Frankie

Controversial point: Gary Weber has mentioned in a talk on youtube that he personally believes that every perverted form of sexuality is produced by a traumatized ego. If one gets rid of his ego the demand to fulfil this fetish vanishes. To undergird this argument you could say that in the early childhood traumatic experiences could very very easily appear (because you are in this age more or less helpless and helplessness in crucial situations creates traumas). Neil Strauss stresses this point in his book "The Truth". Furthermore, the human brain undergoes a reorganization process in the age of 5. So you simply cannot remember events from the first years - but they stick in your subconsciousness! I don't want to criticise having a fetish or not but it seems to be rather a thing of the broken ego than of the fully enlightened sage ... According to the theory above, it's also a product of early childhood traumatic experiences. You don't have to be beaten in the early childhood years but some kind of very authoritarian upbringing could leave these scars in the subconsciousness that one only gets [sexually] rewarded when he is getting humiliated [like in the early years of childhood] ....

It depends. In general, I would say that I can "see" things which I create in my mind but it's a very dark and not very colourful vision. And I can "hold" the picture only for some moments before it fades away. I think this is okay - some people can dream only in b/w .... as long as I can maintain the focus on the things I'm going to visualize it's all fine I think. (although this is already a huge effort in concentration)

Hey folks, I've begun with a daily visualization routine and have researched [nearly] every information in the internet about this but some questions are still open. I know that there is no real "research" about this topic so just answer how you do this practice and what you would recommend. Should I visualize the end goal or rather the process of getting there? I.e. playing in a giant concert hall (=end goal) or succeeding in practising to play the guitar better than Hendrix at home (=process) and/or getting the next little gig (short-term goal) or something like this....? Leo recommended in his video that one should focus on one goal/area at a time per visualization session but regarding the visualization of the end goal I could merge different areas also in one big picture - like living in a huge mansion (wealth), having a collection of e-guitars which I can play sophisticated (mastery of playing), ... I could also add different people to this vision (representing networking/social success, relationships) and of course physical health, ... So can I merge goals or is it rather ineffective ending up in a big daydream? As I'm writing these lines I'm remembering that I've daydreamed in my youth very often. So visualizing end goals could be perhaps ineffective (otherwise I would have achieved them already?) or I haven't done these visualizations regularly enough ... mmmhh .... ?

Just a plain personal reason to create art: Every time I create art I'm getting in the flow. It's a wonderful feeling. Like meditation is for some people. But I'm more in the present moment by creating art than when I meditate. Perhaps it's my way of meditation? Others do long-distance running or extreme sports ...

If you suffer from feeling lonely it would be also not a huge health benefit. @Steelheart I think suffering is the cause of the health issues with being alone. Many people suffer from being alone. In this case it's better to stay in a social group. But you don't have to suffer.

Hey folks, I'm microdosing AL-LAD since several months and I'm astonished about the positive effects it has for me. I could describe this as a boost in productivity and creativity as well as in communication skills (somehow it's way easier to talk to and to connect with people) and it seems to be easier to get "into the flow" (or live just in the current moment and don't overthink too much). So it seems to have a very positive effect for me. Well, to be honest, I'm rather low-dosing this (37.5 mcg 1-3x per week) and each time I feel a slightly trippy feeling at the beginning (so I'm dosing not really sub-perceptual). My goal is to change my default state so that I've got all the described effects even without taking this substance. As far as I can remember said Paul Austin (The Third Wave) in one of his talks, that he is now [one year after he stopped microdosing] still more in the present moment. I've got no real negative side-effects from this although I must admit, that the positive effects were stronger in the first month. Well, I'm thinking now about perhaps switching the substances or doing even once a higher dosage trip to get the effects permanently? Any opinions/suggestions about this?

Hey Folks, I've got a serious problem which I (=already nearly 37) carry with me for a long time now ... Since the death of my father a few years ago I began to question a bit the things which I'm doing, how I spend my time and what I want to do. I've started also with meditation, watched a bunch of satsangs and spiritual talks on YouTube, stumbled upon RSD and pick-up stuff and questioned also my relationship. My relationship in a nutshell: We are together for nearly 10 years now. No kids. We are also not living together (because I don't want it) but we travel a lot together and spend at least every weekend together. We think different and are different in many many ways. From time to time I'm even wondering how we've managed it to stay together for so long. %-) Our sex is rather boring and so after watching some RSD videos a very intense feeling of missing out something arose....the suggestion to try an open relationship was totally rejected by my girlfriend. Thoughts arose that I could even cheat on my gf, but I've never cheated in an relationship and so I'm struggling with my moral standards ... Getting enlightenend would be probably the best solution to my problems - because no one have to suffer then. Perhaps I get enlightenend some day - perhaps I don't. I'm meditating every day and even longer and longer, doing self-inquiry but despite this I think can't count on getting enlightenend as a solution to my problems. I've had a few other relationships before my current one. I've slept with about 10 girls. I don't know if this is much or not but I've got the feeling for myself that this is not enough. This couldn't be all. But will it ever be enough? If the hunger for sexual experiences behave the same as my former disposedness for taking drugs it should nearly disappear after making the necessary experiences. (If it doesn't it will last and I must realize that I've thrown away my relationship for nothing....) So, I'm stuck in these thoughts here and need an input. Thank you for posting anything that comes to your mind! P.S.: English isn't my mother tongue so there could be a bunch of mistakes here....

Well, I've checked the date of my original post.....nearly 7 months ago I started this thread.... After going through a bunch of issues we finally broke up in a phone call last Wednesday. I've realized before that we were simply together because we are together. If I could choose between her and 10 other girls we probably wouldn't be together any longer. So I've realized that it is simply my comfort zone which I don't want to leave. I didn't want to break up but my words "I don't know if this [our relationship] is in the long run enough to me" prompted her to finish the relationship. The void in everything feels very depressing now. To make things even worse I haven't got any friends or a serious amount of people in my social circle here. This was also an issue - she is very jealous so I had to justify my behaviour every time I went out to meet new people - so I kept it to a minimum ... over the years we've entered a very clingy relationship which was a dead end to me. Anyway - I think at this stage the relationship is finally at its end point. Just wanted to post an update here .... going through the darkest hours/days/weeks in my whole life now ....

@Paan As Grasshopper said: Some fears are genetically "encoded" into our system. Like the feeling of thirst or hunger. These fears wont go away after enlightenment ....

....at least it is about giving up your former self-image, your ego, your belief,....

I was sitting in the burmeese posture too until I got some ugly knee problems as well. The pain wasn't quite as strong when I was just standing or walking but I'm also a passionate runner and I was unable to run for about 6-8 weeks. From this incident on I'm only meditating while sitting in a chair. Perhaps there is a way to meditate in the half lotus or burmeese posture without getting such problems but I wont have these problems again and I don't think that the posture is so important in meditation .....

Perhaps you need to suffer a bit more? Perhaps you need to be stressed out to enjoy the silence in meditation practise? Perhaps you need to get physical problems to enjoy your work-out at the gym? I don't know but some people need to learn it on the hard way. In the meantime I would drop all activities which you are doing just to do them and not doing them with heart. Perhaps you create a space which helps finding your real purpose and getting your energy back ....

BTW: Can you tell me the source (yt video) of this statement? Can't remember it yet but it could be an interesting video ....

Depends on the hobby I think. If you're making music it will be hard to pay your monthly rent for your appartment and so on unless you are extraordinary talented and/or have no qualmy to make commercial stuff. If you're programming software as a hobby it will be quite easy to make a living from that ....

Practise anything that gets you in the present moment. Meditation would be a proper step to achieve this. It really doesn't matter what kind of meditiation because any meditation practise prevents you from drifting away. It taktes some time so you should get meditation into your daily routine like brushing teeth.

AFAIK was the problem with such cheap equipment that the latency is quite high and you need a very quick response so that the feedback loop is working. Don't know if this is still such a problem. Regarding the MindWave products they seem to have several connection issues (according to the reviews on Amazon)....

Some people are already doing this on YouTube ....

Gnarf. I would chose the other way round: Using neuro-feedback to let people learn how to turn off their default-mode-network (which is responsible for the permanent self-talk in your head which keeps you in the dualistic cage). Referring to Gary Weber once you've learned how to achieve this state the brain tends to go back to this new operating state. This way has also the benefit that you've gained means to achieve this state on your own and not through an external stimulation (regardless if it's an electromagnetic impulse or psychedelics). According to this guy here this "re-programming" of the brain could be achieved (perhaps with standard EEG equipment?) in one week - but costs 15,000 $. Dave Asprey talks in one interview about this method (in this video here). I think the demand for an usb or bluetooth neuro-feedback device for your smartphone which costs about 400 bucks is really there (and we would probably do a collective order in this forum ).

Some people I just don't trust. Don't know why this is the case but he is one of them. A back-stabber....

Once I've had an affair with an very promiscuous girl many years ago who told me that size DOES matter (but that I should never get any complains in this case ) .... honestly I think that you should be on safe ground with an just normal size (as Neuroticon has written above).

The funniest part in this is that Paul Smit and Lisa Cairns are acting in this scene: Addiction .... There are also some more or less funny episodes in this playlist:

When you are day dreaming you are taken away on some thoughts, images and storys. That has nothing to do with the present moment with which you would like to establish a connection when you are meditating .... be present, be mindful - not dreamy ....

@brovakhiin IMO it's a bit different from pure mindfulness. In my eyes it gives the subconsciousness a "hint" that it could let go of emotions or thought structures which are no longer useful. You could get there also by using mindfulness but concerning problematic emotions the Sedona method seems to be a straighter way to achieve this. Personally I think in stressful situations it's easier to go through the 4 steps of the Sedona method than to use mindfulness meditation however this may differ from person to person ....

I understand this point very well but I think this will lead you farther away from enlightenment and the success is questionable as well .... I was suffering from some kind of social anxiety as well and I can tell you that letting these emotions go established a real progress! I had no success with telling myself "I am .... this or that ..." but using the Sedona method for example brought a real success. And after that you have no filthy and false affirmations in your mind which will hinder you from making progress in enlightenment. So you may try to inquire on theses fears or to use the Sedona technique or Byron Katie's method. Any of these will work (some better some worse), they let you overcome any fears you got and make your mind free for the path towards enlightenment. You may "practise" the Sedona method a few times but I were really astonished how fast this method works (especially when you are on the way to a social event and the anxiety kicks in very hard with fast heart beat, sweating,....). Just let the anxiety go. These are just my 2 cents on this topic.