wordsforliving

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Everything posted by wordsforliving

  1. @Humanoid There are traps. Be careful! Did you know that doctors are a prized prey of the feds? The aim and success of the feds is through a certain set of essentially made up criminal charges which can completely and permanently wipe out a physician financially and can lock him up in prison while the prosecutors get huge 6-figure bonuses when successfully sending a physician to prison for prescribing certain kinds of medications. How do I know? I used to work on the inside of the prosecutorial machine and know how it works unfortunately.
  2. That's what I learned from seeing the example of this man who didn't change for the better. He was as messed up as it gets and that's all the brought to the table. So before I discovered Actualized.org and @Leo Gura, I believed anyone who got into psychedelics were just drug tripping escapist misfits. Then when I examined Leo's experiences, my mind was opened to realize that previously I was only seeing one angle of the non-developed misfit. It's like being a bloodhound. Once I catch a whiff of the possibility of some deeper truth in the air, I start going down the trail following the scent. In the case of the guy who had 100s of LSD trips through the course of his life, the end of the trail was just his dead lifeless carcass. Nothing more to see.
  3. @Dutch guy Jon and Missy Butcher have created CATEGORY 13. They are embodying it. They have broke the code of human thinking and restrictions and low consciousness in this area. And what they know could change the world if just everyone would learn and tap into it. I for one really miss it, having tasted it and loved it but an unconscious man choose porn addiction, alcohol and unconscious living. porn had rewired his brain to reject a female in person and opt for the porn addiction. A shame because there is a whole universe in sexuality that is being missed.
  4. Right! I had to quit considering it because it would just torture me to ponder it. I participated in Orgasmic Meditation in NYC and learned that female sexual energy is exceptionally powerful. Yes it is. It's a shame that he masculine is lagging behind in awareness of their energy in a spiritual realm.
  5. My experience is although I might have been "horny" when I was a much younger female, my experiences with men caused me to hate it and have no desire for it. Because the vast majority of men do not give women what they actually want or wired for. This is especially true if the female is very deep or highly spiritual which is how I was oriented. This whole thing of men jumping onto a woman and quickly getting off for their own pleasure and then quickly moving onto TV or whatever has ZERO appeal to a spiritual woman or a woman of any depth. This quick dumping their load into a female or non-spiritual sex will only work for younger shallower girls. For a female who is wired to be incredibly deep or spiritual, this will not work for long. A female wired this spiritual or deep way will just get bored and lose interest in sex altogether. And possibly become asexual, which is what happened to me. Then a few years ago in my now much older years of life I had this mind-boggling experience where I met a man who somehow unleashed the spiritual sexual goddess inside of me. And when the goddess came out of me, it defied belief or explanation, especially when I was a number years post total hysterectomy with nothing to operate on. It was like my physical feats were supernatural for a much older woman. Suddenly, I wanted THIS man - everything he could give me sexually, completely open to everything. He could have sex with me anytime he wanted for as much as he wanted at the drop of a dime and my answer was always yes. We had 6 hour sex sessions, more commonly 3. He did not have to work to make me squirt. I SATURATED him easily. This defies completely what is the physical ability of an older woman. Another realm altogether. I took this man to paradise many times. I was divine feminine embodied. He gasped at the glory of it, saying I was every man's dream. But my story does not have a happy ending. He was totally unconscious and unspiritual and engaged in severe verbal and emotional abuse towards me. That will stop any self-respecting woman from wanting sex with such a "man". And the story ended with my return to asexuality or no sexuality. One might wonder - why would I be drawn to such an unconscious man. Well it defied human explanation, but there were so many memories of past lives with this man. Karmic connection, but I also came to believe he was my "twin flame". I have since abandoned belief in twin flames. There were definitely spiritual dynamics taking place that defied any explanation. All the human rules may apply UNTIL you encounter a woman who embodies the divine feminine. Then it's another animal altogether and all bets are off, as she will be incredibly open to octave realms of exploration into sexuality. A non spiritual or unawakened man would not be able to handle it. I bet @Leo Gura could handle one of these feminine spiritual forces of nature that defies all human understanding, but it would be a rare man to even recognize, much less appreciate it. Unfortunately. Meanwhile the human level and games of sexuality goes on and on. There is SO MUCH MORE that can be awakened to in this area that knows no bounds. So, the answer to the questions is yes. Unless you are dealing with a girl that is more awakened to divinity in sexuality and templated for sacred sexuality, and then you would be dealing with a girl that will be insatiable beyond belief. After my experience, I researched and discovered a couple that embodied what it is like to be matched in their divinity in sexuality or sacred sexuality. This couple is Jon and Missy Butcher. I can only hope to meet my match next lifetime because this is something that is a shame to be wasted. Regardless, now I just place my focus on personal development and awakening.
  6. @Leo Gura I think people have to have spiritual ears to hear and eyes to see some of these things which a lot of people don't have in place. That's why you get a lot of human resistance - there's a lack of ears to hear the essence of a lot of which you speak. Would it take at least 100 trips of 5-MeO-DMT for every person conducting this experiment to achieve the awareness you achieved?
  7. @Leo Gura I've been wondering about this. I know a man who did hundreds of trips on LSD (he's 64 now) and nothing close to awakening or enlightenment happened. In fact this man is extremely low consciousness, hooked on alcohol and porn and does not believe in any spirituality whatsoever. So the drug did not override his low consciousness and enable him to realize enlightenment. As he stays hooked on porn, alcohol, rage and hatred, it's like he's devolving into a chimpanzee. So, there's got to be something to how you use it or what you bring to the table.
  8. @Nak Khid Your agenda peaks through on this forum, but may appear too subtle for many to catch onto unfortunately. Everyone has the ability to discern and think for themselves. It's not up to you to steer people clear of someone (Leo) or something you think is wrong or should be warned against. A lot of people do have bias against drugs or psychedelics. But we are here trying to serve our intuition without having to sift through bias agendas.
  9. @Alfonsoo My mother was exceptionally abusive and I joined the military to get away from her. I would try to avoid interaction with her as much as possible. I can imagine that is nearly impossible, especially these days, but I would try to be out of sight and out of mind as much as possible if there were a way to do it. Build up mental strength by watching Leo's videos. If she has narcissistic traits, I would try to go "gray rock" and be as emotionless or nonreactive as possible. Easier said than done I know, but that would be my objective if I were back at that place where I was again living with my abusive mother.
  10. I recently came out of an extraordinarily abusive relationship. Now, I am in the process of tearing down all my old beliefs and faulty foundation and starting to rebuild from scratch. So as I sort through things, my former partner was a very wealthy man who scammed the NYC Medicaid system. Meaning, he got benefits when he did not actually qualify. This man used me to move to a new location and start a new life and then threw me straight into the trash as soon as he got his new home and new business going (he thinks it will make him more wealthy). The man (63 yrs old) is a narcissist and alcoholic and stays in a state of exceptionally low consciousness, always wanting to fight. I was his verbal and emotional punching bag, but would always say -- well I didn't "hit" you (shoving didn't count in his mind). After this man nearly destroyed my life and I ended up in recovery from PTSD due to his severe abuse, I am thinking he at least should not just get away with defrauding the NYC Medicaid system and I am tempted to turn him in so he can bleed out lot of money that he worships into legal fees to defend himself. Most people give me the advice to just "Let it go". But I am uncertain because 1) I want him to pay for what he has done to me (just being honest); and 2) this type of fraud keeps benefits out of the hands of poor people who actually need it. I asked him to give me a dresser from the house we were living in, as I do not have money of my own right now, but he did not want me to have it. This is a man who has at least 1.6 million in his accounts, with another 2+ million coming in 3 years from the sale of his upper Manhattan apartment. This is a man who only wanted to scream and fight and gaslight the woman in his life. Yet all the while getting benefits from the New York City Medicaid system, PLUS free attorneys from the state due to his "qualifications" for medicaid defending his DWI case. It does not set right. Not sure if I am wrangling with a question of morality or what. Ultimately I do have to let all the harm he did go, I do realize this, but not sure what to do as far as the things he gets away with.
  11. Happy Birthday! Discovering you and Actualized.org truely has changed my life!
  12. @ZZZZ I was curious about the Sedona Method but never investigated further. What about meditation or breathwork? Alternate nostril breathing helps temporarily. I go walking every day and that works really well.
  13. I think taking a break is part of the progress. Gives you space to integrate and recharge.
  14. @28 cm unbuffed I did do the Ho'oponopono meditation practice for a while, then got to the point that I wanted to do something ceremonial or meaningful to close that chapter and not think about it anymore. Realizing this is a temporary phase of this particular journey, I think I just want to learn from it and be done with it. I'll keep working on myself and just like you said, thanks to him I will be in a much better place. Sounds like you've been through the grind too.
  15. Well, through your condensending tone, that one thing I know for 100% certain is that absolutely nothing you say here is of any value whatsoever. You know nothing about my journey, have no grounds to judge me or anyone else as being easily influenced, a sheep, or assume I do not qualify in your mind to do advanced work. Obviously you are not as experienced as your ego assumes. Stop being condensending. Zero value there. Why even be here?
  16. I watched the video as soon as it was released and ever since then I have been in a tailspin. Crying almost nonstop, plunging into some sort of dark night of the soul. The depth of the video hit me to my core. One could easily judge my response as losing my damn mind. God's love. That's what it is that broke me wide open. I know that is exactly what I have been longing for all of my miserable long life. Got some definite tastes of it, but was never able to maintain it. Some things that have been tormenting me ever sense: It sounds like the only way to get to God's Love that Leo experienced (which is exactly what I want more than anything) is through 5-MeO-DMT, which I don't have the slightest clue how to even begin to do. Does that mean I am locked out and doomed to go in circles the rest of my life? Why are people so elusive about helping others go down this path that are clueless about it such as myself? Too old now and don't have decades to waste (tired of it) nor want to waste efforts taking some long route. Have already wasted over 5 decades going in circles. Want to maximize THIS lifetime. Vivid memories returning of God states with the love of my life (we literally saw each other as God for weeks at a time during love making) that were lost (He ultimately choose numerous addictions over the Love). So much foundational work needs to be done here. Need to attain higher levels of consciousness. Meanwhile, the question that plagues me is HOW to attain much deeper or higher levels of awakenings that Leo experienced. Because THAT is the holy grail. God's Love is the holy grail. I KNOW this. Meanwhile, my heart is split wide open in a broken state. What am I supposed to do with this?
  17. Maybe It's intense desire for that depth of Love and realizing, oh shit I have so far to go to get to that state of awareness that I for one so desperately want to that degree. Human love and attachments just don't cut it.
  18. Please be assured, this is temporary state. Try meditating or getting out and moving, like taking a walk. Minister to yourself with self-compassion.
  19. Ok, what if you could view it as just a way of expressing Love for God. A way to say "I Love you". All the particles of God want to have that awareness of no "others" and Love. I admit probably selfish about it. Just tired of seeing great spiritual teachers go away, get distracted or focus on making as much money as possible. More value is here than I've seen elsewhere.
  20. Yes, I have investigated them and I would say that although it is higher conscious than a lot of things that can be found, there seems to be a drive in the organization to earn as much money as possible. Very money driven. At least that's the perspective from some former Mindvalley employees and students. Courses seem too expensive so personally, I search for alternative routes.
  21. Yes, we (as God) are here to let @Leo Gura know that God Loves him MORE!
  22. I see what you're saying. You have time on your side. Things seem overwhelming right now, but you are at a crossroads to construct your own path. The truth is that your life has huge potential. The discouraging things you are thinking just aren't truth - it's how you're feeling right now.
  23. Is God stupid? Then you're not stupid. This will pass. I would say you're just tired.
  24. Your work is the most meaningful I've found, the most helpful I've found. And I've been a serious spiritual seeker for decades. Authentic guidance is needed for for an upgrade in human consciousness. For God's sake, please don't underestimate the value of what you bring to this planet and and in assisting in upgrading human consciousness. If you stopped teaching, it would be a great unfortunate tragedy and loss. My words here are inadequate, but from my own limited perspective, I've been seeking for decades and don't have the luxury of wasting energy and efforts in continuous exploration without getting the correct results. On a side note, I've been a serious adapt in the Bentinho Massaro camp and saw him get sidetracked and become less effective. There is too much unconsciousness on this planet, which is a serious drag on those who really want to actualize, develop and awaken.
  25. This sounds like viable ways to investigate! Thank you for the insight!