AryaBhata

No prior history of psychiatric/recreational drug use. (apart from 2-3 weeks on zoloft). I developed depersonalization/derealization disorder in December 2016, and recovered completely by December 2018. What I'm experiencing currently is very, very different to anything I experienced then. September 1st to 5th (2019) : Took 5 mg of Abilify (Noticed my confidence levels beginning to decline, slight depression/dread/panic beginning to creep in, creativity/cognitive abilities seemed slightly diminished) September 6th to 15th (2019) : Increased dose to 10 mg (Symptoms listed above became worse, and developed severe restlessness) September 15th to 23rd (2019) : Tapered over a period of 1 week. Restlessness improved but other symptoms became slightly worse September 23rd to 30th (2019) : Depression continued to increase. On the 30th I started experiencing the worst case of depersonalization I've ever experienced. Severe depression, thoughts and emotions gone, could barely function cognitively. I'm a bit calmer now and the depression has subsided, but the main symptoms haven't improved still. During my previous episode of depersonalization/derealization I could read, think and function more or less normally. I'm profoundly gifted and could make it through a 300 page novel in about an hour. Loved reading, writing, puzzle solving, had very strong opinions, etc. Now my mind is completely blank. I struggle to have conversations (have started stammering a lot because I words don't come to my mind), read and generally do anything I was easily able to do before.