Origins

Just on the links above - @Bando Frieda Pinto is like a 5 to me, the same to Melodie Monrose and Taylor Hill. Even Adriana Lima isn’t above a 7 for me.

@soos_mite_ah I know I don't get that either. When I used the word math as I did initially in this thread, its complicated math, not straight forward math as culture likes to oversimplify it "Oh you're a 5, 6, etc, etc". As long as your nose isn't Everest / analogous you have to be more open minded to at least both a +/-2 depending on what demographic is viewing you, and that too, is still oversimplifying things.

And to me she's not even that attractive, just like meh

@Emerald Oh my god I so wouldn't be comparing yourself to these chicks. They're totally overrated. You don't realise how important personality is to guys that have a brain cell as well as how overrated in general looks are to guys like this. They actually have a developed prefrontal cortex remember.

@StateOfMind this is really simple, like a cat finding its kitty litter. Okay, so there's truth now. And then after that all you have is your intelligence which is of relative truth simply because our intelligence is extremely far off from maximising itself. I mean we're not doing things that are arguably that much more sophisticated than finding our kitty litter like the cat when you think about it. We don't even have a type II civilization yet. Anything beyond this, sorry to say, is really just intellectual masturbation going around in circles. After you've maxed out the utility of your intelligence, that's your kitty litter of truth to "ass dump" your best ideology in.

On a 1 to 10 scale... All of these would follow with actions of course that reflect that desire. 1. Desire for truth 2. Desire for no needless conflict (though there's always an open invitation to constructive challenges) 3. Desire for self awareness 4. Desire for connection that isnt corrupted by that need - so understanding one another, lots of communication - practicals can include but are not limited to dream analysis, psychological growth work for the both of us, understanding how our histories have affected us, the same too with our present perspectives on the world and how those can be shaped to our betterment 5. Desire to be insightful - I need insight on things as well that's a part of connection of course 6. Desire to be creative

@Preety_Indiahaha yeah we just don't realise how much of it is mental noise. Signal to noise ratio. It's hard enough doing it with ourselves that doing it with relationships as well should seem obvious but even to me as well it was counterintutive. Only now did I.... I think I've always longed for some special undeniable unbreakable connection as well which now I realise after trial an error is just kind of foolish and that is probably just some childhood trauma I gotta resolve. I'm never going to be satisfied if I'm always like that, and that dissatisfaction is only going to hurt the connections I do have. So I just gotta focus on what works and remove the least best bits and work from there. This theme of "it's gotta be this seamless perfect connection otherwise it's not true" is a subconscious narrative that's played it's part in both male (I'm heterosexual so friendship based) and female relationships. It's this notion of ideal love which which has sabotaged things [I now realise it's a pipe dream and for the most part you gotta just take people where they are, including yourself and just work towards what's true]. I now realise you just gotta be with the is, remove the isn't and appreciate the mystery in between (as opposed to trying to say, control it).

Simple. Because people are dumb. Culture equals = front row seat the shit show of stupidity. If you know it's all dumb, you'll be okay and this isn't negative by the way, if you at all by any measure get sucked in. Your done. It's all over. See you later. You didn't pass the test. You play the game, don't get played. Outside of this only spend time fostering connections that aren't false.

Inclusive of game is all just advertising to evolutionary biology anyhow, short term stuff. I don't play my old video games anymore, they're boring I've out grown them. I'm looking for things (i.e. the big R) in life that have more substance.

People are so addicted these days to everything outside of themselves, it can be hard to distinguish whether you're connecting with them or their addiction / need for reaction they want/need you to have outside of them being their spontaneous selves. What on earth is this sub-culture coming to? Geesh, just be real yo.

@Renee_7777 You have to always start with connection, then at the very least you start and end with connection with yourself. I just can't the noise outside of that anymore. It's seriously not worth it beyond short term returns mostly. This short term world is frustrating heh.

@levani self help is such a delusional industry as well you gotta remember that they prey on people's insecurities that if they never had most would never even consider self improvement until they were like enlightened / analogous PS - simultaneously battling a seagull (with my stern looks of disapproval mostly - it seriously works) for my own food as I type this comment haha

@levani it’s all bs, just have a nice smile, have larger than average hand gestures / body synchronisation, be genuine in your feelings there and be friendly/feel empowered. Finally be able to carry yourself verbally. Everything else is pretty much snake oil outside of nuances that aren’t really going to matter beyond you being marketed well to.

This is all just math. Stay in school kiddos!

@Danioover9000 to add to my comment you responded to sometimes you gotta light it up though before revenge is needed to let people know you mean serious business. That can sometimes be a unique fail safe to revenge, because they’ll fear that you’ll be the kind of person that would take revenge. Not that I consciously do this but I’ve noticed it works in terms of retrospectively analysing some people’s actions. It’s important to be assertive from the outset so that they always expect that this is going to be your default regardless. Assertively pissed off (ideally strategically), for example.

@Danioover9000 thanks for reminding me of this post haha

@Flowerfaeiry I’ve explored all, there’s no solution outside of discerning, understanding and regulating the patterns of consciousness/being. At the root level at least. That’s what I now prioritise and everything else is meh.

@HERO_ You still haven’t resolved it within yourself otherwise you wouldn’t be afraid. You’ve just got a lot of noise there. I would concentrate on disposing the noise in the bin and then just calmly moving to your purpose. Be careful of all kinds of mental creations including these, garbage men never fathomed that their purpose growing up would be to dispose of rubbish, though for many but not all of them, that’s all they’re capable of doing. Purpose is merely a question surfaced around capability, not desire, we can desire the latter to pair with the former but we must create those conditions. Purpose is therefore a creative act, remember that, you could be involved in a car accident today and then suddenly your purpose is to be confined to a wheelchair for 10 years, or a at least a large part of your physical purpose.

Making meaning out of meaninglessness isn’t a high IQ solution. Whole philosophies and movements exist because of this lower IQ resolution on reality. We can’t start any kind of conversation by beginning with meaninglessness, it’s synonymous to a state of mind we equate to freedom of consciousness, enlightenment, a conversation which also is a non-starter beyond talking about what it isn’t and what we aren’t but sometimes think we are.

For me on a personal level though, life is enough as life to be a motivation. I don’t need any person, thing, external, etc. The end game for me is just to observe and adjust to more accurate patterns. When you’re in presence, truly, motivation reveals itself, check my phone (no point right now), grab some water (no need right now though), wait I’ll shift my bottle because it’s in the sun... etc. This latter aspect speaks to reactive motivation, I see being motivated purely by life itself as active motivation as it comes from the intellect and intelligence as well after lived experience has resulted in categories such as life, in this sense, life to be lived. Fully? Partially? These are just movements of the bowels, you shift around the internal patterns until you’re completely internally free to the point that you can move calmly to more actualised patterns like as noted an active pattern that isn’t hampered by what is in the moment choiceless karma (I.e. feelings within the body and mind we ought to process to process better, which can often be done by finding and following said active pattern when one leverages their activity towards prioritising awareness in that sense).

@Preety_India Our motivational system is really simple, if you can just map out what doesn’t motivate you you’ll be left with what does. I’d combine that with what does but doesn’t really speak the truth so you can weed out false motivations.

This has all actualized itself perfectly for me (intersections of time coalescing into one well timed insight for radical transformation). Note to self: Remember to sign post this using the method of loci, utilise this as a tie into mapping consciousness now for now what I realise to be best production (there's nothing else). Patterns over answers, actions based on best patterns relative to mapping in the moment (designed to connect to former mapping). Recursive feedback loop. Release ideals but work towards increasingly refined sculpted versions of them them. Context for consolidation - as a part or just colour to add to the sign posting noted above: "... I just don't want to be like my father (i.e. unable to properly update his memories in the present moment about his perceptions of others - that's one of his difficulties, especially as he's gotten older. I'd like to really look after my mind throughout my life to avoid that). That's one of my goals. Reveals the importance of me poking holes in my own awareness and what I believe in the context of the present moment. I guess I could say the same about my mother, but their difficulties merge in different ways, thus still could to use them both as a compass of what I'd like to avoid. It's all just patterns and adaptation, the rest is history in the end on how to work those patterns better. And I realise only just now that that's really the only war that exists for me, getting those patterns right. Everything else is just noise. For me its just about my own awareness, but there are no restrictions. It's just about my own awareness. And as for my parents. For all people including myself there's things I'd like to learn and things I'd like to not learn/unlearn you know, so they've obviously got some positive traits as well, its really just about the whole picture and how all those patterns fit together."

5-7 years of age - Tap dancing for the dollar, give me love: Mother, your joy for the arts is what inevitably got me to reflect that passion through my busking (very successfully) at 5-7 years of age on the city streets of Melbourne tap dancing (zero prior experience) after you took me to a show called Tap Dogs. What did it feel like though, to beg your son to continue tap dancing so you could take more money from your sons efforts to pay for your bills? What did it feel like though, to ask one of your close friends that you used as an emotional tampon to manipulate me into those efforts at that age on the second floor of Mc Donald's previously located near the corner of Flinders street and Swanston Street? Did you not know that I would one day grow older and reflect on the emotional undercurrents of that experience outside the joy of expressing myself on two wood panels with my tireless feet? Did you not know that I would hold you to the same standard that I hold myself to if I were to ever have a son at that age and needed bills to pay, that I would slit my wrists before I ever asked my son to tap dance to pay your bills? Not only that, to further add to the sickness, my siblings would use $500 of that money I earned to buy a ring for you because we were deluded by your own distorted love you provided us because we didn't have enough contrast on our emotional and general life experiences in the context of what constituted good versus bad parenting. How is it that I can figure the emotional maturity of what were meant to be my almost 10 year senior brother and sister? Why had they not gathered the perspective necessary yet in their life yet to peel back the layers of your bullshit? The female antics, your emotionality clouded our reasonable detection. 20 years later, you make a statement to me, "I don't think you like me", mother, I don't think you've reflected on the possibility that all I would need to do is reflect earnestly on my experiences for a mere 5 minutes to make that as an unbreachable concluding statement as the police of my subconscious mind stampeded all honourable perceptions I previously held of you to hold them under parental arrest. Your kindness mother, albeit good when its angel like nature appeared in the midst of darkness, was implanted with several security cameras around it in lieu of your general lack of responsibility. Your love mother, was filled with an earnest hug, a scream though and stampeding footsteps often found themselves in my childhood dreams for no other reason other than to say your love was not great enough. Your poor choice in husbands mother, simply because they were handsome, dominant and successful, is reflected in the immateriality of your consistency in relationships. You gave them both the sack, and manipulated your children so much that it took them too long that you needed the sack; bound up and constrained by the duckling imprinting phenomenon, eyes unable to see the reality that lived beyond the attachment, as they, watched you manipulate me, calmly, to continue tap dancing for your empty pockets because of how poorly you treated your husbands and they you (consequently in both senses, though the first husband is much kinder than my own father; my father is very generous, of which his kindness surrounds, outside this he's objectively speaking, not the kindest of people outside of his own distorted social reference frames that guide his own self-importance).

Unless they're both psychopaths/related, people who don't genuinely care for their significant other should all things considered be significantly offed out of the arrangement either forcefully with a dramatic ending to some unromantic but nonetheless still tragically beautiful story or strategically manoeuvred to a sewerage pipe so they know what it feels like to feel the emptiness of someones stomach on a literal (faeces, urine reference) level. Gotta keep things dramatic in your life actions otherwise you're a boring sod who probably has a genetic history of slavery; I hit the genetic lottery by comparison then? Life is still moving. In reality, its snake like, in films, its box office when the plot is well done, Spielberg elevate the psychopath please as we watch her big boobs slowly constricting some old rich sod or as some sociopathic cringe guy creeps out an 18 year old university freshmen in some horror as well as potentially / comedy flick with his cockroach can't swat this fly away like infestation into her life. Let me feel the pharaoh of mystique dance around me right now, create pyramids of death on all people without a spine on romance. Love your significant other as defiantly romantically as possible until they can't handle it anymore, which is why you must find an equal there, otherwise building pyramids for others to look at after their death is pointless. Life is your pyramid for us to observe, don't just be an NPC talking the lines of culture without any significant originality, I mean, look at you, what the fuck is a "fuck boy", why are fuck boys all created equal? Fuck boys are significantly different from one another, and they're entirely different from the actual men. Lose the labels, they don't have any significance beyond talking and humming the NPC to sleep and then waking the drone up ready for their factory work in the cultural shit show of mind numbing insignificance. Burn the world that man built and all that will remain is beautiful nature that man will then be forced to appreciate for all their false currencies, structures, beliefs and disownment of what is truly significant, like their significant other, will be destroyed.

Yes just ask. Otherwise for me honestly who gives a shit, you should be questioning what value you have as a man for yourself and what you're trying to accomplish and how women/woman fits into that picture more than worrying about women. Both men and women have have been brainwashed by such dysfunctional mindsets around dating, all programmed by certain societal breeding vs non-breeding agendas prepared to suit the cultural and in general economic agendas around status and bonding. Side note: guys get played so easily by women so naive. In general I just say fuck off (figuratively, I literally don't even give it a second thought other than the learning) and move on. Do you know how many women there are in your average city? Perspective. So yes ask, seriously why are you worried at all about the outcome? How many women do you really line up with spiritually, hobbies wise, personality, and all other important indicators to seriously worry about one woman's opinion? They're like 1 in a million/billion, so for everyone else, it's a mastered feedback loop of learning inside and outside of relationships, and its not to "get good with women", do you know how low of a mentality that is? Its about getting good with all of existence. Seriously, dominate the fuck out of that learning loop and you'll meet the right person for you, inside and outside the learning, outside is to spontaneity, your true essence, your authenticity, what you truly fucking want before existence blows you up outta here like all the rest of us, inside its like, "okay settle down, there's a balance between full expression and seeing the other person", but that's just really empathy and knowledge about existence of which the opposite sex form a very small part. Treat every women at their true essence, in order to do that YOU must always be striving to be at your true essence. Trust me, that's how you build a relationship, that's how you stay in truth, honesty and your personal integrity allowing you to care much less about outcome while prioritising learning therein.