Kid A

There's a huge gender difference here, imo. It may actually be my favorite dialect if we're talking women. Men: Not so much!

Something tells me that George Orwell would never have written that book if he knew it would be used by people like Jordan Peterson to justify their whining about their first world problems.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aSO9OFJNMBA&t=2s&ab_channel=MattLaufenberg I think this deserves a thread on this forum. I have no clue about spirituality, but aren't they really on to something here? I especially liked this one from the commentary section: "Wearing enough hats" is being used in both a literal and a metaphorical sense in this scene. When it is said that "Hat sales have increased, but not pari passu", we must be talking about literal hats. But metaphorically, "to wear more than one hat" is to take on more than one role in a setting or organization - which would increase the opportunities for "guided self-observation" to assist in the development of the soul."

I went on over 40 dates before I found one who was interested back, and I'm still breathing. I had a very similar experience with my first date though, so I feel you there. You should move to a bigger city, unless it's physically impossible.

Casual night clubs. Maybe it's a Norwegian thing, but it works! Thanks. I should definitely try this.

Couldn't agree more. In my experience during the night, girls will treat me like I'm a human being with emotions only if I'm with friends and wear a suit. Too bad I like girls who care about more than my clothes, and I don't have any friends to go out with atm. Solo nightgame makes me really consider suicide almost every time.

I've slept with two so far. Nearly got into a relationship with one of them. I mean being able to have successful cold approaches and dates. I had my worst results right after I came back from a solo retreat a couple of months ago. Many girls reacted like I was a giant snake when I approached them. Seems like not being social makes you repulsive quite fast…

If I’m waiting for girls to answer my messages, I’m not able to really focus on anything else or have a good time. This month is the first in a year where I’ve not been chasing girls and I’ve finally been able to enjoy life, unlike the whole last year. I guess it’s just a matter of weeks or days before the big hunger comes back, and it doesn’t feel right either to do nothing like now and lose the skills I’ve been really suffering the last year to develop. Atm I have almost zero motivation to do a comeback though. So, is this problem something I just have to live with? Online dating is the worst, but as I’ve gotten better at pickup, there has also been an increasing amount of flaky girls, which make the problem worse.

Since elementary school I've only wanted one single thing in my life: A girlfriend. 16 years later: Absolutely nothing has happened there. Last summer I was so depressed that there were only two chocies: Start doing pickup and all that, or kill myself. Unfortunately I chose the first. Since then my life has been a nightmare so bad I didn't even know it was possible. I've been on around 40 dates and every single one of them just end with a message the following day where they say they didn't feel the chemistry. Right now I've just had the worst night of my life, where not a single girl at the club I was at wanted to talk to me, and I probably approached around 30 of them. So far this year: All food tastes like ash and it has become so difficult to work out that I give up most of the workouts. I really wish I was dead. The only thing that keeps me alive is that I care too much about my immediate family to commit suicide. Now what?

Well, it finally happened. Guess I didn't make the wrong choise after all

@flowboy I was on a date yesterday and followed your advice. It went really well and I think I could have gotten her home with me if only we had had one more drink. Will definitely continue to go more with the flow from now!

I’ve never really been insecure about this. I’m just making a wild guess here, cause I have no fucking clue what I’m doing wrong.

I had a couple of trips in August/September. Didn’t have that clear intent though, but that was some real psychological horror! I was confronted with my suicidal thoughts and then I discovered my true face (made a topic about that) which has lowered my self-image. My problems are much much worse now, so I don’t know if I have the balls to it…

I will have that in the back of my mind, but I actually don’t see how I could be much more direct. I’m so used to touching girls at this point that I actually feel pretty confident about it. I always touch the girls who give me their number (which are A LOT these days!) when I’m out doing pickup.

Been on 4 new dates, and I've been escalating much more. It only seems to make things worse. I even asked one of them what I'm doing wrong at the end and she primarily criticized me for touching her on a first date... Could it be that they find my really small hands creepy to be touched by? I'm not that short, but my hands are like a child's.

No. I actually have no clue why.

Yes, I do. I’ve been living in solitude mostly because I got ditched by the friends who I actually liked, and the rest of my friends are the absolute worst. Now they don’t like me much either, mostly because I’m into personal development and pickup I think. I never had much sexual desire until last autumn. I’ve always been way more into hugs and kisses. After I got my first (August) and second (January) kiss, all my suffering went out the window and I was in heaven the next day. Unfortunately, since I’m so inexperienced, the kisses were dealbreakers with both girls and I got turned down by both. During my third kiss (last week) I was so nervous that I would fuck it up again, so it didn’t give me that much pleasure, but I got a second date with her next week, so that’s good!

It’s more like 20, and you don’t have to be good looking to have great pictures. I paid (way too much) for mine. I have a friend who’s become sort of a king of Tinder, and there’s nothing spectacular about his appearance. He even has a creepy moustache! This could be the best dating advise I’ve ever gotten. It’s probably so obvious that no teacher thinks it’s worth mentioning, but I don’t think I’ve really done this even once…

I take my vitamins, so no problem there! It’s more that I have a voice in my head that keeps telling me that I’m an incel and I’m gonna be miserable afterwards anyway, so why bother suffering through this exhausting/boring stuff? One hell of a good point too. My worst days are usually the ones that start with a workout, for some reason.

This is pretty accurate. Sex was not the intention on most of the dates I’ve been on. I’ve heard that you should either have sex on the first or third date (home date), so I’ve mostly played it “safe” and chose the last option. Like I mentioned earlier, I’ve also misinterpreted some theory completely and acted very cold and distant. This because of the fear of "acting too needy” that every coach/teacher keeps demonizing. I also heard one girl in a podcast say that she is attracted to a guy when he acts like he doesn’t want her. I’ve had that in the back of my mind on every date. Yet I really have tried to physically escalate on most of the dates. My absolutely worst have actually been with the very few girls who were willing to go on a second date. Since they were willing to do so, I took it for granted that they were attracted, so I would start with the most innocent leg flirting and then they would just pull their leg away like I was infected with something. You don’t know true frustration until you’ve experienced this! Most of these 40 dates have been through Tinder, and they usually go far worse than the ones I’ve gained through pickup. Even though two of the three kisses I’ve had has been with girls from Tinder.

@Ulax I’m not so sure I’m that traumatized. For most of my adult life I’ve lived in almost complete solitude. It worked rather well, and my life was pretty good until one and a half years ago when I started studying. There I was surrounded by girls again for the first time since high school and my old strong desires were awakened to life. For other reasons I quit the studies and went back to solitude last year, but then I became very miserable. It wasn’t until summer, when I was on the verge of suicide, that I was finally able to bite the bullet and be proactive about this problem for the first time in my life. Until then I always hoped that I would find someone through work/studies or social circle. I really despised the idea of pickup and online dating. I do stage green activities too by the way.

I’ve actually just found out what I’ve been doing wrong after finally finding some infield dating videos. I’ve misinterpreted the theory completely and acted like a cold and distant scumbag. Almost completely opposite of how you should act during a date. Reading/listening to theory can be really dangerous!

I can never thank you guys enough for the help I'm getting here. I'm really touched!

@RendHeaven @JonasVE12 What’s strange is that inner game usually works opposite in my case. Yesterday I actually was in a pretty good mood after a highly successful day game, where my results have been skyrocketing the last month. Last week I was in a terrible mood, but still went out and had my best night so far. My biggest problem now is the lack of energy. I don’t have enough of it to even work out or make food. I find all personal development, except being out and doing pickup, almost impossible atm.

Yeah, that's totally me! Probably explains why I'm such an attention whore as well. Fits my really introverted personality rather badly... I guess you're right. I haven't been taking therapy seriously enough. Will do from now!