Ethan1

Watched videos on YouTube with Rich Dad Poor Dad. Got ads to join a course called Amazing Selling Machine X. They pitched the course as a lucrative business course that was nearly fail proof. Never mentioned anything to do with the percentage of failed businesses. At the time to join the course cost $5000 I figured in 2018 I would have a chance to join & be successful. It was mostly people that were affiliate marketers that were pitching it to gullible people with available cash to spend. Just graduated with a bachelors degree in Finance & took multiple entrepreneurship courses in college. I figured I would go all in & devote all my energy to creating a business. I just had my real estate license & was about to buy a house. Decided not to & buy into this course. So I put down the $5000 on a credit card & paid it off the next day. I was all in. Spent nearly 2 years every single day nearly +12 hours a day on ASM working my ass off. Doing the course videos to a point. Actively involved in the forum all the time. Asking the most questions every single day among thousands of people. Excluding myself from having a social life. Devoted all my energy to it. Lived & slept for it. All I ever talked about or thought about. Obsessed over it. Zero life balance. I did everything I could. I ended up allocating $15,000 for inventory & freight forwarding. Got nearly 3500 units of "coffee pourovers". And got into a " sunk cost fallacy". Now I was +$20k invested into this “Amazon game“. All the hard money I worked my ass off on in the military working as an aircraft mechanic in hot ass weather overseas in combat zones. Work environment sucked balls but I saved every dollar to invest & start a business. Ends up I was one of the most dedicated people on the website. Spending nearly the most time compared to even most of the mentors on the website. Even spent nearly $2k to fly to Las Vegas event for a seller con 2019 event for amazing selling machine at the MGM casino. Was a waste of money. Networked with a ton of people that were beyond clueless and doing very skeptical things. Yet tons of successful people from all over the world were there too. I feel like they were basically praying on people's emotions to get a dollar. Not authentically trying to help people become successful financially & make a difference. Toward the middle of 2019 I was losing money on each sale b/c I was stuck in a price war. I lost my ranking bc I ran out of inventory. I had nearly a perfect product but the course never prepared me for competitors that could buy out the market. Who have deeper pockets to blitz the market with more sponsored ads and have a larger inventory to sell at a lower price. Essentially a price war. I lost out because I didn't have enough inventory to sustain. In addition people were buying fake reviews which became a headache. People were manipulating the system in so many ways. Chinese companies were entering the market and hyjacking everything. I was trying to force sales with sponsored ads. Wasted a couple thousand dollars on ads on Amazon. This ate away all the profits and cost me big time. Bc I was selling below profit & using too many ads to compete. Created a mastermind group outside the course with some of the top members of the forum. The members of the group were aware of how outdated the course was and how people were being mislead. Ended up losing upwards of $7k. Not to include the course which was $5k. Overall, $12,000. Also, other random expenses that were added on for the course. Such as "seller pro" which was an extention to the course to give more micro courses. Also other websites like helium 10, hiring tons of people on fiverr. I also got really screwed by a marketing company I tried to hire in my local town. I asked help with creating the brand. Cost $1400. I put down $700 upfront & gave them free products to test out. Told them what I wanted & expected. They didn't get back with me for a few months. They then sent me an email with the work they did. They simply wrote a super short slogan & a really bad brand story. Then requested I pay the remaining $700 now. I thought they were joking. Felt like I was being coerced. I literally paid $15 on fiverr for some Nigerian guy to write something similar. He did it within a few days for way less. His writing was 10x better. It felt like I was being bullied by this company b/c I was younger than them. They did not take me seriously & were being disrespectful in soo many ways. I saw their true colors. They were being bullies. Ended up not paying the 2nd half. I thought I was going to go to small claims court about this but didn't. Talk about a waste of time & money. Also tried to get my money back from the Amazon course & they would not do it. Saw tons of naive people join the course and lose their shirts. People would put all of it on credit card thinking it was a get rich quick & pay off the credit cards. NOPE. People with kids & bills to pay got deeper in debt. Even saw people that had 1000s of units in inventory short sell bc they were over their heads. The course did not disclose anything with the financial risks upfront. Let alone preparation for the amount to invest upfront. Let alone proper business plans or full due diligence. Any one with $5k or willingness to pay installments could join. The people who made the course were making a killing with over 15,000 members in the course. Learned that it's your responsibility to do your own research. Not to depend on a course to tell you everything. That business is not black & white. That even business school will not prepare you for all the blinds pots with the real world. That there are tons of unethical people out there that will do anything for a dollar. That you have to have multiple competitive advantages to win. That you have to be extremely concise with expectations upfront for people or they will short hand you if possible. That these courses are in it for their own best interest.

Today I decided to remove the YouTube app off my phone and to take a break from it. I realize this is my main addiction of all distractions that I have. I spend roughly 5 hours per day on this single app. Not sure if I am more addicted to my phone or just the YouTube app. I spend an abnormally large amount of time on that app. It's crazy how easily I can dissociate while watching simple videos. Especially most of the content I consume is primarily for learning and growing. I plan on limiting my use of YouTube to my laptop and enabling the DF YouTube extension to avoid getting distracted on the website. Curious what other people think about YouTube as an addiction. Especially other websites like Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, and any other addictive sites/apps. It's a great website to learn new things but the amount of endless content can become a major distraction.

What are some ways you have gotten to know your true self?

What am I?... What does this really even mean??? I am Beliefs? I am the beliefs I was given? I am thoughts? My thoughts are not me? I am words? I am roles? Roles are not really me? I am stories I tell others? I am stories others tell me? I am what I do? My job is not me? My career is not me? I am my body? My body is not entirely me? I am my mind? What defines the self? What is the I? What is the meaning of am? What is the "I am" ? I am who I say I am? Or not? If I am not who I say I am then who am I really? I am not what I think I am, I am not what you think I am, I am what I think you think I am?? I am who I want to be? Or I am already me? Here I am? Who am I really? Am I real? Who is that? What is real? Am I fake? Who is that? What is fake? I am God? I am an aspect of God? I am the devil? I am an aspect of devilry? I am an ego? False self? I am not the ego? True self? I am part of reality? Realty is a part of me? I am what my words speak into reality? Tell me who am I? I will tell myself who I am? I am enough I am awareness I am strength I am conciousness I am wisdom I am energy I am power I am love I am alive

Someone from actualized.org needs to go do a field study experiment with this to find out truth. ? From my experience, I dated a mississipi stripper once named Angel a while back and she knew a thing or two. #wisdom Her occupation was "dancer" on plenty of fish. Man was I confused when I met her.

@Eternal Unity Hmm sounds like a mix of self-talk / free-association / self-inquiry. I like that idea! Reminds me of IFS therapy & parts work too. Also, sentence stemming techniques for self-inquiry. Pulling to mind the first thought/question that arrives and rolling with it? I like it! I yam what I yam ?

I yam what I yam lolol.. That's hilarious! I find it odd reading the comment section of that video how oblivious people are to the statement being made. Popeye was finding complete self-acceptance of who he was in the moment. Zero shame for his role. Started spitting fire for authenticity, congruence, and ownership. I had no clue there was a movie on the cartoon.

He's just trolling to get reactions... Nothing more than that. He could probably careless what people think. If it gets him more attention Positive or negative that's all that matters

@Preety_India@Preety_India Thanks for sending me the mind map! @Joshi3 sooo via exposure to stressful environments vs comfort zones? Challenging the self

@hyruga So book smarts (knowledge) vs direct experience? Or is this like the difference between thinking vs feeling. Fully knowing the self is only possible via feeling states..? Having direct experience in relationships reflects back ourself? Could you elaborate further

Attitude is everything. Attitudes are contagious. If you're coping then it's time to focus on meeting your own needs. Then once you're thriving it will become easier to see. Perceptions change when your attitude changes. Positive attitude, positive frame of reality. Focus on meeting your needs in a healthy way. Healthy coping mechanisms such as self-care. Go get a massage Go do some exercising Set boundaries with ass holes Get away from technology Do things that you enjoy Go somewhere new Do something new

Find self-acceptance and focus on self-care.. Traveling solo around the US alone teaches one to adapt to loneliness in New environments. Gives a different perspective on being an outsider. Going from town to town not knowing a soul. Especially feeling different when meeting different sub-cultures(unfamiliar). From my mind, finding self-acceptance is the key. Accepting what is and trying to dig deeper to understand why you feel a certain way. I've been living on the road for about a year now. Away from family & friends. People come and go. Meet strangers/friends every day if you surround yourself in the right environments. My definition of a friend has evolved from when I left. Knowing that life is always changing. Friends come and go. Leaving the friends I make in one town and meeting new people in the next. Letting go. For me it's been more the journey to have a relationship with myself. I think most people are seeking self-assurance and affirmation/worth in others. Escapism via friendships to meet an unmet need. But still it might come down to your attachment style. Understanding things like abandonment trauma and attachment trauma helps. Besides all that it truly comes down to meeting your own needs and filling your own cup. If you feel satitated then awesome but if you feel you're only getting emotional crumbs then it's worth diving deeper.

@Preety_India I think the last time we talked.. Knowing core values is one aspect of self. Knowing values.. Knowing one's self-beliefs.. Knowing self-love.. Knowing self-care.. Knowing one's personality.. Knowing one's trauma.. Knowing one's strengths and weaknesses.. Knowing one's love language.. Knowing one's interests.. Knowing one's attitudes.. Knowing one's disinterests.. Knowing one's goals.. Knowing one's past.. Knowing one's body.. Knowing one's emotions.. Knowing one's self-talk.. List goes on & on.... ... Created another mindmap that explodes the entire self-concept. I could nearly create a course with all the information I've gathered..

I figured a flow state is when you let go into the process or the moment. Not caring about the outcome but enjoying the moment of taking action. Then watching as the momentum builds with challenging the self to let go. Subconcious and habits take over. Sounds like the opposite of flow is to try and control every aspect of it. Using the concious mind to micromanage everything. As if a process of habits is from building a slow momentum. Constantly focused on moving the ball forward or energy outward. To get distracted or overwhelmed is to fall out of this state. So in sports a person is both focused and relaxed. They give it there all but aren't focused on winning or losing. About performing at max potential in each and every moment. Challenging the self. Tracking can help but over tracking would be too focused on the trees. Rathertham focused on the forest. Have a big picture but balance between enjoying the process. If you don't enjoy the process then it will be a state of resistance. The flow to relationships is emotions. If you want to master that then master your own emotions. Be aware of how communication can build up certain emotions. Both positive and negative via attitudes. Carry a positive attitude and it will attract relationships. Do the opposite and it will attract the opposite. Action taking momentum is a thing. The more organized you are with doing then can you get things done more quickly. Moving slow ratherthan moving fast. Habits have to be installed. As if learning a new skill builds on repetition. Becomes second nature. Dumping into skills. Rather focus on habits. Keystone habits that have a compound effect in other micro habits. Look at habits that impact your energy level. More energy you have physically then the more decisions you can put out mentally/emotionally towards other habits.

So Google, Facebook/Instagram, WPP, Omnicom, Amazon, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube.. Some of the largest conglomerates make most of their cash flow from advertising. Literally make up the entire S&P500 in terms of market capitalization. Then seeing how annoying it is to get ads after every single video on YouTube is extremely frustrating. (Yes, there are ad blockers) Where is the ethics behind advertising? Where is the accountability? Seems like any narrative can be pushed out into the public to alter beliefs and perception of reality. (Yes, there's freedom of speech) Some of the advertising is straight up manipulation but when you report these ads YouTube shows more of it to insight anger. In the past I sold on Amazon a few years ago and spent roughly $10,000 on advertising to sell products. Just to compete with other sellers it was a requirement. Which is absolutely nothing in comparison to large companies like Coca-Cola and Anheuser Busch companies. The advertising budget is insane that these people allocate. Talk about mass hypnosis from billions of dollars being forced to control the eyes, ears, attention, and thoughts of millions of people daily. I understand that there's a paradox between getting leads from sponsored ads to creates sales. It is mind boggling to think how our schema of reality comes from these social narratives. Especially political campaigns that spend abnormally large amounts of money for certain stories and visual aids to create perceptions. Which most people are clueless to the emotional appeal and emotional triggers that are being poked at. As if the skinnard experiment with the pigeon went viral in advertising across the entire country. Let alone the split testing experiments and surveys are building up massive amounts of data to know what creates buy-in. Then the conversion ratios for purchases/views is becoming such a science is disturbing. Then adding in artificial intelligence and deep learning systems that will take this to a next level. I'm just frustrated at how much is spent in advertising daily without any real concern for the long term consequences.

Good chance most people are unconsciously using the site for entertainment purposes to fulfill unmet needs. Or to gain a feeling of attention which calls for low quality topics. Ratherthan few are focused to be informed to gain knowledge & wisdom. Escapism is all around man - Way to cope with day-to-day life. I notice that I occasionally unconsciously check this site few times per day. Takes away boredom at times. I realize the pattern of behaviors but I don't want to guilt myself. However, at the same time there is more good here than watching cable TV or other vices. Man habits are relentless.. Still have to consider the demographics here. Some people come from backgrounds where they weren't exposed to certain information so different people are at different levels on their path. Some people have 1st grade level ideas and are needing help. Others have university level ideas. Really just have to recognize not everyone has the same intentions or attention to think to certain levels of depth. Same goes for youtube. There are plenty of low quality videos. Finding the high quality content can be hard to find. Just have to focus on what suits your needs. Same goes for conciousness. I see it like scuba diving. Some people like to stay in the shallow end because it is safe. Going too deep down it gets darker and harder to breathe. Requires more skill sets and training. Less people go to the bottom of the ocean because it's easy to get lost. The deeper one goes, the less people there are around to be understood by. Communication breaks down and things get taken out of context. Too nuance. Simplistic topics conserves energy. Most people a mentally lazy and prefer a low quality diet of information. Really really advanced topics requires high levels of attention and study. Most people get bored after 10 seconds. Most people are overwhelmed by work and shitty circumstances. Welcome to planet earth where humans are lazy creatures. They only use energy if their survival depends on it. Maslow hierarchy of needs is a bitch..

All connected to social cues. Not acknowledging someone's words can be disrespectful. Interrupting and talking over someone can be a little disrespectful. Not speaking up can be seen as weak or humble. Talking down to someone can be disrespectful - downward communication. Things people respect varies from culture to culture. State to state. Group to group. Case by case. Customs and courtesies? Talking too loud can be perceived by one as obnoxious and disrespectful in one context. Then in others it's seen as confidence and worthy of respect. Eye contact can be perceived as respectful and disrespectful. How one dresses can be perceived as respectful or disrespect. Being naked in public is disrespectful in some places. Military is all about rules to harness respect. The uniform is a sign of respect. Disrespecting the uniform means zero respect for the entire system. In court we are recommended to address the judge by certain names. "your honor"... Lordship. Or you can be perceived contempt of court in some cases. Parents use belts to discipline their kids to respect which is not socially acceptable to beat your grandma or wife. (Unless it's dysfunctional). Using fear and intimidation to create respect. Then a person that ignores text messages or phone calls a person can be perceived as passive aggressive which is a sign of disrespect for time. Then a person can disrespect property, ideas, bodies w/ physical touch, rape seems to be kinda disrespectful, warfare seems a little like disrespect... Respecting proximity. Being too close to someone. Respecting a person house and property. Respecting a persons life decisions. Shyness and being a people pleaser leads to pure disrespect and welcomes abuse. People test others to see how much disrespect they will tolerate. As if some people get off on seeing how much they can get away with. Some people are so deeply traumatized that they have zero self-esteem to stand up for their self against bullies in social settings. Social fears of speaking up in public can lead to a lack of self-respect and lower ones sense of esteem. Then it becomes a confirmation loop for self-attack and netagtive self-talk. Til the person learns self-acceptance and courage. People with money earn more respect than those that lack it. However, extremely rich people can create envy which invites disdain and resentment. One-upping others can be a little disrespectful. Having to feel bigger/better can make others feel less than and causing attitudes of disrespect.

Curious what others know about the topic of respect: Respect vs disrespect Respect vs love Respect vs power Self-respect vs self-neglect Respect & self-esteem Respect & open mindedness Respect & personal values Respect & social status Respect & boundaries

Seems like family systems & society teach the beliefs on respect. A. Respect is earned and not given B. Respect is given freely C. Respect is both given and earned I grew up in a family system that respect was based on external success & occupation. Moms side of family didn't care about respect. They were push overs and had zero boundaries/mostly enmeshment. Then the women became very domineering and disrespectful. As you if authority figures can use coercion to command respect/power. "Respect or honor your parents" Then I chased my father's approval but it was never enough. As if validation was connected to his level of respect. Then when I was willing to cut him out of my life completely he starts being respectful. Seems like respect is a very complex, relative, subjective thing to talk about based on circumstances, personality type, tonality, body language, past experiences, and preferences. Personally, I went in the air force and acquired a rank of staff sergeant. You'd think family and friends would give respect for that. However, even rank/position in a system does not guarantee any form of respect. Even being knowlegeable and having skills people can show attitudes of contempt/disdain. Respect is such a nuance thing. Beliefs, values, and attitudes intertwine with perceptions of value/worth. Adding that people can misperceive another and lose respect which causes them to become closed-minded to the person's words. Attitudes connect to the amount of respect one displays to another.

Ok so I get curious about what the heck happened in the 1960's to cause a massive shift in society.. It was like a cluster of huge shifts in society from all directions. Psychodelic era - Timothy Leri Sexual revolution/ Free Love Main stream society challenged Hippie culture / counter culture Long hair, don't care Commune/ group orientation Flower power protests Women's movement Radical openmindness Questioning authority Social status disruption. Less identified with occupation Musical expansion Free thinking - Thinking for one's self Religious/spiritual awakening/ questioning dogma Expressing emotions more openly What would a modern day counter culture movement look like?? What could cause a shift in modern society to create a part 2 counter culture revolution? Society seems to be entrapped by this information era. Technology is practically controlling the minds of the masses. Where most people are fully hooked to devices - dissociated. Would people begin to let go of technology more? Considering millenials were born into technology and social media. What would a responsible hippie look like? Considering stereotypically hippies were seen as irresponsible people. Then it shifted to hyper-responsiblity Workaholic parents. What would evolution from orange to green be? With baby boomers coming closer to retirement and the next generation is practically entrenched with debt. With older generations retiring in 2031 could cause a domino effect? With the evolution of YouTube/internet and people gaining millions of followers online lead to a power shift in structures of society?

@mimi Ey you're welcome! I really got a lot of that book or audio book.. Highly recommend the audio book. I've just finished listening to it a 2nd time I can relate to what you're going through or tolerated.. It like living with 5 year olds (emotionally speaking)

Probably he means well but is controlling. Probably has a certain set of limiting beliefs and values that conflict. Sounds emotionally immature. You can't change him. All you can do is change yourself and set limits/boundaries. I recommend a booked called Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents. I recently listened to it on Audible - Highly recommend. Really depends on your mindset. All I can say is sit down and come up with a game plan. Create a budget. Determine what you are willing to sacrifice to have a better living environment. If you want to move, then move.

Here's a mind map for spiral dynamics stage yellows to help visually understand with images. https://www.mindomo.com/mindmap/e417fcdf6d894fe3b17d07996fd6d2cc If you have anything you want to add into this map feel free to edit & create a point to grow the spiral outwards.

@BartekD If your goal is to just cut rent cost.. First thing I would do is put an ad on craigslist about putting an RV on someones property Negotiate helping work around the property to help lower rent cost too. Best to find a place with all the utility hook ups. I've been hooked up with just a simple 15amp cord. And have a water connection too. That app I shared with you will save a ton $! I never stayed at a single RV site for a few months. Most rv sites are like $20-$100 per night. Whereas with iOverlander there's places where you can boondock for free up to a week. It's kind of a crowd sourced app where people share locations to stay at. Some RV sites do allow you to stay on their property for free if you are willing to work. Plus they will pay in addition. If anything, I'd recommend looking for like a website to rent a small RV for a week. Take it for a test ride and see if you can get acclimated to the lifestyle and driving. See what works best for you before pulling the trigger on a big purchase/investment. It would be a pain in the butt to live in a van for a year. A small rv is more realistic for a living situation in my opinion. The fridges are larger and can run off propane & electricity. Vans typically require a small ice chest size fridge & solar setup to keep running. Not to say it's impossible. I've seen people living out of their car while traveling which seems even more difficult to deal with. Again, if your goal is to cut cost on rent. It's best to find a place where you can negotiate the rent really low. I was able to get my rent down to $250 a month in Colorado Springs which is insanely low for the area. Most people would spend upwards of $700-$1000 per month. Plus, I have 2 bunk beds in the back. I could have easily allowed someone to stay in it to cut costs even more. It sounds all nice and dandy to travel but once you're on the road your living situation becomes less stable. For stability purposes a long time renter is better for cutting costs. How did you come to the decision to start doing this and what pushed you into it? I came across the decision because I'm super frugal. I got out of the military and never traveled. Lived in a small town Alabama where I had very few social connections. I was ready to get away from family and be more independent. I was curious what was out there. I wanted something new. I was bored. To find a place that fit my personality and be around like minded people. Mostly personal reasons why I left. Took a lot of courage to pull the trigger because of fear. Either way even though I would be living in a vehicle id be staying in one state for about a year, and still work my 9-5, do you think its worth it to do that? That's what I did. I stayed on my brothers property for a year in the RV. Spent most of the time fixing it up and helping him. Basically we found a RV that had water damage. Purchased it for like $4000. Removed all the water damage. Then I got obsessed with pimping it out to make it feel right. There's so much crap to buy for RVs its ridiculous. It's like owning a small apartment but you can take it anywhere. (almost anywhere) Also RV life seems much closer to what im looking for as well so thanks for pointing that out. No Problem man, I wish I had someone give me advice when I was first starting out. What's nice is being able to disconnect the RV and leave it somewhere so if you ever decide to get out of camping in it full time you could easily store it on someones property for less than $100 month. Or lease it to someone in the worst case scenario. When you say it can get expensive what do you mean by that? Propane can get expensive in the winter time so get like an oil radiator heater. Yet a 1500W still will eat up electricity like crazy. About $80 in electricity. I'd recommend buying a wifi electricity monitor to connect to a 15amp wall outlet. I track my power usage every day. Device only cost like $20. Really depends on where you go and how far you travel. Mostly the upfront cost to get the appropriate travel gear. Whereas, on the road it's all dependent on a ton of variables. How big the RV or camper or whatever is. Just a ton of variables that come into play. It can be super cheap in some cases too. Gotta have a plan.