kyle barnett

Why become Hokage when you can become King of the pirates like me !!

What do you guys think. Actualized.org has some pretty big goals to strive for such as life purpose, enlightenment and the new becoming a sage. BUt what peaked my interest is what would it be like to strive to grow to "Turquoise" on Clare Graves model. This inspired me because it seems like an important accomplishment of living. I wonder what the life of a turquoise person lives? Or even Yellow for that matter

Hey dude. I am in the same position as you. It is totally normal. You are not nuerotic or have any problem. Remember, you cannot stop thoughts. You can only get caught up in them or let them come and go. If you are constantly getting caught up in them. You are a big day dreamer like me. I love day dreaming but if you are dwelling on negative thoughts then you need to start adjusting your perspectives on life. Its okay to think excessively about movies and stuff and have lots of silly thoughts. Its okay to have negative thoughts or even any thoughts no matter what. The thoughts you have do not matter. However the thoughts you cling to do. I read a buddhist book by ajahn sumedho who spoke of a man saying he thought he was a bad person and should hang his robes up because his thinking was wrong. But it's not. You can't control the thoughts. They just appear. Your thoughts are creations of your ego and if you change your perceptions. Your thoughts change to. Now if it is a problem because you can't focus. That's different. Mediation will help you step out of the excessive thinking helping you focus more. But it will not get rid of the thoughts.

Uhh... First tip Delete all the unnecessary people on your friends list or just create a new one and have close people. Second Join pages and groups that have positive stuff to look at like reminders and stuff. like some self help coaches such as infinite waters posts a lot. This is if you want to keep facebook. But yeah otherwise you can just keep messenger on your phone.

I used to be a gamer, stopped because i also thought it was a distraction. However for me I needed some way to plug in after a long day, or for a holiday, now I am a gamer again. video games can be a huge distraction but in my opinion, they are way better than t.v. and social media.

I get what your saying. However sympathy does not wake you up. Yes he does give a harsh judgement to anger but if you take offense to his perspective upon anger then there is work on your part to fix. We all experience tough times in our lives and things that make our blood boil, but most of these videos aren't for making you feel better, of course when you are in these rough patches it is wise to talk it out and be sympathized but as you go along this journey although you may have empathy for aggression in people you'l also see the futility and lack of awareness within the person. Leo has expressed his thoughts on the issue and stated "his" solution and perspective. It's up to you to consider what he has said and if you don't agree and find a way that works better for you then great. Now for me I personally thought that video was amazing, especially due to his hard nosed approach. That video really helped me a lot too. It made me see that the tough circumstances I was in weren't that tough and that coming at it from anger did nothing but validate my victim behavior. Sometimes we need a good slap in the face, but maybe like you were saying, that approach may not work for everyone as we are all in different stages. It's good you expressed your point but there's no use telling him to take down the video, there are many great self help coaches that have great sympathetic ways of teaching you, also yes leo is changing so his ideas in the past are different from now but that's all part of growth.

Hey man, I'm sorry I couldn't understand it all. Your English isn't the best but it's getting there. I will however try to answer your questions. 1) I used to have the same problem of acting like a child and being immature and not being able to change. It's okay but you need to be working on yourself so you have better mindsets on reality. Fastest way to grow is surround your self with better mature people. You don't have to stop hanging with your other mates but your view of reality gets affected by other people you surround yourself with. You probably to caught up in your past, remind yourself that a lot of us have done stupid things in the past, had the dumbest views on reality and etc. like leo says you must take 100 percent responsibility for your life that even means take responsibility for your past and your current circumstances. 2) I'm guessing you feel that guilt because you have your self image and being sexual goes against who you think you are as a person. Overtime you ego will adapt if that's what your trying to do. 3) Yes ! I have this same issue, I feel that I don't have the right to tell someone I have a crush on a girl because I haven't even talked to them and I don't want to come across as desperate. But just get it out, tell people, even if it sounds stupid, not telling anyone is going to make you stuck. Trust me it's worth it. 4) There's nothing wrong about being fussy with woman, trust me settling for someone you aren't attracted to is going only going to harm you. If you want a girlfriend but can't find one you want. You'l just have to be patient sadly. Just socialize more and try to meet more people i guess. 5) yes in reality you don't exist. But you don't have that truth yet so don't let it get to you. Unless you are really committed. Just worry about living the kind of life you want. Maybe when you have everything set up then you can start working on enlightenment. I may not of read your questions properly and I am sorry about that, I just thought sharing my wisdom may help you, at least a little.

Hey guys I am 17 and I really wish i had someone to talk to about this that can help me out. I've been studying attraction and dating and all things along the lines of this area. Fortunately I've listened to really great dating coaches that go against main stream pick up and manipulation. Of course I do listen to a few that have a bit of manipulation but they also give awareness to this particular issue in pick up. To the point, Iv'e been studying self help for around two to three years now, But i just can't get myself to meet woman and have girlfriends. I feel that if i do not get any dating experience it will bight me in the long run as even i feel not working on this throughout middle school and the start of high school has left me in a huge rut. I've approach woman here and there but Iv'e never been able to have a date with a girl i am attracted to in my entire life. I'm too young to go to bars and clubs so I can't do that. I do go out, But it's extremely rare I'd ever get into something that has girls for me to meet. The only place I can practice at the moment is in my high school, But it's just too hard. There's so many girls I want to be able to meet in conversation but I've been around these people for years. I try to flirt with girls but i always fail, Due to the rare opportunities. Most girls are all in groups with their friends and other guy friends. I can't approach them because i feel as if i were to get rejected or something because i see these girls all the time and if I turn them off. Boom i'm screwed. I actually feel i am already screwed though due to me being immature in the past and having to make a big transition to change myself. I fear that if I fail (I fear i also already have) I will not have a chance anymore and I'l be stuck with them for another year and no relationship experience which is just going to ruin my opportunities in the future. Also I don't even think I have the right to say I have feelings for anybody in my school because I've never been able to have a conversation with someone that I haven't been friend zoned to. I am giving myself anxiety at school, due to this issue, and it has been a distraction, I also feel this was my only drive to improve myself seeming I still don't know who I am. I feel lost as my friends are either got abundance with woman or aren't willing to work or care about this area in life.

Thanks so much for the advice. I really needed someone who understands my situation. But are you saying my solution is outside of face to face? I have texted girls for years ! However I feel that it's just too unlikely to meet someone to date online. Also no matter how much I text it wont improve my face to face interactions and I feel I need to develop that skill. I found that girls just will NOT respond to you on social media as practically all quality girls already have options in face to face interactions and social circles. Also I can't use a dating website because I'm under 18. How would you meet woman and get options?

I believe in order to be in a happy relationship (Iv'e never been in one so I'm not a reliable source of information) you need two components. Without these two components the relationship will not work. first - Attraction, the emotional pull towards someone. This can happen due to how seductive the other person is which can be shown in their appearance, their body language, their personality and masculine/feminine lifestyle behavior. Also many other determining factors. These factors can seduce our emotional brain so to speak, however It is not just shallow traits that cause this attraction. Without this attraction there will be no drive to keeping the relationship and no emotional connection to the other person. It would be more like shallow companionship in order to sustain income and shit in our life, that is why we are miserable when we settle for our partner. second - If your partner has attracted you like this emotionally but on the other hand they do not logically have any benefit to your life, such as loyalty, independence, resonance with your lifestyle and intentions etc. You will also be miserable as you will be attached to someone who is toxic to your life and you end up stuck. That is why there are abusive relationships, divorces and all this nasty shit.

A lot of guys who fail with female attraction tend to blame it on there looks. They assume if only I looked better, maybe girls will give me a chance. I personally do not think looks will save them.

Unless your deformed, mutated or have poor health, such as being too overweight to the point where it's unnatural there's always a way to look attractive physically. Also you got to remember there's a difference between attraction (in terms of looks, sexiness and what not) and style. A lot of people worry about the irrelevant things such as hairstyle, what clothes they wear (How your clothes complement your body however is very important to physical attraction) and whether they should get a tattoo, wear jewelry, get tanned etc. etc. the list goes on. In society we have trends that we learn from models famous people and shit like that. People look up to these celebrities so what they do is considered cool or sexy or whatever. Think about it. No matter how stupid someones dressing style is, if they are loved by many people that will turn into a trend therefore that type of appearance is automatically attractive. This means if you are a confident attractive person your looks automatically become "sexy' by default. So i wouldn't worry about looks, As long as you take care of yourself you can still appear physically attractive doesn't matter about your genetics whether your nose is too big and all that shit.

There waay better than TV and social media i can tell you that. Of course if you have ambitious life goals you need to focus your attention on that rather than other things, it's not that videogames are bad, but if you have shit to do stop worrying about how good your k/d is on cod

dude that's crazy, I've been worried constantly if doing it once a day is to much. However when your feeling groggy it can be a real nice refresher. 20 to 30 times a day is stupid. Your just busting as soon as you feel it lol. instead of doing it multiple times why not just do it once for a long session. feels way better and isn't draining everything in your body.

do approach woman, however do not try to get or own or impress them. Instead state your intentions and your desires as if you were to give an invitation. Work on your body language and communications skills as they will be an asset to you for your entire life. But implement them into a life long behavior rather than use them to attract woman. This is just my idea i came up with, because i am still trying to grasp it myself

Iv'e been puzzled from this for a while now. I guess you could assume that in this extreme complex reality, they go hand and hand and although they go in complete opposite directions, maybe they still lead to the same cause paradoxically. Kinda like there's more than one path to take. I haven't looked into this too much to claim to understand both sides yet, this is just an assumption that may be plausible.