it unfair and damaging to be identifying with negative thoughts on your partner without being able to take a step back? I feel like I have a good handle on this but I still have left over scarring from this past relationship and want to trust my own intuition on what went wrong here I just feel deeply inadequate because I really gave my all to love this person but I couldn't deny the way it made me feel having to deal with such negative feelings without her being able to step back. She accused me of being emotional unavailable and that in the moment she wants to "feel bad and not have to step back" I think as this problem kept going on it caused me to get more cold and unavailable but it was never the intention. It felt very much like I wanted to help but just couldn't get through without hurting myself. Was I acting emotionally unavailable by expecting this?

@Moon It was more of she didnt really get mindfulness and wasn't into consciousness work. The idea of her not being her thoughts she didn't get. It was tricky for me because it was when i was first having awakening experiences I wanted to teach her out of love but didnt really realize at the time that people dont get it by you teaching them and that it comes from inside. This mixed with her being an anxious person really didnt help and our relationship got pretty toxic by the end. I think I couldve been more patient with her feelings and realized that she wasnt really able to always take that step back into awareness. But the relationship really wasnt for either of us and she was never really accepting of consciousness work and it always freaked her out

When looking for a new partner how important is it to find someone else who is into consciousness work or who has had mystical experiences or is at least open to it? I feel like truly there is no need to have a partner 100% be the same as the way you are and even if they dont understand higher consciousness ideas as long as there is love and appreciation regardless of differences it is healthy. It seems in most cases though people tense up when there are differences and usually people dont like to accept things that might go against the self they are trying to preserve. I feel like id be perfectly fine with someone who isnt into consciousness work but could still appreciate the way I like to look at the bigger picture of reality and I wouldn't have to limit my interest in in order to not offend or appeal to this person. Has anyone had any success in this relationship dynamic? What are your thoughts on this concept

@Chakra Lion @Hello from Russia some conflicting ideas here. i think both ideas are valuable though. i defiantely see how putting people into boxes and thinking too much can take away from the experience but also being with someone who will be turned away once they realize the kind of work and thoughts you subscribe to is another thing to keep in mind. i dont remember the video but theres some ekhart tole talk where he talks about love and relationships and he says something similar to dont think and just be, allow the love to happen

do you think its to be avoided to want to limit yourself to people persuing higher consciousness? is it too limiting or is it just as fair as being open to anyone who shares similar open minded values

@Preety_India yeah i definitely get what you mean. im super happy to hear you found someone you can share such a authentic connection with thats honestly super valuable. theres a part of me which really has a desire for someone who i can share all my insights with and be authentic with and learn from. im just worried im holding myself back by limiting myself to only people who are into this kind of work. other than meditation retreats where would you recommend looking to meet people who might be more committed to real self love and consciousness work?

At this point in my life im done high school (im in my last year and its all locked down now due to covid) most of my friends have been strong orange with a bit of green in my one stoner friend lol. I have integrated orange tons in my life and it has led me towards being an artist and believing in myself and being independent. I feel like i need to embrace the feminine aspects and really allow myself to open up with the next stage. I feel like the connections i am looking for with people i no longer can get with my current friends. Dont get me wrong i still appreciate them and want to stay friends with them it just feels hollow sometimes when its all just jokes and guy talk. Anyways, where are some places i can look around to meet new people who would be more green? What are some things i should keep in mind so i dont deter this value system and can properly integrate it?

Man i went through the ringer just last month with my first break up. It was for similar reasons too. I wish you all the best and unlimited love. I find that the best thing for me was to for sure feel everything that there is to be felt but also be careful about never ending thought patterns. I got tons of feelings of shame and self hatred and blaming myself when in reality relationships are messy things especially firsts. Mirror work helps alot. If you can go up to a mirror and recognize that there will be tons more people and tons more places to go and things to do that did wonders for me. Its just hard to always be in a clear mental like that and see truth.

ive been thinking about it and it wasnt that i denyed her love entirely i just developed very avoidant and struggled with it but was trying to "fight" it or make sense of why i felt uninterested and uncaring. I knew deep down that she relied on me and i felt at times more independant like i can handle this myself which i think she struggled with and needed me to be there for her which is entirely fair i just wanted to make it clear to her for her to get help she needs to understand how through not loving herself and seeing she doesnt need me i can recover from my avoidance by giving you love and accepted that i want to show you love and support without getting anxious. I was not secure so i relied on her understanding that or else it just made me feel like i was not understood. If i was more secure i could have accepted that she was that way and gave her love without getting anxious or insecure. I acted out and didnt always understand the bigger picture so it makes sense why we had to cut ties. I wish her all the best and i look to heal and really focus on appreciating my family and working on truly loving myself so that i can not make people hurt again. A part of me is constantly worried and frantic that she feels the way she does but all i know is that i tried my best all i can do is accept the consequences for my actions and cut ties and understand what happened and move on

Ive looked into different types of attachment styles and how they effect relationships. I have realized that i struggled with an avoidant attachment style in my last relationship. I feel really upset now as I knew there were issues back in the relationship its just all hitting me now that my partners need for love and affection was not a sign of co dependancy but of the way relationships actualyl work and my rejection of this is what fed the issue. I have been unrelentlessly worrying and stressing about the logistics of everything. At what point does co dependancy start and at what point are you being a loving caring partner? How do I accept this within myself and come to peace with this past relationship? I felt like her anxious tendancies were a result of childhood divorce issues and that my inability to be loving to her was a result of her clinging and needing validation. I realize now that relationships require validation and support im just stuck on where lines are drawn. Sorry if this post is all over the place im still shooken up and might seem a little confused and frantic.

@intotheblack is it kind of like the anxious relies on the other and unaccepts them self and the dependant is more reliant on itself instead of allowing love. When the anxious doesnt recognize there dependance with somewone who is securely attached how do they deal with the situation? Does it involve cutting ties or mutual acceptance or does it just turn the secure attachment into avoidant

thanks you for all your replies. i have felt a bit better this week mainly just being more adjusted to the situation and less in the initial shock. Its really easy to get carried away in feelings and either feeling shame or guilt about things but then it had a phase where it turned into anger. That anger as unconcious as it is it felt nice to finally regain my self and no longer feel like this overwhelming self pity and have this urge to want to yell obscenities and poke projected holes on my ex. Ive worked on using this energy in my art and making the best of it.

Last saturday I broke up with my first girl friend of a few months over a year. I learned many things from her but as our relationship went on I found the way I grew was the opposite of where she did. The way awakenings usually happen can be pretty ugly so it led to alot of misunderstanding and communication issues between the two of us. We both became quite unhappy and anxious around each other mainly because the way we show and accept love is quite different. The kinds of thoughts and ideas that I found my self leaning towards seemed cold and emotionless to her and I found I was constantly battling with my own truth and what made sense to her. Resentment grew until we reached total emotional unavailability. We decided to break up and it hit me like a train. The feelings of frusteration and feelings of wishing we wernt together completely faded and I fell right into co dependency and watched as I called her back hours later at mercy to my own ego. It felt like I was trying to cling back and was in utter shock of the ramifications of this but when we talked again it became clear that the more we talked and tried to negotiate we just became frustrated and threw in the towel. Peace was found and there were no hard feelings we wished each other off well and made sure that we were doing the right thing. This helped and gave me closure and I felt in control. Ive been focusing on staying close to truth and trying to allow all my feelings but it truly does come in waves. I feel like il be focused on my music work then the memories will all come back. Sometimes I feel like I know im upset and lonely but it distracts me from my work. I dont want to try and numb my feelings with distractions like work or video games but I find it hard to concentrate and I get overloaded with all kinds of thoughts and creativity doesn't really want to come. The sheer potential for this has inspired me at times and brought me peace knowing I no longer need to explain myself to anyone and I can work on really finding comfort in solitude but I just feel like I dont want to lose track of my emotions and try and hide behind these deeper insights. What do you guys make of my situation. How do you balance work with needing time to feel emotions and when meditating how can I get these emotions to the surface instead of just ignoring them. Is staying present and grounded through the emotions without distraction technically meditation? Is meditation itself a distraction? Ha as you can tell I still have lots to learn and am in the phase of having to really dig now that shes gone but im just looking for any advice or anything that jumps out to you guys. Thanks

My parents are much more relaxed in comparison to what lots of people go through. I think a good take away is that people really do love at their level of conciousness. Its really easy to see the faults and everything wrong about the people we love and have trusted since a child. Its pretty shocking when your first starting to wake up and you realize that your parents would think your crazy. Can lead to alot of destruction. I think what would really help is if you show your mom as much love as you can and understand where she is coming from but try not to judge it as hard as that is. Really try and center yourself in what you preach and appreciate and love where she is at and use that to learn about the nature of human psychology. Maybe the time when she wants you to pray try and meditate through it and use it for time for being mindful. Its great to follow role models like all the guys you mentioned, its hard when you see your parents as these beacons of nothing but the truth and its shattering when you see through all the illusion but it was bound to happen. Take it easy and know that once your through this you will grow tons and try and really find truth and see the positive aspects to this situation

i have been dating my first love for over a year now and as i grew more and more into deeper insights through things like psychedelics and art her materialistic view definitely clashed with me trying to help her and wake her up. this helped a bit in the fact that she has a bit more of an understanding but as leo talks about in his videos she cant seem to get past scientific explanations and ism's. i sometimes get caught up in blaming her for all of her own ego issues as i project my own shadow work onto her and i feel like the fact that she sometimes isnt always concious and avoids hard truths about her actions and cant see the bigger picture sometimes and will get anxious about the fact that life is a challenge and that there is work to be done in order to combat our constant need for comfort. this has definately created some void in our relationship and has made me lose attraction for her but in a way which can be tricky for me to explain to her out of my own fear of her not being able to accept my shadow as i wouldnt imagine myself a few years ago before i worked on these kinds of practices of self actualization of accepting. a part of me has fantasized about moving on and alot of the time it is in pursuit of strong orange value systems such as persuing sex and flaunting my new found self confidnece as a way of validation. this i understand is just an egoic illusion and not truthful but theres a part of me which wonders how i should go about handling this because i definately do love her and she is by no means boring or completely societally brainwashed. in fact it appears she has many strong green values except for the awakening to something beyond materialism which is kind of the center of the frusteration and us not always seeing eye to eye. should I as a self actualizer learn to accept this and continue to love her unconditionally and give up trying to help awaken her? is there ways of striving for her to understand this without arguement and ego backlash from her? what do you guys make of this situation.

as a aspiring yellow thinker (in terms of spiral dynamics) i find that my thoughts become more insights and come to me and i see them from a perspective from beyond just a self but how do you manage letting go of thoughts in general including these systems thinking higher kind of intuitional thoughts? it seems that yellow is constantly obsessed with new ideas in the sense that sometimes it forgets to actualize intuition into reality but is there a point where yellow forgets to step outside thought and will develop egoic manifestations that arnt properly dealt with based on yellows attitude towards constantly relying on thinking and viewing multiple angles. sometimes i find that the quality of my thoughts are self indulgent and can be orange in nature but where do you bridge the gap between yellows integration of oranges thinking and just orange thinking. i am still new to spiral dynamics and actual actualization practices but i feel that expressing my thoughts here could lead me to a deeper insight and more truth based selfless understanding

yea i think being mindful of what you are doing and seeing the relevance in all things is a great idea. even the time you spend fucking around on instagram theres no reason why you cant do that until it becomes harmful. by being mindful of the implications of certain activities you can properly budget without oppressing your feelings or parts of life itself. understanding you cant just "work" 24 / 7 or even refering to your creative passions in 3d animation as work i find personally it distracts me and creates an ego backlash and creates less inspired and more dogmatic work which doesnt come from a true expression of creativity and more from a sense of not being present in the beauty of what you are actually doing and being satisfied with it.