Origins

In order of my fav's (so may change overtime): 1. Thoughts of Awareness (reflexive) - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/59803-thoughts-of-awareness-reflexive/#comment-810597 2. Origins: Chronicles of Existence, the Diagnostic Interface for the Extension of Being - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58876-origins-chronicles-of-existence-the-diagnostic-interface-for-the-extension-of-being/#comment-808182 3. Principles I'm Creating for Having a Journal - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/57745-principles-im-creating-for-having-a-journal/#comment-777047 4. FAMOUS RANTS - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/59764-famous-rants/#comment-809880 5. Just a random journal on the Principles of War - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/57557-just-a-random-journal-on-the-principles-of-war/#comment-773818 6. Entrepreneurship Manual: For people serious about World Progress [OFFICIALLY STARTS FEB 1st] - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58935-entrepreneurship-manual-for-people-serious-about-world-progress/#comment-797033 7. Origins: Chronicles of Existence, the Diagnostic Interface for the Extension of Being - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58876-origins-chronicles-of-existence-the-diagnostic-interface-for-the-extension-of-being/#comment-808182 8. Autobiographical Reflective Insight Journal: 0 Years to Now - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58463-autobiographical-reflective-insight-journal-0-years-to-now/#comment-808827 9. Just starting a journal to pin diamonds on the chest of time - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/57509-just-starting-a-journal-to-pin-diamonds-on-the-chest-of-time/?page=2#comment-808933 10. Music (-- My Improvisations -- Daily Challenge) [ OFFICIALLY STARTS FEB 1st] - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/59671-music-my-improvisations-daily-challenge/#comment-808477 11. Improvised Short Stories - Daily Challenge [ OFFICIALLY STARTS FEB 1st] - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/59752-improvised-short-stories-daily-challenge/#comment-809601 12. Ideal Partner - True Love Inevitability - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/59661-ideal-partner-true-love-inevitability/#comment-808384 13. Journal for Visions (Corresponding PhotoShop Beginner stuff) - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58935-entrepreneurship-manual-for-people-s5rious-about-world-progress/#comment-797033 14. Thought Experiments - AS THE THOUGHT ARISES - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58547-thought-experiments-as-the-thought-arises/#comment-790403 15. Random consciousness streaming notes - https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/58905-random-consciousness-streaming-notes/#comment-809867

13th of January - Legendary incident of existential non-negotiable fuckery: Note to self: Always remember to tell cops where to shove it like I did today. Arrogant prick I put him in his place and he couldn't do shit about it other than watch me laugh as I walk off. Thinking you had any authority over me after you passed your police exams completely backfired you stupid slave (not insulting cops other than this one), brain cells aren't easily grown from your DNA that's for sure. One of the highlights of the year so far, played the guy perfectly, like a fucking guitar but with more dexterity than I usually do, now go sing Kumbaya to your fellow prison inmates as you wash out the rest of your life with your self imposed slavery (because you're too freaking ignorant about your own brainwashing). You are owned, I am free. And I will destroy all you clowns more and more overtime.

you learn of the many energies that are present in consciousness, and through that awareness, the ability to let go (release) and the ability to move forward. Many of these energies are in competition with universal being, they prevent the full expression of the universe in this sense (the aspect of the universe of primary concern here being what I refer to as I, me, my, the apparent persistent existence of my consciousness, not to be confused with stereotypical "ego" and various other traditions I don't really follow/conform to) These energies flow up and down the subconscious of energetic being, and there are potentially millions of them, formed experientially, now moving around in consciousness, waiting to see the light of conscious awareness, and like vomit, even if only slightly, the energy flows out, or back in in a different way (like undesirably swallowing ones own vomit which in this case is due to mishandling consciousness content), at this point, as it appears you must attend to it (those or any of those energies) like it was your baby, soothing its every need with pure awareness and insight and then releasing it back into the universe leaving it to go where it wishes to, released from consciousness or into a new container therein amongst other formed, transformed and transforming energies There is no clear agency behind the arrival of many of these energies, this agency comes afterwords, an agency of which is itself the dominating energy that makes up that which we refer to as true self, which is why free will is such a disturbingly obvious subject in the context of how easily traditional science gets this subject wrong, they see things solely through a cause and effect paradigm, not a geometrical energetic paradigm. Back to the initial though, due to this lack of agency, at least from the conscious aspect of self, these energies have no clear cause and effect with this moment, only that they appear to be the thing that wishes to surface in the ocean of this present. This is why it’s so important to place your attention (so ontological mastery), on the capital S Self, so that the Self can release itself, it is the primordial zone of the universe that is designed to constantly refresh, reiterate, dissolve and renew through what should be a constant seamless state of rebirth inside an intrinsic individuality spread across the collective sum of intelligence Unknowns at this point: what happens to energies when patterns between some energies that are related and others that are not, at least not directly, do they merely become a cognitive reference point, and a new kind of energy emerges, a combination of the sorts, reflectively (in terms of like a mirror)?

Just use your head. Anyone else giving any kind other advice is wrong. If you can't use your head you're just wasting your time and should just spend time growing it then go traveling.

Daily Short stories as a personal challenge for the rest of the year. Starting soon (latest Feb 1st). I’m releasing a book on the imagination in 2022 as I’ve spoken about exploring all of its dimensions and permutations et al. so this will be a good back door into that. There’s a few other journals I’m thinking about starting as well, an ideational/invention one for example I think would be a good idea, something like this, as well as an ideationally based one from the perspective of scientific experiments. Other journals I’ll definitely start is a sharing of my documentation of research on various cultures, countries, geographies and global patterns (inside and outside human activity), for example. Naturally I think I’ll need a separate folder/library for all my journals alone to keep track of them from now on haha.

Day 0-1: Imaginative Exploration - quickly improvised because I promised to write on it Here I am In the hands of a doctor Who cuts, My umbilical cord Mother why so much responsibility here? But not enough towards healing your own mind? Your mind created the most damage To every husband, child and close friend As I lay here, now in your arms Without the ability to speak, and call you a whore (well, here I am right) My father prevented from seeing me in the hospital causing him much anxiousness, But when in my presence without reservation, he does not extend his perception to my individual existence beyond his So to these contradictions, as I lay here in your arms Too slowly my prefrontal cortex grows, so I can cast you both out of the hospital and send you your fate Unable to handle the creative life force of life creation As I crawl, outside these hospital walls, now away from both your arms The first time, light piercing my eyes, what’s this? My neurons begin to tune my occipital lobe as well as eye rods and cones for the first time The feeling of touch, a repressed invisible memory that presses against every part of my being especially brain upon recalling Who is this world, how is this world and what am I? Bouncing, tapping and sucking toys became something of a higher cause in early life than asking questions for quite some time Doctor, doctor, looking into my eyes, it’s a boy you say and not cancer for my mother as was mistakenly earlier reported But I felt like cancer still played an invisible theme in our life growing up How many babies did you deliver today? And did I not know that thousands more came into that world on this same day? Knowing I realise now, comes after feeling the world So how did it become this way that my mind would replace parts of my feeling? It seems that I, took a wrong turn somewhere, cut from my umbilical cord I did not know of the great and subtle choices I would have to make as I made sense of this world Carried to the car from the hospital by the safest hands, looked after and cared for with distorted love from one of the least safest minds With you I pierce through the scope of your being and surrender all your responsibility, what could you do other than what you knew, but with what you knew why did you not try to know more? This is a question of wills, but more to circumstances that did not navigate the will as it has mine Responsible I am before life creation, but then as I reflect on my first day wide eyed on earth, perhaps no more life creation at all, from me, as I look out in partial dismay, I must remember to broaden my scope even further and reignite the truth that should be followed, and delivered, like I Held by the safest hands, now looked after by the safest mind; me Will continue to reflect on this day, it gives me very visceral raw feelings, as for the actual content, of course, perhaps all imaginary, but the feelings themselves regarding the actual day not the noted tangential feelings, certainly have some realness to them beyond mere imagination P.S - Sometimes I use language I don't actually mean by the way, its just spontaneous expression.

Note to self: Don't talk to people that treat you as a part of their thought experiment in sense based interaction. You're not just a thought in their brain as much as they solipsistically wish to refer to you as. It's just their fear. It's just their ego. Forgive them.

First thought experiment - Self Referential Variable Personal Life Perspectivism Seeing my life from the perspective of any one being that’s ever existed or could exist, flexibly moving from the personal (someone I don’t like) to the impersonal (someone or something I’ve never met). Strategy - just invent imaginary profiles and see what novel insights I get from that perspective: 1) from the perspective of an old transsexual (just as a cultural mindfuck seeing I’ve never met one nor do I have any particular interest beyond say scientific exploration) with a bionic arm and sexual ornament (which changes shape and sexual orientation depending on preference at the time) that’s now the first human to have lived 200 years old 80 years from now, what do they think of my life, what I have done, where I plan to go. More to their profile: - they have a genius IQ - they are homophobes (I am not nor am I homosexual so don’t be reading too much 8nto just having fun with this) - they are high in conscientiousness, with strong perfectionistic tendencies - they have an originally Greek background, but because they have lived for decades in a number of varying cultures due to their high openness, they can no longer be easily classified outside of certainly now falling to the category of Global Citizen - they hold a position in the United Nations, and in this situation the UN now actually do something meaningful compared to today’s times and aren’t corrupt - they are enlightened, but they don’t need to believe in any so called absolutes - they are ambiverts have a social circle that is moderate and consists of mainly people that support their cultural causes they support in the UN - they are 9 feet tall so they needed their own plane built for themselves for their UN travels that taxpayers complain about 2) from the perspective of God. Build the profile of many variants of your perception of God so that you can see how foolish the endeavour actually is. One that is all benevolent and loving, notice the psychological effects of having them view your life. Now one that I’d indifferent, imagine how having them view your life produces different emotional effects. Now one that is like an authoritarian parent. Now correlate people’s perceptions of a God with either religious teachings, parental styles they were brought up with or the inverse of that sometimes. 3) from the perspective of a younger, older, wiser version of yourself. A clone of yourself and imagine how you might communicate with said clone to bring about an insight feedback loop between one another. A version of yourself that grew up on a farm instead, purely in the city or in a luxury environment in the mountains. Imagine the things they might say, insights they might draw, etc. 4) an extraterrestrial, again similar to the latter two create multiple kinds of personality, bodily and cognitive profiles and do so even far richer than the profile noted in the first example (9ft 200yr old transsexual). 5) Literally anything, a bird, plane, giraffe, something completely imaginary. It's all up to you. The Earth. The universe. So on and so fourth. Test what you're able to connect with. Explore. 6) Now discover the perspectives that are most meaningful to you. The people that have influenced you most in your life, what would they think about what I have done? What I am doing? Where I am going? What I will accomplish or not accomplish? Where I may fail? Maybe you imagine your life from the perspective of your parents, which I believe many people do and think these kinds of experiments have many real world observational subjective implications as it concerns understanding what motivates peoples sociocultural inner reality, the latter which can be described as containing these figures in their imagination that they commune with subconsciously to determine the rightness and wrongness of their lives. In understanding the deeper limits here, we can augment that process through discovering the imaginative heights that can help us entertain higher wisdom. Understanding the relationship between imagination, motivation, sociocultural inner landscape, model, reality.

Okay so looks like I've sucked so far at updating this journal, thanks to an esteemed member ( ) here though I'm now going to pay much more attention to this. I'll have my first response done by the end of today. From here on out I'll do a challenge of including an autobiographical journal here every day until at least the end of next month.

@PepperBlossoms Creativity is everything, thus the one and only. This is all you need to focus on in life (inclusive of rigid processes that need to be followed). Trust me here, I have thought for many years on this subject. Spend the rest of the year solely focusing on creativity and generating a deeper and deeper understanding of that subject and you’ll thank me later. Don’t listen to any other person, they’re wrong. Wrong path, wrong maze, wrong words, wrong everything. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing else.

@PepperBlossoms I believe in always throwing myself at the chaos of life, no rules other than those negotiated just growth and integration. You’ve gotta be more brave with your movements, jump into life, then contemplate. You can’t contemplate life if you start out in a dark room, you have to experience life first before you can begin to reflect on and learn from it.

@neutralempty You're welcome [ Join the F-Society].

@LostStudent as long as you start and end with awareness, it doesn’t matter where you are in life in a relationship what matters is how you both come together in the middle. As long as you know your genuine weaknesses not those your mind tries to fabricate, you’ll be able to prioritise towards your strengths and so will he/she. Use awareness as one of the things that you screen for in a potential relationship of some kind. Get creative and aware of what you’re up against, look for someone able to support you there and you them and you’ll be on your way. Don’t fall for cultural norms around “the perfect relationship dynamics that must exist before a relationship commenced”, most people are bullshitters, it’s awareness the whole way through first and foremost everything else is ancillary. You’ll never be perfect and neither they, but are you both aware enough to see into them and they you to the point where you both either recognise compatibility or incompatibility relative to one another’s trajectories then either come together well or move on with ease, that’s the question.

Sure. Algorithm check. Robotic stance relative to the mental prowess of John Locke... Check. (by the way other than drugs as well - but I just got back from a primary’s schools fete and there were all these protesters with signs chanting “Say no to drugs”. It got in my head, so did some of their crazy). 1. Get in touch with the association also cortex, map what comes from a sing,e word as an example. - Example: Neutralempty Step 1: first associations and connotations that pop up - First thing I read was neural not neutral, honestly your name elicits depressing feelings, no offence but I feel like I just saw a car crash... and people died, whether or not those two incidents are connected is still something I’m trying to workout if it’s true then that means cars can kill people. Cars. Kill. People. Joe Biden is president. Shit. Is this the life I woke up to? Zombies are real. Shit. I always knew it. Step 2: Question - the subconscious always has a relative answer to a question - what other associations come up from the name? (Including neutron) - what memories come up from the feeling? - when was the first time I experienced this? And hey if you’re into past lives you get to say, “Okay did I first experience this in this life or a former past life?” Of course, that makes like searching through the whole planets dumpster for a $100 bill the more past lives you have. - So far the questions target at least three areas: A. Associations B. Memories C. Broad experiences / feelings Just keep going like this until you’ve (1) targeted all the main areas of human psychology and being and (2) have dug deep enough with a chain of carefully reflected upon questions. Recommendation, do it in a dance club and then try it out while ? listening to some alpha wave music, you’ll then likely do yourself the favour of prioritising the latter. Set aside 10 min a day to setup a habit. 3. Categories of existence relative to being A. Now you need to organise your perceptions here and shape them in a way that is going to improve your orientation in the world (not your sexual orientation, mental orientation, on that note, how many mental orientations are there? Infinite past lives, infinite Joe Biden’s as president. Ouch) Example: - after examine my feelings and associations relative to your name I now have x story to explain y mental phenomenon that encompasses my chain of reasoning. —-> it’s as simple as that. Relatively busy today but free to ask more questions and I’ll answer when I can, even before I’m through my long term 4 year depression of Biden messing up the English language during speeches, interviews and while on the golf course. No not birdy Biden... Bogey. You got a bogey. Add a few more points to your politically elect coverup.

@Thought Art other than the positive effects of body work and say future brain implants and hours of listening to Donald Trump and Joe Biden debate around a jacuzzi filled with skanky cross dressing male prostitutes it’s never anything else other than a feedback loop that reflects something like the following: 1. Attention on the mind and body 2. Awareness on the minds automatic patterns 3. Organisation of those patterns relative to their origins 4. Repatterning relative to some underlying truth about life (I.e. mines more concrete but it could be something as simple as “presence”) This effectively overtime updates the perceptual frames of your memories that become your automatic patterns as a reflexive action to encoded experience.

@LastThursday I would focus on being (essence) over living (though just on the subject of our circumstances around the term living: dreaming is useful as long as we teach ourselves to dream well).

Harnessing and augmenting the mind, for your meditation - a very quick diagram I made:

@Strangeloop You're not learning from your experiences (outside of this get out of your head and be looking after your health, etc), that much is obvious; you keep on making posts about the same topic. This is not good for your future, you're wasting a lot of time by avoiding simply sitting down to meditate on what has happened and learn the lessons from your experience, that's a large part of why you exist. Whatever you're experiencing right now, sit in the experience and learn from it, that's why you have a brain and a mind to augment it. This posting behaviour has to improve Strangeloop, as a reflection of your actual learning more than anything else, for your benefit more than anyone else. You must get more disciplined with yourself. Here's a diagram I just very quickly created that will be of some use in your reflections if you take the time to understand it (feel free to ask questions), kind of looks like a robot haha:

@egoeimai Don’t be addicted to dumb shit and most of your problems will simply fade away. You don’t realise that you’re positively reinforcing an addiction you didn’t realise you even had, programmed by a screen ? and social networks paid for by news media, film and governmental influences to keep you at a lower state of consciousness. You... Are already free. It feels unnatural to begin with to start reinforcing biochemical feedback loops within yourself that facilitate a higher state of consciousness. But. This. Is. Just. How. It. Is. You’re not going to fool anyone aware here. You don’t deserve sympathy right now because you’re not showing yourself enough empathy, you’re simply looking for attention. When you begin to show yourself some empathy, then you can begin to act with self respect, an intention that you can incrementally leverage to higher states of awareness. This is when we can begin to truly converse on this thread, until then, you’ll be locked in your addiction to fear. It’s an untold lie, that fear was anything more than this, an evolutionary response (survival purposes serves as necessary) and memories with this kind of cellular information that still need to be transmuted. Truth. Love. Freedom. Does this addiction truly serve my transformation towards higher being or does it not? That’s the only relevant question for you on the subject of addiction.

The beginning to the end of existence and all of what it is outside of that story. This is all a choice I know it, I’ve tested it. Choice is a manifestation of the way the universe transforms itself, choicelessness is to the experience of our subjectivity from an intersubjective perspective of larger existence where we are in allowance for inevitably to play itself out, we can opt in or we can opt out by the relative measurement of mind. I have choice. I choose you. But for you, black panther of great mythologies, I want you to make sure you always choose you. Everything after that is your choice. May this first day of the year be the beginning of the next stage of your unity with yourself, and through that, all nebula, the universe and all of your past and future lives that now live among the stars forming to create the new milky-way of this great new year that next year will live in the stars that make the beautiful synapses of your mind. Connection to yourself is your revolution and interconnection ours. Let’s write Shakespearean versus, both the meaningless and carefree, “to be or not” said the overly tight pants wearing dramatic actor, to the meaningful and heartfelt, “My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite”, Romeo and Juliet; Shakespeare. Two roads diverged in a wood, and we are taking the one less traveled as Robert Frost may say, and able to risk it all on one turn of pitch and toss, and lose and start against our beginnings, we’ll be unified always to our true selves, as Rudyard Kipling might say. Today, you live today for you, in the way you truly wish, and the universe will open up to you in ways you can’t imagine, and you to it, for both our betterment and transformation, with no idea what’s around the corner of one another’s minds, but this is why we do this, and even if we know, it’s because we know, that we’ve already chosen why we do this. Laters dork.

@aerox1988 mind games? Bro when that shit starts I’m outta here. Minimal time wasting should be your priority and right now you’re wasting hers. If you can’t be the person she wants by being yourself who the hell is she in a relationship with when she’s with you and she’s fallen for traits, things that aren’t even you? I’d dump your ass immediately as soon as I worked you out.

@Daffcio why haven’t you moved out yet? Throw that attachment underneath the bus until she becomes a good crossing lady to direct traffic.

@BornToBoil honestly what a loser. “He’s scared”, I mean c’mon. It’s a massive red flag to be scared in this situation and under these circumstances.

@Username yeah just tell them to fuck off. They’ll eventually get the picture, start taking over the authority that is rightly yours. I once grudgingly told my father to put the television in his will instead of me because he spends/spent so much time watching it, it was so freaking hilarious. My mother once said “I don’t think you like me” and I said yeah that’s because you’re a bitch. The day will inevitably come where you have to bridge more and more to your sovereign universal individuation. You’ll find your own way. Strength.

The end point is a universal relationship with everyone. Just to give you a glimmer. The universe is an unfoldment on top of an ephemeral sunbeam.